Posted by Lostthoughts

Posted by Gem03
You wanna know what's funny? He came back on Friday from Miami then we first talked on Saturday.
Him: "I miss you too"
Me: "Come see me you know my address"
Him: "Lol do you not care about the 14 day quarantine thing? I like you so I will stay away"

Sunday: I send him that wall of text being like lets take space and I'm letting go of my feelings
Monday: This man drives an hour, half blind from his eye appointment to come see me.

I let him come, I wanted the last time we hung out to be a decent memory. We cuddled and kissed. It was obvious he wanted to mend things and have me forget about taking space. Before he left I said those things in person to him so they are permanent and I am able to let go.

Like less than 24 hours ago you were concerned about the damned 14 day quarantine??? WHAT happened

- Taking things for granted
- Not knowing what something means to you until it's gone.
- Being obvious to your own feelings or ignoring them.
Heart vs. Mind
- Motivation and attachment level

If someone is not interested or doesn't want to put in the effort that is ASKED for...actions speak louder then words yes?
If you don't learn how to value and maintain healthy relationships you want earlier in life then you learn the things above the hard way though lose later....Or grow jaded🙃
To be fair woman pull the same shit too. I know your just venting but I still want to point that out. No one is innocence of this.

That being said, what stood out to me regarding your story was him driving "...hour, half blind from his eye appointment to come see me." That isn't a normal action under those conditions. He obviously did care because that isn't a low effort action. The fact he did that and you still continued to break up means to me, the level of interest/attachment on your end wasn't stronger then the transgressions or your needs/expectations of him. I question your interest and desire for him in the first place. Most people would see that and give them another chance. Is this true or were their other things bothering you besides this?

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If you wanna entertain yourself with an emotional rollercoaster here's the FULL detailed story: https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/virgo/virgo-sun-moon-man-i-dont-know-what-to-do-14544917/?p=7

The gist is this:

We were friends for years. It started early 2020 we had a talking stage it didn’t work out so we stayed friends but we both had feelings for each other in October he told me he loved me and asked me if I loved him. I said no then a week later I cut him off bc it wasn’t going anywhere. He came back after 3 weeks of no contact. We stay somewhat more than friends, he says he isn’t ready for a relationship and he is a bit cold to me. But I let it be. Then in January 2021 he wanted to try talking again.

March 15: He asks me to be his girl i say yes
March 17: he takes it back, he wants to be left alone and says he isn’t ready.
(I didn’t do anything btw, we were cool even after March 15)

March 21: he is on a plane flying out to Miami with only 3 other female friends (Girl A,B,C). A trip he NEVER told me about.

He posts a pic of him and Girl A sitting close at a restaurant. I look at his insta and Girl A posted that same pic on her insta and tagged him. 1 of his closest friends commented “Fav couple”, another friend commented “BEAUTY AND THE BEAST”. I checked Girl B and Girl C's insta, they didn't have pictures with him there. Also he has female and male friends (which i have no problem with) but he has NEVER posted a pic like that and then SHE posts the same thing there. Like nah. All while him and I aren’t talking. I won't compete for a man. Also the most unattractive trait in a man is fickleness.
Last Friday he came back and hit me up. I replied on Saturday. He didn't even want to hang out with me. Him and I have a habit of sending flirty memes back and forth. Even that wasn't there like?

He has virgo sun+moon+mercury+venus with mars leo. I know what its like when an Earth sign man likes you. He won't go over the top or be dramatic. But you won't be able to question his feelings for you. In his gaze, his actions, and his words. Its all there. But this wasn't it.

That is assuming I'd have feelings for him by the time he comes around and is ready lol. I impulsively cut him off in October and he came back 3 weeks later. But I know he is good at icing people out with no care. I really have no clue, he's complex.

What triggered me to let go is the pic he posted of him and his female "friend" AND the fact that he said he wanted to be with me then 2 DAYS later he takes it back.

I went on instagram and she posted that same picture on her instagram, tagging him, saying "ya bestie could never". I looked at the comments and 1 of his best friends said "fav couple", another friend said "BEAUTY AND THE BEAST". But when I asked about her he referred to her as a friend. Also there is nothing more unattractive than a man who is fickle.

I don't have time for games. If I have to chase you then you do not want me. If there is another woman you are entertaining while talking to me I will leave. She can have you and I say that with the utmost peaceful and good intentions. No toxicity, no fighting. Just peace.

You wanna know what's funny? He came back on Friday from Miami then we first talked on Saturday.
Him: "I miss you too"
Me: "Come see me you know my address"
Him: "Lol do you not care about the 14 day quarantine thing? I like you so I will stay away"

Sunday: I send him that wall of text being like lets take space and I'm letting go of my feelings
Monday: This man drives an hour, half blind from his eye appointment to come see me.

I let him come, I wanted the last time we hung out to be a decent memory. We cuddled and kissed. It was obvious he wanted to mend things and have me forget about taking space. Before he left I said those things in person to him so they are permanent and I am able to let go.

Like less than 24 hours ago you were concerned about the damned 14 day quarantine??? WHAT happened

You wanna know what's funny? He came back on Friday from Miami then we first talked on Saturday.
Him: "I miss you too"
Me: "Come see me you know my address"
Him: "Lol do you not care about the 14 day quarantine thing? I like you so I will stay away"

*Sunday night I send him that wall of text and being like space is good and I'm letting go of my feelings*
Monday afternoon he had an eye appointment at 1pm and they put some drops in his eyes so he was kinda half blind while driving yet right after drove an hour to come see me.
I let him come, I wanted the last time we hung out to be a decent memory. We cuddled and kissed. It was obvious he wanted to mend things and have me forget about taking space. Before he left I said those things in person to him so they are permanent and I am able to let go.

Why do men do the most only when you are about to leave??

he is a yo-yo not a man

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by Gem03

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by Gem03
His response: "This is why I can't ever hurt you. You're literally the best person I know. I have a huge fear of commitment. I need to know everything about the person. I still treat you like my top priority that hasn't changed. You are ready but I am still warming up"
We talked some more but I am basically letting go.

Nothing says, "top priority" like telling someone your ready for a relationship and then a few days later backpedaling. Smh. Yeah definitely not hurtful at all to be led on like that... *rolls eyes

Your too nice and still prioritizing his feelings over your own. All he gives you is lip service and performance art. His actions tell a different story.

I hope you can truly move on and invest in someone who has the same end goal as you.

Thank you I am back on the market so YAY
Correct....I thought about what kind of person I am. I didn't wanna be toxic or fight, thats beneath me I am grown not in high school. I will also not sit around and teach a man how to treat me. Either treat me right or get left lol

I feel you on trying to remain above the toxicity and be kind.
But at the same time you literally told him you are leaving the door open to the possibility of a future in the future.
Which is telling him he can act the fool, treat you as an option, and literally you will still be an option "in the future".
I guess I'm just a more brutal person lol. I've literally told dudes in the past that x, y, and z is why you blew it and I hope you can absorb this information and figure out your shit before doing this to the next girl. Because your gonna end up with the same outcome.

click to expand

At the end of the day, I don't hate him. He is emotionally unavailable and 22 years old so he's gonna act like a fool. The future thing also depends on me as much as it does on him. Maybe I'll have found the love of my life by the time he comes around lol who knows.

Last virgo man I ever look at lol. At one point in our convo he was like "I'm so surprised by how you are bc I always think I'm a horrible person" I was like dude what? But whatever. I won't keep a man who doesn't want me lol

I will never chase a man or compete for one. His loss bc I cared about him from such a deep place. I wanted nothing more than to give this man everything and if thats not good enough for him then I walk. I'm not going to try and CONVINCE you of my value, if you don't see it then goodbye.

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by Gem03
His response: "This is why I can't ever hurt you. You're literally the best person I know. I have a huge fear of commitment. I need to know everything about the person. I still treat you like my top priority that hasn't changed. You are ready but I am still warming up"
We talked some more but I am basically letting go.

Nothing says, "top priority" like telling someone your ready for a relationship and then a few days later backpedaling. Smh. Yeah definitely not hurtful at all to be led on like that... *rolls eyes

Your too nice and still prioritizing his feelings over your own. All he gives you is lip service and performance art. His actions tell a different story.

I hope you can truly move on and invest in someone who has the same end goal as you.

click to expand

Thank you I am back on the market so YAY
Correct....I thought about what kind of person I am. I didn't wanna be toxic or fight, thats beneath me I am grown not in high school. I will also not sit around and teach a man how to treat me. Either treat me right or get left lol

Posted by pisceanloves

Posted by Gem03

Posted by pisceanloves
For some reason I don't trust a man that has "many" female friends. Sounds sketchy
Virgo men tend to not know what they want and they give and take their words as they please..
I had a similar experience with a heavy Virgo man, recently..

This is the last virgo man I will ever deal with :/

He acts more like an indecisive air sign than a grounded earth sign. I'm over it...what happened with yours?

Couldn't make up his mind about what he wanted. Giving silent treatment each time he disliked something. Would avoid disagreement at all cost. Wouldn't show up when you needed him the most. Huge, very fragile ego.
Would drive the most secure person to insecure. Would avoid making promises. When I held him accountable for something he did wrong - I got blocked. Then unblocked, then I tried to find out where I stood - I got blocked again. Would never apologize. I only heard him saying sorry once in our 2+ years relationship or whatever that was. I got sick of constantly walking on eggshells.

Also even tho there was no official "break up" - he blames me for that. As it turns out he misunderstood my question "if it was over" for a statement that it was over! (?)

Huh???
His sh***y behavior was telling me he wanted out so I generously gave him a permission to speak his mind. He implied that as me saying we were done.. What the actual hell you tell me.

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I am so sorry you had to go through that thats awful

Um I chose to gracefully let go. I sent him this:

"I thought about everything. More than my feelings for you, I truly appreciate you. You’ve been there for me when I needed you and without judgment.

I want you to be happy, be safe and 100% sure when/if you enter a relationship (be it me or anyone else). Issue is I fell for you, hard. Your heart isn’t into it and you have a major fear of commitment. While I want someone who is 100% all in with me. I will only enter a relationship if we are both all in. If not then its a useless title. You are not in a mindset where you can give me that and that is okay. That is valid.

My intent was never to force something. I didn’t pick up on how emotionally taxing it was for you.

Right now you and I want different things for ourselves. I remember how you brought up that you were worried i might hate you if things don’t work out. I am not upset or angry with you and I could never hate you. I want nothing more than for you to be happy. Honesty and communication go a long way with me. I’d like to think you’ve been honest with me and thats what I respect the most.

I just want you to know. If we find our way back to each other later on (10 weeks, a month or couple months)…in a relationship with each other or just as platonic friends, thats okay too. Im leaving the door open. There are exactly 3 people in my life I was able to open up to, you’re 1 of them. So, I’m hoping we do. For now I think both of us could use space from each other. Let me know what you think."

His response: "This is why I can't ever hurt you. You're literally the best person I know. I have a huge fear of commitment. I need to know everything about the person. I still treat you like my top priority that hasn't changed. You are ready but I am still warming up"
We talked some more but I am basically letting go.

I found out that she posted the same pic on her instagram and tagged him....1 of his friend commented "fav couple".

He came back on friday and hit me up. He said "How are you?" I said im okay. We made small talk then I casually poked at the pic and was like "Imma need your friend's skincare routine lmao" (he knows I'm obsessed with skincare and haircare. He replied with "My friends skincare routine is makeup and photoshop lmao...I legit saw her put makeup on and photoshop it. Its all smoke and mirrors." He referred to her as his friend

I brought up the stuff he told me (lovey dovey shit) and how he agreed to be with me. He said "I was confused then but I run from commitment thats all." I asked if he wanted to hang out he said he missed me and how important doing activities together is. He said "I was thinking about that too but something is holding me back". I asked " what is holding you back?" he said "Beats me."

Im opening up my options rn....my major flaw is when Im in a talking stage I drop my options I'm loyal without a title. Never again.

I actually don't blame OP....the most responsible party here is the shitty ass man.

He is an immature leo, can we stop blaming the other woman all the time?? Like why not let these grown ass men take accountability for once.

So he posted a picture of him and one of the girls sitting together for lunch.....the other 2 were also there but I feel sad

Posted by pisceanloves
For some reason I don't trust a man that has "many" female friends. Sounds sketchy
Virgo men tend to not know what they want and they give and take their words as they please..
I had a similar experience with a heavy Virgo man, recently..

This is the last virgo man I will ever deal with :/

He acts more like an indecisive air sign than a grounded earth sign. I'm over it...what happened with yours?

Yeah Im not contacting him, theres no point

Posted by saggurl88

Posted by Gem03

Posted by saggurl88

Posted by Gem03

Posted by saggurl88

Posted by Gem03
Virgo men please shed some light

This is what some Virgo men do for some reason. They see how much bullshit you will put up with, see if you will wait for them while they do what they want, and the one who waits for them wins because no one else will put up with it and stay. They try and put you through the ringer as a test to judge your loyalty.

You should leave him alone and do you, he clearly got an opportunity that he didn't want to pass up, so he changed his mind and bounced out to spring break for some fun.

He'll be back once things blow over with whoever he was liking, once they stop paying attention to him.

Virgo men get distracted easily by woman. They are the same as Leo men with wanting attention and wanting to be adored but at least Leo's are known for being loyal.
They want a women going bat shit crazy with jealousy for them while they do this sort of shit and if you don't, that means you don't care.
Virgo men live in the moment and take opportunities as they come, I find them to be very sneaky and manipulative, while seeming innocent.
They have the gift of gab just like a Gemini, and are smooth talkers who can get themselves out of any situation with their charm.

I still like them, I just can't hang with how attention seeking they are towards anyone showing them interest. I'm not jealous enough to compete.

He has leo mars. But everything else is in Virgo.

Thats what I'm thinking too...like in a span of 4 days he was in Miami...he definitely had to have talked to his friends. Arranged where they are staying, put in notice for work and so on. At the minimum he had to have been thinking about it for the last week.

Him and I had a thorough convo of what we are like in relationships, both of us are very very possessive of our SO. So there was no way I was going to let him go with 3 women while I'm his SO (same applies to me).

This is why Cancer and Aries women work best with them, because they fight for their men when they behave like this.
I don't have time to run after community dick and try to make it mine.

I am quiet for now but Im not letting it slide, thats for sure.
"No, you can’t make me yours then take it all back after 2 days. Hop on a plane with only 3 other women to Miami exactly four days later and expect things to be okay between us. I'd fight for you but I won't chase after you." is what I plan on saying.

If his male friends were there I'd be like ok whatever. Its a group thing; he is extroverted and likes hanging out in groups. But its HIM and only 3 other women is not cool to me.

Well you can voice your opinion on it. But he broke up with you. Did what he wanted and even though you voice your displeasure, will come back and you will have open arms.
So I’m not sure what the point is.
He may come back after the other women have stopped contacting or if you are more fun. You just can’t tell. It’s whoever has his attention, in his presence.
So the choice is yours on what you want to do.

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I don’t think I’ll have open arms this time lol. The sole reason Im giving him 3 weeks is because he gave me that much when I cut him off (impulsively) as well.
I have a soft spot for him but there is only so much I can let slide. Really 4 days??? Not even a month??
Also the women he went with are his friends that much Im sure of. They aren’t random nor are they his exes

Posted by saggurl88

Posted by Gem03

Posted by saggurl88

Posted by Gem03
Virgo men please shed some light

This is what some Virgo men do for some reason. They see how much bullshit you will put up with, see if you will wait for them while they do what they want, and the one who waits for them wins because no one else will put up with it and stay. They try and put you through the ringer as a test to judge your loyalty.

You should leave him alone and do you, he clearly got an opportunity that he didn't want to pass up, so he changed his mind and bounced out to spring break for some fun.

He'll be back once things blow over with whoever he was liking, once they stop paying attention to him.

Virgo men get distracted easily by woman. They are the same as Leo men with wanting attention and wanting to be adored but at least Leo's are known for being loyal.
They want a women going bat shit crazy with jealousy for them while they do this sort of shit and if you don't, that means you don't care.
Virgo men live in the moment and take opportunities as they come, I find them to be very sneaky and manipulative, while seeming innocent.
They have the gift of gab just like a Gemini, and are smooth talkers who can get themselves out of any situation with their charm.

I still like them, I just can't hang with how attention seeking they are towards anyone showing them interest. I'm not jealous enough to compete.

He has leo mars. But everything else is in Virgo.

Thats what I'm thinking too...like in a span of 4 days he was in Miami...he definitely had to have talked to his friends. Arranged where they are staying, put in notice for work and so on. At the minimum he had to have been thinking about it for the last week.

Him and I had a thorough convo of what we are like in relationships, both of us are very very possessive of our SO. So there was no way I was going to let him go with 3 women while I'm his SO (same applies to me).

This is why Cancer and Aries women work best with them, because they fight for their men when they behave like this.
I don't have time to run after community dick and try to make it mine.

click to expand

I am quiet for now but Im not letting it slide, thats for sure.
"No, you can’t make me yours then take it all back after 2 days. Hop on a plane with only 3 other women to Miami exactly four days later and expect things to be okay between us. I'd fight for you but I won't chase after you." is what I plan on saying.

If his male friends were there I'd be like ok whatever. Its a group thing; he is extroverted and likes hanging out in groups. But its HIM and only 3 other women is not cool to me.

Posted by saggurl88

Posted by Gem03
Virgo men please shed some light

This is what some Virgo men do for some reason. They see how much bullshit you will put up with, see if you will wait for them while they do what they want, and the one who waits for them wins because no one else will put up with it and stay. They try and put you through the ringer as a test to judge your loyalty.

You should leave him alone and do you, he clearly got an opportunity that he didn't want to pass up, so he changed his mind and bounced out to spring break for some fun.

He'll be back once things blow over with whoever he was liking, once they stop paying attention to him.

Virgo men get distracted easily by woman. They are the same as Leo men with wanting attention and wanting to be adored but at least Leo's are known for being loyal.
They want a women going bat shit crazy with jealousy for them while they do this sort of shit and if you don't, that means you don't care.
Virgo men live in the moment and take opportunities as they come, I find them to be very sneaky and manipulative, while seeming innocent.
They have the gift of gab just like a Gemini, and are smooth talkers who can get themselves out of any situation with their charm.

I still like them, I just can't hang with how attention seeking they are towards anyone showing them interest. I'm not jealous enough to compete.

click to expand

He has leo mars. But everything else is in Virgo.

Thats what I'm thinking too...like in a span of 4 days he was in Miami...he definitely had to have talked to his friends. Arranged where they are staying, put in notice for work and so on. At the minimum he had to have been thinking about it for the last week.

Him and I had a thorough convo of what we are like in relationships, both of us are very very possessive of our SO. So there was no way I was going to let him go with 3 women while I'm his SO (same applies to me).

I love mars virgo, mars leo is trash tho