Aqualady Hearts Aqua Man

Long time lurker but haven't posted anything in YEARS so ::waves:: hey everyone!

I have a dilemma that I would love thoughts on....sorry its long.

A little history: My aqua was in a 5 year live-in + kid relationship (cancer lady) until this summer when he moved out. In September we reconnect after not seeing each other for 10 years. Platonic friends for about 2 years in high school.
His story was she wanted to get married he didn't and they argued/fought too much in front of the kid so he left. He was still very active in the child??s life and would spend time with him at the ex??s home until she would arrive from work.

Anyway, things between us started off great! The most amazing man I've met in life! We would spend at least 3 days a week together or would talk/text every single day. What I loved about him was that I didn't have to initiate anything ??_not once in 5 months.

In Jan his son's mom threatened to move out of state with his kid. I immediately knew it was emotional manipulation and to expect my aqua to become distant because of frustration. She also began to bad mouth him on social media for all his friends and family to see. When he would spend time with his son, the child treated him so bad and would say he hated him & would physically fight him. He began to try to develop a relationship with his son outside of her home but his son became very violent(a 4 y/o!). When I would see or talk to him I could tell he was distressed.

There was a 10 day span during that time where I didn't see him so I had to ASK for some time (1st time ever). This was the precursor for the —just friends?? conversation and him distancing himself. He still continued to call/text everyday but I didn't see him as often (once a week).

Over the last week or so he has been in sabotage mode telling me about other women he's met and finds attractive, encounters with females that typically make a woman jealous, and sending me taboo topics via text??_I am an Aquarius as well so I showed no emotion and remained objective since we are —just friends??! But yesterday after thinking on it for a few days I decided to let him off the hook. Sensing that he may be trying to make things work for the sake of his son and trying to push me away, I decided to end it via text stating I could not handle the friendship and that he doesn't have to contact me...he didn't acknowledge.

So, of course the next day I got weak and I followed up with an email explaining my reasoning and that if his intention was not to push, I would like to remain friends. He agreed with a smiley face. Now I feel like I??ve messed up a good thing. We didn't converse yesterday and he hasn't said a word today. I am so sad! I know I??ve sent up red flags but how do I bring them down?

Additionally, this relationship with his son??s mom seems taxing. It has been violent in the past and he's asked me should he marry to justify keeping custody of the kid if she tries to move. He's at the point where if she says —Make sure he brushes his teeth?? aqua man is irritated. I know this feeling??_I typically deeply resent the person by then. However, they have history??_they have a son that he loves very much. Do you think aqua man will stay in a relationship for their child? How long would he try to make it work? Does it take extremes for an aqua man to consider a relationship to be toxic? Please help??_

Is he on the child's birth certificate as the father?

I ask because if they aren't married, he may not necessarily be on the birth certificate, thus harder to prove parental rights. If he is, then he can take her to court and fight against her taking the child out of state.

I know this isn't your question, but he may feel better if he knows he has options.

Trucap, its funny you asked. He once told me that when his son was born he didn't sign the birth certificate because he didn't believe the child was his. Once he had a DNA test I don't believe he ever had himself added. However, he was asking me should he marry someone else to justify keeping his son...not the mom.

I always wondered why he made that statement because it's illegal to take a child out of state if both parents have not consented.

I too think he is unaware of his rights and unsure how to proceed.

lawyer time! To answer your question could an aqua stay for the kids YES!! As a friend offer to be supportive put you and him on the back burner for abit. He will see that you're a loyal true friend and there isnt a higher honor to an aqua than that.