Another one of those..Leo Woman/Virgo Man

Hi I am new here. I will not be able to give those wonderful details on his moon or Mercury locations. I know his Bday and year. But here we go:
I am the definition of a Lioness. I am all Leo. I have recognized those strong Leo traits that can be unbearable and tried to keep them under control while allowing our wonderful strengths flourish.
I have a Virgo friend. I have "known" him for years through the net for a decade. I meet him through his ex wife. Our friendship over the past year and half has really changed and grown into a true good friendship. I officially meet him a year and half ago when he was in my area for work. I admit, there was a physical attraction for me when I meet him. I also have an ability to discearn who a person is when I meet them, and I must say there is something special about him that I felt when I meet him. He made it clear that night his physical attraction to me, but did not want to disrespect me or my marriage. He also made it clear he loved how I carried myself in public and my own successful in my career. Come on, what Lioness doesn't carry herself with grace and isn't successful. 🙂 He was in a process of divorce. Our friendship just grew from there.
Well, I have left my Leo Husband for various reasons in a trial separation for him to get his act together and I see this heading to divorce as we don't see eye to eye. My Virgo friend has really been there for me. And we have allowed ourselves to explore our physical attractions and I must say, astronomical. But on the other hand, I value him dearly as a person, a farther, a hard worker, intelligent, and just beautiful person. He has shown his inner sensitive side to me in small parts. Then there are times he clams up and I will back off and just let him know I am there for him. He comes to me when something goes on in his life.
He told me many months ago he never wanted to be in a relationship or love again. Then recently he said it would be nice to have someone by his side. I get these glimmers that he may be interested in me more then a friend then there are times I am not to sure. Part of me thinks he is but he has things he has goals he wants to reach first and he is waiting to see where my marriage goes. Then I get the feeling, he sees me as just a friend. There are times we will talk about everything. Then there are times his responses I feel I am talk to much by his response and back off. Then within a couple hours he contacts me. Is he intere

Little Clarification CluelessCancer. One, I am not jumping from one relationship to another. I am not ready to enter into a relationship yet, and won't even consider a relationship until I walk out of the courtroom with the divorce decree. But there is a strong interest with this person. I have been separated for several months and have not even given the time of day to another man but this person, we are human and we all have needs. I have been with my soon to be ex-husband for over 14 years and he was the only person I knew or gave my attention to. I never forsaken him while we were together. There is only so much you can put in these comments. I see something here that could be more and there is a strong attraction, when the time comes, I would like to know if this person has interest in me. Even He isn't even ready for a relationship. But atlas, you are not a Virgo, so this is a mute point.

Bump...

Where are you Vigos? 🙂 Any input? No, I am not looking at a relationship with this person right now. This will take time before it would go there. I have been married since I was 19 and I need to know who I am as a woman today. I need to make sure this marriage is over. I am 95% sure, but I know my Leo guy will not give up to easy, but if he doesn't get his act together and do for his family, I am not going to be with him. I need to mourn my marriage as well and recover myself before I am willing to give myself to anybody else. I have known this Virgo guy for years, but have really got to know him over the past year and a half. And when that time comes, I may be interested in seeing if there is something that could come from this friendship. He is really an amazing person and beautiful inside and out. I am not sure if I am purely friend zoned or if he has interest in me. We have daily contact. The most we have gone without contact is 3 days and that is me backing off and him asking where I have been. He says I am a friend, but yet I get this glimmers that maybe he see potential of more in me. I get a morning text every day with him calling me beautiful. He tells me I am amazing. He says I am a beautiful and successful woman and he admires how I have goals in my life. I am an amazing mother (something his ex is NOT). If I feel him going cold through our communications I will back off and within hours he is contacting me. He has made comments before that he doesn't want women around his children (he has custody), which I get and understand I am the same with my babes, but the last time I saw him he told me when you meet my son you will..... We don't live in the same area, a couple hours away from each other and lately he has been saying things, maybe one day we "whatever".

He calls me his friend. I know he isn't ready for a relationship and neither am I. But I am not sure if I am strictly friend zoned or if he is evaluating me for something more when he is ready and I am?

Coolcappy, while I agree with you on Leo's tendencies for being extravagant, not this Cat. I am one of the more frugal ones. Material positions don't matter to me. Heck, I drive a 13 year old car and it isn't that can't afford a new one, it is practical for me. I am the one who picks things up at the store, then put them back down and walk out. But I don't need his money, I make my own money and care for own, Thank you very much.

Posted by TheLioness79
Well, I have left my Leo Husband for various reasons in a trial separation for him to get his act together and I see this heading to divorce as we don't see eye to eye. My Virgo friend has really been there for me. And we have allowed ourselves to explore our physical attractions and I must say, astronomical.

Posted by TheLioness79 I need to make sure this marriage is over. I am 95% sure, but I know my Leo guy will not give up to easy, but if he doesn't get his act together and do for his family, I am not going to be with him. I need to mourn my marriage as well and recover myself before I am willing to give myself to anybody else.

He calls me his friend. I know he isn't ready for a relationship and neither am I. But I am not sure if I am strictly friend zoned or if he is evaluating me for something more when he is ready and I am?

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Married @ age 19 and married 14 years so I take it your 33? First let me just say the last thing you need to be concerned about is how this Virgo feels toward you. KEEP IT PLATONIC..I repeat..KEEP IT PLATONIC!! Because let me tell you when the divorce is filed officially your world will be turned upside down, inside out whether you go to trial or try and work out a settlement. Doesn't matter. It is one of the most stressful situations anyone could go through. Especially a marriage that's over 10 years. ALSO...the part above where you say your soon to be ex will not give up easy. Well guess what? When he realizes it's over, it's not going to be peaches and cream. The fact that your distracted with this Virgo and not trying to work out your marriage speaks volumes. Don't be another statistic and think the grass is greener. Seems like you are putting ALL the pressure on your ex when you say he needs to get his act together. It takes two to work out marital issues. Don't put it all on him or you will regret it. If it's over file for divorce, the longer you wait the more difficult it becomes. THEN and only THEN can you "mourn" your marriage. You will go through every emotion imaginable. The Virgo knows this. So either shit or get off the pot if you want a distant future with the Virgo.

When you sign those papers, then you MAY be ready for a relationship. But to think there's a possibility of one now is ludicrous! To see if the Virgo has feelings for you before you file is also a sign of weakness. Either work on your marriage or get a divorce. Because trust me, if you think for one minute you can juggle both, you'll remember when you try the very words I just expressed. I wish you luck!

Posted by CluelessCancer
Clap clap clap Let it Be. If you watered your own grass you wouldn't think the grass is greener somewhere else.

They didn't come up with that saying for nothing ya know?🙂

LetltB,
I really appreciate your honesty and your candor. Thank you. And I agree with you 100% in everything you have said. Let me give a little background on my marriage. He is also a Leo. Over two years ago I urged him to follow his dreams and go to school for Radiography. I was in a point in my career that the loss of his income would hurt but I could carry the 5 of us. (three kids) Shortly after he started school full time (like a week) and not working I become victim to the economy and got laid off. So we went from extremely decent income, to decent income, to NO income. I was always the breadwinner though. I had foolishly just used our savings to get ahead a couple of months as I adjusted to our new income with my raise and him not working (still a difference). I did finally land a job with very decent pay, but the damage was done. I asked and begged for him to work PT on the weekends while he was in school and NOPE. Then he was asked to leave to school for various reasons this past summer and I begged him to go to work. Nope. He became the Regal Majestic Lion with his big dreams and the fool thinks he is going to be a famous DJ and his "career" is going to be taking off at 37. Through hard work and trying to juggle a children, a grown child who was taking money from the pot to support the family, a stressful demanding job, financial ruin from job loss and I tried everything to save it, we lost our home. That day I told him to leave until he can put the needs of his family above his selfish wants. So yes, the pressure IS on him. He still isn't working. Oh wait, let rephrase, he isn't even the country or same continent right now. I have not seen one lick of support for his children and he left two days after I had major surgery and left the care of the children to my family as I had major complications. So yes the marriage is 95% over as I am concerned and if he just magically changes then there is that 5% . I am not delaying the divorce, if I could, I would be at the courthouse today. Sadly, the state I live in is very archaic. We do not have "Legal Separations". I cannot even file for a divorce until we have been separated as a married couple (board and bed) for 1 YEAR because we have children in common. Crap, I cannot even get the Property Settlement Agreement in because he is not here to sign it.

Hide message because I screwed it up.

CluelessCancer, your mic was best left on the ground. 😉

Close. Aug 12 Leo.

Someone else had talked to me about the expediting. I don't have that option. I have tried and tried. Unless I lie about the date of separation, but that I would not do.

Wow..there's so many of these economic downfall stories. You are not alone. The mere fact that he did not step up to take care of his children is disheartening, especially losing your home!!

Yes, most states is a year of living separate. Good thing you had family to step up for you. Damn..where do these men come from?? ugh....My advice to you is whether he comes back from wherever it is he went, remain separated! He needs to show effort & stability for your family, and if he does not, I guess you have your answer. I wish you luck. Regarding the Virgo...embrace his moral support, and GO SLOW!

Oh, in my state the Property Settlement Agreement (PSA) is the "expedite". It is the "divorce from board and bed". But I still have to wait the year until the final decree can be ordered. I am unable to get that because he is must sign it, and that is a little difficult.

LetlB,

It is very disheartening and heartbreaking. This isn't the man I have been married to. He had great work ethic and worked hard before to care for his family. I don't know, mid-life crisis? But I am to the point, go follow your dreams, I just hope one day you will understand why I did what I did. I have always been the one to keep him on track and focused. He has to experience life and that life is hard. He needs to make his decisions and learn what the consequences are. I was the dominate one and made all the decisions. If I asked him it was what you think or want. So the other side of the coin, me forcing him out was also for him to learn how to be an adult and be his own person. And Trust me, he is not stepping foot back into the home with us unless I see a new person. He is learning the cold heart of the Leo when they have been betrayed or feel the person has fallen from grace. Then on top of it, I find out he is talking negative to the children about me and anyone who can listen. Your wife and mother of children? That is the biggest and most hurtful disrespect. I have lost respect him as a man and a person and when us Leos do that, it is dangerous.

My Vigro friend. That is where he will remain for now and I do appreciate the moral support he gives me and I let him know. He has grounded me and gotten out of my lavish freak outs and break downs with his realistic, true, and kind words.

Virgo Flirt,

A quitter I am not! Things try to keep me down but I come out on top. (:

Coolcappy,
Harsh? Nope, honest and I appreciate honesty. I do agree with you about Leo's be extravagant. And in most cases, that would happen to the Virgo. But I am not. He even offered to help me in an emergency situation and I declined. The last thing I want from him is his money.

I am going slow. I need to go slow for my own personal reasons and it would not be fair to him if he was into me like that if I couldn't give all of myself or (hand to mouth) the ex and I get back together. I would never want to hurt him in any manner. But he is teaching me patience and that I do lack and am 100% Leo in. I want what I want. It has actually helped me become a calmer person on the inside to learn to be patient and somethings just need to happen. So even if it ends up I am just a friend, I have learned a lot from this person for own personal growth.

And thanks. Don't know what is wrong with my ex, he needs to grow up and get through whatever he is going through for his children's sake.

CluelessCancer,
I just want to beat so sense into his clueless Majestic Haughty Leo head. The whole marriage I questioned if even if he even was a Leo, and this is how he shows me. hmpf

EXACTLY!!!

Get this: So when I told him I wanted him out. His response was he wanted to go to X state because his cousin owns a couple of Clubs and he can the sole DJ in one. I told him that was "HIS" choice. But to think about the babes. Mom and dad are not together. I have to uproot them from the only home, area, school, and friends they have known all their lives so I can be closer to my job (I was commuting 100 miles a day) and be their mother as a single mother that him leaving the state and them not being able to see him is going to devastate them and he is abandoning them.
His response: Well you are kicking me out the house so I am not here everyday what is the deference? I did almost hit him upside the head then. And now he is saying I am not letting him go to his cousin. Uh, no. I said that was YOUR choice. Think of your kids first though.
But wait, he isn't in the country now. He was suppose to be back last month. Now it is this month. Whatever, we will see.

Oh then on top of that, through family therapy with the children and I, I found out he told his son before he left, he may never see him again. And the poor boy has been devastated. Remember, I was in the hospital recovering from major surgery when he left and he never came to see me. Yeah, do you think they will arrest me if I beat some sense into him?

Don't do it. I am NEVER getting married again. Once is more then enough.

CluelessCancer,

I married him after 3 months of knowing him and at age 19. I didn't really "know" him but knew he treated me life a queen. I was young and immature. I don't regret my choices I have made in my past as it makes me the woman I am today and we had many good years together and some not so good. He also gave me three beautiful children that are my world and are amazing. But lets face it, I was a baby still. When I meet him he had just got out of one branch of the military after serving 4 years and wasn't doing anything. He had thoughts of going back but didn't want to leave me. I told him if we were meant to be we would be. I urged him to resign and he did with another branch. He was set to leave for AIT training. One night I was playing around and said, prove your love to me and I said something stupid. Then he said to me prove your love to me. OK how? Marry me tomorrow. And I did. The next day he left. I was kid and only knew him for 3 months, hell we beat many odds for being together for 14 years. But I am not the 19 year old baby anymore. I am now a grown woman. The passiveness drove me nuts. Us Leo women like challenge. We will not settle to be beneath our mate, we must be equal but we need a challenge. But the passiveness (I wouldn't call it push over because I tried to engage him) is not a relationship. There needs to be some conflict for discussion, understanding, compromise and growth. Yeah, I always got my way and that feed my pride. But that is not what I want when I do move forward with my next mate. I just hope he learns to be adult and make decisions.

CoolCappy, don't hate your honesty. It is a trait to be admired. I personally prefer brute honesty. Sugar coating is for the weak. I hope we are able to maintain a positive parental working relationship. The children need us to be a united front when it comes to them. My fear is he may just disappear out of their lives. I thought I had at least got that right. I have tried to keep things cool and level and only ream him if it has to do with the children and he is not doing right. Otherwise, I have withdrawn myself so he can discover life. Kind of like tough love. He is still angry at me for asking him to leave and that is all he sees. He has to get over it and work with me as Parents. Thank you very much too!

Posted by CluelessCancer
How do people have the ability to jump from one person's bed to another..one relationship to another.

this is ridiculous.

color me confused.

drops mic.

I know a Leo female who does just that. Thing is she just can't be alone. She's not done with one before she's off to the next one. That wouldn't be bad if she wasn't sleeping with them. Some women are very needy and need to have that next warm body all lined up before they move on from the one they're with.

Posted by TheLioness79
Little Clarification CluelessCancer. One, I am not jumping from one relationship to another. I am not ready to enter into a relationship yet, and won't even consider a relationship until I walk out of the courtroom with the divorce decree. But there is a strong interest with this person. I have been separated for several months and have not even given the time of day to another man but this person, we are human and we all have needs. I have been with my soon to be ex-husband for over 14 years and he was the only person I knew or gave my attention to. I never forsaken him while we were together. There is only so much you can put in these comments. I see something here that could be more and there is a strong attraction, when the time comes, I would like to know if this person has interest in me. Even He isn't even ready for a relationship. But atlas, you are not a Virgo, so this is a mute point.

"moot"

Thank you GemStar05 for the grammar correction. And I am not one of those need women. I don't need another warm body lined up. OK, lets revisit that. Before husband yes. Now no. Except for this person, and again, I am not looking for the relationship now, frankly I am scared to death to enter the dating scene when I am ready. I am a woman now and not a little girl. I have children and they are my number one priority. I really don't want to "meet" people at this point in my life and I think will be a very long time before I am ready. LONG time. I have my friend BoB and as long as I feed him batteries, he is happy with me.

Posted by TheLioness79
Thank you GemStar05 for the grammar correction. And I am not one of those need women. I don't need another warm body lined up. OK, lets revisit that. Before husband yes. Now no. Except for this person, and again, I am not looking for the relationship now, frankly I am scared to death to enter the dating scene when I am ready. I am a woman now and not a little girl. I have children and they are my number one priority. I really don't want to "meet" people at this point in my life and I think will be a very long time before I am ready. LONG time. I have my friend BoB and as long as I feed him batteries, he is happy with me.

LOL! All women should have a friend named "BoB" lol! :-)