
inlovewithlove
@Lindaaaatje
10 Years
Comments: 2 · Posts: 418 · Topics: 26



Posted by TigerCapThx TigerCap
He probably has a lot on his mind. It kills my libido as well. It's a good thing my Cancer girlfriend has a high one and loves giving backrubs. It helps. 🙂


Posted by AquistormIt isn't just that problem Aquistorm, he doesn't have the " lust feelings" either.
It is quite a big deal to a guy who can't get a boner or anything. Talking about it isn't really on the list on how to take care of the problem. Even though it would probably help somehow.




Posted by ReincarnationThanks.Posted by Magenta_AzureYou're an idiot.
Leaveclick to expand

Posted by Magenta_AzureThat's not a reason to leave .....
Leave








Posted by HappyCapperThx everyone for your responses.
Is this the same cap guy we've heard about before? If it is, I seem to remember that there weren't such problems before. I also seem to remember other things about your relationship and if it is him, I would probably talk to him(casually at first) - not specifically about this, but ask him if there's something on his mind, if there's something at work or whatever, and work from there.
In your relationship, communication is key, imo. I mean, hasn't it always been like this? He pulls away(in one way or the other) and you feel bad. You have got to try to lure him out somewhat(not talking specifically about sex). Maybe he just has a lower libido; we don't know. But we do know that you feel bad, so you need to get an understanding of this...by communicating with him. But in his case, I would start very subtly, luring him out, rather than to go full force. Again, imo.

Posted by SkittyI know that under his " big mouth" there is a little boy with low self esteem. With issues in the past . He lived with a women for 10 years. She constantly cheated on him for years and he did know it. The last four years they lived together , they didn't had sex for 4 years.....
A low libido is common. more- so as you get older.
What he needs to do is take responsibility for himself and go to a doctor, as it could be a sign of something more serious.
I would be really pissed off if it got to the point where we had to have a "talk" about it, as it shows he clearly doesn't value himself.
I'm not sure how close you guys are- but i make doctor/dentist appts for myself and my boyfriend. So if it were me, i would call our doctor, tell him what the situation was and then send him over.

Posted by truecapThanks Truecap. as i mentioned in another message here. Yes there are. And he is " damaged goods". He had multiple relationships who ended dued to infidellity of the women, them taking advantage of him etc. So i think alot is still going on in his mind...
There are some medical conditions and/or medications that can cause a low libido. Depression, diabetes, low testosterone - just to name a couple.

Posted by exxtasyxthat might be the case in many marriages we heard. the man turns out a closet, due to religious reasons. or to family obligations.
Maybe he's not sexually attracted to you. Maybe he's gay.
Posted by LindaaaatjeWell, trying to take your guy's hobbies away from him is, imo, a really bad idea for everyone's sake(unless it's an unhealthy hobby, ofc.), so I totally get that.
Thx for your responds HappyCapper.
My cap and expressing/talking about emotions....not always easy. So going to a psychologist will be rejected lol. He doesn't want to be analysed.
He eats when i say its time to eat something healtier than a coockie. He doesn't always take the time to eat proper because of all the work.
Like today, its 7 o clock in the morning on a sunday and he is painting/spraying a car he is working on in his sparetime to get ready for the rally in march. Lol
But that makes him happy and proud so i let him be.
excercise?? no, no time because it doesn't bring in money lol
Yes i think he is aware that he has a problem because of all the " i love you's " he says to me. But further than that , no, no talking about it because for him it doesn't change anything.
in this year and a half we've been together, there was only 1 time when we had sex were he gave his whole body and soul. All the other times it was/is like he " had the brakes on".
When i mentioned that to him he said " it should always be like that, but it can't" . Then wouldn't talk about it no further.
So difficult sometimes to try to help him if he doesn't want to be helped, or i think that's the case. Maybe he want to sort things out on his own ( yes he is stubborn man lol).
But as a crab, i do have patience. A lot......i just don't want to loose him while waiting....




Posted by faith $ golphinHe works a lot and bring in lots of money. Wich is very important for him. No , he doesn't blame me.
What do he do to keep you happy? I had a man like that before and he use to blame me all the time.

Posted by faith $ golphinIt's been a bit over 2 months now since we had sex....
How often do you guys have sex?
Is their a major difference from before?
Do he be stress out?
Do yall cuddle?
Is it possible he just tired of you?
Theres things you can do to entice him. You will need to know the real problem.
A lot of times when a man stop having sex at home its because he saving it for some one else. I would need to know more about the situation.

Posted by Reincarnationdon't think so..he exhausting himself with all the work/thoughs of how to make more money in his head.
Honestly, it sounds like you are exhausting him.

Posted by LindaaaatjeI honestly wish the best for you, I know how badly it hurts a cancer not to be able to have physical intimacy with our partner and yet we are loyal to a fault and will suffer for the purity of love.
I do understand you CancerLeoDynamite, but i do not give him up...
That's why i am asking " the other caps" what they think about all this. They have a different point of view than us cancers.
If he isn't the one for me or if it is necessary, i will leave him.
Sounds silly but he makes me grow. Emotions are ok but sometimes its better to think with your head instead of our heart. He's teaching me that.
But on the otherhand, i have to teach/let him know that it ok to show feelings or letting go of his brakes.
I am not 20 years old anymore but i do think the sex is necessary to stay bonded.




Posted by DonumDei@DonumDei :-) good one !Posted by LindaaaatjeYou should've just said "yes please, a pair of balls to go!"
He asked me " do you want something for yourself? besides a dick ?"
Ugh...sorry, but he sounds like a total jerk!click to expand
Discover insights, swap stories, and find people. dxpnet is where experiences turn into understanding.
Create Your Free Account →
To other caps: how would you react if you were living with someone and had these issues/problems?