Aquarius Love/ I'm sorry letter. (Page 2)

Thank you all for the insight. Freebird I remember him saying one time that he's not shooting juice, but i dont think he would admit it if it were true.



Water or Oral Defenses - fear of abandonment can lead to depression and the need to escape. Water signs, Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces and planets Moon, Pluto and Neptune have a very tender physical body which is caused by unfulfilled emotional needs. They suffer emotional rejection worse than Fire signs by internalising and converting the emotional pain into physical symptoms. The Moon needs to be needed and is susceptible to being ignored and thus abandoned, to prevent this they manipulate and blackmail those around them to stay needed. Pluto controls through emotional blackmail too. Pluto type people are dependant on their partners, it becomes very hard to reject these Plutonians because it is flattering to be so needed and desired, but the emotional roller-coaster and jealousy can become too much. Neptune escapes when abandoned, they are not involved with blackmail, but do control covertly through illness and abandoning their physical needs - eating, drinking and personal care. Neptunians manifest emotional illnesses such as asthma, Multiple Sclerosis and other nervous disorders when they don?t address their emotional needs. They simply convert their emotional pain into physical pain and gain some attention by being constantly sick. Their other manifestations are psychological, depression, anxiety, panic attacks, and even forms of delusional paranoid schizophrenia. They control by adapting to their situation, but risk losing their ?soul? in the process.

Relationships are another symptom, water signs need to be loved and will exist in all forms of abusive relationships just to experience affection. It is said, ?Women swap sex for love while men swap love for sex.? Don?t think that men are the only perpetrators of domestic violence and abuse. Abuse comes in many forms, emotional abuse and neglect are common feminine forms of abuse. It has been said that men act out when hurt, they become physically and overtly violent and abusive. Women on the other hand become covertly abusive (?secret, hidden?), they use emotional abuse and neglect more than men. Because a bruise is visible proof of abuse we tend to focus on physical abuse as the only form of domestic violence, don?t fall into that trap, males and females abuse equally but in different ways.

Did you know that men and women who feel the most abandoned are the greatest perpetrators of violence? Think about it, a strong water chart (abandonment) with a strongly placed Pluto, Mars or an Aries Moon can be explosive. If you see abandonment in a chart look also for overt or covert abuse in their relationships. The common alcoholic or gambler is of this origin.

Water signs control covertly, hidden control, by withdrawing emotion and then giving it back when it suits them. This is a great way to control someone with a weak self-esteem, tell them you love them and then hurt them. Initially we seek love and praise, but become confused when hurt. We still desire our partner?s love and praise because we are made to feel so special, so we end up staying in the abusive relationship. Just watch married couples who do this - when things go right they are very loving, but when one wants something they withdraw affection and become cold until they get what they want

only an air sign would describe that as if water signs can be so detached and controlling with thier emotions. some might but my emotions are not planned out or for gain...i feel first then i can analize it. my libra with a cancer moon was like that though....very manipulative.

Blueaqua

Your descrpition is perfect example of how Air signs perceive Water signs. NO! I haven't seen any Water Sign acting like that. I will talk only for myself and not the rest of water signs. We just want to have what people are agreed to do. Only that. Otherwise, those pepople wouldn't be the people whom we supposed to care about. They would be strangers for us and that would mean end of any relationship. Until that happens we simply want what we supposed to get, if not then bye bye.

People get clingy,maniplutive and insecure becasue they don't trust people is what im getting at,that IS what it is not the "other" person having trusting problems.As in someone you've only been dating for only a little while doesn't call you for whole,lousy 3 days without any agreement to do so,you get-"I thought I lost you",why,because you want them to feel guilty for something thats in YOUR head thats supposedly "a hit" at thier feelings.Theres psychological problems in that,sure maybe its just the steroid thing that may be possible with that scorp guy but still the same when you don't have any other possibility.Low self esteem,insecurities ARE pscyhological problems not real ones.The people that do it aren't even aware of it because its what they do 24/7 and need a psychologist to get through to them that self esteem is a GOOD thing for themselves.

People are insecure,clingy and maniplutive because they are afraid they aren't "loved",are going to be "left",afraid of being "cheated on",they think they're "unattractive",they think "noone likes them",etc.list goes on and on for the so called "reasons" for an insecure person.

Exactly Tiamat. She does not trust him. But is this the real problem here? NO. You see, she does not trust him becase HE does not work on building it. Just by walking away without leaving any kind of explaination is a biggest way of destroying any kind of trust. Not just with people you are in relationship, but with all people in general. Therefore, this girl partially a victim, because she is forced to figure him out. She is forcibly left with all kinds of possibilities to figure out. I can call this as a mind game as well ya know? If you leave a person to think many things about you while care about you, this is PSYCHOLOGICAL torture of its kind. You can call it whatever you like; being free or having own will etc etc, BUT when you agreed with a person to be in some level of relationship, you also take some RESPONSIBILITY to deal with. Building trust is part of that responsibility. Otherwise, those two people are just not in any kind of relationship IMHO.

"As in someone you've only been dating for only a little while doesn't call you for whole,lousy 3 days without any agreement to do so,you get-"I thought I lost you",why,because you want them to feel guilty for something thats in YOUR head thats supposedly "a hit" at thier feelings."

I don't think this is a call for making someone feel quilty. I see this as a reminder of undone homework of resposibility relating on your part. You might see this as psychological problem, but I see this as a sign that this person cares for you. If this person wouldn't speak with you like that, then I would start to think that this person actually doesn't care whereither you call him or not. What about that?

Insecurities, clinginess and manipulative behaviours also could be stimulated from outside by just leaving this person QUESSING. Does that make this person crazy?

" Lack of trust cases people being insecure, clingy and manipulative (depending on persons wishes) not the other way."

By this statement I mean that lack of trust in one person causes again THIS person to be clingy, insecure etc. Not being insecure, clingy and manipulative causes lack of trust (At least not always, therefore less accurate assesment of state that this person is actually resides in).

"People are insecure,clingy and maniplutive because they are afraid they aren't "loved",are going to be "left",afraid of being "cheated on",they think they're "unattractive",they think "noone likes them",etc.list goes on and on for the so called "reasons" for an insecure person."

They just try to figure out the situation that they are ended up in. This kind of complains are just "unconscious" outburst of reality that they "know" that they in but don't know how to define it.

Haffo,look at her pic,if it was reality about her insecurity shes be unattractive okay,sure shes not no cookie cutter super model looking person but is she unattractive?NO,she shouldn't need reassurance(ex:I want to hear im beautiful) if she really knew it,was looking at it realistically and was confidant.

I have ZERO clue as to if you're talking about me there.. but I do have a picture, and no I'm not unattractive in my mind, or neither a super model. I'm average..

So, you're saying that just because I believe I'm attractive I shouldn't need the person I'm with to reassure me that HE thinks so. I don't want to be with some one who thinks I'm ugly.

Some people stay with some one even though, physically, they're not attracted. I don't want that. I am a superficial person sometimes, I'll admit, and I'd rather be with some one who thinks I'm beautiful/sexy. I don't want some one who thinks I'm not sexy and a dog.

Get it?

After getting out of the shower the looks he gives when your wandering around,if he gropes you alot,wake up in the middle of the night to find him watching you as you sleep,etc.theres alot of subtle things that make it obvious.I've only "heard" it maybe twice but still know just because of my bf's antics,hes a twinkly eyed,sly grinner type,hes more likely to show it through being goofy rather than romantic.

But then again I also balk at hearing it when I do hear it in most cases because the people usually saying it are just trying to get laid.

After I get out of the shower, and I "roam around", I'll catch him looking at my rear end.... haha.. I know he likes my body, but what about my face??

Generally smiling is a good indicater but usually only in the first stages of the relationship,ya know the butterflies and stuff makes you gitty so its hard to hold back.Staring or gazing,maybe a look away and try to act "cool" for the shyer types of guys,theres alot of books on the subject supposedly but I never read any of them.Basically for myself you could say its just "intuition" or whatever is the "reason" I can feel what the other is by thier facial expressions,its only here that I've ever heard "scorps" are supposed to be human lie detectors for being able to read faces though lol,it is just always what I did so don't know exact details for everything.Guess one of the things to look for is put yourself in his position and see if maybe he does certain things you find yourself doing when thinking along those lines to find them.

Yeah Tiamat (though I left last convo since I got my answer, No hard feelings Ok?)

All those "intuition" shapes general picture about a person in questioning which at the end comes out as simple answer like "yes" or "no". It's hard to explain how picture shaped since you generally are not aware how it shaped in the first place. Yes you know what constitues it, but you cannot shape it into words because it's too complex.

lol,no hard feelings haffo,we're just debating is how I sees this one.Yeah,its just a feeling that you just know,basically someone would have to see it themselves to know what its a referance to alot of the time even then might not.🙂

Anyhoo steph,I found these on yahoo search for body language,theres alot of other sites that came up too.


? Raised eyebrows
When a person of any culture, race, social standing and gender sees someone who he (or she) is attracted to, he will raise his eyebrows briefly. This quick (about 1/5 of a second) cue is a sure sign of attraction, and if you're quick enough to catch it, your dating woes will be over.

? The eyes have it
Eyes in general have some tales to tell. Dilated pupils definitely signal attraction. Also, an 'open' face (which includes raised eyebrows, flared nostrils and slightly parted lips) is yet another sign of attraction and interest.

? The mouth can speak without saying a word
A person will unconsciously draw attention to his mouth, lips and chin by touching these areas, licking her lips, or just fidgeting with them. It is a sign of attraction, although lip chewing can often be perceived as a sign of nervousness and possibly dishonesty.

? Mirroring
If the person you are talking to is imitating your body movements and postures, it is a sign that he or she is interested in you and would at least like to be friends.

? Playing with the hair
If a person is touching his or her hair it shows attraction and a sub-conscious desire to be sure that they are looking attractive. The exception to this rule is if the person is twirling or tugging at the hair, which indicates impatience and frustration.

Thank you guys. that was very interesting!

I have another "dilemma". I have been seriously thinking of leaving him. Even unconsciously. (I'll catch myself thinking about it). I don't sit there and ponder when and how I'll do it, but I'll catch myself wanting to leave.

I just don't know if I should give it another try or not. Staying together doesn't seem like it's helping either of us emotionally.

Esp not me.

He hurts me a lot emotionally, almost everyday. My co-workers think I should leave as well.

Sit down and figure it out to know what you should do,maybe a pro/con list to help it out.

I am getting in contact with the Job Corps program.

www.yahoo.com search: Job Corps