Serious Self Issues ......

In human behaviour, our biggest obstacles to overcome are ones to which are present in ourselves, however, we are blind to them and believe it's the people around us who are guilty .. and from this blind-obstacle of our self's issue, we react/respond to other people accordingly .. we LOOK for this other person to possess the quality in which we erroneously believe the other possess. For instance ..

The Virgo is very leary of fakers .. when in reality, they themselves reflect back to people the other person's persona. They will become their partners ... likes, attitudes, opinions.

The Pisces is very awareness oriented and will continuously preach to others about what is actually present in reality ... when in reality, they themselves live in constant state of flux within realities that are based off of fantasy .. illusion.

But, this thread is about Scorpio, and their huge issue in which they own themselves ... yet are unaware that this is actually their own problem in which to conquer.

Trust .....

Scorpios aren't discerning in who they trust, yet, they think they are .. they will believe that every acquaintance has their back, will stand loyally to protect them ... even someone to whom they just met, they erroneously believe this person is thier "friend" .. that is until this other person gives them reason to not trust them.

And this is faulty ... it's not the other person to whom can't be trusted .. it's the Scorpio who gave trust that the other person is suppose to be loyal to them. Out of all the people you know, probably only 5% will actually be a "friend". Friends are NOT acquaintances, and acquaintances won't be loyal to you.

Because the Scorpio is too trusting that others will be loyal to them and present this across the board to every person they meet, as thought this other person should be bound to them .. then it's the Scorpio who has the problem with trust .. another person to whom you barely even really know has no obligation to you .... yet, if they don't display a attitude of being blindly loyal to just an acquaintance (you) .. then you feel like they betrayed you.

They didn't betray you ... you betrayed yourself for being so naive in thinking every person you meet should prove to you that you can trust them. It's not up to another person to prove to you that you can trust them ..

... it's up to you use common sense in realizing that very few people in this can actually be trusted.

Wow, so many typos .. change/fix the last sentence


... it's up to you to use common sense in realizing that very few people in this world can actually be trusted in the first place.

I haven't experienced that with the Scorpios I know, PP .. from what I've observed, the Scorpio doesn't know the difference between Friend and Foe until AFTER the alledged 'friend' has turned on them.

There have been so many times I've seen this with my son, it's disturbing. He will stand loyally by someone who is fucked up, and believes whole-heartedly that this person has his back .. has no clue that the other person is a foe .. then he's betrayed, and suddenly, this other person is the one in the wrong because he trusted this other person to be as loyal to him and he was to them ... eventhough there were signs all over the wall, in which everybody around him could see, but, he couldn't see it because he can't tell the difference between who is a friend and who is an acquaintance.

Just here on another thread, a Scorpio said that she can't say anything to a person who has hurt her because she has friends in common with this man, and to stand up for herself to this man, might offend all their many friends. That blindness, because she doesn't know what trust means .. look at this in reverse ..

If to be a trusting friend to a Scorpio means to make a stand loyally by them ... then this person must possess the fortitude to actually make a stand against a foe.

Yet, if this Scorpio woman has not the fortitude to make a stand against the man who has hurt her out of "fear" of being offensive, then how can all these other people to whom she thinks are friends .. have faith in her to possess the qualities in which she (Scorpio) expects them to have to stand up?

Think about that ... if you expect another person to have this kind of power, yet, you don't present it when facing opposition because of fear of what kind of an impression you are making ... then how can you actually believe that these other people will respect you enough to be loyal to you?

There's another Scorpio woman in here who is having problems with a marriage, in which her husband is a complete dick-wad, and this husband has proven himself over, and over, and over again that he cannot be trusted and will betray her .... yet, she believes that if she acts a certain way, or does certain things in which to passify him, then he won't betray her and she can trust he will go along with what she has up her sleeve .... that's trusting a person who CANNOT be trusted.

If a Scorpio does not understand what trust means .. then they will continue to be betrayed and think it's the other.

A couple things ...

First, if the above post is too person specific to somebody, then tell me and I'll hide it ... however, the intent was just for example purposes and not meant to be offensive.

Second, don't feel like I'm picking on Scorpios here ... I often go to Virgo and Pisces boards and philosophize about human behavioural traits .. so this is just psycho-analyzing in general, and not intended to target any specific person.

Exactly, FuckinA ... the trust issue is thier own.

"they assume everyone means them harm and usually without good reason or proof, and yet they expect everyone else to trust them"

To understand psychology .. it has to be looked at in reverse because people respond/react to influences .. however, when they react to them, it is presented in contrary to the influences.

The reason why they assume everyone means them harm (without reason) is because they are too trusting of this other person and so will look for potential danger.

"To me it's usually the people that are always questioning other's motives that are the ones with a hidden agenda and that aren't trustworthy."

And I totally disagree with the above .. to question a motive, to question a doctor, to question a reason, to question an excuse .. is looking for the accurate answer in which to respond, it's looking at the whole forest instead of just one tree .. to me it's trying to flush out what is hidden and shedding light on the truth.

To be oblivious to hidden motives .. is blind, and a set-up to fall. People have ulterior motives, most everybody in this world looks out for Number 1, and everything we say or do, is normally centered around our own benefit, this is normal .. however, in so doing, we also alter our perspective to be suitable, and in doing, a hidden agenda is our motive. From my perspective, to find this hidden motive is the answer.

But, then again, I'm a Pisces, so naturally, my biggest issue would be centered around what is real, since reality is an obstacle.

So, to look for a hidden agenda would be a natural trait.

Just like an Aries, for example ... they don't hold themselves accountible to consequences, nor fault in any way ... so they too would likely have your opinion about not trusting a person who would look for hidden motives because this person who looks might find that the Ram was in error.

"a person who is usually assuming someone will do them harm without good reason or proof is to me usually the guilty party themselves."


Right .. and this is the subject matter of this thread.

Our self issues in which we think is another persons problem, is actually our own.

"I'm also still not sure I follow what you mean by saying the reverse is true .."

I can explain how this works, though, likely hard to follow ...

Humans, as well as everything, are influenced by a basic force within the magnetic field .. everything, gravity, electricity, heat .. and us, since we are carbon based .. we are ultimately magnetized by a motion of electrical charges due to atomic interactions with outside forces, which also are charged with electrons (negative) and nuclei (positive). The force of attraction or repulsion varies inversely with the distance squared .. in other words ..

We're magnets !!!!!

So, this constant influence in life that directs everything we do is on the unconscious level .. we have no conscious awareness of this, however we do have awareness that positive/negative exists in the world, we just don't realize how this effects us in our behaviour psychologically.

Positive/negative, is processed in humans as being mental/emotional, respectively (mental is the positive/emotional is the negative influences). A person who is mostly effected by the positive, unconsciously processes on the mental level, while responding/projecting outwardsly that which is negative, emotional.

Positive = mental .. this positive (attraction) influence, projects (repulses) negative responses

Negative = emotional .. negative (repulsion) influence, projects (attracts) positive responses

And Scorpio is a negative .. so is influenced by a negative emotion (people are out to harm them), by responding as a positive mentally (present loyalty & trust) .. a counteraction, to balance .... we behave in reverse to the influential pulls because they are constantly in motion with electric charges of attracting/repelling.

Just like an Aries (a positive), they are subjected with the positive influence so believe they are invincible, mentally they are positive that they cannot fail .. balances thier axis by ... projecting this out by being emotionally oblivious or impervious to consequences (negative response to the positive influence).

A person cannot escape the negative .. it's impossible.

Without it, we don't exist.

Good, I'm glad you're ok with that Latina ... because it was only for example and not meant to hurt your feelings.


One thing I find really intriguing about these magnetic forces, is how they attract to outside forces to balance their axis .. and yet, on the conscious level, we think it's just us being attracted to another human being because of some other reason, like the blokes hot.

Take Scorpio and Aries for instance ..... these two are really, really attracted to each other .. and yet, they are extremely appalled by the other and both of these are at the same intensity .. love/hate, positive/negative ..

Negative Scorp .. fears being hurt emotionally
Negative Aries .. projects indifference to inflicting emotional pain

Positive Scorp .. presents utter loyalty and faithfulness, trust
Positive Aries .. cannot fail and needs complete faith/trust

Positive Scorp/Aries ..... total love mentally and trust and faith in the other to provide what it is looking for to stay on axis/balanced

Negative Scorp/Aries .... detests the other for emotionally crushing/ignorance, respectively.

Attracts/repels/attracts/repels ...... we have no clue, though .. we think it's our own decisions and choices .... silly people, we are, and really quite dumb.

"Take Scorpio and Aries for instance ..... these two are really, really attracted to each other .. and yet, they are extremely appalled by the other and both of these are at the same intensity .. love/hate, positive/negative .."

I dont know about that but I'd say what you've described there ^^^ is Scorpio and Taurus. That's how it usually starts. Intense attraction and intense repulsion before it stabilises...assuming the two are patient enough to allow it to stabilise.

"I mean why would a positive (mental) or negative (emotional) person respond or project their opposite? Why wouldn't they project what they are and what they respond best to? Unless when you use the word "project" are you meaning that they repulse or repell the opposite of what they are?"


That short description was only touching on the surface, it's really very convoluted ... intricately twinned together, for mental and emotional processes work in unison, simultaneously.

Yes, you're correct, when I said 'project' I meant repulse .. wrong term, sorry.

Because we are influenced by a certain force (P/N), the method in which we project this is within the influential characteristic. For instance, because I'm a Pisces, I am influenced by the negative forces, so though I my aim would be for the good (positive), the method in which I present it will take a negative slant.

For example: I am bombarded with the negative influence that there is no reality, nothing is real, we don't exist, we're dead already .... so, my mission unconsciously, is to rebel against this by spreading to every person exactly what is real, what is truth .. however, I doso with a negative outlook, though it's for the betterment of the situation = look how you will fail, see what you did, you will fall again if you do this.

Negative influence of doom > positive reacting by repelling it away to prove it's not doomed > characterized with negative reinforcement > for a positive outcome.

The truth is I was sexually abused for a year as a child by a neighbor, and I just recently admitted this to someone other than my parents- to my therapist. She said this is a big thing why we keep on hitting roadblocks, and why I am hitting roadblocks in the way I deal with men.

--------------------------------

That didn't escape my noticing, Latina ... I had to run out for a while to do errands.

(( hugs ))

Listen, I know exactly what you are saying .. I, too, was raped at 8 years old by my babysitter. Though, it wasn't continuous like you had to endure .. still, I know personally what kind of psychological damage can be done to a person in adulthood that stems from childhood.

I know it's easier said than done, but, it's imperative for your sanity that you put this into perspective = it's not your fault, it's not other people's (men) fault = it's the fault of that one particular person. To heal means .. to grasp this, fully.

Often .. way too often .. when this happens to us as children, it is drilled into our heads (usually by the abuser) .. that we deserved this because we were a bad girl, and if we tell someone then we'll get into trouble, and our parents will be sad & angry. Of course, now that we're adults, we realize that this is wrong ... we weren't bad, we didn't deserve it, and our parents won't punish us for it.

However ... psychologically this was programmed into your head during very impressional years by means of intimidation and fear .. so the cycle will be hard to break because it's apart of your psyche. But, you can do it .. I know you can.

Tell yourself everyday, verbally and written .. everyday .. look in the mirror and write notes to yourself to read often ..

"It wasn't me, I'm a good person, I didn't do anything wrong."

When you get a boyfriend .. do the same thing ..

"It's not his fault, he didn't do that, he's a good man."


To just chew on the torment of it, isn't going to heal you, for what you are (were) thinking about IS the torment of it and thoughts create reality. Forever, then, this program will be.

Change the program .. intentionally, deliberately.

I'm good, I'm worthy of a man's love, I'm special, I'm beautiful

It works, trust me ... reality is perspective, and perspective is what you think. If you think you are above what happened, which was out of your control .. then you will be above it, you'll get past it.

child molesters should be reborn as roaches that everyone can step on and enjoy the crushing sound again and again eternally

*shivers*

"The Virgo is very leary of fakers .. when in reality, they themselves reflect back to people the other person's persona. They will become their partners ... likes, attitudes, opinions.

The Pisces is very awareness oriented and will continuously preach to others about what is actually present in reality ... when in reality, they themselves live in constant state of flux within realities that are based off of fantasy .. illusion."

Ahh... the frustration of two mutables hooking up.

"Scorpios aren't discerning in who they trust, yet, they think they are .. they will believe that every acquaintance has their back, will stand loyally to protect them ... even someone to whom they just met, they erroneously believe this person is thier "friend" .. that is until this other person gives them reason to not trust them.

And this is faulty ... it's not the other person to whom can't be trusted .. it's the Scorpio who gave trust that the other person is suppose to be loyal to them. Out of all the people you know, probably only 5% will actually be a "friend". Friends are NOT acquaintances, and acquaintances won't be loyal to you."

I don't perceive this as a problem of mine. I generally don't trust people on this level you speak of.

Can I be gregarious? Sure, but that's not the same as trusting someone. It just means I feel like being social.

I would say human beings can project onto others what they expect of themselves, independent of sign.

"eventhough there were signs all over the wall, in which everybody around him could see, but, he couldn't see it because he can't tell the difference between who is a friend and who is an acquaintance."

This sounds specific to your son. Scorpios supposedly have the ability to see the cold reality of the situation, regardless of whether they're in it. Does that mean all scorps do this? Unlikely.

""...they will believe that every acquaintance has their back, will stand loyally to protect them ... even someone to whom they just met, they erroneously believe this person is thier "friend" .. ""

No. Like, not ever. I have about a dozen friends, all of whom I've known for AT LEAST 3 yrs. Most of them for longer. I know who has my back b/c I've *witnessed* them have my back.

Nonetheless, your theories are interesting, P. I would apply them at the individual level, given a set of precursive circumstances.

***I haven't experienced that with the Scorpios I know, PP .. from what I've observed, the Scorpio doesn't know the difference between Friend and Foe until AFTER the alledged 'friend' has turned on them.***

I can slightly agree with this PA, however for myself I am going to lean more towards what PP said. Let me explain:

Yes, I do give people the benefit of the doubt until proven otherwise, however only people I care about and whom I know cares about me. I don't have a ton of friends very select few, however I have a multitude of acquaintances and I clearly know the difference. I can be outgoing and friendly but don't think I will tell you any secrets or much about me if you aren't a friend. However others seem to want to lay on my couch and pour out their life problems to me as if I am a therapist. I am sympathetic to others and their situation, but half the time I am like, "dam it look at me? Do I look like I need to be giving some advice on relationships/whatever - hence, divorced single woman... LOL!!!" However, people seem to listen to me, even with all my blutness.

My friends/acquaintances always say if they want to know the "truth" about something they can ask me.

I also know how to take responsibility for trusting someone when I knew they didn't deserve it in the first place. That has happened to me a time or two, however I blame myself not them. On the other hand I am very trustworthy (I have been told by others) sometimes I hold so many peoples secrets I think I am going to explode...

***LOL, I don't know where you found this information. The best information for a non-Scorpio is we live for knowledge because knowledge is power, we (well most of us) trust noone. So if you "think" or "believe" we trust you...you have met a true Scorpio. 9 times out of 10 we already KNOW if you are trustworthy or not witin the first 5 mins. of meeting you. 😘**

True. But there is always that occasion when the one we trust betrays us in some way... Not often but I am sure it has happened to everyone once.

Whenever I meet a new person I don't
trust them with my well-being. Like, that exercise
where you stand with your back to the
person and they're supposed to catch you...
Thereafter, still, I'm never 100% sure
you can handle me.

I usually consider it that people can let
you down...but, I do need reminding that
others will be intentionally bad.

I knew a girl whose motto is:
"I'm gonna hurt you before you hurt me."
Sad really, imo. And, my fault is in not keeping
my back against the wall in case of that sort of
behavior. Surely, she is not the only person
who thinks that way.

Take care.

QS .. my original thought which prompted me to start this thread was based more around ... trust of loyalty .. and that the Scorpio has this misplaced because they themselves have this misplaced. Getting of on the other tangent about Friends/Foes stemmed from PP.

The Scorpio believes that people should be loyal to them and if a person has betrayed them in some fashion, then the Stinger comes out .. this we all know.

However, the problem is that .. a Scorpio will trust that this other person will be loyal to them ... HOW DARE THEM NOT TO BE

Think about how many times that term has been said ..

HOW DARE YOU ...

Dare?

That is an expectation that the other person has some sort of obligation to be loyal .. because you have a misplaced conception that it is some sort of obligation for another person to honor you, to trust you .. and this comes from a trust issue.

A trust issue where a Scorpio is too trusting of others, in believing that the other should trust you.

I'm a Scorpio .. therefore I am powerful and you should trust that and how dare you if you don't ......... that's a Scorpio's fault in trust, not the other persons ... because you believe they should.

***...because the lofty goal for Scorpios is "true love"...and if you go against the grain, it is hard for them to accept. If they go against the grain, they will have a logic to explain it and will explain it (a double standard, but still they will believe it is justifiable). ****

OMG! I find this especially true for a particular scorp guy... Geeeze Double Standard should have been his middle name!!!!

A trust issue where a Scorpio is too trusting of others, in believing that the other should trust you.


Oh.
Yes.
A friend told another someone
something private about themselves. Then, that
someone told me about it. That action hurt
my feelings. When I talked with my friend
about it he got upset that I was hurt about
him not telling me rather than my being hurt
because he was hurting. I was that too, but
still though.

I get what you're saying P-Angel.

^ Pardon that, posted my comment on the wrong thread.

"P-Angel you would have fun pontificating with thelibran, who unfortunately never veers off the Libra board, but is a brilliant seer, nonetheless. However, his omniscience precludes allowing experimentation, so it can be boring to hear his pre-programmed mindsets about signs, but he is just briliiant."


Latina, I love thelibran (not that love 😉) .. and he knows it. I speak often about him being a genius, and eagerly await when he pulls something fascinating out of his brain.

To me, it isn't pre-programmed mindsets .. quite the opposite. He's one of the few people in here who isn't programmed .. 99% of everybody in here is though. He has the ability of great observation as it pertains to people having these programs, and not afraid to step over the line and comment about something that goes against acceptance to these people who are programmed.

Everytime I think of him .. I think of Einstien and his quote:

"Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity opinions which differ from the prejudices of their social environment. Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions."

"ultimately no one really ever changes. They get confused by thinking that talking about change and knowing one's flaws with thinking that they are making an actual change and it isn't the same thing."


FuckinA .. when I start threads like this, it isn't really for anyone to make a change, or to confuse somebody. Looking deep inside to the root of a person on an unconscious level is something I'm very interested in delving .. and is really just for my own personal benefit in trying to understand other people, and not really for the purpose of the other person changing.

I'm a person who wants to open doors ... not guide anyone to guide through the door, just open it up to see what is inside.

"not guide anyone to guide through the door .."


oops .. *** walk *** .. not guide anyone to walk through the door

Latina, for example with thelibran .. he had the below response, talking to kris who accused him of believing Libras are always right ...

"And no!!! I dont think libras are always right. But I do think that libras stand a greater potential to be always right if we are ready to think even deeper and carry certain informations which would help us to evaluate a future situation in few more different angles."




And I agree with this 100% ... the more information a person has to consider every situation in which is multi-layered .. has the potential to always be correct, as compared to those who seek only one solution.

The ones who only seek the commonly familiar solution are the ones who are programmed to respond within an already proven and acceptable outcome that has been established, and made precedence.

The person who seeks to look outside of the box of acceptable solutions that have been established .. is the person who is NOT programmed within a mind-set.

But, because 99% of people are, indeed, programmed ... then any consideration outside of what is an acceptable opinion would be viewed adversely, simply because they don't possess the capability of registering anything outside of this programming = to these people, this would be viewed as a virus, in which it's not ..

I understand, and you're right .. people really don't apply information for self-growth as often as they should .. with most situations in which doors open for them.


"I don't think your or anyone else here is responsible for anyone else's growth or lack thereof"


However, I do apply such things .. and is the reason for it. And I am respsonsible for my own growth and understanding .. which, as I said, I make these threads for my own benefit.

Don't mistake my digging into the psyche, and hearing responsing to other opinions as being on some kind of a mission to change another person .. for that would go against the very thing I preach about most in here and in real-life .. which is .. be yourself, be who you are.

My purpose to analyzing humans psychologically is for my own growth in understanding people = a handicap from birth.

"and if we crash into a tree it won't be because he hates me but because "he is blind"

You're example made me giggle .. it was cute.🙂

Scorpios have great healing powers .. much more than the rest of us possess, and most everyone else steps into the same puddle over and over before the light goes off in our heads.

One of your gifts ...

Unfortunately .. sometimes, it takes many many years before this transcending process to eagle can take place ... you are fortunate that it happened at such a young age ... an age in which a person is very impressionable. But, think about a person who is like 30, and getting stuck into their ways ... creatures of habit.

How easily then would it be to heal from this?

People fascinate me .. all us do and say things on an unconscious level most of the time and don't even realize what we do.

'Forgive them Father, they know not what they do'

Maybe Jesus was talking about us being so dumb, and just following habits and ways, without having the ability to realize that we can grow from ourselves .. into ourselves.

"i learn so much, helps me shape my perspectives, and this repetitive learning really sticks in my mind, and helps me make better decisions in practicum."

Me too .. perspective always changes, and that's a good thing. It's unimaginable how much I've learned about myself while on dxp .. daily, and new epiphany happens, and it's fully embraced .. sometimes to the point of becoming boring for others ... but, great growth for myself.


"i also really love learning from others' experiences"

Unfortunately, I can't do this .. wish I could. I read in here people talking about events in their lives and other people responding with words that suggest they can relate, they can understand ... and I can't. However, I realize that everybody else can empathize, for it's clear in their repsonses.

Really glad you're learning, Latina 🙂 .. whatever it is you need to learn. For a person to not have a desire for self-growth .. they might as well be dead, already.

"I say understanding is the best gift someone can get."


Agree whole-heartedly ... in situations, all situations, there is a reason why things happen. To just look at the fact "that" it happened doesn't really accomplish anything except feeling resentful, or angry, or whatever horrible emotion arises because "that" happened.

But, if a person looks at "why" it happened, and has an understanding into what motivated, or moved a person to do what they did, or said .. you then have the power within yourself to put it into perspective, and not be resentful, or become vengeful for it.

You can then still walk away ... but, now you have a clearer vision, so you know exactly what was just experienced and why .. so you can carry this knowledge forward. Without gaining this understanding, and just reacting with vengence or ignorance .. then if a similiar incident happens again .. you have no recourse expect to just react with the same resentment, or anger.

You're a wise Eagle, jd .....

Just found this post and trying to make sense out of it:

"Just like an Aries (a positive), they are subjected with the positive influence so believe they are invincible, mentally they are positive that they cannot fail .. balances thier axis by ... projecting this out by being emotionally oblivious or impervious to consequences (negative response to the positive influence)."

- do i get this one correctly: since i'm an aries and by default my inner nature is positive and therefore i project/say/feel/think/respond to other people in a negative way? am i right or wrong about that? not sure if that applies here but i do think mostly in negative terms eventhough i don't like that at all. trying to push negativity out of my mind.

ariesgirl .. it means that to be oblivious of consequences due to thinking a person is invincible and cannot err .. is actually a negative response, though, this person would believe it to be a positive .. balancing.

For outsiders looking in (= projecting of this) ... we see that a person who believes themselves to always be right and cannot be wrong in anything they do as being a negative ... for if this is present, then the person to whom they are relating will always have to be wrong, if you are always right.

Did that make sense?

still a little shady on understanding here but what's the best way to change this situation and appear more flexible?