Humor

The Sagittarius Character Portrait

Sagittarians are born adventurers. They like smashing spiders with their bare hands and trying to walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night with the lights out. They would sooner sustain crippling injury than do anything the easy way.

Sagittarians love to entertain their friends, family, and total strangers. This often includes transvesticism. Nearly every Sagittarian was born into the wrong gender.

Sagittarians are loud and have no social graces. They seek to offend. Sagittarians usually have nicknames like Thunderpooper or Vomitus Maximus.

Animals and small children love Sagittarians. This is unfortunate since adults usually hate them. However, Sagittarians make excellent circus freaks and vagrants.

Sagittarians use interpretive dance to describe philosophical concepts.

Buttons and bumper stickers with rude sayings on them are a trademark of the Sagittarian. They throw food at expensive restaurants and ask lots of questions in the middle of church. Don't ever bring a Sagittarius home to meet your parents. He or she will tie up your mother and pants your dad.

Famous Sagittarians include the Geo Metro.

The holiday during which the sun is in Sagittarius is Thanksgiving. This is highly appropriate since everyone eats until they're sick and passes out while a bunch of cross-dressers and huge inflatable things wander through the streets of New York, the most Sagittarian town in the universe. The Shriners driving around in the tiny little cars are a very Sagittarian image. Even more so if there's a ridiculously busty woman stuffed into the car as well.

A Sagittarius is always a better Madonna than Madonna. Men can pull off sequins, and women can pull off construction helmets. The Sagittarius is incapable of being unhip.

I don't know if you are a sag or not but this must have
been your mood when you wrote this page because that dose not desribe me or any other sag I know. Do your homework on sag befor you go miss representing.

C'mon.. it's a parody. And it's been clipped from the web, truly. Hi Fate, come back and grab a chair.

lol, dontcha hate it when people get all upset over something you didn't write?

Relax Fate, we'd be happy to have you back so you can represent.

this sounds like my bestfriend!! hahaha!!! well not all of it ...but mostly. muehehehe. but it definetly doesnt sound like my boyfriend

lol i love it when i dont have to stick up for myself

i think NO, NO i KNOW this person who wrote this garbbage about sag's were either A)drunk at the time or B) just been dumped by a sag i like option B better dont you sag's hahaha

LOL~~~ That was deffinantly cute!! Completely untrue, but cute all the same...

Come on Fate it was supposed to be a funny...."*smile*" 😉