Help! My mother is a Scorpio!

My mother has her sun, mercury, venus, rising and mars in Scorpio. Her moon is in Pisces.
Anyways, we have always had a strange relationship,very close yet with battles like you wouldn't believe..
She is negative, jealous, domineering, you name it. But I love her with all my heart and respect her and
am over protective of her to the end...
Just curious to hear from others who have Scorpio moms as well. How do you cope with your mother? Have you
picked up on some of her traits as well? I find myself being very critical of others, reclusive, jealous, domineering
myself...
My sun is in Libra, moon in Leo, Scorpio Rising, born on the Libra / Scorp. Cusp, mars in Leo

Well, I just wanted to see what others with Scorpio mothers had to say. I'm curious to read if they've also had it a bit tough. I love my mother with all the problems we have had, but I remember always wishing when I was little that my mom would stop being so hard and open up more to me.

The unloading her feelings on me makes sense. I can still remember how she could be at one moment telling me how much she hated so and so and then the next be all "happy" to hear from them when they'd call.

My jealous, critical and negative side don't really describe the Libra traits... I'm supposed to be mega social, talkative and emotionally detached. None of those traits apply to me.

I've never had the heart to tell my other how she hurts my feelings at times, because I'm so scared to hurt her or piss her off. Is it wise to open up to her and tell her about how I feel?

mother*, of course

Lib/Scorp cusp? Scorp Rising, moon and mars in fixed signs will kill off any Libra traits in my opinion.

🙂 Just to give you an example of how hurt and confused I am by her, when I was pregnant with my oldest son, she took me aside and told me angrily that I was not to expect her to take care of him all the time, that she would not be my nanny. I had never asked her to be or intended to ask her to. I ended up moving to Sweden with my child's father, because its a great country to raise kids in, and she broke down to my dad, crying and saying that I had taken away her grandchild from her because I don't love her....I was crushed by this and confused..?

mostly to release all of my hard feelings

And you'll just probably feel worse after you air it all out anyway

Posted by SheDevil4u
Damn! I feel so sorry for you. I have experienced a few scorpio women in my day and I HATED them ALL!!! Especially my ex bosses who were scorpios. They were the most vindictive, lying, manipulative, assholes on the planet. I HATE scorpio women! Sorry... I had to vent when i saw this post....

🙂

Arn't you the Cancer who tried to trap some Sag guy by telling him that you were pregnant, then after you *lost* the baby he bailed like his ass was on fire?

lol

Posted by IntriguedScorp

Posted by LitaLupe81
🙂 she took me aside and told me angrily that I was not to expect her to take care of him all the time, that she would not be my nanny.

I can see how that might hurt...but in a way its honest and straightforward. :/

Stop being so hard on yourself and your mother. 🙂

click to expand

Yes... this may be straightforward... but it is not honest because the mother turns it around, cries and plays the victim when the daughter BELIEVES her mother, doesn't ask for help and moves.

My mom did the same exact thing to me... (Scorpio Moon) Then she complains to other family members that I don't include her in my kids lives. Then I call my mom, ask her if she'd like to see the children... and she is always too busy.

@LitaLupe81... your mother is your mother. She's not going to change, even if you talk to her. I doubt you'll feel better after cause it might just open a big-ol-can of worms. Accept her for who she is... (whether you like it or not)

Posted by LitaLupe81
My mother has her sun, mercury, venus, rising and mars in Scorpio. Her moon is in Pisces.
Anyways, we have always had a strange relationship,very close yet with battles like you wouldn't believe..
She is negative, jealous, domineering, you name it. But I love her with all my heart and respect her and
am over protective of her to the end...
Just curious to hear from others who have Scorpio moms as well. How do you cope with your mother? Have you
picked up on some of her traits as well? I find myself being very critical of others, reclusive, jealous, domineering
myself...
My sun is in Libra, moon in Leo, Scorpio Rising, born on the Libra / Scorp. Cusp, mars in Leo

long term lurker first time poster. And I had to post when I saw this thread. Lita I really do feel for you, having a mother who, from what you are saying, was far from "ideal". Give yourself credit, a whole lotta credit, for still being able to lover her and accept her. And inspite of what others may have said its useful to talk about your feelings about her. If nothing it will help you "see" and gain perspective. I know you wanted to hear from other people who had Scorpio mothers abt their experiences. I havnt got that to offer. Had a libra mother who I adored and idealised and miss now that shes gone. But my experience with my Leo dad wasnt great to say the least.

Its true that parents are human beings and so can be flawed. There will be situations where every parent messes up. But, i think if on the whole if as a parent you put your child and their happiness and well being first and above other "selfish" concerns say even 60 percent of the time then you can expect your child to hopefully understand/forgive when you do mess up. At least that's my experience. Frankly, if one can't be unselfish with ones own child, then please don't have children lol.

I think use your own difficult experience with your mother to at least TRY and be the best mother you can be to your own children. That way you break the circle and heal. It will be hard too because parental tapes keep playing in our minds and we often just reproduce that learned behaviour. And also, for yourself to heal, forgive your mother for past hurts. Offer her acceptance and love if you can, but focus on yourself now. If you are in a loving happy place yourself, it will come easier.

Take care

You should talk to her about how you feel. Be completely honest.

Don't expect her to change, though. I guarantee she will rationalize everything she ever did/does (fixed sign Scorpios, in my experience, will NEVER admit to being wrong; they'll just apologize for how YOU interpreted their actions).

Still, let it out (calmly) and you will feel better. Don't let her turn it around on you; if she starts to, walk away.

The thing that perturbs me the most is that I have a younger brother, 28 years old, that is Autistic and she goes after him for money all the time to finance her gambling problem. I've confronted her once and all hell broke loose...so since then, I haven't brought it up.... She doesn't see it as a problem though, and has put my brother in financial straits at times because of her problem. She use to go after me for money when I lived by her, while working a minimum paid job ,trying to support my little son and myself, too.. She pulls the crying card and then the yelling card when I wouldn't give in..and we're talking a lot of money here, not $ 5 bucks here and there.

btw, my dad is a leo and their relationship has been a stormy one, to say the least. He has put it on me to confront my mom about her gambling problem because he doesn't want to. He says that it will get ugly and probably end up with him leaving her...can you imagine the stress that put me under? I told him I wouldn't do it and that it was unfair for him to ask that of me...

Wow... I really dont like your mother. And your father seems like a coward. In my book, if your relationship can end over a single fight, whatever the topic, you shouldn't be in that relationship.

I'm sorry you have to deal with that. We all have our crosses to bear, though, and I'm sure you know better than anyone here how to handle her.

My mother is a Capricorn, so I can't offer any insight from personal experience on how to deal with a Scorpio mom.

Best of luck!

Well, I don't see it as bashing. I see it more as venting and wanting to hear from others if they've had similar experiences with a Scorpio mother. Like I stated before, I love her. Just don't understand some of her actions.

She's not bashing her mom, she's just being honest and stating facts.

ZenBear, I also feel like what my dad did was cowardly and can never fathom how he thought it okay to even ask his child to get in the middle of his own personal problems with my mother. It's so hard seeing her in her denial, I just want her to stop and to learn to be genuinely happy. When I hug her and tell her I love her so much, at times she just smiles or she'll say that I don't love her enough...it kills me. She is soon 70 years old and all I want her to be is happy, not in misery...

I know I'm not an extension of her, it's just so hard to detach myself entirely from her...

Thanks for your response Sunrays 🙂 Totally makes sense to start inside out..never thought of it that way, was always very defensive. I have a problem allowing myself to cry in front of her at times because I feel like I want to be strong for her...not sure why, she's never asked me to be..

Posted by LitaLupe81
ZenBear, I also feel like what my dad did was cowardly and can never fathom how he thought it okay to even ask his child to get in the middle of his own personal problems with my mother. It's so hard seeing her in her denial, I just want her to stop and to learn to be genuinely happy. When I hug her and tell her I love her so much, at times she just smiles or she'll say that I don't love her enough...it kills me. She is soon 70 years old and all I want her to be is happy, not in misery...

Hi lita, people here still seem to be giving you a hard time. Bad/difficult mother experiences may have common threads but cant possibly be exactly the same for everyone. you have only stated facts as you see them, openly and honestly, not ranted against anyone or anything like that. so i dont see why people here are accusing you of projecting grievances or even seeing yourself as an extension of your mother. Well that's probably their perception based on their own mother experiences.

Since you are looking at astrology to explore your 'mother' experience, I would say look at your own birthchart to get more insight about why your mother/father experience has been the way it has. Create a chart on astro.com and then look at your fourth and tenth houses. The rulers of those houses and the planets there will be tell you a lot about your parents. For women, house 10 is supposed to represent mother and house 4 father. This link tells you a bit more http://therealastrology.com/ask-kevin/general-interpretation/20-parents-in-the-natal-chart.html<BR>

But ultimately knowledge in itself is useless. Use it to make a difference to your own life. You are NOT responsible for poor decisions made by your parents and you are not responsible for sorting out the mess they have made in their own lives.

In life we gave 2 choices, to accept people as they are or not deal with them at all. Since the latter is not possible try to come to terms with the former.

All those Scorp placements.... your scales would never be the same. Stand down.

Posted by Wynter

Posted by SheDevil4u
Damn! I feel so sorry for you. I have experienced a few scorpio women in my day and I HATED them ALL!!! Especially my ex bosses who were scorpios. They were the most vindictive, lying, manipulative, assholes on the planet. I HATE scorpio women! Sorry... I had to vent when i saw this post....

🙂

Arn't you the Cancer who tried to trap some Sag guy by telling him that you were pregnant, then after you *lost* the baby he bailed like his ass was on fire?

lol

click to expand

Typical scorpio response. You all need to get over yourselves, seriously. Shes 100% right. Scorpio women and men are bad news, and thats putting it mildly.

Lita, i feel for you. Being a sweet peaceful libra and dealing with vindictive scorpio mother must be hard and only a true trooper could deal with it. At the end of the day she is your mother and you need to respect her but you must keep your distance if you want to mantain a stable relationship with her. Scorpios are thick headed and they could kill someone and still think they didn't do anything wrong. So my advice to you is to just keep your distances but always love and respect her as your mother.