cancer male confusion...

Ok, so I am a gemini 24 yrs old and I have just come out of a 5 year relationship wiv my cancer 21 yrs old, we we're drifting apart an he just wanted to go partying with his boys! So I asked for a break, thinking he would miss me!
Big mistake, he decided he liked the break and didn't want to get back, its been 4 months an I miss him like mad, but he's so confusing.
First he said he didn't know if he still loved me, didn't want to say no incase he does bt he isn't sure. Then says he is over me, doesn't love me no more, doesn't miss me etc.
After 5 yrs I don't get how he cud write it off so quick! Then he tells me I'm his best friend an he wants to stay friends, I'm finding this hard as I am asking him stupid questions I don't really wanna know answer to like has he kissed anyone since.
He replied yes, but some random girl in a club while he was drunk. 😢 anyways then he goes cold, doesn't want me contacting him. Telling me to leave him alone, because when I ask him to get back or mention us as a couple from before he feels uncomfortable
And is over it. Then we decided not to b friends as it hurt me to much, we had a heartwarming goodbye and he wiped my makeup from my eyes where I'd been crying, gave me a hug etc.
Then 2 days later msgs me on facebook saying "hey biatch, when u gunna show me ur new tattoo?", he told me his mums tryna marry him off to a greek girl (he's greek)
Iv only been gone 4 months :O! Bt then I'm nt greek. Then tells me our mutual friend tried to get him with another mutual friend (nice friends) bt he's nt happy with any of this.
Then other day I rang him and he says he's driving he will ring me back after. Doesn't ring me back, then I call him again, he says he cnt talk he's working at his dads shop.
Then I sent him a txt saying I cnt handle this on an offness and he's never got time for me, he wanted me as a friend an then doesn't bother but bothers with the boys. I mentioned also how his friends have let him down an he knows I never have
And he rings me straight back having a laugh with me and says I'm silly for sending the text.
He goes out with his friends every wkend and his friends stay over a lot. So he has distractions an hasn't really had the chance to miss me.
I however am grieving 😢 missing him loads. He wasn't just in my life for 5 yrs he was my life.
Is he over me? Or is he just living his life and having distractions? Why is he so hot n cold?
I met him when he was 16 so he's not really had that young part

....Partying stage with his boys? Maybe he needs that freedom? I don't know 😢


Help?

His birthdays the 6th july 1988

sorry there, girly. he's 21! this is very typical. i'm always shocked when guys actually stay with the same girl that long, but, i rarely hear about it either.
it probably didn't take him long to ''get over it'' because he probably started pulling away (emotionally) a long time ago. plus, he's a young cancer male!
my 1st love/bf was a cancer. i was 16 & him 18. it lasted for 3 years and i don't know how it happened. he was a terribly immature guy and cancers have difficulty letting go even when it's obvious they're better off single. i had to end things with mine or he would have stayed put. it went on for 2.5 years longer than it should have. he cheated and lied the whole time yet proposed to me twice! go figure! so don't feel bad. mid-20's is a pivotal, transformational stage for females anyway. this time is YOUR time to figure yourself out!

Breakups are hard, hug for Ser—
You shouldn't do things just to keep him though.
If he says you are not a couple don't do things
that couples do and end up becoming his "friend" with benefits.
(Unless you seriously don't mind but some women do it and
are unhappy about it)

I like Ninjamu's advice for you to focus on yourself.

It might feel like he is your life but there's more for you.

He could be okay with this break up because you still have feelings
for him and he knows he can come back to you if he feels like it. I think
you should step out of his back pocket you don't need to play games but
you can pay all your attention to yourself instead of him and maybe if he's
not so sure of what he is to you he might act different.

I doubt you won't come back in his mind at some point.
My Cancer was dumped at 16 by his first GF and even though he's not in contact with her
(her choice I'm sure) and even though it's been 50 million years since it happened and he was
only a teen he still seems to be in love or something.
I don't even think of people from high school let alone love them lol

Good luck Ser

Thanks guys! I know were not right for eachother anymore its just hard because I'm missing him and we have mutual friends etc.
He's never cheated on me that I know..he never had chance too he was always with me lol.
And don't get me wrong I have thought of going down that route which I know I would've regretted and wudve hurt more, but when I said that to him (friends with benefits)
He said "no ser, ur not a sl*g so don't act like it"..he's sweet really but def immature!
Its just hard to find myself cos I feel lonley and then I start to think of him or memories.
*hugs* thank u both!

Xxx