Crazy making!

Yes, now I'm a crazy person. I understand some people have no problem leaving their dog outside while they're away or whatever. BUT, that is not what I do. My dog is NEVER locked out of the house in the yard. The Virgo has lived here since the end of April, he knows this, yet turned around and locked him outside while he went and napped. Mind you, he doesn't like my dog anyway... doesn't like dogs period, they're dirty he says.

I worked rescue for a number of years, you'd be remissed, in my opinion, to leave a bread of dog that can be purchased for a considerable amount of money outside for someone to steal (unless you're in a rural area I suppose). In my area there are also pit bull rings and stealing dogs is not unheard of to be used for pit bull bait.

I told the Virgo, you cannot leave him outside, someone could steal him. Good God, turned into I'm crazy and he will never let my dog even out of the crate again.

What ever happened to "I'm sorry, didn't mean to, I'll be sure to make sure he's inside if I'm going to go to bed"———?

Oh, and the other day, I rescued 2 baby barn swallows. Crazy for that too - and when I say he thinks I'm crazy, he thinks I'm a step away from the insane asylum! These babies still had tufts and were no where near ready to fly. Fallen out of the nest or thought they were ready, whatever. I took them to the bird sanctuary. In the mean time, the momma bird swooped at me a couple of times and then just let me be - she's gone now from the nest all together. I do think animals trust on a certain level, even wild animals (sure, call me crazy). The Virgo threw an absolute fit, why would I waste my time? They're going to die anyway, let the cats get 'em! I followed up with the sanctuary, they were doing fine! So, I'm crazy for looking out for these babies? I'm crazy because I actually look out for the well being of animals in general! *smh*

Sweet story re the baby swallows though... the sanctuary was closed, so I called my ex-Cancer who lives near by (yeah, whatever, keep you opinions to yourself on that). I told him I had the 2 babies and did we still have the fish tank in the basement. He looks, can't find it, "let me make a call". So, I head on over, in the mean time he scores us a tank to put them in. Great! Well, we can't find the syringes I've used in the past to feed babies, so I have to go to the pharmacy. But prior to leaving, I researched and realized we need crickets - cricket juice to be exact :/ So, I head off to the pharmacy to get a syringe to, at minimum, get these guys some water into them. While I'm away, my ex-Cancer goes and hunts crickets. THEN, he get's some straw he had in his back yard and some twist ties and made an actual nest!! Now, tell me, what man would do that? LOL

oh, that next morning, they were even were hopping up on my finger *melts* (yeah, I'm crazy, I know!!! LOL)

And I think it's sad when someone wants to criticize someone for their passion(s), especially when that passion is life itself!

If that makes me crazy, then so be it!

What he's doing is gaslighting you and projecting onto you...If you don't know what projection and gaslight is...google it

Sociopaths hate animals and are known to not care about the well being of animal and mistreat animals...Narcissist like animals in so much as he can secretly control the animal without objections, his love is not for the common reason most normal people love animals, N's want complete control of his desired object and if he mistreats the animal the animal will still love him despite his douchebagery behavior.

Maybe shell out the extra cash to take your pet to a place were he'll be safe like a pet sitting service/business.

I don't know if it's me or the animals to be honest. The baby birds, he was throwing things at them - not intentionally to hit them mind you (per his words) as he was such a GREAT baseball player and knows where he was hitting. YEAH RIGHT!

Oh, and then he tells me, "you're not to leave the barn until I'm ready to". FUCK THAT, I took the birds and left while he was walking the horse!

Ian, read the other thread, we're not in a relationship! Not that kind anyway. What was I supposed to do business wise?? As he put it after I kicked him out, "We have a lot invested together, what should we do?". So, we are where we are, in a business relationship. Yes, he lives with me because financially that's the better bet (my sanity, maybe not so much, but financially, hey good to go!).

ewww, I'm a Cap

if it were only that easy!

Posted by lildol

Oh, and then he tells me, "you're not to leave the barn until I'm ready to". FUCK THAT, I took the birds and left while he was walking the horse!

You left the horse with him? :/

All I know is I don't like being controlled. "The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good." -Samuel Johnson

I don't think I could get away from that guy fast enough.

he's the trainer, idiots!

I have another horse trainer ready to take on my horse (he's a Pisces and we talk extensively about the Virgo)... but they're friends. That trainer also can set my up to lease out my horse trailer (we've talked about it). But, then again, how can I do that to the Virgo and how am I to put his friend in that position?

I have said in a previous threat that I have gotten myself in quite the conundrum!

trade the horse for the horse trailer, that would be good (cost me more, but...) - there we go! Although he can't finance the trailer... see where I'm at?

Well sorry. I haven't read your other posts. However, I would never have let someone with that attitude towards animals touch my horse much less work with her.

I keep the trailer, he keeps the horse... he has no way of making money for himself to even take care of the horse!

flip side, I keep the horse, he keeps the trailer... who's gonna pay for the trailer— It's in my name and I doubt he can get the financing!!!!!!!

Again, no matter what, costs me $ $ $ $ $ - less expensive to stay involved. The horse is going to run soon.

What I am getting is that the two of you bought a race horse (assuming Thoroughbred... or Quarter Horse). Just out of curiosity how old is he/she?

@Sumpiternal: he's an un-raced 2 yo Thoroughbred, our 2nd together - after the last one was claimed, we invested the $ $ in this one. Great potential really, excellent breading. If you know anything, he's a D'Wildcat out of Courtney Lake who was foaled by Meadowlake! Run's like the wind without even asking. Just goes. They have to choke him down 'cause he wants to go!!!

Cut your losses, I'm sure he'll end up selling the horse or the trailer whichever one you choose to exchange to sever the relationship and of course you'll be out of money but I'm sure you know enough and have learned enough to start out on a new business venture that'll be profitable without him.

All I know is this can't go on forever lildol, you'll be forced to make a decision at some point, either way you'll both be taking a hit financially. He's turning more dangerous and eventually he'll be mistreating more than those animals, he'll be doing it to you if you don't woman up and make some hard choices.

I don't know how you can put money over your sanity and safety (safety of your animals)...I sure couldn't

I don't know a whole lot about the racing industry and even less about the modern Thoroughbred bloodlines. My mare's great grandsire on the bottom side was Seattle Slew. I was always into dressage/jumping and grew up around Quarter Horses.

Anyway, I agree with Tiki.

Tiki, I hear what you're saying. The horse is one thing (and, yes, he is in my name), the trailer is another as it is in my name as well. If the Virgo doesn't have the trailer, he can't do business. That makes me feel bad on some level if I were to restrict him from doing business. But, at the same time, is he going to pay me for the trailer - I know him well enough now, he wants to hold on to his money as long as possible - and I have heard enough from others in general about his payment history. The horse, well, if he runs well, which he should, hopefully I'll somehow be able to get out of this - that is what I'm looking at! I may end up in a loss, but if we can pay off the trailer loan he can go on his way!! Did you think for one moment I didn't think this through on a financial level— I can't cut ALL losses! I'll eat the taxes on the horse, that's for sure. But, then again, I pay for all his vetting, feed, and what not... should all come out in the wash!

Personally, I'd take the horse over the trailer. Bigger risk as I can rent out the trailer. But, I have a lot of faith in the horse!

Horses are expensive in general and I can only imagine the cost for a race horse. Other than training what has/is this virgo guy contributing financially or otherwise?

Tiks, as far as safety, I do the best I can. I was ready to leave tonight, he left instead, which is fine. Ya know, the man says he wouldn't hurt any animal (despite his criticisms of me saving them), but my dog is scared of him for some reason - and my dog loves everyone! I know - usually always best judges of character...

"If the Virgo doesn't have the trailer, he can't do business. That makes me feel bad on some level if I were to restrict him from doing business."

he'll be back in business soon after the ties are severed, men are resilient like that. I don't for one second believe you are responsible for a grown man, he'll figure something out.

"The horse, well, if he runs well, which he should, hopefully I'll somehow be able to get out of this - that is what I'm looking at! I may end up in a loss, but if we can pay off the trailer loan he can go on his way!! Did you think for one moment I didn't think this through on a financial level— I can't cut ALL losses! I'll eat the taxes on the horse, that's for sure. But, then again, I pay for all his vetting, feed, and what not... should all come out in the wash!"

I see, you have a good point but I hope you have a plan B and C in place just in case this horse doesn't come through, the horse and trailer is yours right? Plan B if the horse isn't a breadwinner then selling the horse should be on the agenda and plan C could be you allowing someone else to take over the lease on the trailer, you should break even and maybe even make a bit of a profit off of the horse.

animals can sense danger....It wouldn't surprise me one bit if he's mistreating the dog while your away.

First off, I sorry to hear that your in this situation.. But I have faith in you.. If anyone can number crunch and plot the way out of this its a cap.. I'm no virgo expert but it would seem that he's trying to get under your skin, being vengeful toward you, your choices, and the things you care about.. 😢 That, I'm really sorry to hear.. and is bull shit pussy way to go about being upset or rejected..

Cheer up thou, I know you'll find some way to work it all out... Sit your ass down over here.. lnana and I already have drinks pour'd for ya while you ponder... lol

Also on another note: I love the thing about you taking in the little swallows.. When I was a kid my mom (Also a Cap) and I made a bad ass team.. I was always finding hurt animals and bringing them to her, then we'd nurse em back to health and set em free (live'd in the country).. I can say, as a kid, I've for a short time each. Had pet finch, turtle, quail, adolescent squirrel, tons of robins, and a bunch of other stuff.. Ohh even a raven... Yup, thats right, I had blacky the raven.. haha..
Oh and a hawk too.. Although I don't know that I can count him since it was only for a day.. Turns out you need a raptor license or something to even nurse a hawk back to health so we had to hand it over to forest ranger station who gave it to a wildlife rehabilitation center or something like that... But my Cap mom still drove me to visit Gawk the hawk(Shuddup, I was a kid, and I still think I came up with kickass names)... lol Come to think about it, my dad(Virgo) would always roll his eyes when he saw us dragging a cage out and making a temp home.. haha.. Yeah, we where a bad ass team though.. haha

Posted by Sempiternal
Horses are expensive in general and I can only imagine the cost for a race horse. Other than training what has/is this virgo guy contributing financially or otherwise?

Wise beyond your years! I hear SOMEONE laughing in the background (knowingly all along), I won't say who!

Posted by tiki33
"If the Virgo doesn't have the trailer, he can't do business. That makes me feel bad on some level if I were to restrict him from doing business."

he'll be back in business soon after the ties are severed, men are resilient like that. I don't for one second believe you are responsible for a grown man, he'll figure something out.

"The horse, well, if he runs well, which he should, hopefully I'll somehow be able to get out of this - that is what I'm looking at! I may end up in a loss, but if we can pay off the trailer loan he can go on his way!! Did you think for one moment I didn't think this through on a financial level— I can't cut ALL losses! I'll eat the taxes on the horse, that's for sure. But, then again, I pay for all his vetting, feed, and what not... should all come out in the wash!"

I see, you have a good point but I hope you have a plan B and C in place just in case this horse doesn't come through, the horse and trailer is yours right? Plan B if the horse isn't a breadwinner then selling the horse should be on the agenda and plan C could be you allowing someone else to take over the lease on the trailer, you should break even and maybe even make a bit of a profit off of the horse.

Tiki,you know I already have everything planned out! I'm a Cap, what else would I do?? LOL This is why I have things already set up with another trainer as well as someone who could help me lease the trailer!!

As for the horse, the Virgo thinks the horse has issues - what race horse doesn't? (this is a continuous argument with us - I've told him if it were Secretariat he would think here were issues! And he would!!!) Our last horse had issues and won probably almost $ 50k as of his last race - glass half empty *smh*

So, that being said, he would like to see our current boy claimed. Maybe he wants out too!

Seems there is a light at the end of the tunnel...He'll work your nerves of course through out the whole process lol but hopefully the ending is in sight.

@Taur: that resonates with me! My mom was always the same way, taking in babies or youngins' to nurture them back to health. I'm the only one of 4 that took to that though. I grew up and do just as my mom would! Funny story (I think), I took in this one bird, had my kids with me with books in a bag, made them take 'em out and carry them because a half mile home as I thought it was an injured blackbird. Upon looking at it after we got home realized I had a young crow. Do you know they eat 1/2 pound of bugs per day? Anyway, I start feeding this guy, within hours he was hopping on my hand, so I let him out of the box in my house. I was laying on the floor watching TV and he perched upon my hip. Funny as hell. Anyway, I couldn't feed him what he needed so the next day I brought him to the sanctuary... he sat on my shoulder the whole way there! I was so heart broken!

Posted by Pb
Umm, even if you were in a rural area, your dog can be taken. Your dog, your house, your wishes. He should respect them.

I know all too well. And yes, he should respect my wishes... instead he turns it into, "I'm never letting your dog out again!"

Posted by tiki33
animals can sense danger....It wouldn't surprise me one bit if he's mistreating the dog while your away.

On some level I do wonder. My dog is not an "attack" dog. He's very much a lover and loves everyone. But, yeah, with this guy he's very reserved and it's clear he wants nothing to do with him.

I simply can't believe he left him outside like that! He said, I just went upstairs to lay down for a minute, I left the door open... yeah, what's open, unlocked? This is a man for the life of him would never lay down in bed without the door being closed (unlocked, yes, maybe, because I'd be home in an hour. Open? Absolutely NOT - he's a Virgo, are you kidding me?).

There is no doubt in my mind that he didn't give a shit and simply left him out there intentionally!

And you know what, he doesn't know crazy... if my dog went missing as a result, THEN he'd see crazy!

Posted by tiki33
animals can sense danger....It wouldn't surprise me one bit if he's mistreating the dog while your away.

Commenting on this again, I also believe they sense safety and security. This is why the mom sparrow swooped down a couple times while I was talking to her young to protect them and then just perched above watching me. I (would like to) think she realized I was going to help them. But, then again, I'm a little crazy like that in my thinking 🙂

How does a narcissist say he's sorry? Simple. He doesn't. He would probably laugh in your face if he knew you thought he should make one for putting the dog outside. OR they apologise whilst laying all the blame on you as they do it.

They're so mind-blowingly boring once you see through their disguise.

When they stop even bothering to disguise themselves and the real them shows through - it's an indication that they just want to funk you around until they find something or someone better to play with. Walking away is the hard part because they really have made you crazy and wanting revenge by that stage. The only revenge is cutting them out of your life completely, whether you are in business with them or not. Or making them fear you.

Posted by lildol

Posted by Sempiternal
Horses are expensive in general and I can only imagine the cost for a race horse. Other than training what has/is this virgo guy contributing financially or otherwise?

Wise beyond your years! I hear SOMEONE laughing in the background (knowingly all along), I won't say who!

click to expand

Has he contribuated anything, other than his abilities as a trainer, during this business partnership?