Crab guy hiding truth

So I've tried to post earlier here, don't really know what happened but here it goes.

There was this crab guy I started speaking to via a dating site one year ago. Didn't take it seriously then, was not in the right place for dating but we started speaking again this spring and he seemed so charming, gentle and trustworthy that I kinda started liking him before we met. He also seemed to have patience with the changes happening in my life and thought he must be understanding as well. So we agreed to finally meet after about two months of basically him doing the chasing via WhatsApp.. He cancelled the first time, telling a friend of his had a disk hernia and needed him. I said OK and we met later that week, after he got back from work travel. The date was fantastic, he was even better in reality and we clicked immediately. He said he was single when we started chatting in the spring, and I even asked how come a man like him is not in a relationship when we met. Well, I do not remember the answer because I was swept off my feet by that cute charming protective guy. After this, we kept speaking and he was telling stuff like he missed me. Then he turned colder and I thought it's due to the star sign, but long story short, he cancelled the next date and told me the next day he goes on holiday (I knew he will do it, but not all of the sudden). I just took my distance when noticing this strange behaviour and didn't reply to his 'I miss you' text he sent three days later. He then dropped another message calling me honey, to which I replied the next day. Oh well, I thought all this time I might be a bit harsh on the poor crab sensitive guy, but yesterday after telling really cute stuff like he likes me and had a really good feeling with me, he drops the bomb telling he's not "100% free" and to "be patient" and "give him time". He still wanna meet and "getting to know me better and share more time together", but I am like wtf is happening here... Should I try to listen to his story or this is just some player trying to get some more?

You said he grew colder....

How?

In what way?

Posted by TaurusBull1977

You said he grew colder....

How?

In what way?

Well he stopped replying to my texts as fast as he used to (now that this bomb dropped he's back at the regular speed lol), when he did reply the messages were short and dry, he also stopped sending kisses or telling he misses me and the cute stuff like that. I tried to don't make a big deal out of it, but he cancelled the date we were supposed to have and next day he let me know he leaves for holidays the same evening...

Posted by Marai

Not 100% free? Something 🐠 is going on.

If you feel he is worth it to hear him out, why not.

You can always decide later to not pursue it.

Thank you for your reply!

I really really liked him, it is just weird that he first said he's not seeing anybody and now that it was obvious I am into him, he tells this and asks for my patience. I am scared as I know this is what married players tell to be able to play some more so I am really confused and didn't even reply to his last messages 😞

Posted by Marai

Posted by Libra_gal

Posted by Marai

Not 100% free? Something 🐠 is going on.

If you feel he is worth it to hear him out, why not.

You can always decide later to not pursue it.

Thank you for your reply!

I really really liked him, it is just weird that he first said he's not seeing anybody and now that it was obvious I am into him, he tells this and asks for my patience. I am scared as I know this is what married players tell to be able to play some more so I am really confused and didn't even reply to his last messages 😞

He said you should give him time, so you know something is going on. The behaviour he has sounds like he's married. Would keep a distance until you have some answers.

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Yep, I feel the same. It's just difficult to accept that a guy who seemed to be a great one could do this. Especially a crab guy who has a vibe of vulnerability as well 🤦

Posted by Caliope

He told you he wasn't 100% free.

He has a girlfriend or a wife.

You guessed right, he's a player.

Thank you for the input, I needed some confirmation as my friends tell me to listen him out, but they've never heard all the bad stories which start just like this.

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Caliope

He told you he wasn't 100% free.

He has a girlfriend or a wife.

You guessed right, he's a player.

Exactly... not really neuro science

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Just difficult to accept the guy with soft eyes and an air of vulnerability is a predator. I guess I got thrown into a bit of a cognitive dissonance. Thanks for the help 🤞

No.

I don't care what he says, he said he isn't free. No one should start something, if they aren't finished with someone else.

He can kick rocks.

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Libra_gal

Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Caliope

He told you he wasn't 100% free.

He has a girlfriend or a wife.

You guessed right, he's a player.

Exactly... not really neuro science

Just difficult to accept the guy with soft eyes and an air of vulnerability is a predator. I guess I got thrown into a bit of a cognitive dissonance. Thanks for the help 🤞

They're cute predators

They Just don't really notice their actions or care

Id say emotionally selfish than predator

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Yeah he seems emotionally selfish, not caring how it would hurt the woman already involved with him. I thought crabs are lovely sensitive creatures and i was careful not to hurt or scare him smh

Posted by nikkistar

No.

I don't care what he says, he said he isn't free. No one should start something, if they aren't finished with someone else.

He can kick rocks.

I agree. Unfortunately I wished he said that before I started liking him but oh well, at least it was not too late.