A How To on How to Get in Between A Scorpio's Legs

1. Look like an art model -


all the scorpio broads i know worship and tight, toned body...

of course, all girls love a nice, fit body, but a scorpio broad will fuck you just because you look like an art model with a tight-toned body...


a chick of another sign like an aqua for example, will act like she doesn't even care about you posing with your goods, while fantasizing in her spaced out head about your art modelness and your tight abs and muscular arms (all the aqua women i know love nice arms, but fuck that..this is about scorpio broads..i can feel them getting jealous already!) but getting in an aqua's pants just because you have a nice body is a TOTALLY different encyclopedia...


as i was saying, while a scorpio broad will fuck you just because you are physically hot, another sign will not...


2. Act like you are superior to her or better than her and BE THAT -

this requires walking a very fine line, and if you don't know what you are doing it will end in disater..."disaster" meaning that you will be out of some good ass sex, at least from that particular chica...

If you are not in tune with yourself and others on a vibrational wavelength, DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME!




3. In anything you do, FOLLOW THROUGH!

if you are gonna walk the fuck out, then WALK THE FUCK OUT!

don't allow her pitiful pleas for you to stay to cause you to vacillate and stray from your course..

A scorpio broad wants to manipulate EVERY SITUATION!

case in point:

one night after getting some very good head for about 25 minutes, we were ready to do the deed and this broad kept sending me on stupid little errands!

telling me shit like, "go get another condom" or "i'm getting hot, go and get the portable fan" or some other stupid shit...

if its not one thing, its another stupid piece of shit thing she wants to make you do to pull your strings!


i could deal with all that as long as i knew sex was at the end of the obstacle course, but AFTER sex?

my god! these scorpio broads wanna talk a fucking HOLE in your ear!


i just wanna get some sleep or relax with some soft music and peace and quiet after i have some really good sex, not get assaulted on end with a barrage of words filled with random emotions!

so finally, after i had enough of all this bs, i tell her, "can you please be quiet?" (bad move)


she looks at me in amazement and says,

"are you telling me to shut up in my own house?"

of course, it all went downhill from there...

i said,


"look, you are making me work too hard and i am not sure i wanna do all of this work.."


she turns to me in the bed and says, "you can leave if you want to.."

before she had even finished her sentence, i was already getting up out of the bed and putting my clothes on...it was music to my ears and i couldn't wait to get the hell out of there...

i guess she wasn't so comfortable with my hasty readiness and willingness to leave that place like a bat out of hell, so she started pleading with me in the most pitiful manner! i felt sorry for her and she was begging me to stay and i didn't want her to feel rejected...

i mean, she is 36, single, has a cat (who she adopted from a shelter for abused animals) and very lonely...i mean, career wise, she is set, she has a nice place and does very well for herself, but she is LONELY...

she really made me feel bad...

so i relented and took off my clothes again and laid back down in the bed, i was lying down for no more then five minutes in cold, dead silence between the two of us when she says to me,

"i think you should leave."

of course, i was gone for good at that point..she just HAD to have the last word about it...

4. NEVER Tell a Scorpio Broad to be Quiet In Her Own House -


(see #3)



5. If A Scorpio Invites You Into Her Bed, Tell Her You Don't Plan On Having Sex With Her, But Take Your Clothes Off Anyways and Tell Her You Sleep Naked As an Excuse -


(if you meet requirement #1, you will have succeeded in accomplishing the mission at that point..)

Ahahhahahahaha that's the funniest thread I've read!! Doesn't have to be a scorpio ANY woman would've thrown you out!!!

lol, oh goodness.

"all the scorpio broads i know worship and tight, toned body..."

not if it's attached to a penis the size of an infant's...

besides, if you had done your job correctly she'd be too busy sleeping to want to talk!

Hahahahahahaha....I'm laughing AT you, fundamental (not "with" you, incase there's any confusion). Can you say pretentious?

I realise you get a kick out of the responses you get on here, but the egotistical tones of your posts are nothing short of fucking hilarious.

Lighten up ladies!!! Some people are our soul mates and some are just friends with benefits!! obviously she was a "friend with benefits" because from what I can gather, they had just met...must have been a first time for them as he hadn't realized she would talk for hours after the fact & if he was besotted with her he would have listened to her no matter what she was saying!

Yeah he might be a prick but one day someone will have him crawling on his hands and knees...

i love that word, "besotted".

Fundamental,

Some scorp woman must have brused your little ego. LOL!!! Anyway, FYI, scorp woman are actually very selective about who they let have their goodies. Yes it is true, we love to have sex, we love the whole experience, but one must be worthy... Maybe you were just a pitty fuck?

@ sweethearts:

i disagree that "any woman" would have thrown me out...

take for example a taurus...


whenever i tell a taurus broad to be quiet because i need silence, she does it even WHEN i am in her house in HER bed...

she will SULK and be ANGRY, but she will just go to another room...

and with her taurean persistence for which taurus is well known, i will usually find her in the bed a few hours later with her lips wrapped around my dick waking me up to a nice, warm blowjob, which usually leads to some good hard fucking..


and in the MORNING?

that shit is the BEST...

but a scorpio is not so wise, because while she kicks you out, she wakes up ALONE the next morning, and the morning after that and the morning after that...you get the point...

all for what? just because a guy needs some peace and quiet?

gimme a fucking break..


@ aurora:

i can honestly say that i have never given a pity fuck to a girl and a girl have never given me one..

and if you EVER saw me, you would know just exactly WHY girls open their legs for me..


you would be singing quite a different tune then...



@ bellabeautiful:

i know about you taurus broads, don't worry about that!

and if i were in a better mind state, i would probably be with one now but sometimes the sheer simplicity and homely, comfortable nature of you people drives me MAD!

perhaps i will end up with a taurus if i am ever to crave stability in my life...

and i don't know about the part about taurus broads working "hard" during sex..

i think if missionary is ANYONE's favorite position, it's Taurus...

and they never really seem to like to change it up that much, freaky and sexually charged as they may be...

they like it the same way every time and that shit can get boring..

aside from that, taurus broads definitely give scorpios a run for their money..


and they are SOOO much more easy going and chilled out!


@ stingerbaby:

you say "woman", i say "broad"

i say tomato, you say "toMAto"...



i am so in the weeds over here...

i gotta come back later and deal with the rest of you hating bitches...

As previously stated "fund a "mental" your deliriously funny.

Now I know you are one of those men that talk is cheap. The more you talk the more that I realize you really don't get any women do you? Poor thing!

Spose in the next sentence you will tell us you have a 12 inch dick!?!? Sweetheart that's what you are talking through!!!!

Now we are all laughing at you!

@ greatbull:

keep up the good work, then...

i would STRONGLY advise AGAINST getting too bulky...that muscle-head shit is sooo 80's/90's...


better to just be toned and fit with nice cuts and lines..(if you already are, nevermind..)


@ someonespecial:

are you giving me an invitation?

come on, don't be coy..at the very LEAST, that sounds like a challenge!

@ oddball:

how are my claims "unjustified" or "excessive", which would qualify them as being "pretentious" as you say?

if i told you i am a CHOSEN ONE (i am) and have been struck by a car THREE times and gotten in FIVE motorcyle accidents all without a scratch (i was), would you still say i am being "pretentious"?

of course you would...


and "egotistical" i am not...extremely SELF-AWARE i am...


@ loyalistrebel:

i haven't the foggiest idea as to exactly what you are trying to convey...


@ sweethearts:

your intuition serves you correctly (not the part about me being a prick)...

she was a random bar who basically seduced me in a bar where i was working and where she was a regular...

she came, she saw, and i conquered...(i was attracted to her, of course..)

but although i got some very strong vibes that she wanted to be more than just a late-night fuck for when i got off from work at 3am, i was not feeling her in that way...


and btw, a bonds trader or a stock-broker or hedge fund manager on wall street is considered one of the best catches there is...


and these are guys who refer to themselves as "BIG SWINGING DICKS"...

so what is worse, a perceived "prick" or a "BIG SWINGING DICK"?

if you agree that people of such professions are a good catch, then you seriously have an imbalance in your mental bearings and moral bearings..

"and have been struck by a car THREE times and gotten in FIVE motorcyle accidents all without a scratch" (i was),

ohhhh...I see! Brain damage. That explains it.

@ stingerbaby:

i WOULD hook up with your ex, but ONLY if she's HOT...

i doubt someone like you could get a girl who is in my league, though...

prove me wrong, buddy...prove me wrong...



@ queenscorpio:

a scorpio woman "bruised my ego"?


i think not...

in fact, i made it quite clear that i felt sorry for her and wanted to spare rejection...

at her age, she can't afford it as much as i can in my youthful prime...i am aware of this and i DO have a heart regardless of how warped your take on this matter are...

i let her have that..if it makes her feel better about herself, GOOD..i mean that..

the point is, it doesnt change how i feel or what i KNOW about MYSELF either way...


and true, scorpio women are VERY selective about who they let in between their legs..

the guys, not so...

but men are from mars and women are from venus as they say, especially in the case of scorpios..

scorpios are freaks, but a certain KIND of freak..

for instance, a gemini ho will regularly participate in gangbangs of muliple guys in which she is the gangbangee with more sausages than her limited number of orifices can handle..


i know this from experience..gemini broads are SOOOO loose...


a scorpio broad will ATTEMPT this, but EVENTUALLY she will get overwhelmed by all those sausages at once...

the scorpio will still fuck every last one of those sausages and make them explode mind you, BUT she will do it ONE AT A TIME...


and the scorpio who DOES this is not your average, but i do know these scenarios to be the case with a few of them..

gemini broads? forget about it...that whole bunch is spoiled...there ain't no saving em..the whole lot of em will be damned to hell..


a scorpio broad with the proper direction, lets say that of a pisces, for example, has hope and a VERY bright future...

and most scorpio broads are aware of this if they are smart...


and me a "pity fuck"?


never...


@ bellabeautiful:


bring it on, baby..bring it on...

Now it's all coming together, you work in a bar/club great place to prey upon the desperately lonely drunks. Beer/wine googled women are easy prey reguardless of what you look like. You're obviously very picky and well worth 2 mins of their time!

i doubt the scorpio chick was drunk when she started stalking me after the first time i had sex with her and shot a huge load in her eye!

seriously, she called me the next night and said she had to stop by the bar because she "forgot her credit card.."

yeah right..

i checked and we didnt have her card..she just wanted an excuse to come by and see me without looking hard pressed...

i didn't care, thought..i just played along with her and acted dumb...

but in the end, shit like that counted AGAINST her...


i can't stand sneaky, little deceitful things like that because then they lead to some very powerful strings being attached if they are not nipped and snipped in the bud...


and in the bars where i have worked, much of the women clientele are HOT and LOOKING to be preyed upon if they are not already there with their b/f's...


even THEN, i still get those girls who come in with their men hitting on me while their man is away in the bathroom or some shit!

i get that a lot, and i am not saying that all the times they do it, its because i am so, hot..i don't doubt at other times they may have ulterior motives i.e. trying to make their b/f jealous because he is talking to another girl...whatever..i have seen it all before..all the drama..i am so wise to all of it...

so i size women up in an instant, i whatever they may need at the time, i have it to give...in ABUNDANCE..

well anything BESIDES money..i am still working on that!

@ sweethearts:

i prefer to think of my name more as a compound word that consists of "Fun" and "Mental"...

Mental fun that is fundamental to my nature!


and a 12 in dick i have not, and quite glad to say!

if i had a 12 in dick, i really wouldnt be getting laid then!

all the girls would run AWAY when they see my dick, not TOWARDS me!

a 12 in dick can do some serious damage to the average woman's vagina..

a gemini broad and a 12 in dick make a perfect fit, but a normal broad, she has enough sense to know that 12 in of dick is a little too much...


but as far as MY dick, i have never had ANY complaints..

in fact, i have had one girl refer to my dick as a "crane" dick when fully erect..

others have gasped in delight...

but enough about me..

what is your pussy like?


i wanna hear about THAT!


@ someonespecial:

brain damaged indeed...but not from my numerous accidents, i know at least that much..

and what you most likely consider NORMAL is my definition of brain damaged...

It's the one that would have you crawling on your hands and knees!!! But I wouldn't

"Fund A Mental" would spot a guy like you a mile away...

hmmm...

you may have just sparked my interest!

tell me more!

and you would sooooo dig me...so much so that you would want to "fund" all of my insane and "mental" ideas and adventures...

if you have the money, i can show you a very good time!

but only if you're HOT.

So your a prostitute— For the HOT & LONELY... one of which I'm not... I have loads of real friends... and my money I dont share especially with opportunists!


PLUS I'm a Sweetheart...not your type!

Fundamental,

Being a "chosen one" does not give you the right to be arrogant, disrespectful and talk cheaply of & towards others, as you do. It gives you no more right than anyone else to behave like an asshole, infact. Whether you are actually one (a chosen one) or not is another thing, I mean most people have guardians, and most of us are here for a purpose...What makes you think you're so much better than everyone else?

Let me tell you something, and anyone who is spiritual / open minded should be aware of this already...Ego is a weakness, and anyone who wants to walk such a path has to shed the ego in order to move forward. You believe in lessons? Then perhaps you should consider the deeper reasons as to why you were drawn here.

And yes, in my previous post I chose my words carefully (look up the proper definitions in the dictionary)...pretentious was hand-picked to suit the way you came across. Try re-reading your post from an external perspective.

I've actually seen you be quite nice and helpful when you want to be, so I really don't see the need for this nonsense of yours.

"but a scorpio is not so wise, because while she kicks you out, she wakes up ALONE the next morning, and the morning after that and the morning after that...you get the point...

all for what? just because a guy needs some peace and quiet?

gimme a treetrunking break.."

Because scorpio women have zeor tolerance for disrespectful idiots! BTW, I am sure any scorp had a great replacement for you after she kicked you out wether it was human or electronic.

"and if you EVER saw me, you would know just exactly WHY girls open their legs for me.."

Hmmm, and this is why you are here posting about being kicked out of a girls house without getting any?

"Being a "chosen one" does not give you the right to be arrogant, disrespectful and talk cheaply of & towards others, as you do."

Uhhh, that is where his bitterness is coming from, he wasn't chosen, he was played with and kicked out.

QS...He referred to himself as a chosen one, I presume in some sort of spiritual sense as he then proceeded to try and back up his inflated sense of self-importance by saying oh i've survived this many accidents without being injured.

It's like, so what...My cousin recently wrote off his car at 160km/h and he was drunk (single vehicle accident, I hope he's learned his lesson) and he didn't have a single scratch or bruise on him, either...

I find these kind of people funny, the types that think they're hot and can get anyone they want...They're exactly the kind of people I avoid, coz they usually have f*cked up personalities.

I think he does this strictly for attention. A cry for help of some sort. So lets stop with the attention it is worthless. 🙂

"I find these kind of people funny, the types that think they're hot and can get anyone they want...usually have f*cked up personalities"

Very true.

All quiet on this front—? Did we give you too much of a hard time F A M? Or are you too busy servicing the ladies!?!??

HAHAHAHA!!!! cute thread lol!!!

all the scorpio broads i know worship and tight, toned body...

Well, you know many Scorpio men do too haha. Which is a bit of a bummer because I'm curvy, slightly soft bodied girl -- with average proportions ^_^.

lmao @ everyone elses comments hahahahaha

Thats just dirty. I don't think i can dis anybody like that Cuz i don't just wanna do it once i wanna like 5 times then fall asleep cuz u know what they say scorps are known for there stamina in and out the bed.

@ sweethearts:

i AM a prostitute indeed...

a prostitute for LOVE!

most people sell themselves when you think about it...an overwhelming majority of people in fact..

i would dare say ALL people are for sale come to think about it, although the currency with which people sell themselves differs from person to person..

some people sell themselves for money, others for spiritual enlightenment, others for material objects, and people like me sell themselves for LOVE...


love is the only currency that means anything to me....

and regardless of how i may appear, i am well aware that when someone is selling him/herself whether it be for money, love or whatever, that person is inherently making a SACRIFICE with the intention of gaining something of value in return...


its quite simple really...


and how do you know if you are my "type" or not?

you are not e-ffended by me, are you?


as a big budapest bear with bad balls and back hair and NO back-bone named SHIT-ake is fond of saying, "its only an internetS message board"....



@ oddball:

thank you for your thoughtful response..

you bring up some very good points..

these "others" who you speak of whom i am "talking cheaply of and towards others" have had their names with-held by me...you don't even know MY name for crying out loud!

why does it matter to you?

as far as some people on this board are concerned, this shit is all made up anyways! (its all quite true...i have a vivid imagination indeed, but some of you really give me too much credit..)


even if it is made up as some of you say, i find it quite funny myself, so if you will have a laugh and lighten up, then please feel free to do so and stop taking everything you read on an internetS message board so seriously...

either way, its NOT that serious!


and you speak of people having "their guardians"...

very true..

but who is guarding you? the forces of good or the forces of evil?


i have seen my guardians and they have penetrated me...and i have so many guardians, i cannot even count them all...an army of guardians is what i have seen and experienced with my own senses on many occasions during my astral journeys..

this is a completely different topic, but i WILL say this, my heart is SPOTLESS and i know this for a FACT..my intentions are PURE and my position in the Universe is that of an Anointed One...

say what you will, good or bad..it doesn't change the fact...

what you say about the ego is also valid if i may say so myself...

but in my astral journeys i have realized this:

in order to NOT get locked away in an insane asylum and get branded for life as a severely ill mental patient for life, it is BEST to face the fact that although we are spiritual beings, we exist for now in the temporal state of the world and material things...

there is a reason why each and every one of us is here..do you know the reason YOU are here?

we all have a purpose here on earth and the WISE ones among us become aware what their duty is here in this life and FULFILL it...

so an ego is a VITAL and PRIMARY necessity for any person living on earth in human form...

if you completely lack ego, just go and kill yourself because its basically the same thing anyway..


@ queenscorpio:

come on now, baby doll...

EVERYONE needs a little attention now, don't we all?


@ emeralgem:

lol...

join the club..

you are not the first or even the 10th person here to accuse me of having a little dick or being sexually inadequate..

i am sure you won't be the last...

but i must reiterate for posterity's sake that i only APPEAR to be sexually inadequate to do my VIRGO RISING..

i mean, its not like i have a SUN in vigro or anything like that! then you would REALLY be telling the truth!


@ stingerbaby:

what is all this talk about "gunshots" and senseless violence?

my little water sibling, i would advise you to reference my thread entitled, "Scorpio vs. Pisces: Who Really Has the Edge" on the pisces board if you havent already...

READ CAREFULLY because there i explain exactly WHY a pisces will ALWAYS outmatch a scorpio in anything of REAL value...

and just like a cowardly scorpio to throw a sucker punch and then say he doesn't want to fight anymore...

what bitches you all are..


@ sweethearts:

you all could NEVER give me a problem because i don't let all this internetS message board bs bother me!

i just come here to vent and have FUN like i am MENTAL...

its just that i keep getting such rave reviews and i like to respond to everyone who takes the time to respond to me! and with all the reviews, it can take time to answer everyone!


i would have no life if i couldn't manage my time between my e-life and real life as i am...

and of course i have been "servicing the ladies"...

its fundamental at your service! couldn't you tell?

but i am an exclusive dealership..

i only

@ cappysweetie:

*waves*

how ya been?

long time no e-see!

@ k-scorp:

you are definitely on the scorpio board, but what thread are you in right now?

"and people like me sell themselves for LOVE..."

"love is the only currency that means anything to me...."

TOTAL contradiction to what you've been saying all along F A M...DO you even understand the meaning/feeling of the word?

TREETRUNKING lonely hot women the first time you take them home is that LOVE?!?!?
Or is that your currency and what you get "off on" the fact that you have all these women that are "IN LOVE" with you? Does that make you feel like THE MAN?

Loads of empty mindless sex...great for a while huh? But after a while you've already realized that you're just LONELY & BORED with it all and that's why you are here looking for something/someone else more exciting.

you are not e-ffended by me, are you?

You don't e-ffect or e-ffend me at all, just a bit of scribble on this thread which provides me with light entertainment when I'm bored...

untterly classic material, if i do say so myself..

hmm.. really a talker? I rarely talk after the deed, I typically go eat and expect them to be gone by the time I am done with my food unless of course it's a relationship, then I will most likely feed them too and go downstairs while they sleep. I haven't seen a talker, I am kind of curious now ha was it just random "sharing" or like a critique