Viro Men and their rudeness!

You say you're being frank but sometime you virgo men don't realise you're being downright rude and hurtful!

I hear ya!
they are hard to take and sometimes they take the biscuit!

I agree that they may not do the things you've mentioned Branh0913 but that still doesn't give anyone the right to be rude or hurtful. It's like saying because we're sweet with this it gives us rights to not be so for that. That's unfair. And it's not sensitive signs alone, all people are sensitive to anything hurtful, that's human nature regardless of what sign you are. But Virgos seem to know what buttons to push....especially if it's someone they love dearly. Why do you guys do that?

Wow, I think that was definitely an intelligent perspective on the Virgo behaviour and thinking. Thanks!

My boss is a virgo and a nice one at that..I don't think he intends to be rude but at times, the way he speaks to fellow colleagues it would appear he has no communication skills whatsoever..I cringe because the person coming over for assistance is just baffled and walks off...

"I think Virgos sharp tongues is just a small thing honestly. When you have a converation with a Virgo and he may see you going down the wrong path, he says something"

lol....I wonder why virgos seem to think that all their uncalled for bitchiness is 100% altruistic, good for you, "keeping you from going astray my child". ROTF....how delusionial is that? Most of the time, its just plain attitude over things that don't matter. MOST people are a little high strung about things that actually do matter.

"I don't think he intends to be rude but at times, the way he speaks to fellow colleagues it would appear he has no communication skills whatsoever..I cringe because the person coming over for assistance is just baffled and walks off..."

Its just a plain lack of couth....or not caring enough to have any. A 30 to 40 something year old person who is intelligent should be able to figure out something so basic and simple as people skills. Some people just can't help themselves but cookimonster, and they claim to be "misunderstood" out of just plain laziness to be any different. True everyone has a flaw, but the true a-hole is proud of his and wear it as a badge of honor...hell, he might even think its "good for you" lol...

***but you won't see them stand you up, not call you when they say they will, talk behind your back, or break promises either.****

If you read most of the Virgo boards here alot of women are being stood-up from Virgo Males and they don't get calls back either even when the Virgo male says he will call you back. I do believe that they don't talk behind your back, though. But, they seem to break a lot of promises. Just my 2 cents.

LOL @ CancerLa..he's 36!..no people skills whatsoever..I sometimes pull him up on it. There really isn't any need to be that abrupt as soon as you open your mouth. Maybe during conversation by all means become rude if the person is utterly stupid but not from the outset.

I guess I must have ended up with the rare one of the bunch, because he's the opposite of rude. His approach is direct enough, but, his words are NEVER hurtful to anyone's feelings. And, the times he does have to be forthcoming with an ugly truth, he always wraps his arms around the person first and tell them how much he cares about them before delivering something dreadful.

Why my Virgo is so different, I'm not sure.

P-Angel: I'm sure most of the women on here wish they had the type of Virgo Male you have. It's good to know there are good ones out there. I'm sure most of them are good but, the ones we normally talk about on here are the ones that are not good for us otherwise we wouldn't be talking about how to figure them out. I noticed a huge difference with the one I was dating. At first things were great and he treated me so well, then he decided I was too good for him and that our life style s were too different and he started to become rude to me. He was truthful with me but, I'm a Sag and I believe that the impossible is possible which, I had a hard time giving up on him. He has a huge problem with commitment and has been burned in the past so, when things were too good, he stopped it before he got hurt. I know he still cares but, he can be rude sometimes.

Oh, sorry for getting a little off track

On second thought, maybe he is just like the typical Virgo everyone bitches about. However, the difference is me, rather than him.

The number of people I know who go whinning about their little feelings getting hurt is countless, when in fact, the person talking wasn't being rude, rather, the crier is just too sensitive to handle truths.

Personally, I'd prefer someone being honest and direct, rather than lying, indirect and superficial. It's possible that these Virgo's aren't at all rude . . it's the other people not having any control over thier emotions. Not every word someone speaks is intended as an insult.

Don't take something personal that wasn't intented on being a personal assault, and your feelings won't get hurt because they weren't suppose to. Sometimes, people tell you things that you NEED to hear and respect should be given to this Virgo who cares enough to want to help you . . if she/he wanted to hurt you, they would have ignored the issue and let you fall.

Not talking to anyone in particular here, just babbling about my take on it.

However, I think both virgos and saggies can be reasoned with as long as you don?t bull-shit them. Let them know that they need to chill out or else how will they know how you feel. Sometimes, you have to show them that you are not going to put up with it in or for them to really understand.

hehehe...cancerLA...yer funny 😛


Branh, speaking strictly of interpersonal relationships, you don't believe that there is a way to tell someone the bottom line in a way that isn't coarse and offensive?

At the same time, if a person is in denial, they probably aren't psychologically ready to handle or accept the truth...especially not from someone's perspective who is essentially on the outside. I'm not saying it's good to bullshit people, but a little sensitivity regarding serious issues doesn't hurt..especially if someone is in denial. People need to realize things for themselves.

And I don't consider taking a sympathetic tone rather than a critical and judgmental one when giving people advice as prettying it up. You can still be honest.

"I didn't exactly beg to hear about someones issues. I know I personally don't present my issues to people unless I am ready to hear a real perspective or some type of solution. If I am not ready, I keep it to myself. I like to call that respect."

That's a good point. Maybe people sobconsciously know you'll give them solutions, and that's why they come to you. But the manner in which it is presented still pisses them off. 😉

Right, Wheels, "especially if someone is in denial. People need to realize things for themselves."

But, for how long? What if it's a lifetime? What if it's something that's wrecking your whole world, but, the person has not the courage to accept a truth?

There is no way to talk about something ugly without it sounding that way.

Just spend the rest of one's life hiding from yourself because it's too painful to hear?

I don't know, I'd rather have honestly, even if it's brutal, then have to endure a person beating around the bush for hours and never realy saying anything because they are too afraid of feelings.

Regarding Virgo men in general...yeah, it seems like they get a kick out of being unnecessarily blunt. I know they're supposed to enjoy criticizing but DAMN. 😛

"I don't know, I'd rather have honestly, even if it's brutal, then have to endure a person beating around the bush for hours and never realy saying anything because they are too afraid of feelings."

But that's the whole issue. Tactfulness does NOT equal beating around the bush. It is completely possible to direct a person to realization, rather than shoving the "harsh truth" in their face. And who's to say your harsh truth is even correct. Unless you are in a situation, you can't fully understand it.

I'm trying to figure out where everyone finds these Virgo's who enjoy critisizing?

I've never met one . . is there a club that everyone goes to, or something? Where are they?

Not in real life, or in here, have I met any who enjoy critiszing people.

That's quite odd.

You can't fix peoples' problems. As much as you would like to. It's not going to happen. People fix their own problems, if their problems get fixed.

"Unless you are in a situation, you can't fully understand it."

Oh, see, I thought we were talking about being in a relationship with a Virgo, not just an outsider.

Maybe that's the whole problem. Virgo's want to share your path with you. If there's a person who believes that their Virgo is not in their situation with them . . then, all is lost.

There are plenty of signs out there who will take the lead and plow full force ahead, not taking into consideration that their road in life is suppose to be shared with their partners (mainly fire signs) . . . a Virgo doesn't know how to just obey and be silent when not needed to speak. They believe that their journey with their partner is equal and therefore, they are in the situation.

But, maybe were not talking about intimate relationships. Sorry, if I misunderstood.

It seems so easy from the outside, when you look at things sytematically and objectively. But people (as has been pointed out) will always have their selfish motives, desires, and fears. When they come to you with problem A, presenting solution B most likely will not solve it. It depends on how entangled the person has become.

I'm just saying, complex problems don't always have simple, bottomline solutions. And there is rarely one person who deserves ALL the blame.

P-Angel, it started outabout Virgoes being too blunt in relationships, but it kinda shifted toward Virgoes giving people advice in general.

Uh...and Virgoes dealing with people in general 😛.

Guess that's what I get for starting in the middle, lol

But your insight was fully comprehensible..and intriguing. So, all in all, starting in the middle wasn't too bad for ya.

Would you say that, despite the differences, Pisceans are equipped to understand Virgoes pretty well?

"I'm just saying, complex problems don't always have simple, bottomline solutions. And there is rarely one person who deserves ALL the blame."

Wheels, that sounds almost like bitterness about a Virgo blaming you for something, since the word, "all" was capitalized. Is this coming from being scorned by a Virgo?

It seems that most times in my experience in life that problems are simplier than felt while going through it. In hindsight, my own stress and worry inflated the issue a million times . . often times, plan B would have worked if I had gotten over my own feelings long enough to look at another's perspective.

I guess it just depends on how a person chooses to view this. Some may see it as another person trying to tell them what to do when they think they are perfectly capable of handling their own issues. Others, choose to see it as having a partner in life who cares enough to offer assistance. Perhaps, the assistance offered isn't the solution, or even close to the answer to the problem . . but, they cared. They could have walked away and concerned themselves with something else.

My man offers advise, suggestions and direction all the time and I know that's it's because he loves me and wants to share in my life and wants to help me in whatever way he can . . it's NOT because he just wants to boss me around. I COULD look at it that way and become defensive, saying he's rude and tactless, this isn't his problem, why's he telling me what to do when he's not in the situation?

Our road is paved together . . not me plowing and him following, so, our problems are shared and conversed about as well.

Virgo's have tremendous insight . . people just have to understand that it takes them a while to ponder, they are in no way hasty. This is known by all, but then still complained about. Life about sharing and Virgo's are very generous with their hearts and protective of their partners feelings . . however, the partnerships HAS to be equal and experienced together. If one thinks they can pave the road ahead and leave the Virgo to walk in a line that is dictated to them . . then all is lost.

Pisceans understand all people. We get frustrated easily, but, we have the ability to empthasize.

In my belief, Pisces are very well suited with Virgo's because we want to walk side-by-side.

"Wheels, that sounds almost like bitterness about a Virgo blaming you for something, since the word, "all" was capitalized. Is this coming from being scorned by a Virgo?"

Sweetheart, I am not even going to pretend that I have not been scorned by a Virgo. But that statement was more directed towards branh, because he said that, 85% of the time, people create their own problems. That is partly true, but it's bad to look at a situation from only one angle.

"In hindsight, my own stress and worry inflated the issue a million times . . often times, plan B would have worked if I had gotten over my own feelings long enough to look at another's perspective."

That's exactly what I was referring to. The fact is, people DO let their emotions cloud their judgment...soooo often. Therefore, my point is, because of that fact, is it better to just hit them in the face with your objective opinion on issues which they may harbor complex emotions toward? When you give people advice, it's a good idea to remember that you may not be getting the WHOLE story (actually, it's pretty probably you won't). For this reason, I don't reject the ideas of sympathizing and empathizing. Unless you are a mind reader, of course, and then, by all means, tell people exactly what they have done wrong.

"Virgo's have tremendous insight . . people just have to understand that it takes them a while to ponder, they are in no way hasty."

I agree that they do have tremendous insight about the things that are clear-cut. But branh said earlier they are bad at sympathizing. Therefore, how can they provide insight when problems people have often have fuzzy areas that REQUIRE sympathy or empathy to fully understand?

It just bothers me when people believe their opinion about a situation is 100% correct. It seems more like passing judgment that way then honestly caring about what the person is going through.

Oh, and, yes I have been scorned by Virgoes, but I learned from it. I'm not bitter.

brahn,

my comments about virgos are more general than specific to you personally, however, they are pretty consistent among a pretty large number of virgos, as the testimonies of others can attest to.

"Virgos really aren't the type of people to go to if you want a lot of sympathey, because we only care about how to fix things. If you aren't interested in fixing your problem, then don't talk to a Virgo about it."

..who said anyone asked the virgo to fix anything? or even asked for their opinion? or that bitching is the only way that a "solution" can be delivered?


"Virgos may be the most opinionated sign in the zodiac."

umm..well I doubt that, but they ARE the sign that always seems to think that everyone else needs to HEAR their opinions.

SILENCE IS GOLDEN.

...and if your opinion is not going to produce a direct positive result outside your feeling better that you "got it off your chest", that's a HUGE clue that silence may have more value than your opinion at that moment....lol

"There is a difference between communicating effectively, and communicating and being liked."

lol....well, those of us who DO have people skills understand that a part of effective communication is people actually being receptive to what you have to say because they don't think you're an asshole. If they do, then you'll HAVE to be their boss for them to even want to listen..and even with that you will rarely get the best results out of them because they will resent you.

" I am no ones boss, but that is my mentality. People skills are superflous in about 95% of most work situations."

OMG...I rest my case. If that's what you think, I hope you're never anyone's boss. The boss who's an asshole is right at the top of things most people HATE about work next to being a shareholder of Enron lol. People skills is what gets you what you want in 99% of work situations. Even if you have power your workers will eventually rebel and send your operation down the tube if they don't feel they are treated with respect. Work---ESPECIALLY leadership---is all about getting people to WANT to do what you ask them to do because they respect you...no they don't always have to like you but the stereotypical virgo personality takes the "not being liked" deal WAY overboard to just plain bitchiness, as opposed to being firm. And even with that, the most successful bosses are liked AND get the respect of the people. What a concept! You can do both!

oh and by the way lol....I'm someone's boss. Last year my group was #1 in the district and I had a 92% favorable on the Employee Relations Index....the companywide goal is 78% favorable.

from.the.horses.mouth

Don't take something personal that wasn't intented on being a personal assault, and your feelings won't get hurt because they weren't suppose to. Sometimes, people tell you things that you NEED to hear and respect should be given to this Virgo who cares enough to want to help you "

Why do virgos always assume your feelings are hurt when you asked them to have more couth? Maybe the person's feelings are not hurt at all but they are still shaking their heads and thinking the V is a jerk.

And once again, what is this thing with V's thinking that THEIR opinion is perpetually something that we all "need"? lol....hilarious! That perception is completely inside their heads...and is dangerous....like the Pilgrims thought the native americans "needed" their brand of being "civlized"....and look at what THAT got them lol. When people feel that even when they piss on you its actually rain are dangerous because they are just that much more relentless and insistent with their actions

"If someone is in denial about something, then anything that brings attention to the truth is going to be interpred as an insult regardless of how much you pretty it up."

LOL...why do V's always think that its EVERYONE ELSE that's in denial when they are in denial about the necessity of their rudeness? ROTF......does anyone else see this crazy pattern?

"I didn't exactly beg to hear about someones issues. I know I personally don't present my issues to people unless I am ready to hear a real perspective or some type of solution."

funny thing is, people are exactly begging Virgos for their opinions either. Yet, they appear!

are = aren't in last post

"Virgos don't like criticizing."

Yeah and bird don't like sh!tting but they do it all the time without fail and it makes a mess over and over and over...lol

"In my belief, Pisces are very well suited with Virgo's because we want to walk side-by-side."

nah, Pisces are just easy going enough to be able to put up with virgo's butter more than most...same with cancers

well being that my mother and few close friends are virgos I can say I care about several, but that doesn't make an analysis of their average personalities any less valid....mom is on the cusp though, so she's actually very easy to get along with.

lol,

as soon as another relationship fails . . the rants will be about whatever sign that person is . . example of detached feelings.

Nothing to do with Virgo at all . . just put ALL the blame on the person who scorned you and then bitch because that person is blaming you . . lol, idiocy

actually not true....I've always thought this about most virgos.....and I wasn't scorned, I dumped the virgo. When you live with someone you get a pretty up close and personal account of how they operate.....and you won't find much of what I said that isn't at least somewhat consistent with virgos in general. Lastly I was in a relationship directly after with a Pisces.....wonderful person....just didn't work out. Idiocy? No. Straight-forward and pretty accurate on a large cross-section? You bet.

Have you ever stopped to think that maybe it's you? Because I don't see where you've described Virgo's in general, at all. What I do see is that you put all blame on the Virgo, when in fact, there are two people in a relationship.

People aren't exactly begging for your opinions either. . and, yet, they appear.

I'm thinking it's just you who is difficult to deal with . . you are blind to that, so naturally, it's the other persons fault.

Lived with Virgo's for a very long time and I can't relate to what you are saying about them at all. If you knew them at all, even slightly . . you'd KNOW that they don't like to critisize . . and they are appalled by rudeness.

lol

When did I mention the relationship in my posts? I was talking about the stereotypical virgo personality, and one or two aspects of it in particular..then I responded to quotes about those one or two areas....and there have been several "amen's" from others who have dealt with virgos on this very post. So no, its not "just me". My analysis of that personality is independent of my personal interaction and in fact mirrored the experiences that others have had. On the other hand, I've spoken very well of them in the areas that they deserved it, so its not like I've made them all bad. I also have not sugar-coated weak spots that tend to be a trend in some of them. I never said that it had to be YOUR experience.

And as far as them them "not liking" to criticize, I've already addressed that. Even if that's true it doesn't stop many of them (not all) from doing it incessantly, and you can find this testified all over the internet on just about any astrological page....as well as posts by those who've dealt with them. And as far as their aversion to rudeness, you may want to read the title of this thread. You may also want to read a few of the first responses and note that several people had this opinion completely independent of me.

...and as far as me being "difficult to deal with" the virgo themselves admitted that I was the most temperant person that they dated and had a high tolerance for their admitted high-strung nature. This is also the reason that I am the only person they've been in a relationship with that lasted more than 2 months in the 40 years they've been alive.


knowledge.of.facts.should.proceed.proclamations.

Virgos do critize AND don't like being critized. You should hear my mother when she's behind the wheel. Does nothing but bitch from home to destination and back. I guess it's a good thing for her I'm a Pisces since I just ignore it.