Apologizing to a Taurus Male.....A Decade Later

What is it you think you need to apologise for? Having his baby? Allowing yourself to be cheated on? Not getting an apology for a year post his cheating? Taking him back? Allowing him to disappear for days without a word? believing your friend following all of this behaviour?

Thank you so much TauruSaurus

Thanks guys....

I didn't read the whole thread, sorry. : ( But, as another poster said, just say everything unfiltered. Say it as it comes to your mind. This guy has been through enough, so I think he deserves you losing some 'respect' or dropping your pride and seeming a little 'weak'. I mean, god, you said he waited outside your house for what was it, 10 years? He did all that and your worried about those trivial things. If he's stuck around you this long and still maintains active contact with you, he won't turn around and make you suffer. Though, maybe it's best that you let him get out whatever anger or pent up emotions and thoughts he's had, because that's healthy, and then continue on how you were before, or continue however you want to. It will sound a lot more real when you don't type it out in points or formally and you just say it as is. Don't just tell him how you feel, tell him how you misinterpreted the guy for however long it was. Saying you were wrong about him will make him feel better. And at this point, why not do something to make him feel better? Saying and doing all this is better than sitting around having to listen to him apologizing all the time and you wondering what you should do about it. Just be open and real. It seems to me that you're the only one making yourself 'suffer'. You blame it on the taurus, but in actuality, is that his purpose, and is that something you can't solve just by being more open and honest with him?
Anyway, since I didn't read the whole thread, I might have missed a few points. Sorry. But, this is just what I feel from the parts I've read, at least. Whatever you do, don't stick to silence. Not taking action is such a waste in this short life.

I read that bit, though. If he stood outside your house, isn't that a way of showing that you meant a lot to him? Maybe he was trying to get repentance somehow through that. People make mistakes all the time, and it seems to me as though he regretted what he did. And though you feel that is unacceptable, who here has really been suffering since that time? Not just you. You think he did you terribly wrong, however I'd like to hear his side. All I see is someone who has greatly regretted cheating, been asking for forgiveness in different ways, and who might not know HOW to interact with your kids since he was never part of their lives, before (or was he?). Also, keep in mind that you have a things with words, and he doesn't. If he doesn't say it, you think he doesn't mean it. Maybe you should look back on the things he's done instead of said. You say he asked for forgiveness 8 years later. I see it as, he asked forgiveness the moment he stood outside your house. That's 8 years you could have been healing your relationship for your kid's sake, at least. Not saying you're wrong about not wanting to forgive, he did cheat. But, the outcome of this situation isn't just his fault. I think if you want to make a genuine statement of being sorry, you need to understand that, which you do to a degree, but also believe it. There's two sides to every story. You seem to understand most of that yet are still uneilling to forgive it all because you believe he was wrong and you did right. you say in the other posts on this page that you understand he was saying things without speaking them, yet what you tell me shows you dont. theres a disconnect im not quite understanding here. oh well. i hope you didn't take offense to this and instead thought of it as something to think about. Though, if I knew your situation better, maybe I would think differently. This is what I'm sticking by, for now, though.I hope you end up figuring out what to say to him, though. It'd be nice to hear what kind of reaction it brings, positive or negative.

Hi guys, I removed my posts....I am working on things with Taurus and would rather he not find that I was asking private questions in a public forum....but thanks for all of your advice and I would appreciate it if you quoted me, you would hide that post.

Thanks
S