What is this LOVE for if there is no future?

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Gemitati
@Gemitati
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They are in love for about 10 years now.
Both are married for decades. Having no relationships
but as life goes they are must see each other at family gatherings.

It is painful to see them together just looking at each other with
warmth that melting ice cubes in their glasses.
They know they will never be together.

My question is - what is the point and why this love was given
to them if there is nothing to do with it but to suffer?

What stars meant when they have decided to gift them this LOVE?
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Gemitati
@Gemitati
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Posted by AgentP911
Are you still going on about that Scorp man?
Actually no, I have met somebody just in the same boat and it hit me over the head.
I can not stop wondering. These people are pure and innocent. She is my friend.
And I believe her. She said nothing ever had happened. And they are trying as hard
as they can to not to have feelings. Once touched hands accidentally. WHY—
I mean why this 'GIFT' is given?

And thanks for asking. I am fine now. My Cap husband can't keep his hands off
of me. Thanks to the affair btw. So all of you were way off. Wrong!

How are YOU doing?
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Gemitati
@Gemitati
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the state of being infatuated or obsessed with another person, typically experienced involuntarily and characterized by a strong desire for reciprocation of one's feelings but not primarily for a sexual relationship.

Exactly but how does it help anything?
We all know that without knowing the word 'limerence'
Now we know the word but how does it help to understand
purpose and existence of the pointless feelings?
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Gemitati
@Gemitati
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Posted by AgentP911
Yawn^^^ there's no need to get all high and mighty. Nobody is right or wrong. It's an Internet forum where people post their opinions and feedback on the small portion of life others care to share. He might not be able to keep his hands off you but he's not the Scorp...
Why are you so disturbed all the time?
It is just an Internet forum where people post their opinions and feedback on the small portion of life others care to share.
Why can't you be happy for a moment that someone like me back with her husband and just leave it alone?
Because your life is not so good? Apparently. Obviously.
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AgentP911
@AgentP911
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Posted by Gemitati
Posted by AgentP911
Yawn^^^ there's no need to get all high and mighty. Nobody is right or wrong. It's an Internet forum where people post their opinions and feedback on the small portion of life others care to share. He might not be able to keep his hands off you but he's not the Scorp...
Why are you so disturbed all the time?
It is just an Internet forum where people post their opinions and feedback on the small portion of life others care to share.
Why can't you be happy for a moment that someone like me back with her husband and just leave it alone?
Because your life is not so good? Apparently. Obviously.
click to expand

Disturbed? Oh do me a favour and get off your high horse before you fall off.

Back with your husband? Did you even leave him in the first place.

Nothing wrong with my life. I'm not the one trapped in a shit marriage pretending all is well and then bitching that the world isn't ecstatic and giving everyone the bird!

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Gemitati
@Gemitati
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Posted by AgentP911
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by AgentP911
Yawn^^^ there's no need to get all high and mighty. Nobody is right or wrong. It's an Internet forum where people post their opinions and feedback on the small portion of life others care to share. He might not be able to keep his hands off you but he's not the Scorp...
Why are you so disturbed all the time?
It is just an Internet forum where people post their opinions and feedback on the small portion of life others care to share.
Why can't you be happy for a moment that someone like me back with her husband and just leave it alone?
Because your life is not so good? Apparently. Obviously.
Disturbed? Oh do me a favour and get off your high horse before you fall off.

Back with your husband? Did you even leave him in the first place.

Nothing wrong with my life. I'm not the one trapped in a shit marriage pretending all is well and then bitching that the world isn't ecstatic and giving everyone the bird!

click to expand

There is definitely something wrong with you.
I am telling the story.
You jumping right in with a question about my past.
When I am explaining - you telling me nasty stuff about my husband being not whom I want.
Don't you see how stupid and nasty it is? Happy people don't do this to others.
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AgentP911
@AgentP911
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Posted by Gemitati
Posted by AgentP911
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by AgentP911
Yawn^^^ there's no need to get all high and mighty. Nobody is right or wrong. It's an Internet forum where people post their opinions and feedback on the small portion of life others care to share. He might not be able to keep his hands off you but he's not the Scorp...
Why are you so disturbed all the time?
It is just an Internet forum where people post their opinions and feedback on the small portion of life others care to share.
Why can't you be happy for a moment that someone like me back with her husband and just leave it alone?
Because your life is not so good? Apparently. Obviously.
Disturbed? Oh do me a favour and get off your high horse before you fall off.

Back with your husband? Did you even leave him in the first place.

Nothing wrong with my life. I'm not the one trapped in a shit marriage pretending all is well and then bitching that the world isn't ecstatic and giving everyone the bird!
There is definitely something wrong with you.
I am telling the story.
You jumping right in with a question about my past.
When I am explaining - you telling me nasty stuff about my husband being not whom I want.
Don't you see how stupid and nasty it is? Happy people don't do this to others.
click to expand

Happy people don't bitch about their husbands and lust after other men and post numerous threads about wanting to be with other men etc.

1. I didn't jump in. You made a thread and it was unclear who or what it was actually about so I asked if it related to the Scorp. I really don't see the issue there.

2. I've said no nasty stuff about your husband who I don't know at all. Please refer yourself back to your threads about how unhappy you were and how you didn't want to be with him etc. You'll see I've said no nasty stuff.

3. Don't you see how stupid and nasty you have been over fuck all.

4. I don't give a shit about what you do and who you do it with but fuck me you're a real prize cunt. I'm glad it's all worked out for you.
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TaureanVirgo
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Posted by Gemitati
the state of being infatuated or obsessed with another person, typically experienced involuntarily and characterized by a strong desire for reciprocation of one's feelings but not primarily for a sexual relationship.

Exactly but how does it help anything?
We all know that without knowing the word 'limerence'
Now we know the word but how does it help to understand
purpose and existence of the pointless feelings?
Well, they exist because something within you is broken. You have a habit of developing attachments to the unattainable; unavailable people, and delusions of grandeur when it comes to how you imagine a relationship with these people will go.

The limerence will continue for as long as it takes you to resolve your issues. The reason it's gone on with the Scorpio so long is because you are broken/unhappy, and you don't know him. You don't really know him. You've never had a real relationship with him, so you've not yet had the experience to tell you (or show you) just why that relationship will never work...That it will never be the way you imagine it.

Chances are that if you were to get into a real relationship with him; reality would hit, your feelings for him would dissolve, and you'd find another unavailable man/unattainable relationship (fantasy) to attach yourself to. That is, unless you decide to do the work to resolve your own inner conflict (grow up/evolve). Only then, will the this cycle be broken.
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TaureanVirgo
@TaureanVirgo
12 Years

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Posted by Gemitati
the state of being infatuated or obsessed with another person, typically experienced involuntarily and characterized by a strong desire for reciprocation of one's feelings but not primarily for a sexual relationship.

Exactly but how does it help anything?
We all know that without knowing the word 'limerence'
Now we know the word but how does it help to understand
purpose and existence of the pointless feelings?
Well, they exist because something within you is broken. You have a habit of developing attachments to the unattainable; unavailable people, and delusions of grandeur when it comes to how you imagine a relationship with these people will go.

The limerence will continue for as long as it takes you to resolve your issues. The reason it's gone on with the Scorpio so long is because you are broken/unhappy, and you don't know him. You don't really know him. You've never had a real relationship with him, so you've not yet had the experience to tell you (or show you) just why that relationship will never work...That it will never be the way you imagine it.

Chances are that if you were to get into a real relationship with him; reality would hit, your feelings for him would dissolve, and you'd find another unavailable man/unattainable relationship (fantasy) to attach yourself to. That is, unless you decide to do the work to resolve your own inner conflict (grow up/evolve). Only then, will the this cycle be broken.
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Gemitati
@Gemitati
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Comments: 2057 · Posts: 38091 · Topics: 1026
Posted by TaureanVirgo
Posted by Gemitati
the state of being infatuated or obsessed with another person, typically experienced involuntarily and characterized by a strong desire for reciprocation of one's feelings but not primarily for a sexual relationship.

Exactly but how does it help anything?
We all know that without knowing the word 'limerence'
Now we know the word but how does it help to understand
purpose and existence of the pointless feelings?
Well, they exist because something within you is broken. You have a habit of developing attachments to the unattainable; unavailable people, and delusions of grandeur when it comes to how you imagine a relationship with these people will go.

The limerence will continue for as long as it takes you to resolve your issues. The reason it's gone on with the Scorpio so long is because you are broken/unhappy, and you don't know him. You don't really know him. You've never had a real relationship with him, so you've not yet had the experience to tell you (or show you) just why that relationship will never work...That it will never be the way you imagine it.

Chances are that if you were to get into a real relationship with him; reality would hit, your feelings for him would dissolve, and you'd find another unavailable man/unattainable relationship (fantasy) to attach yourself to. That is, unless you decide to do the work to resolve your own inner conflict (grow up/evolve). Only then, will the this cycle be broken.
click to expand

I am actually understanding what you are saying. And I appreciate your insight.
If it is about me - you are correct. It is running trough my mind that I would probably be like
WHO is this person? But I am still wondering what if...and can't get it out of my mind.
Praying to have it disappear. I do not need it. I DO NOT NEED THIS!!!
And I am sure it is not about availability. The other person could had been single. Right?
I had never thought of him this way when I though he was happily married. Never. Just a
friend whom we had tons of things common. Its when he says he is so not happy and other stuff😢

So when I saw others going trough the SAME almost stuff I started to wonder again WHY and
WHAT FOR this torture is given to people?
There people held hands ones. Connection is still there for a decade. Every time she knows she
is going to see him at the family party she is sleepless for a week. My heart goes on to her.
And I understand her and I am wondering...how many people are having same issue and suffering?
What is the Universe's point in this?
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Gemitati
@Gemitati
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You said
unless you decide to do the work to resolve your own inner conflict (grow up/evolve). Only then, will the this cycle be broken.

and trust me work is going on and on and on. It is just not happening. So tell me what to do next.
Thanks

And what if this would work just fine? Why do you think it would never work? Are you 100% positive? Why?
Very curious.
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Gemitati
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Posted by starlover
Posted by TaureanVirgo
When you learn the distinction between limerence and real Love, is when you will have the answer to your question...
I wonder how many do?


click to expand

I say no one.
I understood only part that you can't fall out of LOVE but limerence is when love can end.
But I am sure it is wrong to say that.
So I am still waiting for the response.
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Gemitati
@Gemitati
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Posted by starlover
I am sure lots do.....including myself (in the past)


The illusion can cloud the reality

Neptune anyone?
Illusion can cloud reality for sure.
But when you are in love how do you know IF it is illusion or for real and honestly who cares?
You feeling something for somebody - that all is counts. Right?

Why do we even trying to determine if it is love? I am feeling it - so it IS!
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Gemitati
@Gemitati
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Posted by starlover
I think if they are thinking that much, they could be obsessed...


If they still feel the same living day in, day out with each other, seeing the best and the worst, being put to the test by many things, then that could be love


Anyway, hope you find your answer

I found it....the love for my son ... nothing else compares. If i find that for a man one day, that is good, if i dont that is good too

I hope you will find it.

And obsessed they obviously are!
If they could only spend time together and figure out - it is not what It seems
OR
to become the happiest people on Earth!
But it is not going to happen! So my question is still remaining. Does everything in life make sense and has purpose?
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LetltB
@LetltB
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Posted by Gemitati
Posted by AgentP911
Are you still going on about that Scorp man?
Actually no, I have met somebody just in the same boat and it hit me over the head.
I can not stop wondering. These people are pure and innocent. She is my friend.
And I believe her. She said nothing ever had happened. And they are trying as hard
as they can to not to have feelings. Once touched hands accidentally. WHY—
I mean why this 'GIFT' is given?

And thanks for asking. I am fine now. My Cap husband can't keep his hands off
of me. Thanks to the affair btw. So all of you were way off. Wrong!

How are YOU doing?
click to expand

Horseshit!
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MsTeeq1974
@MsTeeq1974
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Posted by TaureanVirgo
Posted by Gemitati
the state of being infatuated or obsessed with another person, typically experienced involuntarily and characterized by a strong desire for reciprocation of one's feelings but not primarily for a sexual relationship.

Exactly but how does it help anything?
We all know that without knowing the word 'limerence'
Now we know the word but how does it help to understand
purpose and existence of the pointless feelings?
Well, they exist because something within you is broken. You have a habit of developing attachments to the unattainable; unavailable people, and delusions of grandeur when it comes to how you imagine a relationship with these people will go.

The limerence will continue for as long as it takes you to resolve your issues. The reason it's gone on with the Scorpio so long is because you are broken/unhappy, and you don't know him. You don't really know him. You've never had a real relationship with him, so you've not yet had the experience to tell you (or show you) just why that relationship will never work...That it will never be the way you imagine it.

Chances are that if you were to get into a real relationship with him; reality would hit, your feelings for him would dissolve, and you'd find another unavailable man/unattainable relationship (fantasy) to attach yourself to. That is, unless you decide to do the work to resolve your own inner conflict (grow up/evolve). Only then, will the this cycle be broken.
click to expand

Standing ovation worthy description of why people feel love, but don't respond to it like they love the other or like they're being LOVED by the other. The sad and crazy part is that broken people come together with all of these "love" feelings all of the time. We've romanticized limerence, unrequited love, obsession, and other love like substitutes to the point that they're all now lumped into one category...love. Love is never the same, it's ever changing in it's application, but it is consistent as well as supports the other person is FEELING loved/free. The tighter a person holds on, the more I see that it's not love after all. Love gives you grace, room, space, etc. It doesn't tighten the reigns and choke you into submission and it doesn't throw up ultimatum boundaries that make you surrender because you're in between a rock and a hard place.
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Undine
@Undine
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Comments: 1552 · Posts: 8895 · Topics: 11
I'd also been infatuated for about 10 years and I know the unbelievable amount of energy it creates. All those released neurotransmitters could be put to a good use! I used to think of him as my muse. Someone I had to impress with my achievements. Someone I used to overcome my natural procrastination tendency.

Get creative and write, paint or do whatever you feel like. Plan to better your career or change to a more fulfilling job. Volunteer to talk to some "happy" but lonely people. Help the poor. And stop moaning. You know it feels GOOD. It's the opposite of dull. Enjoy it as long as it lasts.

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AgentP911
@AgentP911
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Posted by LetltB
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by AgentP911
Are you still going on about that Scorp man?
Actually no, I have met somebody just in the same boat and it hit me over the head.
I can not stop wondering. These people are pure and innocent. She is my friend.
And I believe her. She said nothing ever had happened. And they are trying as hard
as they can to not to have feelings. Once touched hands accidentally. WHY—
I mean why this 'GIFT' is given?

And thanks for asking. I am fine now. My Cap husband can't keep his hands off
of me. Thanks to the affair btw. So all of you were way off. Wrong!

How are YOU doing?
Horseshit!
click to expand

Exactly! Then she starts going on about lust and love and unavailable people.

Frankly, I can't be arsed to respond to her earlier justification of 'oh you jumped all over my post first, you did, you did, you did, you must be following me because you care but I don't care about you...' Yawn.

No love, it's an open Internet forum and you just happened to post in a section I was looking at and I recalled your story mainly because you filled the Scorp board etc up with loads of threads about it. Bless her, she's a bit clueless.

Apologies Gem, I have an excellent memory for most things, you're not so special after all.

Please feel free to flatter yourself. Gem's can be rather superficial and susceptible to flattery.
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Undine
@Undine
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She asked a very good question, actually. You obviously don't know the answer.

So stop bullying her for being brave enough to admit to something that is probably extremely common.

You don't know what your partner is thinking while jumping your bones. Until he calls someone else's name! The sad things is, people like you are hit harder when reality opens their eyes. They become intolerant and bitter for life. I wonder who's fault is it? They tried to be LESS human than the norm. They got burned with their unrealistic expectations. They thought they owned their partner, with exclusive rights to their thoughts and desires. How deluded is that?


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AgentP911
@AgentP911
11 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1 · Posts: 3847 · Topics: 1
Posted by Nevermore
Posted by AgentP911
Posted by LetltB
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by AgentP911
Are you still going on about that Scorp man?
Actually no, I have met somebody just in the same boat and it hit me over the head.
I can not stop wondering. These people are pure and innocent. She is my friend.
And I believe her. She said nothing ever had happened. And they are trying as hard
as they can to not to have feelings. Once touched hands accidentally. WHY—
I mean why this 'GIFT' is given?

And thanks for asking. I am fine now. My Cap husband can't keep his hands off
of me. Thanks to the affair btw. So all of you were way off. Wrong!

How are YOU doing?
Horseshit!
Exactly! Then she starts going on about lust and love and unavailable people.

Frankly, I can't be arsed to respond to her earlier justification of 'oh you jumped all over my post first, you did, you did, you did, you must be following me because you care but I don't care about you...' Yawn.

No love, it's an open Internet forum and you just happened to post in a section I was looking at and I recalled your story mainly because you filled the Scorp board etc up with loads of threads about it. Bless her, she's a bit clueless.

Apologies Gem, I have an excellent memory for most things, you're not so special after all.

Please feel free to flatter yourself. Gem's can be rather superficial and susceptible to flattery.
You know she has Leo moon.
click to expand

Oh God... That explains the 'me, me, me, look at meeeeeee' thing she has going on!

*disclaimer - not including all Leo Moon's*
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AgentP911
@AgentP911
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Posted by Nevermore
Posted by AgentP911
Posted by Nevermore
Posted by AgentP911

No love, it's an open Internet forum and you just happened to post in a section I was looking at and I recalled your story mainly because you filled the Scorp board etc up with loads of threads about it. Bless her, she's a bit clueless.

Apologies Gem, I have an excellent memory for most things, you're not so special after all.

Please feel free to flatter yourself. Gem's can be rather superficial and susceptible to flattery.
You know she has Leo moon.
Oh God... That explains the 'me, me, me, look at meeeeeee' thing she has going on!

*disclaimer - not including all Leo Moon's*
Well.. (Even though you want to add disclaimer).. the main problem with Leo moons are since I have actually noticed on dxp that no matter to have the most clearest explanation, they'll continuously on to behave that for getting some attentions.. Including their stubbornness with denial that creates the negativity to respond that..

Or pretend to be stubbornness for getting all those negativity, no matter the negativity.. they grieve to have a lot of post.

I mean look at busyeyes for example with those libra post. Or that Firebunny and CC.
click to expand

Ha! Agree but my disclaimer was there because I couldn't be arsed to deal with anyone coming on to state the obvious that not all Leo moon placements... Blah blah blah...

I agree about the attention in this case. I read it and thought to myself 'wtf is she banging on about? Is this for real? Don't flatter yourself love! Nobody really cares!'
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Gemitati
@Gemitati
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Comments: 2057 · Posts: 38091 · Topics: 1026
Posted by Undine
I'd also been infatuated for about 10 years and I know the unbelievable amount of energy it creates. All those released neurotransmitters could be put to a good use! I used to think of him as my muse. Someone I had to impress with my achievements. Someone I used to overcome my natural procrastination tendency.

Get creative and write, paint or do whatever you feel like. Plan to better your career or change to a more fulfilling job. Volunteer to talk to some "happy" but lonely people. Help the poor. And stop moaning. You know it feels GOOD. It's the opposite of dull. Enjoy it as long as it lasts.
Thanks for your wonderful eye opening posts.

Is it over for you by now?
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Undine
@Undine
12 Years5,000+ Posts

Comments: 1552 · Posts: 8895 · Topics: 11
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Undine
I'd also been infatuated for about 10 years and I know the unbelievable amount of energy it creates. All those released neurotransmitters could be put to a good use! I used to think of him as my muse. Someone I had to impress with my achievements. Someone I used to overcome my natural procrastination tendency.

Get creative and write, paint or do whatever you feel like. Plan to better your career or change to a more fulfilling job. Volunteer to talk to some "happy" but lonely people. Help the poor. And stop moaning. You know it feels GOOD. It's the opposite of dull. Enjoy it as long as it lasts.
Thanks for your wonderful eye opening posts.

Is it over for you by now?
click to expand

🙂.

It's been over since 2010. Shame it is over, it had only positive effects on my ambition. I tried to be as productive as him, but the bar was set far too high.

I may have to reinstate him as my muse, or see if Gem boyfriend could take over this role. If only I could feel the same drive to impress my Gem! He should challenge me more.
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Gemitati
@Gemitati
10 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 2057 · Posts: 38091 · Topics: 1026
Posted by Undine
Posted by Gemitati
Posted by Undine
I'd also been infatuated for about 10 years and I know the unbelievable amount of energy it creates. All those released neurotransmitters could be put to a good use! I used to think of him as my muse. Someone I had to impress with my achievements. Someone I used to overcome my natural procrastination tendency.

Get creative and write, paint or do whatever you feel like. Plan to better your career or change to a more fulfilling job. Volunteer to talk to some "happy" but lonely people. Help the poor. And stop moaning. You know it feels GOOD. It's the opposite of dull. Enjoy it as long as it lasts.
Thanks for your wonderful eye opening posts.

Is it over for you by now?
🙂.

It's been over since 2010. Shame it is over, it had only positive effects on my ambition. I tried to be as productive as him, but the bar was set far too high.

I may have to reinstate him as my muse, or see if Gem boyfriend could take over this role. If only I could feel the same drive to impress my Gem! He should challenge me more.
click to expand

No one ever told me THAT! 🙂 Thanks