my cards are on the table: scorpio & pisces

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waterloo
@waterloo
18 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 5 · Topics: 3
I am a scorpio and my boyfriend is a pisces. I need some unbiased advice because I feel ashamed or disloyal to our situation if I talk about it with people that know me. My pisces boyfriend and I have been dating for only about 2 years now. Prior to me he was a virgin. I noticed he has a lot of girl friends but have met very few of them. I found some emails telling girls "he could never go that far and cheat on my girlfriend. I honestly just wanted to hang out, maybe make out"....which to me is quite the mixed signal, and to me making out is cheating.. and there are more overly friendly emails from different girls... i dont think he has gone all the way, but it still really hurts... I haven't said anything about those emails. I struggle with it daily.

Another time I found some emails from guys...apparently he had put an ad on craigslist. Something about being curious about other males. wanting to give oral sex. I was DEVASTATED. I ordered a round of tests and bloodwork because aside from the emotional damage, I was worried about my health. When he came that day I was visibly ill over it. I told him. He told me he was very sorry I found those things and he could only imagine how horrible I felt. He assured me that he hadnt met any of those guys and that it was him just acting on thoughts.. and he shouldn't have been on there stringing those guys along. He then confessed to some inappropriate sexual activities that he was exposed to by another male when he was younger, and assumed that psychologicaly, thats why he had those thoughts.. It took some time, but I have been trying to be fair about that whole situation...Im not going to lie though, this has done a number on my trust (which is a whole other situation)

Another variable in the whole equation is that we are long distance.. but he is moving in with me in a week. This has been something we have been planning for over a year. So its something we have both been excited about, equally. The lease is signed the money is paid..

I wonder too if maybe some of this is his attempt at some r rated romp before he completely commits. To boost his self esteem or fill some insecurity.


I am an openminded and fogiving person. I realize that no one is perfect and neither is any relationship. I really love this guy. I want to take the good with the bad, but its just so hard and rather unhealthy to box up my emotions this way, and I was hoping maybe someone could offer some advice, help, etc...

thanks.
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maia
@maia
20 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 88 · Topics: 2
As hard as this can be I think it you are better off leaving this guy. As other people say, he is putting you at risk of stds by his behavior. If it were a case of a simple cheating with a specific woman but he is putting messages online to have sexs with people that he does not know and who by responding to his message just show just how promiscuous that they are! and that just shows that he does not care about his life nor yours! it is okay to stick it by someone sometimes when you are in love: such as they made a mistake by being with someone else (you can still leave actually! but we know how hard it is sometimes) but that is more understandable than what you are in! you deserve better! there are many men out there who can love and honor you the way that you deserve! and do not put your life at risk by sticking it out with this guy! He has major character flaws: his behavior has nothing to do with growing up! he is promiscuous and will remain so: and him having been a virgin when you met him means little with these latest facts! it is not a question of love: it is respect and safety! You have to love yourself first, remember that.
good luck and be strong