i know this is probably going to sound strange...

but this is something i have been wondering about for a while. i asked people i know but they give me...uhhh...pretty uniform answers that show little thought. 😛

ok so basically...if a woman is sexual, is she automatically a whore? for instance, if she embraces her sexuality and isn't ashamed of her experiences.

i tend to think there is a difference between being a sexual person and being a whore. but i don't really know where the line is. i get sick of women who don't hide their sexuality being labeled as sluts (and i'm not talking about the christina aguilera types - that's just skanky 😛).

but really...if a single woman once in a while actively pursues sex...i don't think she should be labeled as a whore...i don't know, to me it just seems like she has a healthy appetite...

WHAT THE HELL DXP!

All I say is understand what your doing. KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT! Understand all said consequences as well as benefits.

haha umm hi my face?

i wasn't necessarily referring to myself. and i'm not advocating sleeping around. it's just a general question...should a woman be negatively labeled if she shows she has a high libido?

It doesn't sound strange at all Wheels. I think there is a floating line between being a slut and satisfying a healthy sexual appetite. I think this line shifts according to what type of group within which you happen to be discussing this question. One extreme will brand any woman who has sex outside marriage as a slut or a loose woman. At the other end of the scale you have the likes of Paris Hilton who gains noteriety and some acclaim for wearing no knickers and being a shameless sexual siren.
Then there's the people in the middle who are not sure what they should hide and what they should reveal about their sex lives or sexual persuits and fantasies in order to be accepted and be deemed "normal". I'd be in the middle range myself.

My own opinion is that I classify a woman as a slut if does not let marriage or other people's feeling affect or deter here from her persuit of her own sexual gratification. So she will cheat on her own partner and or sleep with another woman's husband without caring about the acceptibility of it.

I consider a single woman who confidently sleeps with other men she feels sexually or emotionally attracted to without having any qualms or hesitation or worries about what other may think of her as a liberated woman who is just relating to and expressing herself sexually.

Lady M you didn't actually respond to the question that Wheelhomes posed.

I know it wasnt you really.
Im just saying in order for a woman NOT to be considered a 'slut'...those are the requirements.

hahaha...i call christina a skank because she is! not classy AT ALL. (although, to be fair, she is now trying.)

"Who would you label a slut?"

that's why i asked the question, because i don't really know...

i guess i kind of agree with mellowdee too...the kind of woman who will cheat and disregards how her actions affect others. but then there are women who i still consider slutty, even if they are single and don't aid in cheating. they just sleep with A LOT of people.

Maybe they are just carrying out an innate sexual drive in them at that particular stage in their life which makes them screw around a lot. Perhaps this experience leads to them developing a healthier, more understanding concept of their own secuality later on when they've superceded their screwing quota hehe!

ahh ok i see lady_m.

Im usually vague...but hopefully its clear.

You should be in control at all times...that would make you be considered liberated and not necessarily a slut.

Although MD is right its about who is judging as well.

control of your emotions and body.

"when they've superceded their screwing quota hehe!"

hahaha 😛



ok now if the original topic didn't sound weird, i'm SURE this is going to...and there will be people who just think it is ridiculous...but i'm gonna write it anyway. the whole screwing quota thing made me think of it.

it seems like once a woman acts like a slut, she's kind of permanently "tainted". at least to me...i mean i can see it in my post about christina. she will probably always be a slut in my mind, no matter how much she "cleans up". and then of course there's the good ol' double standard, where a guy can easily clean up and stop sowing his wild oats and he's good to go; it really was "just a phase". i wonder why i think that way...cause i don't want to, obviously.

my philosophy teacher is like a male feminist...he believes 100% that as women have gained more equality in many areas of life in america (politics, economically, etc.) that they have lost sexual power. and then he rambles on about the derogatory terms like nail, screw, bang that are used to describe having sex with a woman. now i really don't think women have become sexually oppressed to the extent he takes it...cause women who sleep around have ALWAYS been looked down on. i definitely think there is a double standard though, because even i have it (can't lie). although i do classify men who sleep around excessively as whores too...

Interesting post Wheelies...

I am a bit older and the way I think is.....

I really do NOT care what other people think of me. It is none of my business and it truly is none of theirs...but, if they want to make it so....fine. It will not effect me.

I have learned to do what makes me happy -

Maybe it is an age thing?

*everything has a label if you choose to see it. 😉

"Although MD is right its about who is judging as well."

yeah i know. my friends are all like, "nope no middle ground you have sex outside a relationship, you're a slut." and that just seems really close-minded to me...i dunno. of course i always am gonna let people do their own thing, because i don't look down on people. but there has to be some sort of standard to be set, because i do think the world i live in revolves way too much around sex and too many hearts are broken because of unfaithfulness. i think the cheating definition is a good one.

People can and do shed the slut label with time..and rehab...

"But now,even sleeping around in the slightest,labels a woman as damaged goods,as and when a man feels fit...........so you really can't win.....oh well,hey ho....."

yeah that's what i meant by the double standard

as for manginas (a term i loathe 🙂), something can be said for them. there's nothing wrong with supporting feminism, if that's how they feel. kinda like during the civil rights movement when white people participated in boycotts...just fighting for a cause that you're not necessarily on the losing side of, but ultimately your voice will count for a helluva lot

for example...

Can Elizabeth taylor be branded a slut...? She married many of them....she got the jewelry...fame...money...etc.

What about Jeniffer Lopez...same scenario...different day and age....no one labels her a slut any longer with her new and seems to be final/last guy....

Everyone has that aunt,cousin, someone in the family who has a past....but now it seems to be just a past...

which is understandable antibling. i was referring to men who actually care about women's equality though...or are you saying they don't exist?

i see your point lady_m. where i live there is still the concept of a woman being "tainted" if she's had sex with a lot of people...it's like she's lost this evasive sense of "purity". it can't really be explained, and it is definitely stupid, but i'm still guilty of it sometimes.

I too judge...but to a certain extent.

I mainly label girls girls sluts when there being used...I hate to see a woman/girl being used. My definition of slut means they arent receiving anything or as much as they are putting out.

who knows. things that seem truly inconceivable now could be fully realized in a few decades. it happens.

"A lot of women don't want equality,they want equality with preference as and when it suits their mood/situation......"

ok...

"I mainly label girls girls sluts when there being used...I hate to see a woman/girl being used. My definition of slut means they arent receiving anything or as much as they are putting out."

mmhmm. it annoys me too. but how much can you really blame them, when so much worth is put on womens' desirability.

"She's a Cum dumpster"

umm...wow...

You can be desirable with out being physical.
Its better when you arent physical...people always want what they cant have.

tsk tsk

it was directed at you bling 😛

ooohh...good point m

"That's why women should work in technology."

hehehhe

Your being tainted by your unrequited love for wheels bling...

well then you haven't antibling. glad that's settled.

"Your being tainted by your unrequited love for wheels bling..."

not another one of THOSE. *le sigh* 😛

😛

antibling, i don't think anyone on dxp has the capability of provoking the same violent emotions in me as you do. after reading your little tea and sympathy plea, i got the urge to pour scalding tea down your throat and hand you a tampon you could use to plug up your own asshole/piehole. is that enough sympathy for you?

you should consider giving lessons.

my irritation has nothing to do with you being right, cause you're definitely not in my opinion. it has more to do with you thinking you're right. but that's nothing new. 😛

as for the unrequited love thing, if it makes you feel any better, as i've said before, i do love you. like a dxp brother.

except i don't have it wrong...*hums merrily*

aren't those men labelled as players who have had a lot of sexual shenanigans😛

i didn't really lose anything though. cause i know you're gonna do the same thing some other time. oh, and because i'm not wrong. 😉

but if it makes you feel any better, i still respect and value your (terribly wrong) opinion, and yours will have just as much influence as my philosophy professor. don't you worry. (like when i'm thinking about the possible ignorant comments people may make despite having never been in the situation, and therefore being completely incapable of sympathy). no no, i'm just kidding. i know where you're coming from. hehe

nice pic dtn.

yes they are. and all i was trying to say earlier was that men typically have an easier time ridding themselves of the playa reputation than women do of the slut one.

"WH....you haven't got a clue,and because you're just a little kid,I think your sweeping statement is cute........."

antibling, you haven't got a clue, and because age is typically associated with wisdom, i think your sweeping statement is very disappointing.

right now, i don't see things your way. but if it were to come to that, i would definitely admit it. so stop generalizing. i really don't see any reason you have to say i'm NOT humble enough to do anything, as i typically admit defeat openly. hoebag.

there is fairness on both the sides i feel.let people explore themselves if that is what they wish.why put label?

wheelhomies,thankyou dear😛

maybe women do make excuses, but that doesn't change that they are often times more valued (in society) for their appearance/level of sexual desirability more than any other facet of their being.

wheelie,the 'good girl syndrom'?

i agree dtn. it's not really like that though...

actually, antibling, i said you irritated me more than any other poster....

yes it does, when you say i said i wasn't irritated...gosh!

did i say that it all sunshine for attractive females? NO. in fact, i said that part of the reason they may give themselves sexually to a man who doesn't care about them is that they EQUATE sexual desirability with self worth, and if they aren't having sex, they feel unworthy of appreciation. now i know you may not agree with this, but it happens and i have seen it...

and yes, of course i know that individuals have control over their actions. but the way they interpret the messages they get from the media and society will have some control over them too...

"wheelie,the 'good girl syndrom'?"

i don't know what you mean