Your Sign is a Joke

Astrological Signs Like You have Never Seen them
I think this was written by a scorp.

source: http://www.jokes2go.com/lists/list6.html

Lol the Sag one is true

Lmao @ "armpits of the zodiac" for Pisces.

Very good.

*Very good btw as in the post not the armpits of the zodiac comment lol.

Capricorn

several wrong things there
One we get even. We do it in a way where we are never charged with the crime but we get even.

and its is on the small ten inch size between 10 and 14 on most of us. More than she could use anyway.

😄 "a Scorpio date usually ends in rape"

there have Neva been any charges filed *shrugs*

Posted by hardcandy
😄 "a Scorpio date usually ends in rape"

there have Neva been any charges filed *shrugs*

HA!!

Most Attractive: Gemini Rising, Leo Rising (or Cancer/Leo cusp Rising)
Smartest: Gemini, Aquarius
Wisest: Libra, Pisces
Funniest: Mercury in Sagittarius or Mercury in Aries
Most Likely to Secretly Crush on Me: Taurus, Virgo, Pisces, Scorpio
Most Likely to Be My Secret Crush: Gemini*, Libra
Most Likely to Be a Mutual Crush: Aquarius
Best Flirt: Libra, Gemini, Pisces, Leo
Worst Flirt: Cancer, Virgo, Capricorn
Best Kisser: Scorpio
Worst Kisser: Aries
Most Stalkerific: Virgo, Mars in Leo, Venus in Scorpio
Most Likable Stalker: Scorpio, Pisces
Least Likable Stalker: Venus or Mars in Aries, Mars in Leo (will not go away without a restraining order!)
Least Likely to Be My Date: Capricorn, Sagittarius, Virgo
Most Likely to Be My Date: Every other sign, Gemini rising
Best Lover: Pisces, Scorpioooooooo, Venus or Mars in Libra, Mars in Pisces
Worst Lover: Venus or Mars in Aries, Mars in Leo
Freakiest Lover: Sun/Venus/Mars in Aquarius (—no?? or —shouldn't?? isn't in their vocabulary)
Best Pillow-Talk: Sun or Mercury in Pisces
Best Break-Up: Cancer, Scorpio
Worst Break-Up: Any personal planet in Aries (especially Sun/Venus/Mars), Moon in Leo
Most Likely to Become Mayor of Friend Zone: Virgo, Sagittarius, Venus in Cancer
Best Ex in Friend Zone: Aries
Best Childhood BFF: Capricorn, Taurus, Sagittarius
Worst Childhood BFF: Capricorn, Saturn in Cancer
Best Adult BFF: Virgo, Moon in Pisces/Scorpio/Capricorn, Moon aspecting Uranus, Jupiter in Cancer
Worst Adult BFF: Aries, Moon in Leo
Best Communication: Mercury in Aries/Leo/Sagittarius/Libra/Scorpio/Cancer
Worst Communication: Mercury in Pisces/Gemini/Aquarius
Best Heart-to-Hearts: Cancer, Moon in Scorpio, Moon in Pisces
Worst Heart-to-Hearts: Moon in Capricorn
Best Co-Worker/Teammate: Taurus, Virgo, Cancer, Sagittarius, Capricorn
Worst Co-Worker: Taurus, Gemini, Capricorn (backstabber alert!)

Best Boss: Taurus, Scorpio, Leo
Worst Boss: Gemini, Virgo
Placements or Aspects Most Likely to Repeat in Relatives: Pisces everywhere (especially Moon in Pisces), Sun or Venus in Cancer, personal planets in Gemini or Leo, Sun-Mercury, Moon-Venus
Placements or Aspects Most Likely to Repeat in Lovers/Dates: Venus or Mars in Aries, Mars in Leo, Moon-Neptune, Moon-Saturn, Venus-Mars, Venus-Neptune, Venus-Pluto, personal planet-Saturn, strongly Uranian/Aquarian, Sun in 11th house, eastern hemisphere cluster (southeast and northeast), Pisces or Neptune is strongly represented in their love/sex profile
Placements Aspects Most Likely to Repeat in Friends: Sun in fire or air sign, Mercury in fire sign, Moon-Uranus, personal planets in Leo, Jupiter in Cancer

Source: http://randomastrology.tumblr.com/post/568769214/my-astro-superlatives

Most Attractive: Gemini Rising, Leo Rising (or Cancer/Leo cusp Rising)

Freakiest Lover: Sun/Venus/Mars in Aquarius

Best Lover: Pisces, Scorpioooooooo, Venus or Mars in Libra, Mars in Pisces

Best Flirt: Libra, Gemini, Pisces, Leo

damn..im the muthafukkin man according to this crap,lol

Posted by caligula
Most Attractive: Gemini Rising, Leo Rising (or Cancer/Leo cusp Rising)
Smartest: Gemini, Aquarius
Wisest: Libra, Pisces
Funniest: Mercury in Sagittarius or Mercury in Aries
Most Likely to Secretly Crush on Me: Taurus, Virgo, Pisces, Scorpio
Most Likely to Be My Secret Crush: Gemini*, Libra
Most Likely to Be a Mutual Crush: Aquarius
Best Flirt: Libra, Gemini, Pisces, Leo
Worst Flirt: Cancer, Virgo, Capricorn
Best Kisser: Scorpio
Worst Kisser: Aries
Most Stalkerific: Virgo, Mars in Leo, Venus in Scorpio
Most Likable Stalker: Scorpio, Pisces
Least Likable Stalker: Venus or Mars in Aries, Mars in Leo (will not go away without a restraining order!)
Least Likely to Be My Date: Capricorn, Sagittarius, Virgo
Most Likely to Be My Date: Every other sign, Gemini rising
Best Lover: Pisces, Scorpioooooooo, Venus or Mars in Libra, Mars in Pisces
Worst Lover: Venus or Mars in Aries, Mars in Leo
Freakiest Lover: Sun/Venus/Mars in Aquarius (—no?? or —shouldn't?? isn't in their vocabulary)
Best Pillow-Talk: Sun or Mercury in Pisces
Best Break-Up: Cancer, Scorpio
Worst Break-Up: Any personal planet in Aries (especially Sun/Venus/Mars), Moon in Leo
Most Likely to Become Mayor of Friend Zone: Virgo, Sagittarius, Venus in Cancer
Best Ex in Friend Zone: Aries
Best Childhood BFF: Capricorn, Taurus, Sagittarius
Worst Childhood BFF: Capricorn, Saturn in Cancer
Best Adult BFF: Virgo, Moon in Pisces/Scorpio/Capricorn, Moon aspecting Uranus, Jupiter in Cancer
Worst Adult BFF: Aries, Moon in Leo
Best Communication: Mercury in Aries/Leo/Sagittarius/Libra/Scorpio/Cancer
Worst Communication: Mercury in Pisces/Gemini/Aquarius
Best Heart-to-Hearts: Cancer, Moon in Scorpio, Moon in Pisces
Worst Heart-to-Hearts: Moon in Capricorn
Best Co-Worker/Teammate: Taurus, Virgo, Cancer, Sagittarius, Capricor

I'm not a prostitute. I'm a man wh*re. 😛

Anyways, I agree.