anonymousheart
@anonymousheart
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Comments: 63 · Posts: 714 · Topics: 35
Giving the Taurus silent treatment- yay or nay (Page 2)
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We spoke last night. It was like just depressing haha. I mean, really unproductive.
I expressed myself and he was very cold. Quiet. Shut down. Which was confusing considering the love poetry and text seemed like an invite for me to call him. I will admit, I'm very pissed and defensive. But still, very sincere. I expressed myself, then I cried a bit, when talking about the death of a family member. For some reason this hit him, and he ws like sorry for making you cry. Which was weird, cause he's BEEN making me cry. But that lasted a second. he can't provide any clear answer as to what he wants in life/out of the relationship. So it seems pretty hopeless/shaky to me honestly. Doens't seem like we want the same things, bc he doens't know what he wants. And I do. Again, i didn't feel supported, I expressed this. He's just not getting it. He says he needs time, and we could "maybe" meet up in person to discuss. he always uses this as a default, that he would rather discuss in person. It sounds good, but it just seems like a stalling method. With someone who lived out of the country that was the same excuse. Couldn't send her an email bc he needed to "talk on the phone" and that allowed him to drag that mess out another two weeks.
Regardless he said he needs more time to think and we need to focus on our lives. So he is "there for me" on his terms...and I guess hasn't had neough time to think about it? He still maintains he feels the same, and wants to be with me...but he isn't showing it. And my instincts thing those are just words.
I sent a nice text today saying I just wanted him to be happy and for us to be. And good luck on his test. I got a really fake nice response back (I hate that) ...it seemed flowery and impersonal. I guess he's trying to be positive/not upset me. But it just seems like we barely know each other. Phony on his end. I get the impression he's buying time until he decides, even though he's trying to give the impression that he's in, I don't believe it because everything does not line up.
I expressed myself and he was very cold. Quiet. Shut down. Which was confusing considering the love poetry and text seemed like an invite for me to call him. I will admit, I'm very pissed and defensive. But still, very sincere. I expressed myself, then I cried a bit, when talking about the death of a family member. For some reason this hit him, and he ws like sorry for making you cry. Which was weird, cause he's BEEN making me cry. But that lasted a second. he can't provide any clear answer as to what he wants in life/out of the relationship. So it seems pretty hopeless/shaky to me honestly. Doens't seem like we want the same things, bc he doens't know what he wants. And I do. Again, i didn't feel supported, I expressed this. He's just not getting it. He says he needs time, and we could "maybe" meet up in person to discuss. he always uses this as a default, that he would rather discuss in person. It sounds good, but it just seems like a stalling method. With someone who lived out of the country that was the same excuse. Couldn't send her an email bc he needed to "talk on the phone" and that allowed him to drag that mess out another two weeks.
Regardless he said he needs more time to think and we need to focus on our lives. So he is "there for me" on his terms...and I guess hasn't had neough time to think about it? He still maintains he feels the same, and wants to be with me...but he isn't showing it. And my instincts thing those are just words.
I sent a nice text today saying I just wanted him to be happy and for us to be. And good luck on his test. I got a really fake nice response back (I hate that) ...it seemed flowery and impersonal. I guess he's trying to be positive/not upset me. But it just seems like we barely know each other. Phony on his end. I get the impression he's buying time until he decides, even though he's trying to give the impression that he's in, I don't believe it because everything does not line up.
This is the part of earth signs I don't understand.
But I think his words are a crock of shit that he actually believes
But I think his words are a crock of shit that he actually believes
Anonymousheart,
What made me laugh is I am done with that drama thing with a Taurus man.
Remember: Our fights that leads a break up is my negative comment for his friend.
And He then said He wanted the Me he first met and not the one talking negative about his friend.
My advice: Stop being nice and prove yourself. Taurus has a big heart. Once you apologised once
is enough. Too much explanation won't work it will just lead to a fight again.
If he loves you... he will make it up with you.Regardless of his sign.
and yes... I have lots of pairs of shoes.. lol
OH WOW, That sounds similar. He finally told me last night that he just "can't stand hearing people talk bad about other people." Basically he feels like I was cutting into his friend (also mine) and that makes him feel the need to defend them, which makes sense. I can see how that's not a good look!
Prove yourself? How! His heart is too big in my opinion :-p
But yea, too much talk does lead to another fight. Idk what else to do but move on. I'm working on a music video and all I have to do is post that to have him crawling back with googly eyes.
But I want him to love me for my imperfections, not my image.
Prove yourself? How! His heart is too big in my opinion :-p
But yea, too much talk does lead to another fight. Idk what else to do but move on. I'm working on a music video and all I have to do is post that to have him crawling back with googly eyes.
But I want him to love me for my imperfections, not my image.
Maybe this is the question I should have been asking:
DO TAURUS HAVE DIFFERENT/HIGHER STANDARDS FOR THEIR LOVERS VS. FRIENDS?
DO TAURUS HAVE DIFFERENT/HIGHER STANDARDS FOR THEIR LOVERS VS. FRIENDS?
hahaha. see that. They love their friend. We need to respect that for them.
for now... I am ok and he still kept buying my needs and for my family. He also wash our laundry.
but in my mind... I know why he kept doing this.
I read a comment of TLS. Taurus man are loyal people. I think this is different loyalty he is
referring.. It sounds like loyal to their sacrificial even their heart wanted to disloyal.
So I am off guard with that...and still after yuletide season I will do my own thing.
Posted by anonymousheart
Maybe this is the question I should have been asking:
DO TAURUS HAVE DIFFERENT/HIGHER STANDARDS FOR THEIR LOVERS VS. FRIENDS?
HELL!!!!!!!!!!!
YES!!!!!!!!!!
I do anyway. Run into this with my Sag all the time.
Posted by M143
hahaha. see that. They love their friend. We need to respect that for them.
for now... I am ok and he still kept buying my needs and for my family. He also wash our laundry.
but in my mind... I know why he kept doing this.
I read a comment of TLS. Taurus man are loyal people. I think this is different loyalty he is
referring.. It sounds like loyal to their sacrificial even their heart wanted to disloyal.
So I am off guard with that...and still after yuletide season I will do my own thing.
I'm telling you. Scorps are too bound by their *feelings* like all water signs, to really understand the loyalty of bulls. Its not always good to follow the heart. You guys seem to follow your heart/emotions wherever they lead you. We follow the decisions and commitments we've made.
Religious and/or "good guy" Taurus will really be turned off if they see actual cruelty or maliciousness in you, gossip, spite, mean-spiritedness, self-centeredness, etc. The more committed they are with you, the more it'll bother them, and they'll expect you to change and rise above that. The fight that seemed to spark the end of M143's romance with her bull was all about that very thing. I sense that a lot of stuff you vent here, especially your negativity about his sense of direction, boundaries, etc. are genuine, but a) not something you really fully express to him (hence a lot of venting it here) and b) probably going to come out eventually and ultimately be a factor in the end of the relationship. It does indeed sound like you are two people with very strong wills and very different natures/views - both unlikely to change much.
The good part about being with a bull is that, a lot of times, once we're comfortable, we'll stay with you even if our instincts tell us something is amiss. The bad part is that that is also the bad part about lazy/loyal Taurus - and while you have a committed partner, both of you wind up miserable. I just think this match is pretty bad bc I have seen what you two are going through so many times. The disagreements, the silent treatment from the Leo when the bull isn't seeing it he way, the ignoring the issues by the Bull just wanting to keep the peace.
Who else are you Leos supposed to be compatible with?
The good part about being with a bull is that, a lot of times, once we're comfortable, we'll stay with you even if our instincts tell us something is amiss. The bad part is that that is also the bad part about lazy/loyal Taurus - and while you have a committed partner, both of you wind up miserable. I just think this match is pretty bad bc I have seen what you two are going through so many times. The disagreements, the silent treatment from the Leo when the bull isn't seeing it he way, the ignoring the issues by the Bull just wanting to keep the peace.
Who else are you Leos supposed to be compatible with?
Lol. TLS,
Seems he misunderstood me. I am religious woman. Active in church. This is my fall too.
but what triggers me most is that I am a straight woman. He is not.
Why would I allow somebody else to ruin my life...?
Did you tell your wife to engage into swinger's life? How deep you know my conversation with
my Taurus man? I didn't lay all the cards in here. I still respect him as a person.
I know deep down... He is different. and He knows too I am different.
The bottom line is to respect each and its own views of life.
The love of Scorpio woman is too costly...and we tend to burned our feelings and let ourselves die
for the meantime and rise again. The rebirth process is a normal thing to a Scorpio.
I don't think the rest of us water signs do anything on a whim when it comes to relationships (generally speaking...there's always an exception or the odd duck)g. It took me 4 yrs of tossing the pros and cons of divorce around while being in an abusive relationship before I decided to end it (I have kids with him so that's why I rode the fence). It's just that when us other water signs finally decide to change something we DO IT and it looks like its on a whim. Most of my friends didn't know a fraction of our marriage problems until the last 5 yrs and were shocked to find it was less picture perfect than I let on.
Redbull,
lol. ok so the bull can match us. This is not a game boy, man. We are just different kind
of woman.
When my ex Taurus man sent me long long email before arriving to his condo.. I suppose to answer
''amen'' but I hold on my words because he is more sensitive than me. In fact, I change it into
something funny and flirtatious and dare him more how long he can stand with me and thus if he can do
it, I will salute that for him. Scorpio woman don't like to be challenge in anyways. We are strong
type and do anything to get what we want. In other words we like MYSTERY ...just Don't talk bull just
do it. lol.(if only he knew what I mean)
Seems like you want to control him and feel threaten by anyone who comes near him at all? I feel sorry for the man.
Hmmm. I just logged back into FB and this was one of his statuses
"Just a thought that love may not exist, denies my whole self-being. Yet I can understand why so many have this thought played out through life, remembering how many times they were told of all the good things, that love can bring. Phrasing I love you, you are the one who understands me, countless moments of grazing eyes and trully feeling no pretense. Being the one without regret until that one moment when you're left and all that once was love is dead.
I can understand"
Which prompted everyone to write "I love you and you;re such a good person" on his status.
He also wrote this in his comments "Just felt like expressing what I see in many people's belief, or probably disbelief"
This was two days ago. But I wasn't checking up on him.
It seems like things are much worse with him than I thought.
"Just a thought that love may not exist, denies my whole self-being. Yet I can understand why so many have this thought played out through life, remembering how many times they were told of all the good things, that love can bring. Phrasing I love you, you are the one who understands me, countless moments of grazing eyes and trully feeling no pretense. Being the one without regret until that one moment when you're left and all that once was love is dead.
I can understand"
Which prompted everyone to write "I love you and you;re such a good person" on his status.
He also wrote this in his comments "Just felt like expressing what I see in many people's belief, or probably disbelief"
This was two days ago. But I wasn't checking up on him.
It seems like things are much worse with him than I thought.
I realized he probably posted this after our last awful phone conversation :/
A status like that to me is 'drama'
That just pisses me off/confuses me more
That just pisses me off/confuses me more
Posted by anonymousheart
A status like that to me is 'drama'
That just pisses me off/confuses me more
what *honestly* bothers you? Is it that these are females responding with the "I love you"s? It would bother me. I'd be like "Hey Tenderheart. Can you please stop posting your cheesy pseudo-romantic musings on the nature of love on your Facebook, so your girlfriends can fawn all over you?" That's just me though; I'm a controlling tyrant. If you want to allow him to be who he is and stuff (and he is a little cheesy), you should just chill out and stop analyzing/judging, keep things lighthearted, maybe even ignore his FB for the most part.
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You're right, he's super cheesy. Cue Libra moon..
And you also called it, he wants his harem to slide in and comfort him.
I'm gonna try to ignore, honestly , this garbage is just annoying.
But I think I don't trust him, bc I am more jealous than is healthy. I don't think he's 'with me' at the end of the day. He still flirts and I see sparks with him and this chick at church or w.e. When I'm with someone, I kill all sparks with anyone else. I don't even seen anyone else.
Pretty much thinking everything is just too messed up at this point.
He doesn't even have his life/head together, and isn't communicating at this point.
You're right, he's super cheesy. Cue Libra moon..
And you also called it, he wants his harem to slide in and comfort him.
I'm gonna try to ignore, honestly , this garbage is just annoying.
But I think I don't trust him, bc I am more jealous than is healthy. I don't think he's 'with me' at the end of the day. He still flirts and I see sparks with him and this chick at church or w.e. When I'm with someone, I kill all sparks with anyone else. I don't even seen anyone else.
Pretty much thinking everything is just too messed up at this point.
He doesn't even have his life/head together, and isn't communicating at this point.
Posted by anonymousheart
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You're right, he's super cheesy. Cue Libra moon..
And you also called it, he wants his harem to slide in and comfort him.
I'm gonna try to ignore, honestly , this garbage is just annoying.
But I think I don't trust him, bc I am more jealous than is healthy. I don't think he's 'with me' at the end of the day. He still flirts and I see sparks with him and this chick at church or w.e. When I'm with someone, I kill all sparks with anyone else. I don't even seen anyone else.
Pretty much thinking everything is just too messed up at this point.
He doesn't even have his life/head together, and isn't communicating at this point.
LOL, yeah...I'm mostly "good guy"/religious Taurus and I have some sparks at church. Mostly with Leos though...lol. It doesn't mean anything; he probably just likes the attention. Women can really see all this potential in bulls and start to really put us on a pedestal, without us doing *anything*, that we'd quickly fall off of if they knew our lazy arses better. And we really like being on that pedestal, so, by our design, those relationships aren't really going to get past the flirty spark stage. Anyway, you shouldn't have killed your sparks. Best leverage to burn a harem is to have your own to negotiate with. But now you have to get in there and kill his sparks too. You have good intuition and you know what's up with all of it. Just call him out on it. You're scared to let the jealous monster loose it seems...lol. But bulls are pretty understanding of it; we have one of our own. Some part of us likes to see you all jealous and passionate for us, even if we act like you are crazy for it.
Hahaha! It's funny cause...she's a LEO.
But hey, I'm a better singer (:
"those relationships aren't really going to get past the flirty spark stage"
You're right, even he admitted he used to just flirt around, and he never steps up. It takes time, and trust and friendship...and then something spiritual/cosmic to get him off the lazy place.
It's funny what you say, cause Taurus has a harem, but better believe Leo has a fan club. A BIG ONE!
I cut myself off from a lot of people lately, but I'm sure when I feel better and get back to my social self that will just happen naturally. I don't want any pretense surrounding it though cause I don't wanna play games.
"You're scared to let the jealous monster loose it seems...lol."
LOL, errr, yea. Hurts the Leo pride ya dig?
Anyways, I calmed down a bit, and called him up and was nice. We are gonna have dinner and catch up. I'm sure it will be fine cause I'm feeling fine. Less overwhelmed. He usually follows my lead as long as I am nice.
But hey, I'm a better singer (:
"those relationships aren't really going to get past the flirty spark stage"
You're right, even he admitted he used to just flirt around, and he never steps up. It takes time, and trust and friendship...and then something spiritual/cosmic to get him off the lazy place.
It's funny what you say, cause Taurus has a harem, but better believe Leo has a fan club. A BIG ONE!
I cut myself off from a lot of people lately, but I'm sure when I feel better and get back to my social self that will just happen naturally. I don't want any pretense surrounding it though cause I don't wanna play games.
"You're scared to let the jealous monster loose it seems...lol."
LOL, errr, yea. Hurts the Leo pride ya dig?
Anyways, I calmed down a bit, and called him up and was nice. We are gonna have dinner and catch up. I'm sure it will be fine cause I'm feeling fine. Less overwhelmed. He usually follows my lead as long as I am nice.
Hahhaa...do you both sing in church? Because one of the Leos that I have the spark with is one of our main singers. She is really amazing too. Anyway, I swear she stares right at me - right into my eyes from the stage during her songs. LOL. I'm not really ashamed of my jealousy if a person is out of line. I think jealousy is totally appropriate in some contexts. And If I'm not jealous for a partner, I definitely am not in love. I think most people are jealous and just lie about it.
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
Hahhaa...do you both sing in church? Because one of the Leos that I have the spark with is one of our main singers. She is really amazing too. Anyway, I swear she stares right at me - right into my eyes from the stage during her songs. LOL. I'm not really ashamed of my jealousy if a person is out of line. I think jealousy is totally appropriate in some contexts. And If I'm not jealous for a partner, I definitely am not in love. I think most people are jealous and just lie about it.
I don't sing in church. I sing in the real world.
That chick though just took over vocals in church,and it's a big church. She's not a good singer, but she's very involved with the church. You know how that goes...
How can I get him to show jealousy? He was very very interested in the fact that there were guys in my yoga class hahahha
That's MESSED UP! She's suposed to be singing to god not to you!!!!
dammit *supposed
Posted by anonymousheart
That's rt bitches..
I actually watched this happen it was awesome. Some groupie was looking at him all googly eyed talking at church. All I did was walk in he stops, walks completely away from here, stares in amazement, and says, "I'm sorry. Can I give you a hug? You look so beautiful I'm tearing up." I literally watched that girl roll her eyes HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAH
It. was. AWESOME!!!
Posted by anonymousheartPosted by TaurusLovesScorpio
How can I get him to show jealousy? He was very very interested in the fact that there were guys in my yoga class hahahhaclick to expand
LOL! I am not gonna tell you how to make your bull jealous. I don't advocate such games, even if I play them. hahahahhaa....C'mon though. You don't need any advice on that.
The Yoga class is hilarious. I asked about my Sag's Zumba class...LOL. Zumba!!!! Hhahahaha....I went online and found a one guy in a picture at the studio - a (very obviously) gay dude, and I was still asking all sorts of questions about him. I think I suggested that he could be bi-sexual and she shouldn't wear anything revealing....Hhahahahha!
OH COME ONNNNNN LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He seemed concerned because I told him if I were a guy I'd be all up in the yoga classes cause it's GENIUS!
I was met with a minute of silence LOL
But he's very subtle about it. !
He seemed concerned because I told him if I were a guy I'd be all up in the yoga classes cause it's GENIUS!
I was met with a minute of silence LOL
But he's very subtle about it. !
Zumba gay guy? Guard yo property! ASAP!
Even better idea. You join yoga/zumba to expand the harem.
You're WELCOMEEEEE
You're WELCOMEEEEE
Posted by anonymousheart
Even better idea. You join yoga/zumba to expand the harem.
You're WELCOMEEEEE
that would be way too much effort.
Taurus men get jealous when you talk other guys even they are just a friend. a boss.
Taurus men when they get jealous, it could be the end of relationship.
Posted by M143
Taurus men get jealous when you talk other guys even they are just a friend. a boss.
Taurus men when they get jealous, it could be the end of relationship.
Especially that boss with you Scorps. we know how you're attracted to power.....lol
TLS,
I attempted 1 time letting my Taurus ex know that I maybe coming home late because my boss was in the
office... He been always letting me know where he was going.. and just replied him have fun and take
care...
But my 1 attempt turned into a mess..
That's why when I got home that time... My clothes already in the couch. I was regretful why I let
him know I'm with my boss.
It's not very effective, to say the least. You can silent treatment a Taurus, but like someone else said, we will most likely act like nothing ever happened, like we didn't even notice that you were silent-treating us. I have yet to figure out the reason behind this. Maybe it's for the sake of keeping the peace, allowing the other person to cool down and think their motives through. And maybe it's just an endurance battle.
I think it's a combo of keeping the peace and the fact that they usually refuse to admit when they're wrong so they want to gloss over the mess asap. Case in point: a few years ago, around june, the ex hubby (taurus) asked where the registration sticker for the motor home was. We were getting ready to go on vacation for a couple of weeks. Our tags came way back in March when we had it smogged and the registration renewed. I distinctly remember giving him the envelope it came in and after that I had no idea what he did with it. I told him, "I gave you the tags when they came in the mail and that was a couple of months ago." His response: "No you didn't. I don't remember that. You lost them, didn't you." Then he proceeded to berate my housekeeping skills, grumbling about it being no wonder the tags were lost since the place was a pig sty (in his opinion). I've always kept a clean house. Other than the occasional laundry pile that might accumulate (like after a vacation) or the random day to day papers (kids school papers that were graded and given to us, junk mail, magazines, etc.) that will need sorting there really isn't a big mess because I don't like messes. So, he kept this grumbling and insulting of me up for a couple of days until he found the tags. They were on the dash of the motorhome exactly where he put them after I gave them to him months prior. Did he apologize for accusing me of losing them? Nope.
For the Tauruses who might be taking notes and want to improve on traits that aren't so great: PLEASE get over this one! Others really REALLY take it as pure asshole behavior.
For the Tauruses who might be taking notes and want to improve on traits that aren't so great: PLEASE get over this one! Others really REALLY take it as pure asshole behavior.
Posted by MoonArtist
For the Tauruses who might be taking notes and want to improve on traits that aren't so great: PLEASE get over this one! Others really REALLY take it as pure asshole behavior.
Woah woah woah....WHAT is with the generalizations? This is such a (defensive) trait of Cancers - having a deep hurt and projecting the perceived cause onto some larger category of people. You're on the Taurus board here where you have to give us the benefit of the doubt, understand we are all unique individuals, yada yada....
Now was this exact kind of scenario a huge factor in the dissolution to my marriage to a Cancer? Sure. And is this something I do every other day - go on the rampage, complain about mess, and accuse others of things they didn't do - all to the extreme disappointment and hurt of my partner? Yes it is. But not everyone is as sensitive as Cancers. My Sag is way better at dealing with me when I go Hitler, and much more forgiving afterwards.
We'll talk about the mess later. Those daily piles you come home and make with your bags and your papers - they just sit around and ruin our quality of life because their always there! We need you to be able to remember where we lost our shit!
lol.
We made up (:
It's alllllllllllll good!
It's alllllllllllll good!
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1) Is she your friend or his friend? 2) Was she his friend first and now (also) yours?
We all became good friends around the same time 2 years ago. But they have known each other maybe 3 years? Before I moved here. Again, it's a big group of people. So they have an understanding, but aren't supre close. She is not someone I now consider a friend, only an alliance
If #1, you need to have a talk with her not with him. He was showing loyalty to YOU if he was doing something for YOUR friend. She's the one with boundary issues in this case. It's his friend, and I was showing I was upset, and he just ignored me.. so that's not the case. Did I mention she is now my roomate? I did speak with her btw. But this isn't the first time he's overextended himself to women and cut into his time with me. Major balance/boundary issues.
If #2, not sure I'd personally consider her a friend. She's his friend and potentially deals with you being around just because she's loyal to him. Given the choice in the future, she will choose him over you and if you push him, he may choose her over you.
He's going to have to reach his own conclusion on this one. Bulls, what if she was honest and told him how this is hurting her to see him focus so much energy away from their relationship? Would that be a good or bad thing at this point? Make him see her as needy and clingy?
I have done that. He just distances himself at this point. He is becoming numb in the sympathy zone.
Tell him you appreciate that he has a heart the size of Texas. Suggest that the two of you could start volunteering somewhere in the new year, to spend time together AND contribute to making the world a better place. Then he subtly gets to see what the non-profit world is like from the inside and decide for himself if he wants to move in that direction.
This is a great idea that I've done. He's stubborn and seems to want his own way. Honestly I'm beginnign to think he's more about talking about non profit than doing it, because I've done lightyears more research. I forward him countless emails and he doens't step up. SO idk...He has this profoudn inabilty to plan ahead. he's scared of it. 😢