Traditional beadwinner

Okay, so I know the man is the traditional breadwinner of the family. This has caused a huge issue in my life in the past couple of years. I am a mom. I am a wife. I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders as the breadwinner. I work full time and am very rarely available for family things. I put the kids first. My hubby puts me first and brings in very little. He does almost nothing for the household chores. Am I wrong in being unhappy with this arrangement? Should I just support him, the kids, do the chores, etc without complaint? Or am I justified in unhappiness?

Lol. He's a Leo. Virgo rising and moon. I'm a sag. Gem moon.

I'm sorry. Virgo rising and Venus for him. He has cancer moon.

You say your hubs puts you first but "brings in very little."

That's a bit contradictory... the way it's set up translates to

'If he cared, he would bring in more money.'

I'm confused. :/

Where's your Mars and Venus?

Posted by Montgomery
You say your hubs puts you first but "brings in very little."

That's a bit contradictory... the way it's set up translates to

'If he cared, he would bring in more money.'

I'm confused. :/

That makes two of us. Please elaborate, OP?

Many moons ago I had a lad I quite liked - we were sort of in the same situation...

I mean he moved in, and he'd maybe move from the bed to the couch each day, smoke all my bud, use all the hot water- no job no car no house work.

I worked a 70hour week not including commute and all my shidt was belong to mines.

I put myself in that situation consciously for my own reasons- ie sex and company, til I grew bored.

I didn't expect or ask him to change:

Solution- kicked him out.

Problem solved -onward and upward.

BUT I wasn't a momma and we weren't married, so your situation is obviously very tough but I don't think a man is completely to blame in these types of scenarios...

My mars is cap my Venus is sag

"Puts me first" translates to he tries to spend all of his time with me, as opposed to the kids. truly I guess he actually spends most of said time with me lately more on his phone.

"Brings in very little" translates to I work 50hrs/wk and drive 10. He works approx 12 hours/week and it's just to get out of the house. He brings home about $ 100/week, but spends it on supporting his habits.

He's on his phone a lot, attempting to sell...starting a business. When I try to talk to him about it, he gets upset. DESPERATELY upset. It turns into a knock down drag out til 6 am and I end up feeling like the bad guy.

Are they his children?

We've been together for a very long time. I believed in him. I've tried to keep my faith. I know he loves me. Loves me like no one else ever could or ever have. Nowadays though, I just need... more. And I feel bad for feeling that way. I worked hard to get where I am. I thought he was working hard too. But now, I'm at a point where if I were to leave, he'd get everything. We all know some women do this to men where they have a family and divorce and then get $ $ each month. That's where I am, just from the other side of the fence.

Yes, his kids.

I've always defended him. I feel like I should protect him. But I am growing tired of this. I'm tired of not being happy. And just needed some intelligent ladies to talk de sense into me.

Everytime I feel this way, I turn around and feel so bad for it. I should really get a grip, I guess.

Posted by Rommy
Yeah traditional "bead" winners are hard to come by. If only he knew how to tie an award winning knot —!

Yeah, sorry. I may have had a drink or two. That's what it takes for me to open up. Even anonymously.

Why are you allowing this?