how to get back on track with him/libra man

hello all~ i need your help. i've never done anything like this but like a cancer i up all stuck on emotions with this fella. I'm not one to sleep with a guy right away but in this case i did. i talked to him fpr about 2 weeks and he was into me. actually he was totally after me and i really didn't care much about it. nut i finally gave him the time and day and by the second time we hung out i was in his bed. now i know he was still totally into me but the woman or lets just say the cancer in me started to feel attached right away. we get along and he is so amazing. well actually he just dances really good and he is pretty hot but he laughs so cute and we get along fine. h4e just doesn't show me the affection that i want. i feel that when i am around i want to be all wrapped in his arms. the little things that matter like a call throughout the day or when we make plans i would want him to commit to them. but i cant help but feel like he thinks he has me and is over really trying. i need to get my self back together. i am not an ugly girl and i know he is attracted to me, i've tried to tell him i was over it but he totally switched it up by telling me wheat i wanted to hear but it was like thats all he did... nothings changed. i feel like he is just not my type. again as i mentioned earlier he is hot, a great dancer and a cool person to talk to here and there but to be honest im getting over it. i dont want to hough only because i can really see us working out. i feel its me that is thinking tomuch.. but is it i mean i should have wheat i want. i need help.. i just want him to want me.. hahah who is here to help.. and note this is not just to get an evil revenge. i do like him im just frusterated. i feel i pushed him away because of my emotions, but he is still here so i just need back my mojo...

confused cancer~

ok sorry about the spelling problem. im at work trying to be on the DL.. so bare with me xoxo

You say he is not your type...so why put yourself thru this?

well he is my type i guess I feel i messed up how he felt about me by getting all into him. i voiced out how i felt like how i am a good woman for him etc, i wanted him to see what was infront of him and this happened a few times but i know he is still into me because i tried to end it. he said i just have to relax and let things happen which is true but i want a guy that is going to show that affection you know? its like im wasting my time but i do really like him but im confused because i dont know what is going on.. is it true how i feel or is it just the challenge because before at one point after we had sex i tried to leave him with confidence and then thats when he freaked and didn't want me to leave. he told me some deep stuff only to put me back on this emotional rollercoaster... it was what i wanted to hear but he is still the same.. i feel like i thin about him all day and i have to force myself not to call him and wait on him but i dont want that...i just want him to be more affectionate...to show me that he is in to me..i am such a cancer.. we need to feel safe.

Hmmmm I thought libras were supposed to be affectionate? My fiancee is.

Anyway your first post contradicts your last one. You need to figure out what YOU want before you can even begin to figure out what you want from him.

well i know that once you have a libra they are the best loversand afeectionate and that is what i want. i want to grow with someone. That why i stay. i feel we can work but i just want him to want me as much as i do at this point. i need to know where he wants to take it. i am confused i just know that i am suffering inside because i feel like i just want him to know how i feel and get it! i dont want to explain myself this much and i have told him but he is still the same with me. its annoying. he want me to go at his pace but i am different. im not saying that i want him to love me or fall at my feet i just would like the casual calls. i mean i feel it should be at least at that point. i feel he is kinda getting over it but doesn't know what he wants himself. I dont want to give up but i feel why shouls i even try this hard.and that is what hurts.it's pathetic

Actually, that is exactly how my ex-libra (now just friends) treated me. Came on really strong and then cooled way off, vanish, pop back up and try to pick up where he left off. When I tried ending it several times he'd open up and pour out his heart and soul and I'd be hooked again. I Finally got off that roller coaster ride (as that's all it is for that kind of a Libra.BTW they're not all like that) The part I will never understand is that my ex-bf was the one that wanted an exclusive committed relationship but once I agreed......he wasn't in it like he should have been.

Save yourself the heart ache now and just go back to being friends. This guy sounds more like a guy that genuinely likes you but is more into you for the sex. FWB if you're willing. If you're up to that then go for it. Otherwise, don't EVER expect him to be anything more then he is right now with you. That "kind" of Libra just can't bring it to the table on a regular basis.

They make a waaaaaaay better friend then BF.

omg i know i told him that sooo many times!! He says that i wont let it work out, and i get it but i feel like he is only hearing what he wants to hear. ME COMPLAINING!.It funny because i told him i just see him as a friend but he was mad about that. i think he does just want the sex. i told him i didn't want to have sex becaus i wanted to get to know him on a different level and agreed but what do you thin happen i of course slept with him again because i knoew that would please him.. its sick that i would want him only to want me.. i know what i deserve and your right he wont change... i guess its because i stayed away from relationships and he totally charmed me. i went from not interested to feeling desperate.. ( which is not the case) i just feel maybe thats what he thinks and i want to fix that. but i guess its not worth it. i know what i want and i shold have it~

I feel youuu. You really like(d) him. But the way he acts makes you doubt yourself and you start to feel insecure. Right? Move on to someone that makes you feel good about yourself. In this world us girls don't need another reason to feel insecure.

Arrrrggghhhhh.... same old stories.

I agree with HP

I am a cancer - sooooooo sensitive and clingy
BUT - that was BEFORE
When I learned some art of becoming cool regarding things and life and love,
There it started I established a solid character
Next a solid relationship
It is hard to change oneself - harder to change another
Try to build more confidence and accept things for whatever happens
If it turned out good - better
If it turned out bad - you are prepared
Sometimes the trouble with us is we anticipate things
Only to hurt ourselves by such imaginations
Live one day at a time....it works

Goodluck!

so the day before yesturday he mentioned that he wanted to hang out out tomorrow (yesturday) and he didn't call. i didn't call either. It really pissed me off just because he makes plans and then is flaky. he is a bboy and he does work 2 jobs so i understand that he is busy but what he cant call me?? i dont know what to think. i m happy that you guys are here to help. you really did. i dont like the fact that im clingy i want to change. not for him but for myself. when it comes down to it i know that uy isnt for me. he is cool but i want someone that is going to feel the same for me. its his lose! plus last night i went out and met a cutie pie named max and he is a taurus~ hahaha whoa already in love...jkjkjk.. but it made me feel nice that even though i wa pretty hurt with the libra, i still had guys he whole night lobvin on me~. Jinggay i like what you said. i really want to know what you did to change a bit... you look so beautiful, its almost like these guys are stupid for not wanting to cling back~ 🙂

Hi cancerwitemo

Thank you for the nice comment. Cause you see we cancers are super sensitive.
We cry at a "slightest" ignore people threw at us. I was like that....not anymore.
I have been hurt, not many times but many many many times. Then, I said " I should not get hurt, I am a wonderful being. I have good love inside me. I am loyal. I deserve to be loved back. It's in my mind. Not at the back it's right infront.

Then I started to lift my chin, I avoid trying-hard attention-getter style . I ignore others too. Appeared tough at any circumstances. Showed to anyone men and women that I am full of confidence. I speak moderately, changed my wardrobe from conservative to cool. I avoided people that I think will pull me down. I enjoyed being alone, the nights, read books, watch movies, wine and internet. Then..........I noticed men swoon now. Even friends come to me even an uninvited friendship , it is coming. BUT - you cannot avoid the people who are not pleased with you. The way to treat them is "ignore".

I think most men like a woman who can carry herself well and can talk anything from sensible to flirty to fun to serious. They like a woman who is able to smile. A woman who is light and bubbly. I tried learning it one by one and I love what I turned out to be. Not changing the way I am but learning more to be better. And it worked. Guys are everywhere now, but I am more careful now. "I tried best to think like a man".

Before I have the courage to did all these I have shed valley of tears. It's very okay to. because after all the tears are gone, all that's left are strenghts. Everytime I get hurt, I try to cry it out. Because I become stronger after.

That Libra guy I liked was really charming, but I have assesed him as a part of my search for the right fit. Not the end of the road....the road is long......

Hi, today I decided to send this final letter to the Libra I care about but cant just figure out :

I love your way
The songs
The poems
The calls
The beautiful messages
The pictures of you
BUT
That was before.........................
One day if we ever meet - I wish
Hope you wearing those smiles
Smiles that say you found the magical feeling you long for
And me - wearing one
Because I finally let go the dreams of you
Please enjoy your stay
I'm going to really miss you
And - dont expect me to forget you
But tonight I will ask GOD to help me let you go

The road is long.........................
I better get going
There is a stone on the road
Deserves my attention
Got to pick it up
Before I end up sorry again

Do take care,
From the woman named Jing

ok so the update with the libra. After he had dissed me the other day and didnt call he called the next day to invite me to an angels game. and although i wanted to say yes i held back. he never apologized or anything he just left a vm saying that some shit went down.. "what is that" he always has excuse and i really dont think its other girls i just think he smokes so much that he is just careless. any way i havent answered his calls and he basically left me a vm saying that and that he knows that i am mad because i am not answering any of his text or calls and that he said he was calling to say bye he put it on me.. .. he said i guess you wanted to tie the knott but that he was just trying to get to know me.. errrr the reason why i was soo annoyed by him was because of his actions. alli wanted was some time with hima and everytime we chilled it was late, or at is house and he was stoned or i was too. but besides that the point is that i was trying to fight the negatib=ve feeling i was getting. if im gonna hook up with someone i just want toget to kow him and spend some good times i mean how in the hell was he trying to get to ow me?? he didn;t even call me hahah i think what he meant was he sisnt want t get to kow me and that he wanted to use mewhen he wanted like a bomb ass pair of new shoes. and im not down with that. i felt like i was wastin my time with him.... err it was soo annoying.. i felt like telling him that i was only acting the way i way becaus i was fighting my own standards for that lame. i was fighting to try to still lke him. he is cool but i was getting over it and i didn't want him to loose out on me. hahah aoh well i feel really good right now. even though he is not in my life any more i just know that my happiness means more. i know what i am worth and what i can do for a man and if he cant see that its only beause he didn;t want to and that fine. i want a man any way not some pot head. i swear i wasn't pushing but i dont think any one can stand excuses after the next and someone that will claim to care sooo much and say that they want to get to know you when they dont try...

Wow! You gone far...halleluiah!!!!

Carry on my lady....

Congrats! Keep moving forward.