Trying to help a heartbroken Virgal...

Hey guys...

My virgo friend is heartbroken and I don't know what do for her. Her ex-boyfriend dropped her really hard and she's retreated into herself and isn't letting anyone close...

Is this the usual way virgo's handle this sort of thing? I've tried to be supportive to her and she's hardly responding... is it best to continue showing her support and being there for her or should I back off and let her do what she needs to do and let her venture out of her shell when she feels it's safe to do so? I care about her emmensely and would do anything to just see her smile again because I'm worried sick about her...

Just not sure what I should do that is best for her... any other Virgos, particular Virgals that can offer me any advice?

😢

Hm, it can be tough for Virgals after a bad breakup, or anything really emotionally unsettling. When we retreat into ourselves you know it's bad. Usually I like for people to let me come out and talk about it on my own. Don't goad her to death. Try not to ask "are you okay" more than once in awhile. I particularly hate being asked that question. It's helpful to just let her know that you're there to listen. Being a Gemini, depending on your personality it may seem odd to you that a person doesn't want to talk about their problems. (My friend/roommate is a Gem and whenever something bad happens she wants to talk about it immediately. It seems to confuse her when I retreat into myself to figure things out). Depending on her other chart placements there might not be a ton that you can do. Just continue to be a good friend and she'll appreciate you for it. You could try watching a favorite movie or eating a favorite meal with her. It's something that's comforting without outright talking about it. When she's ready she'll start talking. Believe me.

Retreating from the world is our way of healing and making sense of what happened. We need the time and space to ourselves to do this. We can't hear our thoughts if we are constantly chatting or if others are chatting in our ear. You sound like a very kind and loyal friend to her. As long as you already let her know you are there for her, which I am sure you have, there is very little you can do.

All you can really do is call her up once in a while or text/email if she is really being distant and just let her know you're checking in on her and ask if there is anything she might need. She will definitely appreciate that. Keep it simple and short, and let her dictate how long she needs to talk. Don't take it personally if you don't hear from her or if she isn't responding eagerly.

I've done the exact same thing before and my friends know this about me. We get too overwhelmed by the world and just need to be left alone if we are hurting. it's not you, it's the emotional pain that we have to process using our intellect. And that takes a lot of time.

Virggy:

My gem friend did the same thing! She was always on the phone getting advice from 10 different friends regarding her problems. She even had her friends call me to help me out with my problems, which was nice of her, but that is just NOT how I solve problems. I actually had to distance myself from my Gem friend due to this. It got to be too invasive and I realized that I don't make friends the same way she did. She was always expecting me to be friends with her friends and I was just never that interested in doing that happy dance. I was willing to be HER friend, but not with the whole crew.

Virgospirit: My Gemini friend is great, don't get me wrong, but Geminis are just so vocal and social. It can be overwhelming. She was similar to yours in regard to making friends. Immediately she wants to introduce me to people she's met. She hasn't gotten to the point of being overly-invasive, but man..

Virggy, Well that's good she isn't invasive. I just sort of faded out of her life and didn't confront her because she is a really good person with a good heart. i didnt want to hurt her with the truth. We last saw each other dec 2011. I now look back and realize I didn't set healthy boundaries for myself when we interacted, which I would absolutely do now.