Sagittarius freaking out over Scorpio Break

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Mandapants
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I'm a Sagittarius sun/Taurus moon women and I've been dating a Scorpio guy for 2 months. In typical scorpio fashion he was hounding me non-stop before we starting dating when I wasn't interested in him and didn't really give him the time of day. Now I'm extremely emotionally invested and he pulls away from me often. We we seeing each other once a week at best and almost every week he would make plans with me on the weekend and cancel them the day of the plans. He did this to me on Sunday for what must have been the 10th time and I told him that I didn't like how he was making me feel and I thought I needed a break from him. He told me it wasn't me it was him because of his financial problems and other problems "that I don't even realize" how bad they are and that when I was ready I could come back to him, no hard feelings. I told him I though it would be best if he came to me when he has the time for me. He told me good look and he'd talk to me later. It's been a week and I miss him so much, I sent him a message telling him I miss him and I wish he could be more open with me about what was going on with him. That was last night and I haven't heard from him. He's told me before that he loves me and when things get better in his life he has all these plans to spend time with me, but I have no idea if all of this is bull and he's just stringing me along. I care about him so much and I show it with my words and actions, but I feel like he's almost all words and I can't handle that. I need reassurance that he still wants to be with me. I guess what I'm asking is this just a scorpio retreat and if he feels the way he says he feels he'll come back, or do you think he will just stay away for good?
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tiki33
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"He told me it wasn't me it was him because of his financial problems and other problems "that I don't even realize" how bad they are and that when I was ready I could come back to him, no hard feelings. "

Why do so many men use the same tired lines, it's work, it's money, I'm depressed, my dog died, my mom didn't hug me yeeesh so lame but I'm sure he was having these issues when he was chasing you, don't believe that lie.

Yes he's stringing you along...

Emotionally invested after 2 months? Boring

Go back to treating him like shit and you'll see a significant difference.
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Mandapants
@Mandapants
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Posted by tiki33
"He told me it wasn't me it was him because of his financial problems and other problems "that I don't even realize" how bad they are and that when I was ready I could come back to him, no hard feelings. "

Why do so many men use the same tired lines, it's work, it's money, I'm depressed, my dog died, my mom didn't hug me yeeesh so lame but I'm sure he was having these issues when he was chasing you, don't believe that lie.

Yes he's stringing you along...

Emotionally invested after 2 months? Boring

Go back to treating him like shit and you'll see a significant difference.




Thanks, I literally used to ignore him for months at a time and he would still hit me up and tell me how badly he wanted to be with me. I guess I gotta go back to that...
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TaurusBull1977
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I will have to concur with the OP. My ex was a Scorpio...when their "money is funny"...be prepared for drama, an emotional meltdown, moods, and someone who may prove to be extremely complicated to live with.

He may actually be sparing her the melodrama.

I wish my ex would have done the same. Instead, he opted to hold on, and just made the both of us miserable in the relationship.

He was actually a pretty decent guy...unfortunately the circumstances were not so decent.
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nov13thscorp
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Posted by tiki33
"He told me it wasn't me it was him because of his financial problems and other problems "that I don't even realize" how bad they are and that when I was ready I could come back to him, no hard feelings. "

Why do so many men use the same tired lines, it's work, it's money, I'm depressed, my dog died, my mom didn't hug me yeeesh so lame but I'm sure he was having these issues when he was chasing you, don't believe that lie.

Yes he's stringing you along...

Emotionally invested after 2 months? Boring

Go back to treating him like shit and you'll see a significant difference.



Good point being made here...I do the same thing this scorp guy does..I LOVE the chase, but once she gives in it literally kills all the lust I had for her until she tells me to go F off then im all over her again hehehe
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TaurusBull1977
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Posted by Mandapants


then maybe somewhere down the line I'll hear from him but I know I can't be making things better by getting mad because he's retreating and flaking.



He's retreating and flaking because this is an inopportune time for him to be in a relationship. There is nothing to psychoanalyze really, he's telling you some real shit.

Nothing abstract. Nothing sugar-coated.

Let it go.
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nov13thscorp
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Posted by Mandapants
Posted by TaurusBull1977
Posted by Mandapants
He's told me before that he loves me and when things get better in his life he has all these plans to spend time with me,



^^^^Believe this ^^^^^^^



then maybe somewhere down the line I'll hear from him but I know I can't be making things better by getting mad because he's retreating and flaking.
click to expand




yikes, I missed this part, sorry, lol that could be true also...goddamn im so complicated but yeah that could make things difficult for me also: tryin to make a girl my girlfriend AND trying to get my life together...Its one or the other, most likely getting things in my life in order being 1st but it cant be both
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Andalusia
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Posted by TaurusBull1977
Posted by Mandapants
He's told me before that he loves me and when things get better in his life he has all these plans to spend time with me,



^^^^Believe this ^^^^^^^
click to expand




idk.. My ex told me a version of this when we broke up.

Yet he's been dating someone else since the Spring, and it seems pretty legit. Some recently separated woman with two small children.

Though mutual friends do occasionally tell me he asked them to tell me "hi" and shit. Which is obnoxious and makes me confused and angry.
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Mandapants
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Posted by Rabbit
Posted by lualibra
I can't help but feel that if this were a fire or air sign she were dating there'd be a lot more comments about how he's just flakey and stringing her along instead of trying to get his shit together for her benefit before entering a relationship. If he's not ready, why pursue her to begin with?



Agree.

There is, however, the question of how serious the relationship is.

If we are talking about "dating"...taking some time away to straighten shit out isn't a big deal. Dating doesn't imply exclusivity or obligation.

If we are talking being in a committed or even semi committed relationship...that changes things. You can't just leave because things get tough. You have an obligation to that other person and that person's feelings as well. Part of being in a mature committed relationship is being there for one another in tough times.
click to expand




We were dating. Neither of us came out and said that we were seeing each other exclusively. He also made it a point to not show up for anything regarding Christmas because that was too serious for him.
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TaurusBull1977
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Posted by lualibra
I can't help but feel that if this were a fire or air sign she were dating there'd be a lot more comments about how he's just flakey and stringing her along instead of trying to get his shit together for her benefit before entering a relationship. If he's not ready, why pursue her to begin with?



Because he's a water sign...and FIXED.

Flakiness occurs only when there is uncertainty. With Scorps, it's all or nothing.

He didn't mislead her. He told her some real shit.

Air signs take more of an unorthodox approach to love, and leave things to chance. Scorpios take this matter VERY seriously!

Have you ever been in a relationship with a Scorp?

I was in a relationship with one for three years.

As I stated, they're (Water;Emotional) and (Fixed;Consistent).

The emotional attachment is still present (fixed)... but his finances are not.

My ex didn't get himself together before we got together. It was very challenging.

The finances wasn't an issue for me. But for him, it mattered tremendously...and therefore took a toll on our relationship.

We're still friends, but a reconciliation? That would never happen...
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TaurusBull1977
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Posted by IrresistableScorp
Scorpions get their shit together before diving head first into a full blown relationship. I've seen it a million times on this board.

Stick around or don't. If you are on his mind he will come back. Probably with a vengeance. If he's full of it, you won't hear from him again.



I still think this is the best advice ^^^^^^^

The OP should simply leave it alone.....
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LetltB
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:08:10 PM Quote | IP
Posted by Mandapants
I've been talking to a Scorpio man on and off for over a year now after we met online. Long story short he found me on Instagram and googled me to find my Facebook and blog and pursued me from there. We went on one dinner date and he told me about the googling and all the stuff he discovered about me. It honestly kinda freaked me out because of how aggressive he was in learning about me and went on and on about how perfect I am for him but not so much on how we got along together. After the date I backed off from talking to him and only texted him off and on for a few months then stopped talking all together for about 6 months. We recently starting talking again and I'm worried with what I know about scorpios and revenge that if I try again to date him he'll be resentful about me not talking to him for a while. I like him and he's funny and seems like someone I want to get to know more if he can get ease up on the stalking and aggressiveness ( he told me on the first date he wants to meet my parents!). I just want some advice on how to go about this and if it's common for a Scorpio to I guess "forgive" me for disappearing on him. I'm a Sagittarius sun, Taurus moon if that helps. Thanks!




Eleven days prior: VIRGO
10/31/2013 1:45:09 PM Quote | IP
Posted by Mandapants
Well love triangle is a little dramatic but it feels that way since me and this chick are the only women in our 20s at the office and he is asking both of us out. I'm just curious about why he would bring up going out with me on at least 4 different occasions but never set a date when he has already taken this chick out. It feels like an ego boost thing to me. Or why would he tell me about his date? To see if I get jealous? I didn't wanna seem like I was hurt over him not hanging out with me so I told him I hope he has fun. Idk I'm just not sure how to go about this. I feel like now that I know he's gone out with her ill look dumb if I try to hang out with him cuz I'm not sure if he's into me or just wants attention from multiple chicks
click to expand


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Mandapants
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Posted by LetltB
My advice...and since you can't get your stories straight..STAY AWAY FROM SCORPIOS!



stories straight? didn't you see that one post was about a Scorpio (the guy I'm talking about here) and the other post was about a Virgo, a guy I used to work with. The scenarios were happening at the same time but still 2 different conflicts. Shortly after I posted the scorpio post I went on a date with him and here we are. Jeez...
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LetltB
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Posted by Mandapants

I've been dating a Scorpio guy for 2 months.

He did this to me on Sunday for what must have been the 10th time

He's told me before that he loves me

I need reassurance that he still wants to be with me. I guess what I'm asking is this just a scorpio retreat and if he feels the way he says he feels he'll come back, or do you think he will just stay away for good?



Here's your reassurance. Most Scorpios who love someone DO NOT treat the person they love this way. Hell, men in general who are in love with a woman wouldn't do this. Anyone who tells you they love you after a few dates in two short months yet blows you off repeatedly is in selective sex mode. When he has a dry run, he'll call you. Are you 21 yet?
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GeminiStellium
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Posted by Mandapants
I'm a Sagittarius sun/Taurus moon women and I've been dating a Scorpio guy for 2 months.
I sent him a message telling him I miss him and I wish he could be more open with me about what was going on with hi

He's told me before that he loves me and
I need reassurance that he still wants to be with me.



In love.. reassurance.. after only two months?

Pathetic.. what are you, guys, high-school douchebags?
You don't need to be scorpio to run away from so much immaturity.
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TaurusBull1977
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her to put up with this behavior. I simply told her to leave it alone. Remember, these were her words not ours. And yes, most Scorps do NOT fair well in courtships when their finances are NOT in order. The advice was given according to what the Scorpion told her. Whether it's true or not, who knows. But regardless of what his true intentions were, the responses were still the same. Leave it alone. IrresistableScorp offered the best advice.

As for the OP's side game playing flings, she may have planted a seed in his head. (I didn't know about her previous threads). So he may just be 'mirroring' her actions. (Very Scorp-like) Lualibra, try to see things from more of an astrological abstract point of view.

Posted by TaurusBull1977
Posted by IrresistableScorp
Scorpions get their shit together before diving head first into a full blown relationship. I've seen it a million times on this board.

Stick around or don't. If you are on his mind he will come back. Probably with a vengeance. If he's full of it, you won't hear from him again.



I still think this is the best advice ^^^^^^^

The OP should simply leave it alone.....
click to expand


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Mandapants
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Posted by GeminiStellium
Posted by Mandapants
I'm a Sagittarius sun/Taurus moon women and I've been dating a Scorpio guy for 2 months.
I sent him a message telling him I miss him and I wish he could be more open with me about what was going on with hi

He's told me before that he loves me and
I need reassurance that he still wants to be with me.



In love.. reassurance.. after only two months?

Pathetic.. what are you, guys, high-school douchebags?
You don't need to be scorpio to run away from so much immaturity.
click to expand





I've known him for a year and a half, we've dated for 2 months, I'm 25 he's 35. I'm leaving it alone, thanks.
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lisabeth
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Posted by TaurusBull1977
I have witnessed many men of the zodiac 'demonized' on this site according to how most women feel the fairy-tale should play out.

Human beings are complex. People have different personalities, and respond differently to certain situations.



it's weird. I've never known so many "players" running around demonizing women of all zodiac signs everywhere. Where are they finding them? O_O
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CreoleGeisha
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Posted by Mandapants


I need reassurance that he still wants to be with me. I guess what I'm asking is this just a scorpio retreat and if he feels the way he says he feels he'll come back, or do you think he will just stay away for good?



Regardless of what his intentions are, you will be happiest if you accept responsibility for your happiness. Maybe he'll be back, maybe he won't, why arrange your life and happiness around "maybe" ?

Give him AND YOU some space. Meet other people, do other things, go on with building the life you want. If he returns and you're still interested, go for it. If not, no big loss.
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Aine
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Posted by IrresistableScorp
Scorpions get their shit together before diving head first into a full blown relationship. I've seen it a million times on this board.

Stick around or don't. If you are on his mind he will come back. Probably with a vengeance. If he's full of it, you won't hear from him again.



truth.

"sticking around" doesnt have to mean you literally sticking around and waiting.. do your own thing... you'll hear from him if he really loves you.

it may seem selfish but sometimes you meet the right person at the wrong time... it can become the right time if you give it the amount of time it needs... in the mean time... do your thing and let him do his.

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Andalusia
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Posted by IrresistableScorp
Posted by Andalusia
Posted by TaurusBull1977
Posted by Mandapants
He's told me before that he loves me and when things get better in his life he has all these plans to spend time with me,



^^^^Believe this ^^^^^^^



idk.. My ex told me a version of this when we broke up.

Yet he's been dating someone else since the Spring, and it seems pretty legit. Some recently separated woman with two small children.

Though mutual friends do occasionally tell me he asked them to tell me "hi" and shit. Which is obnoxious and makes me confused and angry.



Melly I love you but you broke up with scorp first time right? That right there is a recipe for hot and cold, in and out, mind fuck extraordinaire. No it's not fair. And yes it sucks. However if you (in general) broke up just get a reaction or because you didn't understand something or whatever, you will have ripped a whole in the trust tapestry with scorp that will then need mending. Best to stick it out to the bitter end and really examine the ACTIONS of scorp overall.

Just saying. Not to drudge up the past but maybe to shed some light. 🙂
click to expand




😢 I know. And I love you too, Pineapples, and appreciate your insight.

I really didn't break up to get a reaction or anything. I really did (and do) think it was the best, even though I love him. But love doesn't always equal being "good together" or good together right now, ya know? We met in this lifetime before our souls were ready for eachother, and I felt that staying together before we were ready would have only bread resentment. I told him all this before the first break up, and thought we were on the same page..

But then he wouldn't give up so I ended up giving in to my emotions at the expense of my reason, and I suppose now this just made me seem unstable. :/
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Mandapants
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In case anyone was wondering how this panned out, I decided to call him today since I have no will power. We played basic catch up on how the other was doing, he tried to make it clear that he was busy with work and "being good." I talked about work and family and nothing about whether or not I have been seeing anyone. After we got off the phone we were texting and he brought up Valentines day out of nowhere, telling me he hopes I have fun with whoever I spend it with. I told him I miss him and though I know he is not in a place where our relationship can work I still want to be there for him if he needs me. His response?
"No lie...I still wanna have sex." So basically he just wants to be my fuck buddy with no strings attached. I was furious at first then became indifferent. I have no intentions of seeing him again but I agreed to his proposal so he wouldn't get the satisfaction of knowing I was upset. He said, " you're sure, all cards on the table and you're ok with this?" I said yes. He said "ok, you want to call me and chat?" I told him not really. Then he text me telling me that he DID miss the sound of my voice. I did not respond. Then he text me again with a picture of his boxers saying thinking of me was turning him on, again I didn't respond and he hadn't sent anything after that. I'm now officially over it. What a mess.
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LetltB
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Posted by MandapantsI have no intentions of seeing him again but I agreed to his proposal so he wouldn't get the satisfaction of knowing I was upset. He said, " you're sure, all cards on the table and you're ok with this?" I said yes. He said "ok, you want to call me and chat?" I told him not really. Then he text me telling me that he DID miss the sound of my voice. I did not respond. Then he text me again with a picture of his boxers saying thinking of me was turning him on, again I didn't respond and he hadn't sent anything after that. I'm now officially over it. What a mess.




So because this guy was up front from the beginning that your mind could not grasp, you feel entitled to play head games? He's an asshole because you're dense? ok..got it.

$ 100.00 he figures this out, and we see another thread that he's changed and wants a relationship?
Another $ 100.00 he goes silent after making her believe him. The mirror is a weapon I tell ya.
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CreoleGeisha
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Posted by Mandapants
In case anyone was wondering how this panned out, I decided to call him today since I have no will power. We played basic catch up on how the other was doing, he tried to make it clear that he was busy with work and "being good." I talked about work and family and nothing about whether or not I have been seeing anyone. After we got off the phone we were texting and he brought up Valentines day out of nowhere, telling me he hopes I have fun with whoever I spend it with. I told him I miss him and though I know he is not in a place where our relationship can work I still want to be there for him if he needs me. His response?
"No lie...I still wanna have sex." So basically he just wants to be my fuck buddy with no strings attached. I was furious at first then became indifferent. I have no intentions of seeing him again but I agreed to his proposal so he wouldn't get the satisfaction of knowing I was upset. He said, " you're sure, all cards on the table and you're ok with this?" I said yes. He said "ok, you want to call me and chat?" I told him not really. Then he text me telling me that he DID miss the sound of my voice. I did not respond. Then he text me again with a picture of his boxers saying thinking of me was turning him on, again I didn't respond and he hadn't sent anything after that. I'm now officially over it. What a mess.



This isn't the right person for you. Move along and live well. That's the most important thing.
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MrFirebird
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Posted by LetltB
Posted by MandapantsI have no intentions of seeing him again but I agreed to his proposal so he wouldn't get the satisfaction of knowing I was upset. He said, " you're sure, all cards on the table and you're ok with this?" I said yes. He said "ok, you want to call me and chat?" I told him not really. Then he text me telling me that he DID miss the sound of my voice. I did not respond. Then he text me again with a picture of his boxers saying thinking of me was turning him on, again I didn't respond and he hadn't sent anything after that. I'm now officially over it. What a mess.




So because this guy was up front from the beginning that your mind could not grasp, you feel entitled to play head games? He's an asshole because you're dense? ok..got it.

$ 100.00 he figures this out, and we see another thread that he's changed and wants a relationship?
Another $ 100.00 he goes silent after making her believe him. The mirror is a weapon I tell ya.
click to expand




Remember, Sagittarian commitments are legendary. Scorpio's passion are legendary, also.

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MrFirebird
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Posted by LetltB
..lol fb..exactly!



I have to admit I feel that way whenever I see someone yakin' on their cell phone while driving.
In the drive thru at the Micky Ds - customer ahead of me takes 5 minutes to order, and yakin'
on the phone. (I always know what I want in advance.) I place my order and out of there.
Leave Mickey Ds, and wouldn't you know it? I am a couple of cars behind this same woman again!
Sitting at the light, in the left turn lane, light turns green. Same yak-yak holds up the line.
I hit the horn, she makes her u-turn and I see her STILL on the phone! First time, in a long time, I went ballistic and yelled at her like an NY Cabbie. I felt like getting out of the car and walking
up and tossin' her phone like the guy on the ski lift.
They call it road rage..... gee.... I wonder why?


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scalpisces
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Posted by LetltB
Posted by MandapantsI have no intentions of seeing him again but I agreed to his proposal so he wouldn't get the satisfaction of knowing I was upset. He said, " you're sure, all cards on the table and you're ok with this?" I said yes. He said "ok, you want to call me and chat?" I told him not really. Then he text me telling me that he DID miss the sound of my voice. I did not respond. Then he text me again with a picture of his boxers saying thinking of me was turning him on, again I didn't respond and he hadn't sent anything after that. I'm now officially over it. What a mess.




So because this guy was up front from the beginning that your mind could not grasp, you feel entitled to play head games? He's an asshole because you're dense? ok..got it.

$ 100.00 he figures this out, and we see another thread that he's changed and wants a relationship?
Another $ 100.00 he goes silent after making her believe him. The mirror is a weapon I tell ya.
click to expand




I hope not every scorp is like this.
A decent person would recognize that she was hurt by his proposal.
So, LetItBe, just so I understand this kind of behavior,
He breaks her heart + makes an outrageous suggestion which reduces to a free whore and THEN he feels butthurt and comes back for revenge?
I doubt all scorps are like that - but just in case they are, I will stay the hell away from them!!!
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MrFirebird
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Posted by scalpisces
Posted by LetltB
Posted by MandapantsI have no intentions of seeing him again but I agreed to his proposal so he wouldn't get the satisfaction of knowing I was upset. He said, " you're sure, all cards on the table and you're ok with this?" I said yes. He said "ok, you want to call me and chat?" I told him not really. Then he text me telling me that he DID miss the sound of my voice. I did not respond. Then he text me again with a picture of his boxers saying thinking of me was turning him on, again I didn't respond and he hadn't sent anything after that. I'm now officially over it. What a mess.




So because this guy was up front from the beginning that your mind could not grasp, you feel entitled to play head games? He's an asshole because you're dense? ok..got it.

$ 100.00 he figures this out, and we see another thread that he's changed and wants a relationship?
Another $ 100.00 he goes silent after making her believe him. The mirror is a weapon I tell ya.



I hope not every scorp is like this.
A decent person would recognize that she was hurt by his proposal.
So, LetItBe, just so I understand this kind of behavior,
He breaks her heart + makes an outrageous suggestion which reduces to a free whore and THEN he feels butthurt and comes back for revenge?
I doubt all scorps are like that - but just in case they are, I will stay the hell away from them!!!
click to expand




Scalp, re-read what Mandapants said, and then re-read what LIB answered,
I understood her remark as an attempt to get Mandapants to look at herself in the mirror.


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scalpisces
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Now what LIB said was that the scorp will mirror her "game" - but of course, that her indifference and so called "mind game" was a self defense mechanism.
So he is going to mirror what "hurt" him, completely forgetting that the reason she hurt him was because she was hurt by him.
If this is going to happen like that, he should take a good honest look into the mirror himself.
You don't propose "just sex" to a woman that wants a relationship with you and has feelings for you, unless you dont mind being a jerk, of course.
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