Time de-bag the cat....

It is time to explain why I have not been contributing a lot lately, and when I do it is one sided. I was going to keep this off of the boards out of respect for another....however I feel I can respectfully explain a situation that needs to be explain for me to really interract with me the way I should interract with people I talk to as openly as I do here.

About two months ago Alcheme and I had a bit of a turbulant break up. I fell in love with someone, whom social rule dictates I should not fall in love with. It was a friend, and my boss's at my current job's fiance. The three of us (my boss, is fiance and I) had known each other for the better part of a year before this had all happened, and for about twice as long as Alcheme and I became rather serious.

I was always attracted to this girl, but out of personal and societal rule, kept it as a casual friendship and only spoke and talked to her when the three of us were hanging out. It remained this way, with a preocupation with her before I knew I was going to see her, and a few hours after we all parted ways being the only real bad thing to come out of it. Once I found out that the attraction was mutual, we ended up "comming together". By my direction we dicided this was the most selfish of selfish mistakes and helped each other to tell our respective partners, and mend our own relationships.

The problem lied in the fact that having casually known each other for so long, we both knew, while avoiding talking about it up to this point that we were pretty much perfect for each other. This contributed greately in the next series of events.

To make a long story slightly shorter, we worked dilligently to mend our relationships and develop the love we needed to have to be with our other partners. Both of our partners showed great strength in the way they dealed with this situation. However, we met for cofee one night to try to disect the powerful connection we shared with intention to conquer it, defeating it so that it would be put to rest and we could go on with our lives with our relationships. Somewhere in the course of that, the disecting, the theorizing, the explaining we realized that the mistake wasn't so much the evil thing we did, but rather ignoring and trying to shelve those things that made it happen, as well as the things that made us both want to be with each other so bad we would cross a line that neither of us would have ever crossed otherwise.

The result was ending of our other relationships to be with each other.

We have been together for about two months now. In that time, as well as maintaining a friendship with Alcheme, this girl and I have been experiencing the greatest connection of our lives. One powerful enough to knock down the infamous Libra walls.

She is a Libra as well, which is my reasoning for having such recent insight on Libra women. I love and admire her more than I knew possible, a basic appreciattion, the very definition I have always strived for in love describes our own. Neither of us have experienced a connection quite like this. Astrologically were a great match, which is nice. Actually, were also each others fatal attraction as well.

Me: Libra sun
Libra Moon
Taurus Rising

Her: Libra sun
Leo Moon
Scorpio rising.

If anyone wanted to know.

I am sure I will talk about this new relationship plenty in future posts but the point of this post, other than explaining why I have been impersonal in my posting, choosing rather to simply advise or give my opinion is this:

Us Libras do spend too much time worrying about other people, too much time trying to make someone else happy and ignoring our own happines to the extent that we are actually ironically hurting them more. It isn't about that either....but this....

A Libra knows if they love you before you can even look at your watch to time it. We fall in love almost as fast, we do open up to our lover, we do put them before everyone else including friends and we do let down our walls for the hand that can touch our heart.

Everything that happened in the above, is within the capabilities of every Libra alive. It may not happen in the most iddeal of ways as it did in my situation, but for those of you who have been told libras take time to fall in love, that they don't know for a long time, that they don't like to open up, that they will always have walls.....what should be said is that they will always act this way until someone walks into their life and makes them fall in love, let down their walls, open up and decisively state so without but a moment passing.

This is the truth of the most basic nature of the Libra. Don't dump your partner based on this, if they have not oppened up or have not fallen in love, we can with time....but...there will always be that one person out there and we know it. We won't understand this until it happens. Even then we won't feel we need to.

"oh my god, where is alcheme? i need to speak with her. she must be burning up inside. i'd reach across this screen and wallop you one if i could. on her behalf."

I just spoke with her on messenger, I wanted her to know I was posting that message and that she was ok with it.

She is at home studying for a big job interview. Right as and after all of this there was a lot of bitterness and anger but we have since turned a relationship into a friendship.

I understand your wanting to smack me on her behalf, I truely do....but given the situation I would if I had to do all of this all over again.

The most important thing for me to convey was that I did this because I saw the potential for love, not a piece of ass or the fulfillment of any sexual fantasy. Alcheme and I, through all of this, grew a lot and gained a new level of understanding of ourselves. After the emotion passed, we have been able to realize and even appreciate that result.

"The boss' fiancee, you say?


Yikes. Good luck with that."

There were some tense moments there. He made some interresting threats on my life, however those have since stopped and I have recieved a new position in the company where we don't work together nor does he have authority over me.

Nic, you are very brave for posting the TRUTH....sometimes that's the way life goes. You have always inspired me with your advice and alas, mine didnt end up the way I'd have liked either but thank you and good for you for the posts you just put up. Now you can keep advising us LOL...nah, Im kidding, I give up on my Libra - I am just here because you have all become my online friends who have been just wonderful.

*hugs to Alcheme too* and a big CONGRATULATIONS Nic for finding happiness 🙂

Lets hope all the other LIbrans out there can do the same

Nic, I admire you for posting that and in such detail. I never thought you would, didn't personally think it was necessary for you to express it in that much depth. However, I can appreciate it greatly and applaud you for it.

We sometimes can't help how things happen, we can only live life as it comes and learn from its experiences.

I know Alcheme is okay... She is handling it better than I think I could have and at such an early stage. I wish everyone peace and love. Those are two elements that are so crucial in life.

Its actually quite interesting to see such an honest post to be honest, given that I have gone to all the horoscope sites over the past few days and read all my friends, my own and of course my Libra friends, and it appears that LIbrans have this compelling need to express the truth right about now.....

Interesting to say the least but again, Im glad everybody is ok with everything 🙂

"You don't think the fact that this woman abruptly left her fiancee for you says something about her level of commitment (or lack thereof)?"

I don't and here is why.

She was unhappy and not in love with her fiance for a very long time before this happened. However she felt commited to him, commited to their relationship and put forth great effort to the point of self denial and sacraficing her own happiness in the mean time to try to find happiness and love with him. At the point we came together, she had already in her mind decided it was not going to work, like all libras, she was in the middle of the final contemplation and weighing when what happened between us did.

It was a mix of equal parts having already left and moved on in her heart and mind with the final step being the actual break up, and the kind of atraction and connection we had towards each other that factored in acting the way she did. She did not feel good about how it happened, however like me does not regret that it happened. Both of us are very high on the self control ladder, but factors I already mentioned and the level of attraction and desire we had for each other was far, far greater.

When it first happened, it was not a giving in in spite of what we were doing wrong, it was a giving in regardless of what we were doing wrong if that makes any sense?

In short, given she left him the way she did for me, I do not have any fear in the conviction of her commitment and feeling for me. r

Thanks for the love, everyone. I have been taking a break from the forums for a little recharge period, but am doing well. Nic and I have had a few bumps along the way, which I suppose can be considered par for the course when you are cheated on not once but three times and had to hear that your boyfriend left you for another woman the day after his new girlfriend moved in with him from her ex. But, while it has taken a while, we are getting there...

I am doing well. I have been very busy. I am still planning on moving to Phoenix, as I have made quite a few friends there and have come to find that I really enjoy the place. I have a major job interview for a position in Phoenix on Friday that I have been seriously prepping for.

I spent the weekend before last in Phoenix celebrating a good friend's birthday and happened to meet someone. We really hit it off and just clicked. I wasn't exactly looking, but it seems these things just happen. He is a Cancer. But, before QS beats me, his sun exactly trines my sun, his Libra moon trines my Gem moon, and we have the exact same Ascendant. LOL! He is definitely not your standard Cancer. I think that one of the things I like best is that his eyes smile, not like most people's, but truly smile. It reminds me of the smile that I feel in my heart.

Anyway, things seem to be going really well for both of us, and for that I am happy. All things considered, I have come to the realization that it is better for both of us this way, giving us both the opportunity to find what we are truly looking for out of life.

Sorry that I have not been on the forum lately. I needed a break and to take care of some things. I will probably not be around much until after the weekend. My interview is Friday and a Virgo friend's birthday is this weekend and we plan on partying the weekend away. Depending on how my interview goes, I may not have the chance to get back on a lot until I get settled. I will try to keep everyone posted, though, if that happens.

Thanks again for the good thoughts! I hope to get a chance to get back on more soon (but not too soon, I really hope this interview goes well)...

Good for you nic. am happy for you. My old crush libra girl finally ditched her virgo boy and met another libra guy and both are way happy together... Its always heartwarming to know that 2 libras are together. Goodluck...

Nic, I commend you for saying what happened. You do give good advice 99% of the time and I'm glad you were honest with Alcheme. Sometimes it's hard to express things, but you did well and I'm sure most of us won't hold this against you. Sometimes (a lot of times for me) our hearts speak louder than our heads.

Alcheme, I'm so happy that you're fine with everything and that you're seemingly moving along, too. GOOD LUCK WITH THE INTERVIEW in Phoenix! I talked to QS on the phone a few days ago and she said your voice and mine sound almost identical....must be the Texas thing!

Take care and best of luck in both of your new endeavors and relationships.

Yeah. I kinda figured this out awhile ago. Hence my "hope your okay" post to Nic awhile back. I knew before that but wasn't sure how to be supportive without encroaching on your mutual privacy especially since no one told me and I just kind of figured it out.

To be honest, I think you will both be happier. I really didn't see the situation working out. From what I saw, I didn't think you were compatible romantically.

You are both great people. I am glad you are able to end on good terms and both have exciting new prospects on the horizon.

Alcheme you are such a pretty, compassionate, person. Without doubt you will find a loyal partner worthy of your warmth and goodness. What was your past does not have to be your future. I wish you much joy and love. May your future be filled with these blessings.

Who wants to be with a flippin' Libra anyway, unless you're an air sign...

The rest is barking mad.

Alch, good to have you back. We've missed you, dahlin'.

Thanks for letting me tell the story without comming down to hard. It is one of those things that I wish happened differently but I had to do it.

I had a feeling you could tell LS. You could always PM me you know if you want to ask or talk about something.

You can just refer to me as the Sparrow of All Knowing. HA H AHA HA

Thanks for the offer. Right now everything is okey dokey.

BTW Nic sometimes shit just happens. That is life. As my ex would say, the heart wants what the heart wants.

Just remember us little libra ladies have a little wild streak. And we know way more than we usually let on. It is just polite. 😉

Like I said..Find love in the real life people....

so true Archer. so true...

Good luck to both of you and props to handling a difficult situation in a mature way! You can't help who you fall in love with, but you can be honest with one another and let that person find the perfect person for themselves as well. Respect to Alcheme for being open enough to be ok with the post! Good luck to Nic as well in his new relationship!

Good luck again Alcheme on the interview!!! Have fun tonight!!! Tell me about it tomorrow. Cancer.... Ugggghhhh... Nah, seriously, if he makes you happy it makes me happy.

Good luck Alcheme.

QS, I'm talking to him right now....ugh.

* Find love in the real life people....

I whole-heartedly agree with this.

* even this thread seems fiction, too good to be true.. all is well, all is perfect.. even the breakups are perfection ...

* haha,, libras are amazingingly unbelievable..

I am sure it was hard for everyone involved. Would you rather they had a big blow up dragging everyone into their drama? I wouldn't.

I think they handled a very difficult situation very well.

Sorry Archer. I must have misunderstood you. Damn computers and the lack of intonation!

🙂