Will Libra male come back

Just wondering really, if when Libra men do the disappearing thing and end up saying they dont know what they want. Do you they ever come back or is that it done and dusted.

Could you tell me the worst and best things to do to get him back. Thanks x

michele3R

I have been going through this for 8 months with my Libra...I have asked for endless advice from the people on this post and they have all told me the same thing, he is not ready, move on...I did move on, but he kept contacting me and kept hurting me because I let him..Now I just want to be friends and he wants more (now that i'm dating someone else)...but because he has hurt me so much and I let him do this, I am now unsure of a relationship with him...I have seen a side of him that is very cold-hearted and plain mean..

I no longer trust him like I did before, I will continue to be friends and we have a business relationship as well, but that is all I have to offer him...The more I distance myself the more he wants me, but I know it's just a game...And if by chance it is real, it is too late..

So, my advice to you is that if you really care about this person, leave it alone and move on...If it is real he will come back when he is ready...If you continue to see him and contact him when he is not ready he will continue to hurt you...And chances are you will not want him in the end, the heart can only take so much...

Don't try to get him back...

yep what is meant to be is meant to be...you can't force it. Get on with your life and be happy...that is the only way 🙂

hurt-heart I am so proud of you - you have come a LONG way 🙂

Wow! HURT, I do not know you but I am so impressed. For sure women who have the same trouble with their libras will benefit from your advise. Like me.

Kudos.

Thanks for your message hurt heart.

He dissappeared for 2 weeks didnt call me back. I left him to it. After a week he was driving past my house! Actually drove past me i pretended i didnt see him and beeped me at the bottom of the road. He even stood in the middle of a dancefloor blatantly staring at me for a 30 secs. I again pretended i didnt see him. Id had enough by 2 weeks so i text him asked him out for a drink he said he was ill how am i etc.. he should be well next week. About a week later i text him saying shall we go for a drink this week. He then replied not sure we should not sure i want anything at the min!! Before his dissappearance he was totally into texting, speaking seeing me every week. Making grand gestures, presents etc. So what the hell happend! Anyway i said fine i can see i meant nothing to you by the way you have just dropped me. He said it wasnt like that he just doesnt know what it is he wants. I text back saying i thought he was the most amazing guy id ever met and make sure he stays special. He replied that was so nice and for me to take care x —? Its been 4 weeks tomorrow since that message. Ive changed my number deleted him as a friend on facebook and i havent been anywhere near where he goes. Im hoping he'll realise hes made a mistake and come back. Do libras do that from your experience. I promise i wont go after him. He hurt me so much i couldnt do it if i tried.
When your libra finished with you at first how long did he take to come back? If you dont mind me asking sorry! Was it when you were getting on with your life etc.. xx

Thank Chatz

The tables have turned now!! I feel really good and he's freaking out...Sometimes I feel sorry for him but then I remember how much he hurt me...He could have chose to leave me alone and come back when he was ready, but he didn't...He is still trying to hurt me by lashing out, last week he told me I was mad at him because he didn't want me before and then 10 minutes later he asked me if I would have a baby with him and be his family...

He is really confused and i'm just fluffing it all off...Life goes on!!

Praises to you HURT....!!!

Michelle3R

There was times when we didn't speak for over a month to month and a half...And I can't tell you how many times he wrote or said take care!! How impersonal. he even emailed me once and told me to have a good life...My libra is going through a divorce and his wife cheated on him, he pursued me and then freaked out...He has come back a few times and told me that he is just scared and when I bite he backs off again..Not buying it anymore!!! If he really cared about me he would have worked through his fear and made it work..I wonder if he has abaondment issues, he has said some pretty weird things and asking me to have a baby with him is really weird...He already has two little kids and my daughter is 17...He has told me numerous times that he dosen't want more kids...

So this leaves 3 options: He is afarid that if we are together, I will eventually leave because he has small kids and mine are grown up, having a baby would ensure another reason to stay..

He is trying to see if I (as he says) still dig him...too boost his own ego

or he is just plain fucked up...

Months ago, I would have convinced myself it was number one option...Now I 100% vote for number two and number three...Boosting his ego and fucked up!!!

Michelle honestly, you will drive yourself nuts analyzing everything he says and writes..
talk to chatz and queenscorpio, they have lots of good advice to give..

I must admit I do still have a strong attraction to him, and I probably will slip up in the intimate part, actually already have, but the emotions are gone, he can't hurt me anymore...

with that kind of behavior and treatment, michelle, why would you want him to come back? a man in love with you or who at least respected you wouldn't do those things to you. when he texted "take care" and didn't bother to call you or contact you for 4 weeks, that was your sign to move on, so do it honey - do it!

If he can't give you the respect you deserve, at least give it to yourself.

Michele: "Anyway i said fine i can see i meant nothing to you by the way you have just dropped me. He said it wasnt like that he just doesnt know what it is he wants."

HH: "If he really cared about me he would have worked through his fear and made it work"



Michele .. I've told you before, and HH, that Libras can't be dealt with this way to have a successful relationship with them. There are other signs who would respond within your expectations if they are approached with backwards guilt .. but, not Libras.

Backwards guilt = if you cared, you would do (this)
Since you did (this) it means I don't mean anything to you

They process EVERYTHING logically .. will wiegh every word, every intention, every tone, every hidden meaning .... when you said that to him and he said he didn't mean it that way and then backed off further .. now he's sitting back acknowledging that you tried to guilt him into saying that you do mean something to him .. and a Libra will NOT react to this in the way in which you expected. Instead, they will pull away further.

If you do move-on, which it looks like is your only choice at this point .. then don't play with him to get an emotional response, such as it appears HH is doing .. "The tables have turned now!! I feel really good and he's freaking out" ....... a persons heart isn't a game. It shouldn't be about getting even, or some kind of score.

Certainly, your heart is aching, and I'm sorry about that 😢 ... but, just make sure you don't do something horrible, like feeling good about any pain he may be suffering ... if you're moving on, then doso with memories of when the union was beautiful, and not for the purpose of making him suffer for hurting your feelings. That's just fucked up and will damage your own soul.

There is no throne ... if you have an attitude of thinking you're a Princess and he is to bow down to you .. then you've lost him. Libras just don't cater to Primadonna's .. if he senses that you believe how you feel supercedes how he feels .. then you've lost him.

Houston Peach.

I so know what your talking about i completely agree. Usually id be like hes a loser and move on. But i just cannot work out how he feels about me to move on. I dont believe he could possibly spend the whole of valentines weekend with me taking me out, wanting to see me etc.. and then dissappear cos he dosent care about me. My poor little brain cant understand it lol.

Why on earth drive past my house, and stare at me on the dancefloor if he doesnt care. I dont get it! All his mates incuding him said he doesnt usually be the way he was with girls. I just wonder if i scared him off. I told him to leave seeing me the week after valentines as he was cocky with me on the phone. The thing is maybe that was my intuition saying uht no thanks.

Ive also changed my mobile number literally a week after he sent that aww take care x patronising message. So i dont even know if hes tried to call but i do know if he was that bothered he would come to my house. I dunno its been 2 months since him disappearing i cant get him out of my head! I hate it! I keep analysing how he was with me. I,m nearly 28 had 2 serious relationships and lots and lots of flings. Ive never met anyone who i thought was so amazing and real it wasnt all bullsh*t talk or anything just how he was with me. The little things he did. I want to call him right now! Lol... I need help! lol.. I hate feeling this way if he aint bothered but i just feel it in my stomach that he does care. If he cares he will come back to me wont he? I have to just get on with it and hope it makes me stronger x

P Angel. I miss him so much. I just wish i could make things right. But i cant. Everything i seem to do seems to be so wrong in your eyes.

Its actually been left really nicely. I told him he was the most amazing guy ive ever met and that i will miss him. I said to him to make sure that he stays special and keep singing really loud.

I didnt expect a reply ie - trying to make him feel guilty as you keep saying i am. I was trying to let him know i thought the world of him whatever mess ive made of things and to let him go as i cant force him to do something he doesnt want to.

He did reply however, he said that is really nice, aww take care x

Ive changed my number a week later as my ex of 4 years got hold of the number. So i dont even know if hes tried to contact me in these 4 weeks.

I want to contact him and make everything right but I cant! if i do that then i know it will make things worse. So please stop telling me im trying to make him feel guilty! Cos im not! and if hes going to dissappear on me for me mentioning things that hurt me hes never wanted me!
I just wish i never met him, I think he makes me cry everyday for 2 months. Its pathetic that im hurting so much over someone who cares less about me

"Everything i seem to do seems to be so wrong in your eyes."

First of all, Michele .. he is not here, you are. I cannot respond to anything he's done or said, because he isn't here to answer for himself. Something has gone wrong with this relationship, seriously wrong ... and no blame or reason can be speculated, for to doso would be unfair to him, since he is not present for accountibility. You are.

"So please stop telling me im trying to make him feel guilty!"

What you said to him was for that intent.

"Anyway i said fine i can see i meant nothing to you by the way you have just dropped me."

I'm sorry if it hurts, but, it's the truth .. when you said that to him, you did so within a motivation of wanting him to say something emotional to you which suggests that you do mean something to him.

My purpose in saying these things to you isn't for finding fault, or trying to place blame .. it's to let you see what the motivation is behind .. the psychology. People, mostly women, use emotional manipulation .. and I'm guilty of this, too .. so, this isn't about anything you've done wrong .. it's just about pointing out psychologically, what happens when certain behaviour is expressed.

And women DO do this .. all the time. Our emotions are so deep and intense, and we want to be wanted so damn bad .. that we use how we feel about the guy against them to get them to respond within what we need to feel loved.

My words aren't about who is right or who is wrong .. they never have been, even with the original thread you started about Matt. My aim is only to point out within what you post, as to areas in which need to be analyzed so that you can try to find out what has gone wrong.

People come to these boards all the time, saying they need help, they need advise, they are confused ... but, what they are really looking for is someone to side with them compassionately, and only tell them what it is they want to hear to make them feel better. And I won't do that .. if someone is asking for another for insight into what happened, then I'm going to tell them ... call it brutal, if you choose, but, it's also the truth.

And the truth is ... what has gone wrong with this relationship is all about attitude, and not deeds done. I told you this from the very beginning. You are expecting a certain treatment from him, and to get this treatment, you are using emotional manipulation which is backfiring on you .. it backfires with all women

Think about this from reverse .. what if a guy told you ..

"Anyway i said fine i can see i meant nothing to you by the way you have just dropped me."


Then turned around and sent you a text saying ..

"I text back saying i thought he was the most amazing guy id ever met and make sure he stays special."



Mixed signals right there ... one side infers "fuck off", the other side infers "I love you".

This is an manipulation, Michele, to get him to respond to you emotionally. And women do it all the time .. and I tell them all the time about it. Every relationship we have fails because of it, and we turn around and do it again, and again, and again .. because we just want to be wanted, to be loved, and will use or say anything at our disposal to get him to respond to us emotionally.

And .. I'm telling you .. a Libra cannot be dealt with in this fashion. People (women) go through this all the time .. they come in here saying that their Libra won't tell them they love them, or pulls away and acts indifferent, or says they don't know what they want .. and I tell all of them ... their fucking Libras .. they will NOT respond according to percieved expectations that are expressed with any kind of emotional guilt or manipulation.

Again .. this is about the psychology of it. You said you wanted help, and this is real help. It isn't a shoulder to cry on, or taking sides in any way ... it's about the emotional differences between two people, and some of the things that need to be pondered if you really want to know what has happened that went wrong.

If you want to know how to fix it, then you have to know what has gone wrong .. and the only thing I can respond to is your part you played in this because you are here, he is not.

P - Angel

Yes i understand.

The sentence i sent him was:- I thought i would text you after a couple of weeks as i thought that this was all over nothing. But now i see by the way you have just dropped me it was me that meant nothing.

Perhaps i wanted him to justify why he dropped me yes and maybe realise that it wasnt nice. As not calling someone for 2 weeks then saying 2 weeks after that when i ask him to go for a drink. Not sure we should not sure i want anything at the min.

I couldnt believe how cold and mean he could be (is that me being demanding again).

I wasnt intentionally trying to trick him or make him feel he should be with me out of guilt.

He replied to the text saying its not like that its just that since we were together i just dont know what it is that i want and to go back to how things were would be unfair to you.

My idea of a brief explanation i was ok with that rather than his pathetic not sure at the min text like i was a one night stand!

and thats when i said he was amazing etc..stay special and that was that.

Honestly p angel how can i mess things up with my attitude if im clearly making the effort to put it right. He mustnt want things to be right between us.

Can i really have put him completely off me with one text cos thats when he dissappeared!

It hurts so much that i thought we had something special and im beginning to see now we did not.

Im feeling so deluded at the minute. If he really cared about me hed be with me wouldnt he. So why am i suffering over someone who doesnt care. The truth is i think he does (like i said deluded lol) and im holding out for him realising he does want to be with me and comes back.

Im ok with your comments you can be as harsh and honest as you must. Just believe me when i say i wasnt intentionally trying to do what it is that it appears to you im doing. perhaps i need to think about how i come across but the intention isnt there honest xx

P Angel.

How in your opinion can i sort this out then on a libra level?

I think there is no nothing more i can do. But cry my eyes out! x

I'm going to point some things out:

"I just wish i could make things right" What did YOU do wrong?

"Everything i seem to do seems to be so wrong in your eyes." You directed this at P-Angel. You didn't date P-Angel, you dated this guy. We all act and react differently to situations. You're here asking for advice.

"I want to contact him and make everything right but I cant" You said you left everything right and not expecting a reply, so why this response?

You're crying over this guy when it's evident he didn't care for you sweetie. If what you've typed is true and correct, all of us reading this is looking at this from the outside and see it from a different perspective because we're not emotionally attached to the situation.

Delete every text message, every email, every voicemail you have from him. You are holding onto this and this baggage is going to carry with you onto the next guy, which won't be fair to him or you.

Are you Taurus?

"Honestly p angel how can i mess things up with my attitude if im clearly making the effort to put it right. He mustnt want things to be right between us."


It's not intentional, Michele .. it's gender differences. Women HAVE to have emotional nurturing to feel sane, and we use these tatics all the time. Look at all the relationship stories we find in here, and 99% of them are saying this exact thing ..... a woman's desperate heart will cause her to do anything to capture him .. anything.

We're all guilty (women) .. and I am also because I'm female. To you if he doesn't respond to this, then it means he doesn't care enough. This is an emotional expectation.

Look at it in reverse, and maybe you'll see what I'm saying ..

What if your man told you that if you didn't fuck him every morning when he woke up, and then at night before sleep, then it meant you didn't love him, or care enough about him? You'd freak out, any woman would freak out .. because this is an expectation on his part in which you have to prove you care about him.

Men are men, Michele .. women are women .. they can't be conflated.

Men expect women to show thier love through the physical = sex
Women expect men to show their love through the emotional = heartfelt

Men balk at emotional trapping .. women balk at physical trapping .. this is life. Successful relationships aren't built around either two of those .. and those relationships last a life-time, for it's about respect.

He's a guy AND a Libra .. so, it's a double-whammy. And no, it's not intentional, but, it still happens subconsciously.

The guys wanting and trying to trap women sexually happens all the time, also ... if a woman isn't sexy, she isn't even considered.

Think about that ...... if you don't use your sex appeal, then he won't even give you a second glance .. if he isn't forthcoming with emotions then a girl won't give him any respect.

Understand what your saying P-Angel in regards to emotional manipulation, but it is very easy to respond in this manner when the other person is doing it to you...However, someone must rise above the games and manipualtion and stop it....This is what I chose to do with my Libra, and yes I do feel really good and yes, the tables have turned..He is really freaking out... Am I happy that he is unhappy, no, but I am happy that I am no longer crying and that I am not letting him hurt me anymore...YES...

I took control of my own feelings...and chose to move on, not to hurt him or play games with his heart as you are implying, but to stop him from playing games with my heart..

If you consider this emotional manipulation, so be it..I consider it moving on ...

Too lazy to read all the posts, but yes they come back over and over and over again, until you kick them out for good. LOL!!! Kidding depending on the situation but they normally come back a couple times.

P-A wow! Are you sure you don't have scorp in you. You are one blunt fish! HH yeah, it is hard but it will take time to completely get over him no one can tell you when. It is up to you.

M3 you will never be able to force him to be or do what you want. He either wants to be with you or not. Out of your control.

***Before his dissappearance he was totally into texting, speaking seeing me every week. Making grand gestures, presents etc. So what the hell happend! ***

You played games with him pretending not to see him when he drove by and ignoring him while he stared at you on the dance floor. He doesn't take you serious either. You also up and changed your number. Librans are not normally rude, like a scorp I know. They won't just pop up at your house. Sorry dear. If you feel like calling him then do so. Explain to him honestly what you feel then you can have closure either way.

***There is no throne ... if you have an attitude of thinking you're a Princess and he is to bow down to you .. then you've lost him. Libras just don't cater to Primadonna's .. if he senses that you believe how you feel supercedes how he feels .. then you've lost him***

However, if they know you are special to them they will fight for you. Not give up. I have had two do this for me. One still.

Michele3 you've been hearing this same rhetoric from asking me in PM's about this guy for the last few weeks. Breakups suck! The up and down waves do subside.

It isn't that you didn't mean anything to him, because you did. So stop letting that eat you up wondering. You did. OK? The promise of meaning something MORE to him was withdrawn abruptly and then kind of fell apart for the two of you. That's unfortunate. You've dealt with things the best way you knew how and that is NOT wrong. That's all anyone does. We all handle things the best way we know how.

I'll re-iterate that you need to move on. If he discovers you do mean more to him one day he'll find you regardless of whether you've changed your number or not. He obviously knows where you live he could drive by again if he wanted. If he does, wave him over and talk to him next time. Stop punishing yourself by sitting around wondering whether he will or will not. Go OUT. Have FUN. You won't know if he, or another guy, is out there waiting for you if you're closing your self off to the opportunity by staying home dwelling on what happened.

QS, same thing I've been telling her. If a man desires you, he'll do just about anything to get your attention. They'll come find you wherever you are and they'll keep coming back.

I ended things with my Libra awhile back because of the vanishing and pulling away all the time and took things between us abruptly back to JUST being friends. But he keeps trying to get it back to relationship status. I'm not going there again with him.He knows it. But he keeps trying. He had his chance a few times with me but he didn't care enough about me at the time to concern himself with how much he was hurting me when I told him. So now that I no longer want the romantic relationship........he's willing to do anything. The sad part is ......I've already moved on emotionally. He's offering too little too late.

Met a new Libra and a Gemini and I don't even think about my ex-libra much anymore. I still adore him but too busy dating and getting to know someone new. I hope you do the same Michele. You're a very smart, sweet, beautiful, woman so get out there and SHINE all that you've got !!! It reduces the waves of low points you're feeling I assure you.

(((hugs Michele))))

Thank you all so much for your messages. Today was a really bad day! For a few weeks ive been doing well just today ive been a bit over emotional.

Im learning alot. And if he does come back im not going to play anymore games and i will try to be less emotional and manipulative. Cos its getting me nowhere lol.

It was unfortunate that i changed my number but my ex of 4 years who i really struggled to break away from got hold of it. That wasnt a game with Libra. That was something i was upset about doing. But it had to be done. I was scared due to me feeling vunerable i would meet up with my ex again x x

"You are one blunt fish!"

It's the only way to roll, QS.

Arianlatay .. you're birthday is tomorrow? The 17th? That's my favorite day of the year, no lie .... my dream man to whom I'm madly in love with (in fantasy 😛) was born on that day. April 17, 1959.


"you can talk a man into putting a downpayment on your house"

lol, I'm living in it now 🙂

I saw that thread, the fight .. and you won, btw. What you said was right .. the exact same thing in which was contested, was then the same thing that was expressed = contridiction, and you thoroughly proved that. I thought about chiming in, but, you had it under control.

Happy Early Birthday 🙂

"However, if they know you are special to them they will fight for you. Not give up. I have had two do this for me. One still."

I disagree with this attitude, QS .. and is the exact thing in which I'm defying against with women. To have ex-men sitting in the balance, attempting to win you over because you have made him realize how special you are, all the while rejecting him, while allowing him to continue to chase you .. is playing a head-game for attention. It's an emotional manipulation to keep them interested, while pushing them away, so that you can feel special about yourself.

Think about that .. if that's what a woman needs to feel special (playing a game) .. then that means she isn't special to him, and so needs this game to make him think she is. A special woman to a man is so, without any proving or convincing by attempting to keep his interest in her.

Michele .. you're not ready to move on. People keep telling you that but they would be wrong, from my perspective. If you trick yourself into believing that you're over him and to just move on when you're not over him and you're not ready .. then you fall prey to re-bound, only to crash and burn with the first man who shows you attention. People do this all the time .. and crash everytime. You can't force your heart to turn cold and forget about him by seeking the attentions of other men .. the only thing you'll accomplish is fooling yourself, as well as, using this other man by making him think he's special to you.

You have to deal with these feelings for Matt, before you can even think about dating again. If you don't, you will carry this emotional baggage onto another person and cause them the same pain you are experiencing right now.

To be honest with you .. I don't think it's over between you and Matt. A man doesn't treat a woman the way he did before the falling out, if he doesn't love her .. and he loves you, Michele. His actions before the whole "rude" episode went down proved this.

People would tell you to just act like you've moved on and do your own thing, and soon you'll have him running back to you .. and that's fucked up .. that's playing hard-to-get.

Hope is not lost with him, but, to get him back you have to change your attitude ... you can't believe you are above him and he is to cater to your feelings, anymore than he is to believe that you should cater to him sexually. Men defy against emotionally needy women, just as women defy against men who are chauvanists.

I agree with Red .. you need to address how you feel with him. Just pulling away and waiting for him to contact you, will only make you more resentful as each day passes. If he came to you today, you would probably freak-out with anguish because you are so upset .. and in so doing, would accomplish nothing.

But, if you resided yourself to have a heart-to-heart talk with him that wasn't revolved around pain and sorrow, torment and fault .. then you would at least get some closure if he still said he didn't want to be with you ..... and that would give you what you need to move-on.

Ignoring this isn't the right answer .. just sitting back and waiting for him to decide whether he wants you or not. The answer is to address the issue.

is this chick Taurus or not?

I have other things to say, but it's imperative i know if she's Taurus. 😛

sorry, us bulls get bored and impatient quickly. 😛

ok, i am gonna put down the wine now and type something up....stayed tuned ladies!

sorry, didn't read it anywhere in this post. i don't memorize people's signs.

Michelle, everyone is giving you wonderful advice. After 4 years, I do not understand his behavior. But I also don't understand why you'd manipulate the situation by placing a guilt trip on him. I learned early on that that is the quickest way to lose trust with a man. If he texted you several times to take care, then after maybe the third time, you should have heeded that and broken ties...look what he's done - you were his yoyo.

I know it hurts because we as Bulls from what I've been told are attached to the ones we love and have a hard time letting go. We tend to want things the way we want it and we dwell. It takes friends, family, and even DXP'ers to help us realize that the grass was not greener within our situation.

You changing your number was probably the last straw with him because that was an abrupt and childish thing to do. You changed your number because you didn't want him to call? Wasn't he already not calling you? When you changed your number, you had to give your new number to all your friends and family. Did any of them ask you why you changed the number? Did you tell the truth or were you too ashamed to give them the real reason for changing it? I could see changing your number if he was stalking you and calling you excessively but not for him not calling you. To me, that is you manipulating the situation yet again and using reverse psychology.

What's up with the text messaging? That is so impersonal, especially for a couple who's been dating for 4 years. At this point, you should not hide behind a phone to express your feelings. If you want closure, you need to contact him. But if you are going to cry over him because of non-closure, you are only hurting yourself not him (because men are not mind readers).

Because you changed your phone number, if you want closure, you have to make the move. Be prepared for him to either accept the invitation to talk this out or for him to ignore your plight because of how it was handled.

Best of luck.

"Im hoping he'll realise hes made a mistake and come back. Do libras do that from your experience. I promise i wont go after him. He hurt me so much i couldnt do it if i tried.
When your libra finished with you at first how long did he take to come back?"

I agree with you HP .. and I think most of the problems women have has to do with experience. Without enough experience, there's no way to put it into proper perspective.

The above quote is inferring that there's no way she would go after him, to chase him .. and this is something that gets pounded into young womens heads these days by other young and inexperienced women who don't know any better. For some reason, it is believed that to approach a man directly, and honestly with how you feel is wrong, and not being empowered in womanhood .. that a woman with pride and dignity won't chase after a man.

And it's all a matter of perspective .. to NOT approach a man with how you truly and honestly feel, while sitting back and awaiting his decision as to whether you are worthy enough for him to talk about feelings on his terms is actually being disrespectful to yourself and NOT being empowered by your womanhood. I don't get that.

I won't go after him .... how long do I have to wait for him to come back.

Think about that for what it means ..... it is in essence saying that it's all left up to the man, on his terms, completely his decision as to whether a woman is worth his time and effort .. and she sits in the balance awaiting his decision to be bestowed upon her, so she can feel worthy in her womanhood as being special to him.

And this is being respectful to the self?

I'm really unclear why this gets preached to young women ... being disrepectful to yourself IS awaiting on his decision. Being an empowered woman, who respects herself, and has pride .... goes straight to the man on her terms, with confidence and resolve and lays the cards on the table .... she is in control of her life, and a man's treatment of her .... this real woman doesn't sit back and worry and wait, and cry about how long she has to endure it before he decides to come to her.

That's not chasing a man, that's having control of your life, that's being respectful to yourself and facing the Bull. Being weak is NOT approaching the man on your terms ... being weak and not in control of your life, is ignoring the man and leaving it up to him as to whether you are suppose to feel special as a woman.

Ok, I'm starting to get it now .... the use of the word "realize" spelled, "realise" speaks volumes.

((he'll realise hes made a mistake and come back. Do libras do that from your experience.))

Ohh yea... we do it when we figure out we just gave up some good sex for the sake of psychological comfort. We switch to the dark side instantly and go back and see if we can mend the situation. Some wise ones figure that out without even walking away from a relationship.

lol .. when all else fails .. suck up to the ex for a lay.

You're so fucking male 🙂

fucking male = oxymoron

Hey everyone.

HP - I think youve got my ex of 4 years (scorpio) and Matt (libra) confused.
Sorry its me im useless at writing lol.
I honestly changed my number because of my scorpio ex not Matt.

P A - Im so happy that you feel he loved me. I felt that he did. By the way he
was with me i just didnt handle things right when i cancelled our date.
I know i cant go running after Matt because hes told me to take
care and he said he doesnt know what he wants.

Its just that deep down i want him to realise he wants to be with me and thats why i keep asking do libras come back.

TOJ - Yeah i must get out there and make myself happy instead of moping about Matt making myself unhappy. At the moment i need to be on my own but hopefully in about a month ill start feeling ready to go out and have a good time.

Thank you all so much for your posts its really helping xxx

A L - I played games as such. Cos i was frightend to show how i really felt. I wanted him to come to me so that i could see how he felt about me which would make me in turn more comfortable showing him how i felt. Dunno if you get what im trying to say lol..

It wasnt for attention to make me feel great that he should bow down to me. No way i was just frightened of showing my feelings coming across pushing if he wasnt coming to me. So the whole 4 months he had to make all the moves. Towards the very end i started to show how i felt etc. thats when it went wrong you see when i came to him ie calling him for the first time in 4 months i got scared off by his manner on the phone. that i immediately thought i cant see him that night and tried to cancel the date. I didnt cancel it as such i asked him whether we should leave it as i didnt want to come across stroppy and emotional. Anyway i telephoned him that night so he knew everything was ok i would just prefer to meet another time. I got his voicemail i left a message. Then he rang me back and left me a voice message. I called him back and he didnt call me back. I again got scared and thought to wait for his call back. I missed him so much and thought maybe i should explain myself which i did. But thats when he said he didnt know what he wanted.

xx

"P-Angel, I know that you must realise that is how the Brits spell the word, so are you saying that being British makes her messed up?"


Yeah, Red, I realiZe that the English spell that way, and that was why I said what I did and then stopped posting. She's English, that makes a world of difference with what I was saying in my last post.

I wouldn't go so far as to say that being from that country makes a person messed up .. for we are all messed up in some way, no matter where were from. However, the culture within the gender differences are not in accordance with Americans ... and my last post about women being empowered doesn't fit within the mind-set of the English.

Though, I'd be willing to wager that the women would like to have such power in thier womanhood, and it is deserved for everybody should have that right ... however, it simply isn't the case over there. Men still have power OVER women .. females reputation is at the mercy of the men. Is a woman is bound to suffering consequences that she will be labelled by a man if she steps over a line that is deemed inappropriate by males. That's not saying it's bad or good .. just different from what I was telling her.

American women are empowered .. we tell men what to do, not the other way around. So, when I was saying, don't sit back and let a man control your life .. take charge, go to him and face him on your terms. While she sits back and was thinking .. I won't go after him because that isn't right. See my point? I understand now, because she is English, why she is waiting on him to decide her fate within the terms of the relationship ... because this is the culture.

So, my words to her can't be applied ... she hasn't the power over a man to do that. When I saw the spelling of that word, I backed-off because I realized I was preaching something she can't do.

***QS, same thing I've been telling her. If a man desires you, he'll do just about anything to get your attention. They'll come find you wherever you are and they'll keep coming back.***

Yes, I know only too well. Especially when trying to walk away from a scorp male. HE will even show up unannounced! And stand outside your patio knocking on your window until you let him in. grrrrrr....

That I effing nuts and psycho.

The bit about the scorp that is

HP....you funny me!

why would any woman want a man that is IGNORING her, that sh*t baffles me to no end.

Agreed .... and what's even more baffling to me is when women play this, thinking they are doing something good.

If a man is ignoring his woman, and she thinks this is rude of him, or mistreatment in some way ....... then her solution to the problem is to ignore him everytime he comes running back, while still making sure she is maintaining his interest in her, so he'll keep running back.

Instead of being a grown-up and just walking away with dignity.

I don't know what has gotten into young women these days .. to do that to a man, is only presenting yourself as being just as much of an ass as he was ... if the man is a jerk, walk the fuck away and do NOT keep his interest so he'll keep running back to you ... to do that is being a Player.

If a man is a tosser .. then toss his fucking ass, hold your head high with pride and respect and walk out of his life while REPELLING him away from you, rather than keeping his attention.

P Angel is that post aimed towards me?

I am trying to walk away with dignity and pride that is my reason not to pursue him any further than i have done. As the last message he said to me was that he didnt know what he wanted, didnt want to be unfair to me and told me to take care.

Unfortunately as i really cared for him and miss him a lot im hoping he may realise in time that he does know what he wants and wants to go back to being with me.

Im not looking to turn him down, if he came back to me. Id be looking to understand his reasons and hopefully have a stronger relationship with him.

I dont think hes an asshole i think i had baggage from another relationship and exagerrated matters and maybe lost him over it. I think he handled the situation not so well. By not telling me it was over immediately instead of not returning my call. But then i didnt get in touch with so maybe he felt he didnt have to.

Also due to him being reluctant to talking it through with me and understanding i may have hurt him or he may not care about me as much as i care about him. I do not know. Only time will tell.

xx

***Unfortunately as i really cared for him and miss him a lot im hoping he may realise in time that he does know what he wants and wants to go back to being with me.***

Why? If he doesn't want to be in a relationship with you, why hold on to false hopes?

***Im not looking to turn him down, if he came back to me. Id be looking to understand his reasons and hopefully have a stronger relationship with him.***

***I dont think hes an marker i think i had baggage from another relationship and exagerrated matters and maybe lost him over it. ***

Who gives a crap about his reason? Move on. The reason right now doesn't matter. He doesn't want it. This isn't about you it is about him! Don't you dare think it is you doing something wrong!

Yes HP the scorp guy is retarded! Anyway he will neva pull that stunt again! Trust! He froze his ass off!