Virgo friend- whats going on in his mind?

Hey,
I have a Virgo friend. He is very 'weird'. Its the second Virgo guy I have had issues with. He blew hot and cold. I am very stubborn . He is as well.
No idea what he thinks of me.

He is very shy but has some kind of a wall around himself. Its very difficult to break it.

How is he like? Can you tell me?
I realise its weird to ask about him at the forum but please do it for me. I am very confused.

SOmetimes he's rude sometimes he behaves like he would like me. Its very different than other people.

hes sun is in virgo.
10.09.1989

im aries 21.03.1990

As a virgo woman -- May be different but i am extremely guarded and it comes off as aloof and impenetrable. its usually all our own inner world and over thinking - often the walls are up because we are mistrustful of others and like everyone fear being hurt.
Give him space and time and hopefully he will let you in

I'm an Aries too that has dated 2 men in a row that are Virgos (Not knowingly or intentionally). Believe me, we aren't the best matches for them. And you are correct, they are a bit confusing, they run hot and cold. But what they do like is someone who isn't clingy or dependent on them or overly emotional. Generally, the small success I've had with them has been just in being my own independent self. If they give some towards me, I'll give back. If they pull away, I'll just let them be till they reach out. It's kind of their way. It's nothing about you.

Good luck girly! I'm an Aries too and I can never get Virgo men. Virgo women we get along great though 🙂

IME I've had 2 Virgo men reject me and 2 chase me. You just can't be into them ‚

Posted by SensitiveBlues

Posted by xtina
IME I've had 2 Virgo men reject me and 2 chase me. You just can't be into them ‚

Then what's the point? They must really hate themselves

click to expand

Truly, that's why I said (and I think you'll agree) they're simply not worth the effort.

Posted by xtina

Posted by SensitiveBlues

Posted by xtina
IME I've had 2 Virgo men reject me and 2 chase me. You just can't be into them ‚

Then what's the point? They must really hate themselves

Truly, that's why I said (and I think you'll agree) they're simply not worth the effort.

click to expand

Wow.

@OP

How long have you known him?

Is this a friend or an acquaintance?

More details pls.

Posted by xtina

Posted by SensitiveBlues

Posted by xtina
IME I've had 2 Virgo men reject me and 2 chase me. You just can't be into them ‚

Then what's the point? They must really hate themselves

Truly, that's why I said (and I think you'll agree) they're simply not worth the effort.

click to expand

I swear I'm just going to go out on a limb here and ASSUME u meant to finish this sentence with ....."for ME!" Otherwise, it would truly amaze me how all of us Virgos get lumped in one huge pool of not being "worth it" for ANYONE!! I swear IF that's the case then Aries folk (including the bitter Cancer folk...Lol!) should take a huge leap off the tallest bridge and save the rest of us from their "charge-full-steam-ahead-and-consider-consequences-later-all-about-ME-spotlight-stealing" drama...including both of my sisters that are both Aries! But that would be truly INSANE to actually really think that about all Aries folk who actually do have some wonderful traits! This board never ceases to amuse me...LOL!

Posted by mika_1990

Virgo guy I have had issues with.

He blew hot and cold.

has some kind of a wall around himself. Its very difficult to break it.

Its very different than other people.

What kind of issues? That's a very general statement, to then turn around and attempt to say it's faulty.

Everyone who has emotions blows hot and cold. It's called: having varying feelings
If you are human, then I would suspect you say this in contradiction of yourself, and believe yourself not to be human with varying feelings.

Having a wall around the self is a good thing. It's being wide open, without having any kind of self protection mechanism in place that is bad. Secondly, why would you want to break it? do you want someone to break you?
Having the courage and strength, and wisdom to know to protect yourself is a good thing ... and here you want to tear it down. so, the logical conclusion becomes = you have no sound judgment skills, in where you want to tear down the very fibers that keeps a person sane with themselves, because it protects them.

Of course he's different from other people. We're all different from each other. You're a strange individual, and your concerns sound very juvenile, as if you zero life experiences.


My suggestion to you is to grow up because every thing you've said sounds like a child talking.

Posted by Damnata
@OP

How long have you known him?

Is this a friend or an acquaintance?

More details pls.

he has been chasing me for a long time last year since march i guess. i was not sure because i had my issues with school and other stuff. eveyrtime we met i didnt know if he was playing or not because he was acting weirdly- like a shy boy? but when it came to his friends he was very open and talkative. and i was so cinfused.
he is professional in what he does. but had problems with girl.
he has one friend who claims to be his best friend.

he 'cought' me and we have been together for a couple of weeks, but he was blowing hot and cold then. i saw him without a 'mask' of a cold , independent guy. even thought common friends were asking me why would he behave so nicely and calmly whe i was around.

when he started to pull back i started to pull back as well. so he was chasing me again. but of course my patience was over and i decided to talk to him. everytime i wanted to talk or to meet even in a group of friends ( or we were meeting each other unexpectedly) he was ignoring me all the time, being vulgar like he would want to push me away.

for me it was so confusing because i didnt want to marry him. he is a free spirit i am as well. i dont know what this common friend told him about me. but she also keeps him by herself no idea why - even tho she is in a relationship.

its been 7 months that we have been together for a short period of time and then he was showing me signs he didnt want me at all. like he would play with me or no idea.
i tried to be nice and didnt make any dramas. but he didnt even tell me he would go abroad to work for 3-4 months.
he is back now. we sometimes meet in the downtown to party but its like it was before.

he was my friend who was showing me attention so i was glad that finally someone was giving me it. and i was being nice to him even tho i could be rude and selfish. i decided to be calm and nice because i didnt want to lose him. and then when FOR ME things were getting ok- liek HE WOULD invite me, he would present me to his friends, he would party with me - then he decided to pull back. which i did as well. and then? he forgot
now i dont know how to behave because i cant think of him like of a friend anymore. i like him like i did before. and i see he AGAIN stares at me and observes me, approaches me when i am around.
so for me its confusing.

its the second virgo guy that behaves the same.
even though he is 26 yo. i am 25. and i know that some men are scared of commitment. i actually did something opposite - i didnt push him to anything - i gave him space. maybe too big space.
its not like i am sitting in front of a computer crying at loud. i meet other guys who are actually more resonable and they know how to behave. but he attracts me sexually and intele

its like he was chasing me -> we have been together, -> then he was pushing me away, he was pulling back like he would not want me. and then after some months i see again he observes,stares at me like it was before. like he would change his mind? no idea.

I feel virgo men who build walls really know what they are doing to a fault. We're second to cap or scorp men in terms of misdirection.

Again, speaking from personal experience.

ok so how should I behave in front of him? if I still like him and Im confused by his behaviour? i mean - its in 95% that he doesnt want anything from me but still keep staring and approaching. why? because he wanna be nice ? just a nice guy talking to an EX?
wtf

Posted by mika_1990
Hey,
I have a Virgo friend. He is very 'weird'. Its the second Virgo guy I have had issues with. He blew hot and cold. I am very stubborn . He is as well.
No idea what he thinks of me.

He is very shy but has some kind of a wall around himself. Its very difficult to break it.

How is he like? Can you tell me?
I realise its weird to ask about him at the forum but please do it for me. I am very confused.

SOmetimes he's rude sometimes he behaves like he would like me. Its very different than other people.

Typical Virgo putting up a wall. The wall is for security and to stop from getting hurt. Something you said or did must have set him off to be hot and cold, we're not like that for no reason. Need more info, but for now be normal and kind.

The only way to crack that wall down is to show you're trustworthy and you won't hurt him, that will take time - patience is the key.

Its been 7 months since our hanging outs.since march 2015 he has been interested in me ( im not stupid I saw that ) but i have no idea if he was shy or stupid(?) and everytime we met he couldnt talk to me normally , was being weird, nervous.
then we started being with each other, i was invited over several times to his app and i met his friends but one time after we had an intimate situation he invited me over next day. then next days he didnt contact me at all. he sent me snapchats he was partying with friends,
next days i texted him i would like to meet and talk and he agreed.but he was in other town so i was waiting for his sign to contact me when he will be back- no reaction. then i started working and he accidentally met me at my work with other friends few days later. he just said- hi, very roughly and went away to other people.
on weekend we met up on party and he was around some girls and was weid when saw me . like nervous or he didnt know what to do in front of me.
then 3 weeks after without contact he invited me over for a party- i didnt come and then after this situation he would totally ignore me, like turn back to me, even being a bit vulgar,.
he invited me over for a bday party and he didnt thank me for a present even though he thanked everyone- i was the one he neglected.
so after his bday i felt like he was pushing me away for some reason so i didnt want to feel bad myself and decided to step back. i was doing my things, living my life and etc.
then we met on a party because he would go to brazil for work for a few months. when he saw me he didnt want to talk even like a friend and so one. and when he saw me approaching took some random girl and kissed her. then went away.
after few months after he came back to my city from brazil i decided to write to him to meet up. to ask hows everything. he invited me over to downtown at 1:30 am before christmas. so it was cold and i didnt come because i had a weird connection with downtown.
on new years eve he was looking at me again, approaching me, observing me all the time. didnt make any move. i tried to talk to him very shortly. i cant break his wall. i mean BEFORE our situation he was nice to me and of course he was ok . even after our situation- month or 2 month after he was ok and then he changed. but i dont get it . it was me who had to ask about meetings. he didnt do it. he didnt even want to talk about IT.
liek he would only pulled back and then made a wall. so for me it was obvious he didnt want anything from me andthese were just random hookups...
but its still weird. he is ppular, has a lot of friends, he works, a lot, professional in his field, veyr open minded, veyr open, very talkative, has a lot of work friends as well , when he talk he talks very intelligently- and when it came to me - he couldnt even open his mouth...—

its been almost 7 months and im a bit giving up.i mean before i was thinking about him, trying to be in parties where he was. but now i ga

thank you! now after 7 months its like we are like before, friends??
i have no idea . because i want sth more? and i dont want to scare him.
i am even afraid of sending some snapchats to him because he would think i am possesive or so....

i see he parties with other friends .

i am just afraid he now sees me as a hookup girl only.
or he changed my mind of me :\
and i dont know if i should contact him...

because his hot and cold behaviour and wall made me think that any of myt back step would scare him so i got back and im afraid of meeting him because i think he doesnt like me.

2 weeks ago we saw each other on downtown and he was ok like to a friend.

:/

i want to be sloooow and casual?
because i know he likes me ,
and the same observation and so one but not sure of him... really

@op
Move on

How did I click on this Virgo thread geesh