Some insight into the Taurus man

Hopefully someone can offer some insight, as I'm a little confused. My only experience with a Taurus male prior to this one now is my first love. He was great, loyal, and we are still friends (we were all of 17).
I met someone online and we hit it off. He called me the next day and we talked on the phone the entire day Lots in common, the conversation flowed and we seemed to be hitting it off. I'm in my early 40's. I have a good job, good life and have my act together (I learned from a lot of past mistakes). I've been doing the online thing for a while, and I remain optimistic and try to not judge anyone until I've gotten to know them.
He tells me he's a widower. He does slip in the conversation that it's been an issue with past relationships (he claims jealousy on the part of the women). What I told him, is that I do not care about a person's past, so long as they are mature enough to move on. Basically, I said I am looking for a relationship, so if the person is over their past, I have no jealousy issues.
He lives a couple of hours away, so we realize logistics might be tough. His job has him driving all over, and the very next morning, he texts me that he is going to be in my area. So, I tell him "well, let's meet nearby for a cup of coffee".
To say it was electric is an understatement. When I got out of the car, he actually leaned in and kissed me immediately. Coffee turned into nearly five hours of talking, along with a lot of touching and kissing. It was great. I haven't had that kind of chemistry in a long time.
After all that, he proceeds to text me the next two days. Saying goofy things, calling me "hon" things like that. In his texts he doesn't suggest when I might see him again. Now, I haven't heard from him in over a day. At one point, he said he found it funny I didn't search about him online, so today, I decided why not. Turns out, his ex was living with a boyfriend (I'm not sure they were even married), was an alcoholic, and wound up dead with the boyfriend. She was a Libra (which I am).
I don't need nor want to control him, but it's weird to go from such intensity to suddenly vanishing. I don't know whether to text him, say something, totally unsure. I did text him a smiley face earlier today, but no response. He claimed that if he wasn't interested, he always told a woman. So, I'm confused. Any insight on what is happening here, and whether I should proceed at all? I'm also wondering if he is still carrying a torch for the ex?

A day? Really....? You are freaking out because a man you met once hasnt contact you for one day?

Take a look at your investment in this.....how realistic are your expectations? Get to KNOW the man before you get so attached. Especially someone who was involved in an alcoholic relationship with such tradgic consequences. RED FLAGS!

Taurus men are slow...they pull back...and you barely know who this guy REALLY is. Take care of your heart...its a precious commodity, that shouldne be given out to someone you have only alustful connetion with. he should earn it.

Posted by BigGirlPanties
A day? Really....? You are freaking out because a man you met once hasnt contact you for one day?

Take a look at your investment in this.....how realistic are your expectations? Get to KNOW the man before you get so attached. Especially someone who was involved in an alcoholic relationship with such tradgic consequences. RED FLAGS!

Taurus men are slow...they pull back...and you barely know who this guy REALLY is. Take care of your heart...its a precious commodity, that shouldne be given out to someone you have only alustful connetion with. he should earn it.

Oh, I agree a day isn't worth freaking about..it isn't that. Although it is strange to have someone come on so strong and consistent then suddenly vanish. It would be one thing if he said "gonna be busy" and leave it at that. Last I heard from him, he texted me, I responded and asked a question then never heard from him again. So, not "continuing" the conversation/answering the question and disappearing for (now) two days, obviously a red flag does go off.

And yes, I agree about getting to know someone. I knew nothing about his past at all until I did the digging yesterday and that's why I'm now questioning whether to even bother. I'm not attached, I just had a nice connection that I wanted to pursue, so now that I know his past, I am debating whether this is even worth pursuing before I DO become attached.

I totally agree about "earning it" that is why I'm even questioning this.

Well to give you some very minimal insight on the Taurus man I met online 3 months ago. He is slow as molasses. He lives 2 hrs away also. Is very loner like, despite being highly educated with 4 degrees. He was ok with our emailing only t first, but after a month, I moved it to the phone. I had to take all the initiaitves. He would text and during a text converstaion, he would just stop. Never close it off.

We had long convos on the phone, hours at times. But we never went into lustful talk, I wanted to get to know him as a friend and so did he. He opened up very little personal stuff, but one night finally let a big one out...tht he is a *naturist* ie: nudist. LOL yea, laugh...its ok 😛 It freaked me out a little but in the end, I didnt care. As we seemed to got on well, he called me more and I finally suggested we meet. This after 3 months. At first, he seemed hestitant, like a nerd who was fearful of a woman...I told him I wasnt looking for an online friendship and if we wernt on the same page, we should part ways. He called, said he absolutely agreed and wanted to set it up. I return the call, no answer, no return call back and no reply to my test. Blew me off.

Next day he calls, but I was too pissed off and said forget it, too inconsistent. He called a few more times, left messages but made no mention of getting together. I had told him inconsistency was a deal breaker for me and I meant it. I emailed one final time that I was sorry he did the flip flop but Im bailing cus he just wouldnt open up and tell me why the back slide. That was 5 days ago and I havent heard from him. Im bummed, I liked him, but as slow as taurus men are, and stubborn, this is just too much. Good luck, I hope it works out. But, from someone who was married to an alcohlic and endured a lot of pain, believe me when I say this guy is really challenged with those memories. I hope it goes well for you, keep us updated.

Well, I too ironically was married to an alcoholic nearly two decades ago. When it finally turned abusive, I gave him the ultimatum that either we work it out and I help him get out from the addiction or that I had to leave. He wanted no part of recovery, so I left. So I totally understand the mindset coming out of a relationship like that. In my case, I decided to instead focus on myself, and spent nearly a decade "fixing" my issues. Am I perfect, no by a long shot...But I can honestly say that I do have my life together, and in wanting a partner, I am capable of being one in the truest sense.
My Taurus guy wasn't hesitant at all, within a few emails he wanted to talk on the phone and called me as soon as I gave him my number. The impromptu meeting happened the very next day after we spent the entire previous day talking. He was VERY outgoing...reminds me a lot of my ex, a Saggi, who had this natural charm and a smile that could disarm you before you even realized it. I just kept thinking it was weird that he was surprised that I hadn't looked him up, which led me to finally search and find what I did. Where I guess I'm disappointed, and you can appreciate this...he wasn't even married to her at the time of her death, she was with another boyfriend (quite a bit younger than her) and one of those "tortured artist" types. I find it upsetting that people like me, who are artistic, have talent and still keep their wits about them can't seem to compete with people who are deemed saintly despite their flaws. I don't get cut that kind of slack! LOL
But you hit it on the head with the simple statement of consistency. I don't need promises, daily affirmations, nothing..just consistency. If you liked me, and want to see me again, say so. Don't text/call constantly then suddenly vanish. He still hasn't contacted me, I doubt he will. I'm tempted to contact him, but don't feel it'll serve any purpose than to feed his ego knowing I'm thinking about him. I guess I should consider myself lucky I found out earlier rather than later. It's just disappointing because to see him, you'd never know!!

Posted by LibraGirl1969

But you hit it on the head with the simple statement of consistency. I don't need promises, daily affirmations, nothing..just consistency. If you liked me, and want to see me again, say so. Don't text/call constantly then suddenly vanish. see him, you'd never know!!

That is all I want from the Taurus guy I was seeing and it's been a week that he just vanished! He came on strong in the beginning and now its...*sighs* I feel so hopeless now and wondering if it has ended? I am a Scorpio gal and with me relationships are deep and true and I do not play mind games! I am just so confused if it was something I said or what I did?

I mean geez how could he just be so cold and dwindle away like that? It hurts for me it hurts because I am very emotional and it's so mind boggling that a person could be that way. I showed him and told him that I liked him a lot but he showed nothing to me so I don't know if he is being protective and needs time away to "think" or that's it....He mentioned his ex cheated on him while he was deployed and so I'm not sure if he has emotional scars that is holding him back? Like you I felt a nice connection and wanted to pursue it but he just left me...and I don't know what will happen and hopefully he will return to me. If not I will wonder about him...