what to do with a cancer woman when you do something she doesn't like?

this is a continuation of my initial post about what to do with a cancer woman... i noticed that if i do something (even unintentional and even if it is small) that my cancer doesn’t like, she will turn against me 360 degrees like i never did anything good. what should i do when she is like that? thanks! here's what happened:
1. we were in a marathon practice. she said "go ahead" i thought what she meant was run fast... so i ran fast and left her behind... and then after that i realized i just wanted to be by her side, so i waited for her to catch up... she said "...you will get board with us" and then she suddenly started talking (passive aggressively) about being boastful... and then i got tired and confused with what she said so i walked until i finish while she ran past me.. i think that she didn't liked it because i embarrass her for doing what i did? (running fast and then walking afterwards)

i notice that we always have this communication gap... but when i try to talk to her recently (to clarify what happened) she doesn't talk to me back.

what's worse is she learned to lie. but thing is, when she uses lies to get what she wants from me, my tendency as a scorpio is to not follow it (because i am aware that she is lying).. i'm aware that she is using the lie to get what she wants me to do, but the mere fact that it's a lie is making me not do it (instinctively as a scorpio)

when we were at the marathon practice she said that someone will catch me afterwards (i think that what she wanted me to do was not do the run) but i learned after that that was not true --- there was no one who caught me for anything.

for me as a scorpio it is hard to follow a lie. what i do is i uncover the truth and then follow what the truth really is...

I'm not sure why you want to be with someone who, based on how you've portrayed her, is manipulative, spiteful, a liar, and immature acting.

maybe realized she wasn't up for the challenge and wanted go home but there was a way to do so without being rude.

My Scorpio brother and his double Scorpio friend always want me to go kayaking but I won't go because I know they will make comments if I don't like it somehow in the midst of my novice knowledge about how it really is. Later on they will be more sympathatic but sometimes i just want to be at an event where I was complete access to leave without anyone questioning me later on or reading into it.

Some Cancers will get pissed and get mad because they felt like you were in a situation where they were uncomfortable and u basically were trying to tell them to toughen up and they didn't want to hear it at that time.

Thats why I wont be in any wedding party, I want to be able to leave at anytime if I have anxiety or something feels off. I have been at many events where people rubbed me the wrong way while everyone else likes them and i just would rather be out of the situation than justify my feelings any further.

We go with our gut intuition and Scorpio is probably offended because we are lying and they pick up on the lying part more than what we really want to convey.


Do you really want a Cancer to tell you how they got to the point they did.

-I ate a huge lunch earlier and I feel completely bloated. I literally am tired now and I am suppose to now start this major event.

-Oh shit, I am spotting, I don't want him to see this in the back of my shorts, im running this huge race and I dont have a pad or anything and imma sweat down there.

-I am kinda horny, id rather act weird then him see me in a position that might turn him off if he saw it.

-I see someone at this race I was obessessed with at one time, I sent them a facebook message years back showing my feelings to them and they never responded and they are going to see me for sure if I go any further. I am not sure if they thought it was sweet or I am a stalker in their mind now

and yoou think we just act this way to piss people off lol

Posted by HighTide
maybe realized she wasn't up for the challenge and wanted go home but there was a way to do so without being rude.

My Scorpio brother and his double Scorpio friend always want me to go kayaking but I won't go because I know they will make comments if I don't like it somehow in the midst of my novice knowledge about how it really is. Later on they will be more sympathatic but sometimes i just want to be at an event where I was complete access to leave without anyone questioning me later on or reading into it.

Some Cancers will get pissed and get mad because they felt like you were in a situation where they were uncomfortable and u basically were trying to tell them to toughen up and they didn't want to hear it at that time.

Thats why I wont be in any wedding party, I want to be able to leave at anytime if I have anxiety or something feels off. I have been at many events where people rubbed me the wrong way while everyone else likes them and i just would rather be out of the situation than justify my feelings any further.

but what should i do when you guys are like that? she doesn't want to talk to me right now... and there are a lot of misunderstandings...

and what do i do when she becomes passive aggressive?

show the Scorpio genuineness without the stinger out then make a funny Scorpio comment to show we were being a little too dramatic.

You know how to address the elephant in the room better than anyone in a humerous way.

on a side note I will always be fascinated by the funny way Scorpios get to the bottom of things.

when i say something (even unintentional) that she doesn't like, she turns 360 degrees against me.
when i do something (even unintentional) that she doesn't like, she turns 360 degrees against me.
when i don't do something (even unintentional) that she wants me to do, she turns 360 degrees against me.

that pretty much sums it up. what do i do when she is like that?

Posted by HighTide
show the Scorpio genuineness without the stinger out then make a funny Scorpio comment to show we were being a little too dramatic.

You know how to address the elephant in the room better than anyone in a humerous way.

on a side note I will always be fascinated by the funny way Scorpios get to the bottom of things.

thanks. also i am not sharing with her about a lot of things that is going on with me right now when i learned that she lies... so she doesn't know much about me yet... she is jumping to conclusions without knowing about me yet...

and the more she jumps to conclusions, the more i don't want to share with her... (another problem)

well a total chart might be needed to see what the moon and sun is for both person. Just because sun signs are considered compatible you always gotta look at the Venus and Moon to get a bigger idea of whats going on. I am always a stickler about that to get a more accurate answers. Thats why going off Sun signs alone is bad, you start from there and work your way down the chart to fill in inconsistancy.

I have met Cancers nothing like me, my moon is in Pisces and there are some Cancer who are on my same wavelength and some that are filled up totally with air or earth in their chart.

Im sure you will get to the bottom of it if it matters enough to you.

Posted by MoonArtist
I'm not sure why you want to be with someone who, based on how you've portrayed her, is manipulative, spiteful, a liar, and immature acting.

sorry... it's scorpio love...

She sounds like she is insecure. If you guys can't communicate then you will end up hurting each other. Are you sure she is lying? What does she want? Do you know? What do you want? Is the relationship worth it? If you can't communicate it won't work.

Posted by Silver7nz
She sounds like she is insecure. If you guys can't communicate then you will end up hurting each other. Are you sure she is lying? What does she want? Do you know? What do you want? Is the relationship worth it? If you can't communicate it won't work.

i try to reach out to her but not in a serious way... i can come up with light jokes (true jokes) that i think is funny. and when it comes to jokes we are in the same wavelength (i'm the only one that understands her jokes) so i think the things that i would find funny she will find it funny too... (fingers crossed)
like right now someone says the other day that she is mad at me...

i just said right now to the effect of: ...if it's true that she's mad at me, then it means that i'm more kind than her..because i've never been mad at her.. if it were a contest (who's the kindest), i win. 🙂

hopefully it gets to her

Posted by scorpio04
this is a continuation of my initial post about what to do with a cancer woman... i noticed that if i do something (even unintentional and even if it is small) that my cancer doesn’t like, she will turn against me 360 degrees like i never did anything good. what should i do when she is like that? thanks! here's what happened:
1. we were in a marathon practice. she said "go ahead" i thought what she meant was run fast... so i ran fast and left her behind... and then after that i realized i just wanted to be by her side, so i waited for her to catch up... she said "...you will get board with us" and then she suddenly started talking (passive aggressively) about being boastful... and then i got tired and confused with what she said so i walked until i finish while she ran past me.. i think that she didn't liked it because i embarrass her for doing what i did? (running fast and then walking afterwards)

i notice that we always have this communication gap... but when i try to talk to her recently (to clarify what happened) she doesn't talk to me back.

what's worse is she learned to lie. but thing is, when she uses lies to get what she wants from me, my tendency as a scorpio is to not follow it (because i am aware that she is lying).. i'm aware that she is using the lie to get what she wants me to do, but the mere fact that it's a lie is making me not do it (instinctively as a scorpio)

when we were at the marathon practice she said that someone will catch me afterwards (i think that what she wanted me to do was not do the run) but i learned after that that was not true --- there was no one who caught me for anything.

for me as a scorpio it is hard to follow a lie. what i do is i uncover the truth and then follow what the truth really is...

How old are you, and how old is she?

and i said before something like: we're like in a tv drama (when she is mad at me), i wonder where's the hidden camera? 🙂

Posted by AnOdeToNoOne

Posted by scorpio04
this is a continuation of my initial post about what to do with a cancer woman... i noticed that if i do something (even unintentional and even if it is small) that my cancer doesn’t like, she will turn against me 360 degrees like i never did anything good. what should i do when she is like that? thanks! here's what happened:
1. we were in a marathon practice. she said "go ahead" i thought what she meant was run fast... so i ran fast and left her behind... and then after that i realized i just wanted to be by her side, so i waited for her to catch up... she said "...you will get board with us" and then she suddenly started talking (passive aggressively) about being boastful... and then i got tired and confused with what she said so i walked until i finish while she ran past me.. i think that she didn't liked it because i embarrass her for doing what i did? (running fast and then walking afterwards)

i notice that we always have this communication gap... but when i try to talk to her recently (to clarify what happened) she doesn't talk to me back.

what's worse is she learned to lie. but thing is, when she uses lies to get what she wants from me, my tendency as a scorpio is to not follow it (because i am aware that she is lying).. i'm aware that she is using the lie to get what she wants me to do, but the mere fact that it's a lie is making me not do it (instinctively as a scorpio)

when we were at the marathon practice she said that someone will catch me afterwards (i think that what she wanted me to do was not do the run) but i learned after that that was not true --- there was no one who caught me for anything.

for me as a scorpio it is hard to follow a lie. what i do is i uncover the truth and then follow what the truth really is...

How old are you, and how old is she?

click to expand

i'm 28 she's 44.

when i say something good/she likes...i get scared to say/do something else because she'll do a 360 degrees on me... and turn sour on me again... but i feel that i can't avoid hurting her... every little thing i do i hurt her... but for some reason i want to "obey" to her every wish so that i won't hurt her... because i don't want her feeling hurt

i want to "cure" her of that, if that is possible...

when i make mistakes (even unintentional ones) she makes it into a big deal... sometimes i'm already getting used to it but as a scorpio i want to know what is going on with her...

Posted by scorpio04

Posted by MoonArtist
I'm not sure why you want to be with someone who, based on how you've portrayed her, is manipulative, spiteful, a liar, and immature acting.

sorry... it's scorpio love...

click to expand

I totally get the connection, but at some point you have to decide if you want to put up with and stay with something that's not healthy for you or not, and that goes for anyone who finds themselves in a similar situation. Most try to stick it out because of "duty" or "loyalty" and even love, but if you have enough warning signs that something isn't good for you and that person refuses to work with you with the goal of improving the relationship then at some point you no longer have the right to complain because you're an active participant when you choose to stay.

This (your situation) is mild compared to the abuse some people have decided to put up with, but the premise is the same. I'm curious, though, would you like her if you didn't know her and she was dating a friend of yours or would you be put off by the lying, manipulating, etc. and advise your friend to run?

Posted by scorpio04
when i say something good/she likes...i get scared to say/do something else because she'll do a 360 degrees on me... and turn sour on me again... but i feel that i can't avoid hurting her... every little thing i do i hurt her... but for some reason i want to "obey" to her every wish so that i won't hurt her... because i don't want her feeling hurt

I'm so sorry, but I seriously hurt for you. She's 44 and she's acting this way? And you're 28! You're such a "baby"! I don't mean that in the literal insulting way, just that I'm 42 so where I stand you still have a ton of life experience to experience. I'm getting the sense that she's taking advantage of you. When I was your age I was married (no big age diff), but was also in that young and naive mindset of ignoring the warning signs and bad character traits with the optimistic ideal that we could work things out, that maybe I needed to change who I was to make the relationship work. Things deteriorated to the point where the abuse was getting worse and worse and it was only a matter of time before he crossed the line and became physically abusive. I had to live through that to learn my lesson about relationships and setting boundaries for myself in regards to what I'll tolerate with other people. I hate seeing others having to learn the same lesson the harder more painful way that I did, and if I could get others to learn that lesson via by my example I'd be glad.

Look her dead in the eyes and say,truthfully only,"I'm sorry if I have upset you.Im not sure what I did but I would like to fix it."

Why are you putting up with this childish behavior?

Posted by MoonArtist

Posted by scorpio04

Posted by MoonArtist
I'm not sure why you want to be with someone who, based on how you've portrayed her, is manipulative, spiteful, a liar, and immature acting.

sorry... it's scorpio love...

I totally get the connection, but at some point you have to decide if you want to put up with and stay with something that's not healthy for you or not, and that goes for anyone who finds themselves in a similar situation. Most try to stick it out because of "duty" or "loyalty" and even love, but if you have enough warning signs that something isn't good for you and that person refuses to work with you with the goal of improving the relationship then at some point you no longer have the right to complain because you're an active participant when you choose to stay.

This (your situation) is mild compared to the abuse some people have decided to put up with, but the premise is the same. I'm curious, though, would you like her if you didn't know her and she was dating a friend of yours or would you be put off by the lying, manipulating, etc. and advise your friend to run?

click to expand

what i love about her the most is that she loves me too. i see it in her eyes whenever we look at each others eyes (we do that often) i'm willing to work things out with her... and i don't think there's anybody out there who can ever love her more than me... and i think she knows that... i feel so connected with her i can't just let her go...

Posted by scorpio04

Posted by MoonArtist

Posted by scorpio04

Posted by MoonArtist
I'm not sure why you want to be with someone who, based on how you've portrayed her, is manipulative, spiteful, a liar, and immature acting.

sorry... it's scorpio love...

I totally get the connection, but at some point you have to decide if you want to put up with and stay with something that's not healthy for you or not, and that goes for anyone who finds themselves in a similar situation. Most try to stick it out because of "duty" or "loyalty" and even love, but if you have enough warning signs that something isn't good for you and that person refuses to work with you with the goal of improving the relationship then at some point you no longer have the right to complain because you're an active participant when you choose to stay.

This (your situation) is mild compared to the abuse some people have decided to put up with, but the premise is the same. I'm curious, though, would you like her if you didn't know her and she was dating a friend of yours or would you be put off by the lying, manipulating, etc. and advise your friend to run?

what i love about her the most is that she loves me too. i see it in her eyes whenever we look at each others eyes (we do that often) i'm willing to work things out with her... and i don't think there's anybody out there who can ever love her more than me... and i think she knows that... i feel so connected with her i can't just let her go...

click to expand

That's a selfish reason to love someone, and it isn't real love, imo. My ex said that about me, once, when I asked him what he loved about me. He couldn't come up with anything other than "I liked that you loved me and it made me feel good". Obviously he didn't actually love ME, just how I made him feel, and it showed in his actions. We're divorced.

Posted by MoonArtist

Posted by scorpio04

Posted by MoonArtist

Posted by scorpio04

Posted by MoonArtist
I'm not sure why you want to be with someone who, based on how you've portrayed her, is manipulative, spiteful, a liar, and immature acting.

sorry... it's scorpio love...

I totally get the connection, but at some point you have to decide if you want to put up with and stay with something that's not healthy for you or not, and that goes for anyone who finds themselves in a similar situation. Most try to stick it out because of "duty" or "loyalty" and even love, but if you have enough warning signs that something isn't good for you and that person refuses to work with you with the goal of improving the relationship then at some point you no longer have the right to complain because you're an active participant when you choose to stay.

This (your situation) is mild compared to the abuse some people have decided to put up with, but the premise is the same. I'm curious, though, would you like her if you didn't know her and she was dating a friend of yours or would you be put off by the lying, manipulating, etc. and advise your friend to run?

what i love about her the most is that she loves me too. i see it in her eyes whenever we look at each others eyes (we do that often) i'm willing to work things out with her... and i don't think there's anybody out there who can ever love her more than me... and i think she knows that... i feel so connected with her i can't just let her go...

That's a selfish reason to love someone, and it isn't real love, imo. My ex said that about me, once, when I asked him what he loved about me. He couldn't come up with anything other than "I liked that you loved me and it made me feel good". Obviously he didn't actually love ME, just how I made him feel, and it showed in his actions. We're divorced.

click to expand

i understand what you're saying... is he a scorpio too? for me as a scorpio, i want to give the same exact love that she is giving to me back to her 10x. i've never been mad at her not even once... even if i hate liars and even when she's mad at me a lot of times.. i always forgive her... i just try to understand her and her mood swings... and try to figure out what is making her mad... i'm the only one that says 'sorry' she's too prideful to admit to anything she just plays dumb if she's at fault (e.g. when the problem we had was because she lied.)

it's just sometimes i don't know what she wants me to do because i'm consistent in what i do and say but i get different reactions from her... sometimes she likes it...sometimes she doesn't/gets angry... is it a timing issue or something? sometimes even when i do something good and she likes it (so she's in a good loving mood), and then i do something unintentionally that she doesn't like and then i put her in a bad mood... i feel the responsibility that i have with her mood (i noticed that i can change her mood depending on what i do and say) i just want her to be in a good mood always.

No, he's a Taurus, and the love was very one sided all me giving to him while he just said and did the right things to appear that he loved me. As a water sign I totally get wanting to reciprocate, but how do you know she loves you? She doesn't seem to be treating you like she loves you.

Posted by MoonArtist
No, he's a Taurus, and the love was very one sided all me giving to him while he just said and did the right things to appear that he loved me. As a water sign I totally get wanting to reciprocate, but how do you know she loves you? She doesn't seem to be treating you like she loves you.

actually at first i didn't knew that she likes me... i just liked her and then i was expecting that it would be just one sided... but i noticed at first that when i talk about another girl when she is there, she gets passive aggressive all of the sudden... and then she actually made a move on me --- she touches me and hugs me and got very very close to me... sometimes she wants to kiss me or she wants me to kiss her but during those times i didn't knew that she likes me, so i wasn't able to kiss her when she wanted me to... she told me "i love you dearly" and "love you" before, but again i wasn't able to say it back when she said it because i wasn't sure if she really liked me.. but later on i was able to tell her that i love her when she hugged me, i whispered it to her... now she gets hurt by me when i do small even unintentional things that she doesn't like (she wasn't like this before) and everything written about that scorpio-cancer connection? that's all true for us... even the telepathy... she uses our telepathy to "call me" to be near her... the funny thing is she is the only one who is using it/who can use it at will... i'm not using it... i just look into her eyes.. because she learned to lie, i trust more what i see and feel when i look into her eyes... since she learned to lie and i caught her lying multiple times, i'm not really sure what to believe in the things she says... but when i look into her eyes, i'm sure...

here's another issue... before she was making up excuses to see me... and then there are a couple of times that i refused to go... she ask somebody else to ask me to go and i knew that she will be there, but i said 'no' because i didn't liked the other people there... i think she took my "no" personally and she's taking "revenge" for that by making it so hard for me to see her while she shows that she sees other people easily...

that's another way that i noticed that she manifests her passive aggressiveness on me when i say/do something she doesn't like: she makes it so hard for me to see her or refuse to be with me while talking to somebody else openly to see them/be with them... the funny thing is though, the next time we see each other after she does that, we're okay as if nothing happened... it's kind of confusing from a scorpio point of view... is that normal for cancer women?

Posted by scorpio04

Posted by AnOdeToNoOne

Posted by scorpio04
this is a continuation of my initial post about what to do with a cancer woman... i noticed that if i do something (even unintentional and even if it is small) that my cancer doesn’t like, she will turn against me 360 degrees like i never did anything good. what should i do when she is like that? thanks! here's what happened:
1. we were in a marathon practice. she said "go ahead" i thought what she meant was run fast... so i ran fast and left her behind... and then after that i realized i just wanted to be by her side, so i waited for her to catch up... she said "...you will get board with us" and then she suddenly started talking (passive aggressively) about being boastful... and then i got tired and confused with what she said so i walked until i finish while she ran past me.. i think that she didn't liked it because i embarrass her for doing what i did? (running fast and then walking afterwards)

i notice that we always have this communication gap... but when i try to talk to her recently (to clarify what happened) she doesn't talk to me back.

what's worse is she learned to lie. but thing is, when she uses lies to get what she wants from me, my tendency as a scorpio is to not follow it (because i am aware that she is lying).. i'm aware that she is using the lie to get what she wants me to do, but the mere fact that it's a lie is making me not do it (instinctively as a scorpio)

when we were at the marathon practice she said that someone will catch me afterwards (i think that what she wanted me to do was not do the run) but i learned after that that was not true --- there was no one who caught me for anything.

for me as a scorpio it is hard to follow a lie. what i do is i uncover the truth and then follow what the truth really is...

How old are you, and how old is she?

i'm 28 she's 44.

Posted by scorpio04
........................ she said "...you will get board with us" .......................

click to expand

.

It sounds like she is insecure about the age gap.
And you may be as well because you are thinking way to hard on what she meant and the effect your actions had on her.
Dude it's just a run.
You are trying to hard to understand what she wants and what she means.
Ask her what she wants and what she means.

Cancer/Scorpio have communication problems as it is, then add this age factor.
You have no choice but to be very direct and straightforward with her.

Cancer/Scorpio have communication problems as it is, then add this age factor.
You have no choice but to be very direct and straightforward with her.

yeah... our communication problem started out like this:
1. i didn't knew that i was supposed to be the one to initiate the conversation... i was waiting for her to initiate it.. so i thought that there were no problems because she was not opening up about it...
2. the more problems we're getting (because of a lack of communication) the more i think we need to talk about it, but the more she stops talking to me (because of the problems) and i don't know what to do yet to make her start talking to me again...

but then again there are these times before when she was mad at me but the next time we saw each other we were okay like nothing happened before...

Posted by scorpio04
that's another way that i noticed that she manifests her passive aggressiveness on me when i say/do something she doesn't like: she makes it so hard for me to see her or refuse to be with me while talking to somebody else openly to see them/be with them... the funny thing is though, the next time we see each other after she does that, we're okay as if nothing happened... it's kind of confusing from a scorpio point of view... is that normal for cancer women?

No that's not normal cancer behavior or even normal people behavior. Yes, I'm sure the connection is strong because scorpio/cancer, but that doesn't mean she actually loves you or even that she has your best interests in mind. So far she sounds very immature, spoiled, manipulative and a liar. Why not find a person with a better character who can also share that kind of connection with you?

Posted by MoonArtist

Posted by scorpio04
that's another way that i noticed that she manifests her passive aggressiveness on me when i say/do something she doesn't like: she makes it so hard for me to see her or refuse to be with me while talking to somebody else openly to see them/be with them... the funny thing is though, the next time we see each other after she does that, we're okay as if nothing happened... it's kind of confusing from a scorpio point of view... is that normal for cancer women?

No that's not normal cancer behavior or even normal people behavior. Yes, I'm sure the connection is strong because scorpio/cancer, but that doesn't mean she actually loves you or even that she has your best interests in mind. So far she sounds very immature, spoiled, manipulative and a liar. Why not find a person with a better character who can also share that kind of connection with you?

click to expand

i've met a cancer before, but i've never felt what i have felt with her in my entire life... i humbly think she's my twin flame

what i meant was i have met a cancer before... and i think that cancer before liked me, but i've never felt the same feeling that i feel with my cancer right now... i've never felt anything like what i have felt with my cancer right now.... i humbly think she's my twin flame

It's possible she is, but if so, she's a seriously fucked up twin flame.

Posted by MoonArtist
It's possible she is, but if so, she's a seriously fucked up twin flame.

maybe it's my divine job to get her shit straight. thanks for all you guy's comments. please pray for us!

Posted by scorpio04

Posted by MoonArtist
It's possible she is, but if so, she's a seriously fucked up twin flame.

maybe it's my divine job to get her shit straight. thanks for all you guy's comments. please pray for us!

click to expand

No, it's not. It's never anyone elses job to get another to have their act together. It's always each individual's job to do that themselves. NO ONE can do that for another. You can show her an example, you can encourage, but it's still HER choice. You'll have more of an impact, if she actually cares, by taking a strong stance and setting boundaries of what is acceptable and what isn't than if you pander to her toddler like behavior.

Posted by MoonArtist

Posted by scorpio04

Posted by MoonArtist
It's possible she is, but if so, she's a seriously fucked up twin flame.

maybe it's my divine job to get her shit straight. thanks for all you guy's comments. please pray for us!

No, it's not. It's never anyone elses job to get another to have their act together. It's always each individual's job to do that themselves. NO ONE can do that for another. You can show her an example, you can encourage, but it's still HER choice. You'll have more of an impact, if she actually cares, by taking a strong stance and setting boundaries of what is acceptable and what isn't than if you pander to her toddler like behavior.

click to expand

++++++1


The more people realize this the better!