SRS Topic is SRS: Spanking (Page 2)

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westside
@westside
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Posted by aquaj
Posted by aPiscesPrincess
Posted by MsPisces.
If you resent your parents as an adult for beatings you've gotten as a child, its safe to say you were border line, if not fully abused.


Those of us who weren't abused, yet physically disciplined, don't resent our parents.



+1




-1. As I said before, my father was not immoderate in spanking. And we have a very close relationship today. I like the armchair psychology though😄 It's amusing. lulz.
click to expand





i dont think you're familiar with the rules here. you cannot simply subtract someones +1.


like wtf
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westside
@westside
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Posted by DazedScorp
Posted by aquaj


Perhaps, but given the room for interpretation when child services gets involved, why not just find other ways to discipline your children? It is this fundamental lack of creativity on the part of these parents that makes it not hard for me to understand why there IS such a strong correlation between low social status of the parent and their tendency to spank.



I thought we were talking about spanking your child...

Not beating the bloddy shit out of them?
click to expand




woa calm it down dude, you're making too much sense
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Lobo
@Lobo
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oh aqua aqua aqua...😄
good thread and flow.. Candeh

Maybe you want to try a new tradition and approach with your own kids Candeh? Nothing wrong with it.

Spanking works for some and not for others.. meh..... I've seen small children cuss their parents out and hit them in the store. And the parent was trying to make a deal and talk softly to them.. Yeah those types need an ass beating.

The child that you can give a look or a certain tone to, and the obey don't.



Ranges people ranges.. There is no one size fits all parenting style jeez......
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Lobo
@Lobo
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Posted by DazedScorp
Posted by aquaj


That's just the think. Since spanking is illegal in many places (and the severity of the laws varies by state) the smart and not lazy thing to do would be to just find another way to discipline your kids.


I'm sure rubbing their collective brain cells together, today's socioeconomically disadvantaged parents can think of SOME other way to rear their children😄



Sure...

Have them take away their childs gameboy or car...

Oops, I mean dominos and dirt.




blockquote>Posted by MzSagittarius
Posted by MzSagittarius
I received a few spankings growing up. Not a lot. My brother and sister (older than me) they got A LOT! My mom said that I was different from them. In order to get her message across, she had to spank them. With me, she could simply talk it out. (God bless my Moon conjunct Mercury)

I think that all children are different. Just because ONE child 'needs to get they ass beat', another may need the evil look, or threats, or simple discussion.

I don't wanna raise my kids on spanking, but if the shoe fits...



Sorry Lobo, beat ya to it.
click to expand






@ MZSAg "rolls eyes
@ Dazed ha.

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Candeh15
@Candeh15
15 Years1,000+ PostsVirgo

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Posted by MzSagittarius
There is SO much reiteration in this thread. Go back and check the last few pages, I've already mentioned "breaking the cycle" and the "thin line between a spanking and beatings"...



I don't know if this was directed at me or not, but this thread is moving so fast and at five different directions. I am on my phone and overseas, so I can't check it that often.
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Lobo
@Lobo
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Posted by MzSagittarius
Posted by Candeh15
Posted by MzSagittarius
There is SO much reiteration in this thread. Go back and check the last few pages, I've already mentioned "breaking the cycle" and the "thin line between a spanking and beatings"...



I don't know if this was directed at me or not, but this thread is moving so fast and at five different directions. I am on my phone and overseas, so I can't check it that often.



No... not you... its at everyone receiving praise for ideas that have been stated already...

*cough *cough...

LOBO!! You took EXACTLY what I said and restated it!
click to expand





Sags.... Lord give me the strength..... I'm sorry MZsag my bad.. Now drop it😄
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ReallyNiceAriesPerson
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Posted by MzSagittarius
Posted by aquaj
Posted by DazedScorp
Posted by aquaj
All I have to say in conclusion is: "There are ways to discipline children effectively that do not involve hitting them and that can actually lower their risk for being more aggressive," said lead author Catherine Taylor of the Tulane University School of Public Health."


...I concur.



So....

What are the alternatives?




Well, I'm not saying it's the ONLY solution, but you do know why people who have life sentences in prison get access to newspapers and TV, right? It's because it's not the lack of luxury and conveniences that penalizes them and that goes against their fundamental nature as humans, it's the lack of freedom. If I had a kid who needed discipline, I would probably schedule him/her stricter than The Duggars and lock him/her inside that house for a month.



I'll take a spanking for 500.
click to expand




You would😉

I will see your spanking and raise you a set of fluffy handcuffs.
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Lobo
@Lobo
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And our penal system does not reform prisioners, it hardens them and teaches them the trick of the trade.

And those who are unlucky enough to be placed in Administrative Segregation, lose their minds from months, years, and decades of solitude.

Please don't even bring our Prision system in to this because that is completely different from disciplining your children.



Truth.... used to be a boss man.. I was a Seg boss....
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ReallyNiceAriesPerson
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Posted by MzSagittarius
Posted by ReallyNiceAriesPerson
Posted by MzSagittarius
Posted by aquaj
Posted by DazedScorp
Posted by aquaj
All I have to say in conclusion is: "There are ways to discipline children effectively that do not involve hitting them and that can actually lower their risk for being more aggressive," said lead author Catherine Taylor of the Tulane University School of Public Health."


...I concur.



So....


I'll take a spanking for 500.



You would😉

I will see your spanking and raise you a set of fluffy handcuffs.



(Only a ReallyNiceAriesPerson confuses Jeporady with fuckin Poker 😛)

Fuck, I fold. Got Dammit, bring the lube.
click to expand





Well for a minute I thought it might have been Trivial Punishments, but I guess we could turn it into a game show:

Spankings for 500

then.. The Rack for 1000

or .......Water Board for 5000
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MsPisces.
@MsPisces.
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Posted by aquaj
Posted by aPiscesPrincess
Posted by MsPisces.
If you resent your parents as an adult for beatings you've gotten as a child, its safe to say you were border line, if not fully abused.


Those of us who weren't abused, yet physically disciplined, don't resent our parents.



+1




-1. As I said before, my father was not immoderate in spanking. And we have a very close relationship today. I like the armchair psychology though😄 It's amusing. lulz.
click to expand




And yet you still wont aknowledge the part your mother played...
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MsPisces.
@MsPisces.
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Posted by aquaj
Posted by DazedScorp
Posted by aquaj
All I have to say in conclusion is: "There are ways to discipline children effectively that do not involve hitting them and that can actually lower their risk for being more aggressive," said lead author Catherine Taylor of the Tulane University School of Public Health."


...I concur.



So....

What are the alternatives?




Well, I'm not saying it's the ONLY solution, but you do know why people who have life sentences in prison get access to newspapers and TV, right? It's because it's not the lack of luxury and conveniences that penalizes them and that goes against their fundamental nature as humans, it's the lack of freedom. If I had a kid who needed discipline, I would probably schedule him/her stricter than The Duggars and lock him/her inside that house for a month.
click to expand





Umm...thats your solution, and you deem parents who spank their children idiotic?? lol


Thanks for provng my point! You non speakers have just as little a clue as spankers do!


Its called....setting examples and rules, enforcing said examples and rules, setting consequences for rules that aren't followed .....with consistency. You'll rarely have to spank your child if you do.
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MsPisces.
@MsPisces.
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Comments: 9 · Posts: 4248 · Topics: 32
Posted by MzSagittarius
Posted by MsPisces.
Posted by aquaj
Posted by DazedScorp
Posted by aquaj
All I have to say in conclusion is: "There are ways to discipline children effectively that do not involve hitting them and that can actually lower their risk for being more aggressive," said lead author Catherine Taylor of the Tulane University School of Public Health."


...I concur.



So....

What are the alternatives?




Well, I'm not saying it's the ONLY solution, but you do know why people who have life sentences in prison get access to newspapers and TV, right? It's because it's not the lack of luxury and conveniences that penalizes them and that goes against their fundamental nature as humans, it's the lack of freedom. If I had a kid who needed discipline, I would probably schedule him/her stricter than The Duggars and lock him/her inside that house for a month.




Umm...thats your solution, and you deem parents who spank their children idiotic?? lol


Thanks for provng my point! You non speakers have just as little a clue as spankers do!


Its called....setting examples and rules, enforcing said examples and rules, setting consequences for rules that aren't followed .....with consistency. You'll rarely have to spank your child if you do.





There are other alternatives, but either way, whatever you do, as long as its consistent and not abusive...
I really don't see the negativity in spanking you child. Like really.
click to expand


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XXMR2NICEXX
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To answer your q? I firmly believe that parents should not spank their children. I wish that every country would follow the examples of Austria, Finland, Germany and Sweden in making it illegal to use corporal punishment at home or in schools.

If parents are not going to spank their children when their children are big and strong enough to physically overpower their parents, it seems to me that choosing to spank them when they are small is somewhat thoughtless, and perhaps even cowardly. I believe that every human being can be thoughtless and cowardly at times, so I am not condemning people who spank their children. I am condemning the act of hitting another human being.

If parents choose to spank their children, I can only hope that they do so with broken hearts rather than out of anger. To discipline out of anger makes the discipline more about the parent's lack of emotional control rather than about teaching their children how to mature into well functioning adults.

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westside
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Posted by XXMR2NICEXX
To answer your q? I firmly believe that parents should not spank their children. I wish that every country would follow the examples of Austria, Finland, Germany and Sweden in making it illegal to use corporal punishment at home or in schools.

If parents are not going to spank their children when their children are big and strong enough to physically overpower their parents, it seems to me that choosing to spank them when they are small is somewhat thoughtless, and perhaps even cowardly. I believe that every human being can be thoughtless and cowardly at times, so I am not condemning people who spank their children. I am condemning the act of hitting another human being.

If parents choose to spank their children, I can only hope that they do so with broken hearts rather than out of anger. To discipline out of anger makes the discipline more about the parent's lack of emotional control rather than about teaching their children how to mature into well functioning adults.



see now this is a very well thought out, genuine, reasonable, OPINION. take notes aquaj
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Candeh15
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Posted by LoveBucket
@OP, Girl, you are worrying yourself to death over something that won't even happen -- your mother spanking her grandchild -- trust me when I tell you -- it's not going to happen.

The relationship between a parent and child is very much different between that of a grandparent and grandchild. There are many a parents who spanked the shit out of their kids because, as you said, that is what they learned and they turned out great. HOWEVER, that buck STOPS with the grandchildren. It's just different with the grands. So, do yourself a favor if you can -- STOP WORRYING because the day that your mom lays a spanking on your nephew will never come to pass.

My mother (Virgo) was a yeller and a spanker, scratch that -- a yeller and a beater, but she did it because she's either very mean or very nice -- not much of an in between. She has never so much as even raised her voice at any of her grandchildren, one of which she had a huge hand in helping to raise. Always soft spoken with them, always listening, nurturing, caring.

You done got the daughter-in-law all rouved up over something that will never happen -- she should in no way be talking about what will happen if your mother hits her child and that's b/c it just ain't gonna happen. She only went there because you transferred your energies of worry and fear upon her.

Not only is that baby safe with his grandma, but even if she were to keep him for a week with your brother and sister-in-law out of town or on vacation or something, that boy will have the time of his life, simply because grandmothers naturally have so much love to give to their grands. Even if the grandmother is not loving and perhaps even mean as the devil, still, they are equipped with grandmotherly love that, once or if they become a grandmother, the love is there to give, even though some people believe love does not exist. It's the grandmothers in the world who prove that love does not exist stuff WRONG. 🙂



I mentioned it befire but I cone from a family where other relatives openly spanked someone's child. It has even been joked about among family membrrs. My grandmother spanked me. so in this case, it does happen.
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Candeh15
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My grandmother soanked me, my brother, my cousin, and others. My mother was ok with it. So, I know she's capable of it, because that's just how things were.

I am really not as.worried as you make me sound like I am. My brother and I know what's up.

Your points are valid, bit I wanted to know anyway because my sister.in law is a hot headed leo, and she will speak her mind in a heartbeat.
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Candeh15
@Candeh15
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Posted by westside
Posted by XXMR2NICEXX
To answer your q? I firmly believe that parents should not spank their children. I wish that every country would follow the examples of Austria, Finland, Germany and Sweden in making it illegal to use corporal punishment at home or in schools.

If parents are not going to spank their children when their children are big and strong enough to physically overpower their parents, it seems to me that choosing to spank them when they are small is somewhat thoughtless, and perhaps even cowardly. I believe that every human being can be thoughtless and cowardly at times, so I am not condemning people who spank their children. I am condemning the act of hitting another human being.



If parents choose to spank their children, I can only hope that they do so with broken hearts rather than out of anger. To discipline out of anger makes the discipline more about the parent's lack of emotional control rather than about teaching their children how to mature into well functioning adults.



see now this is a very well thought out, genuine, reasonable, OPINION. take notes aquaj
click to expand




I agree with Elle. This was a nicely stated opinion. I did not intend for things to get so heated, but I shoud have expected it.
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Candeh15
@Candeh15
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Comments: 5 · Posts: 4244 · Topics: 258
Posted by LoveBucket
@OP, Girl, you are worrying yourself to death over something that won't even happen -- your mother spanking her grandchild -- trust me when I tell you -- it's not going to happen.

The relationship between a parent and child is very much different between that of a grandparent and grandchild. There are many a parents who spanked the shit out of their kids because, as you said, that is what they learned and they turned out great. HOWEVER, that buck STOPS with the grandchildren. It's just different with the grands. So, do yourself a favor if you can -- STOP WORRYING because the day that your mom lays a spanking on your nephew will never come to pass.

My mother (Virgo) was a yeller and a spanker, scratch that -- a yeller and a beater, but she did it because she's either very mean or very nice -- not much of an in between. She has never so much as even raised her voice at any of her grandchildren, one of which she had a huge hand in helping to raise. Always soft spoken with them, always listening, nurturing, caring.

You done got the daughter-in-law all rouved up over something that will never happen -- she should in no way be talking about what will happen if your mother hits her child and that's b/c it just ain't gonna happen. She only went there because you transferred your energies of worry and fear upon her.

Not only is that baby safe with his grandma, but even if she were to keep him for a week with your brother and sister-in-law out of town or on vacation or something, that boy will have the time of his life, simply because grandmothers naturally have so much love to give to their grands. Even if the grandmother is not loving and perhaps even mean as the devil, still, they are equipped with grandmotherly love that, once or if they become a grandmother, the love is there to give, even though some people believe love does not exist. It's the grandmothers in the world who prove that love does not exist stuff WRONG. 🙂



Sigh. She brought up the issue and told.me EVERYTHING about how she felt about it with my brother and my mother. We're both pretty close, and she's very passionate about a lot.of things. She had her opinion, and.when I mentioned it,.she said " Yes, I have already thought of that." Especially since she knows how.things went with my brother and I. But I won't really get into it.
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Candeh15
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But, I understand where you are.coming from lovebucket. I honestly just wanted some thoughts on this, but I can walk away from the issue now. I brought this up because yhat night a lot of things were revealed between myself, my mother, and my sister, and I needed to.get all of the thoughts out of my head. Will.I even confront my mother? Probably not. That is left for my brother to do ( and she already told him.he should) and if the situation arises.