@deelia
11 Years
taking it slow...
Why Scorpios Often Take Things Slow in Relationships
Scorpios tend to be cautious and deliberate about emotional investments. They often prefer to build trust gradually before progressing, which explains their slow pace. This does not necessarily mean they are stringing you along but rather that they value deep connection and need time to feel secure.
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Posted by Arielle83
You said you're in the fwb stage. Doesn't that answer your question?
It doesn't because he said "not ready for a relationship ATM" NOT "I don't want a relationship" my question is if this is worth waiting for? Like will he ever want more/relationship?
Posted by deelia
Why would a Scorpio want to take things slow? We're slowly climbing out of the fb zone and into fwb zone. There's a small difference. He knows I like him, I tell him all the time, being Taurus I'm so possessive and jealous that I want him to be mine already, but he wants to take it slow. I'm patient and will wait but wanting to know if it was worth it or if Scorpio is stringing me along? The other day he came over t my sisters and met a few of my family and it was the first time we hung out without having sex the same day. The next day he asked to take things a bit slower and now he doesn't text me back anymore (hot and cold).What's his deal? I don't want to wait around for nothing. He hasn't said no he doesn't want to be with me, just not now but I'm wondering if that's because there's someone on the side?
For someone to be "on the side" you would have to be the main. You're not. You've settled for scraps. There is no hot and cold about his behaviour. If you want more (and feel you deserve more) then don't settle. He's going slow because he can and you've let him reduce you to that.
What's his deal? I don't want to wait around for nothing. He hasn't said no he doesn't want to be with me, just not now but I'm wondering if that's because there's someone on the side?
You do not get to ask questions when you choose to be a side piece.
READ CAREFULLY
FWB/Booty Call Agreement: (you agreed now here are the rules)
OP,
Like a drunkard behind the wheel,
And a foolish man who kills and steals.
And a foolish woman who lies many an alibi,
To no avail, excuses, excuses, she surely tries.
Truth and consequences,
Rewards and recompenses.
And like LGBT, FWB is a pretty dumb thing to be.
Let's be honest with ourselves and consider the things we see.
You're free to do whatever you want.
And you'll do that whatever you choose,
But truth be told, from ages old, there is a haunt,
For all these things, the piper's held to pay his dues.
These foolish things, people doin',
Shall surely come, for to haunt, in their ruin.
Now, I'm not tryin' to be forceful, hateful and mean.
I'm only telling you what I have seen.
Posted by tiziani
That's the first time I've seen someone imply fwb is a state you can climb up to... interesting though.
It's called desperation at it's finest level.
"finest level" = LOWEST LEVEL
Posted by LetltB
"finest level" = LOWEST LEVELSee, the OP infiltrated your mind just for one second there LIB 😄
The power of new concepts!
click to expand
We are speaking about desperate levels females will go right?
The "infiltrated your mind" I don't understand 😕
Posted by MrFirebird
OP,
Like a drunkard behind the wheel,
And a foolish man who kills and steals.
And a foolish woman who lies many an alibi,
To no avail, excuses, excuses, she surely tries.
Truth and consequences,
Rewards and recompenses.
And like LGBT, FWB is a pretty dumb thing to be.
Let's be honest with ourselves and consider the things we see.
You're free to do whatever you want.
And you'll do that whatever you choose,
But truth be told, from ages old, there is a haunt,
For all these things, the piper's held to pay his dues.
These foolish things, people doin',
Shall surely come, for to haunt, in their ruin.
Now, I'm not tryin' to be forceful, hateful and mean.
I'm only telling you what I have seen.
I like how you wrote it as a poem. Very nice.
FWBs are nothing more than people who USE each other for personal gratification.
Last time I checked, TRUE friends do NOT USE their friends.
People who casually do this or agree with it don't get that someone is going to get hurt.
It may be the man, it may be the woman. It MAY even be the baby that often enters
the picture when least expected. What happens when FWB falls apart, afterwards?
A storm of mixed emotions and in some cases, the tearing apart of families.
For some, and this HAS happened, many times, the emotions can be so severe, that murder and/or suicide can result from the stress it wields.
On the other hand, one may be emotionally shattered for the rest of their lives. For them,
happiness and joy has all gone away. And for what? An hour of passionate intimacy?
For others, who are truly emotionally immature, will likely be the ones who end up
bunny hopping their way to the grave via a murder scene at the hands of past lover, or spouse, hell bent for vengeance.
Sex can be a very powerful drug. The physical act can tweak the soul to mind-bendingly warped proportions.
It's not a toy and shouldn't be treated as such. But fools do.
"You can't influence Scorpio - Taurus or not."
Not always true.
Besides you are a Gemini and not even with a scorpio and not a taurus.
I respect my taurus and he can I influence me. Although, this is in a relationship OP.
Posted by MrFirebird
OP,
Like a drunkard behind the wheel,
And a foolish man who kills and steals.
And a foolish woman who lies many an alibi,
To no avail, excuses, excuses, she surely tries.
Truth and consequences,
Rewards and recompenses.
And like LGBT, FWB is a pretty dumb thing to be.
Let's be honest with ourselves and consider the things we see.
You're free to do whatever you want.
And you'll do that whatever you choose,
But truth be told, from ages old, there is a haunt,
For all these things, the piper's held to pay his dues.
These foolish things, people doin',
Shall surely come, for to haunt, in their ruin.
Now, I'm not tryin' to be forceful, hateful and mean.
I'm only telling you what I have seen.I like how you wrote it as a poem. Very nice.
click to expand
Thank you, Eris.
YW 🙂
Posted by MrFirebird
OP,
etc.I like how you wrote it as a poem. Very nice.
This poem sounds to me like 'I mean no insult'
and insult following...click to expand
Well, gem, that is because you chose to take it as such, rather than
taking it as a word of wisdom.
I could have said, "The stove is hot. Don't touch or you'll get burned.
Of course, to paraphrase your reply, you would say "that warning sounds to me like an insult"
To which I would say "Don't believe me? Go ahead, touch the stove."
You either quickly and thoughtlessly say "OK! 🙂 " or after giving it some thought "No! I don't want to!"
Or.... storm out the house or... you could pull a stunted off the wall Sag moment and say something like "YOU ARE INSANE!!!!"
To which I'd have to ask "What is insanity? Me warning you that the stove is hot or you wanting to find out on your own?"
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Posted by Gemi9
I was getting it fromYou're free to do whatever you want.
and then
For all these things, the piper's held to pay his dues.
So it is like so contradictory.
You can do whatever but you will pay for it.So how is it you can do whatever?
I think he's just saying "you're free to do what you want, but understand your actions will have consequences." If you choose to be fwb you run a risk of never moving past that or getting hurt.
Posted by Gemi9
I was getting it fromYou're free to do whatever you want.
and then
For all these things, the piper's held to pay his dues.
So it is like so contradictory.
You can do whatever but you will pay for it.So how is it you can do whatever?
I think he's just saying "you're free to do what you want, but understand your actions will have consequences." If you choose to be fwb you run a risk of never moving past that or getting hurt.
click to expand
+1
Posted by Gemi9
I was getting it fromYou're free to do whatever you want.
and then
For all these things, the piper's held to pay his dues.
So it is like so contradictory.
You can do whatever but you will pay for it.So how is it you can do whatever?
Gem,
It's very simple.
You are "free" to do whatever you want. You have a free will. BUT......... know
that the choices you make CAN wield severely punishing consequences.
You see, everyone has a "free will". HOWEVER, not everyone will exercise wise discretion when given
a choice. In this case, the subject is FWB. Sooner or later, there will come a parting of ways, simply because there is no commitment from either one or both. Neither is there mutual respect
for each other's feelings. I refer to my previous comment about FWB being nothing more than
"friends" who USE each other for personal gratification. First and foremost, it is wrong to
use people. Make no mistake, it is wrong to USE, MISUSE and ABUSE your friends, your family, spouse, or anyone else, for personal gain. No ifs ands or buts about it. Ironically, "Friends With Benefits" by it's very name, describes "SELFISHNESS" with "WHAT'S IN IT FOR MEEEE?!!—", it's true definition.
In no way shape or form do I personally condone FWB. ESPECIALLY when casual sex is the point of
the relationship.
Nevertheless, like anything else, you're free to make that decision for yourselves. But when the bill of consequences for immoral and perverse sexual behaviors come, and they surely will, you will the ones to pay dearly for it.
If people truly knew and understood the consequences of jumping in the sack before they jumped, they might give it second thought and not be so quick to do so, only to find that the REWARD for exercising wisdom is avoiding the pain and suffering of those consequences.
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Posted by exoskeleton
taking it slow, lol.
As opposed to taking it too fast?
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Posted by tiziani
That's the first time I've seen someone imply fwb is a state you can climb up to... interesting though.
LOL
Posted by IrresistableScorp
Please listen future people who like a scorp and are offered and FWB situation! Thanks.Do not under any circumstance accept FWB with a scorp if you think you may want more. This is a test. A scorp will never respect a person who gives their body away in such a gratuitous manner. And once scorp determines it doesn't respect you, good luck ever getting more than FWB.
You see, if it is so easy for you to agree to sleep with this scorp even though it goes against your own wishes for more, then it will be easy for someone else to seduce you in the same way!
In conclusion, if scorp offers FWB and you really want a relationship, tell him to take a hike. Make a stand and be willing to lose said scorp over this.
Show the scorp your integrity means more than a momentary sexual release.This has been a public service announcement.
*clicks the "LIKE" link*
love the last sentence 😄
Hmmmm. You know...
Besides FWB, there are many other ways a person can ruin their lives.
Regardless the techniques chosen, the results are the same.
Below is a perfect example of the consequences of engaging in very foolish behavior.
Ryan Dunn was a Jackass. Drinking and Driving, he made his choice and the piper came and collected his dues.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ryan_Dunn
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It boggles my mind that there are people out there this thick-headed.
Ok so by fb - I mean we only talked when one or the other wanted sent. Now we have heart to heart talks and hang out on days where we don't even need to have sex. So yeah, I'd think that was a step up. But also IDK WHAT HE FEELS, HE WONT OPEN UP. Guys please read my post properly. He said he's not ready right now, not never. His answers to anything I bring up along this subject are neither a yes or a no, its always a maybe, not right now or in the future.
And by someone on the side I meant someone on the side of our agreement of being exclusive. Which makes sense. Also he's confirmed to me that he IS mine, without the whole relationship part.
Posted by Gemi9
Isn't fwb is a mutual agreement? Who is using whom in this agreement? It is mu-tu-al!
The stupid part is when one forgets an agreement and starting to think there is relationship.
IF it was just a casual sex when they get together by agreement and having sex and go do
whatever is that they were doing it would be easy.
However we are talking about it like if it was any important.
We talking a pain and suffering they can endure. WHY!
When someone falls in love with fwb - it is a whole another issue.
It is becoming the same exactly love me - love me not as for people who weren't fwb ever.
If it hurts it hurts for every human being. And no one knows IF fwb will transfer into more.
Because he was the first sex I had in 2 years, so no I don't just "give it away" to just anyone....
Posted by Arielle83
You said you're in the fwb stage. Doesn't that answer your question?It doesn't because he said "not ready for a relationship ATM" NOT "I don't want a relationship" my question is if this is worth waiting for? Like will he ever want more/relationship?
Why would he commit to a relationship with a woman that is giving it away ?
click to expand
Because I hadn't had sex in 2 years so i m not just "giving it away" to just anyone....
It boggles my mind that there are people out there this thick-headed.
OMG! I was looking for people over 20 here! Where do you hang out?
I'm making a prediction that her logic will not match up with yours.
click to expand
No doubt... I started laughing when I read that.
Totally barking up the wrong tree, but I think she needs to hear some P logic.
It boggles my mind that there are people out there this thick-headed.
OMG! I was looking for people over 20 here! Where do you hang out?
I'm making a prediction that her logic will not match up with yours.
No doubt... I started laughing when I read that.
Totally barking up the wrong tree, but I think she needs to hear some P logic.
click to expand
I didn't hear her bark. Did she bark? I don't hear too good.
She did! It was a little bark ... Could have been easily missed.
Yorkie style.
Posted by Eris
She did! It was a little bark ... Could have been easily missed.
Yorkie style.
She barks like a Yorkie?
Your puttin me on.
Go make yourself a friend then... What are you waiting for?
I wasn't asking why you are on the internet... Read! You are extremely hard to communicate with because you don't seem to read properly.
She's 22, peeps. He 23.
I guess she is using the word fwb because of those idiotic movies from Timberlake and Kutcher.
In reality this may be a normal encounter of young scorpio male with a young Taurus female.
He wants love as his ancestors wanted love 50 years ago at his age. But he has learned from media to tell girls he's not ready yet for a rel.sh.t.
Posted by deelia
Also he's confirmed to me that he IS mine, without the whole relationship part.... how does that work?
click to expand
Right. Smh. Still holding onto scraps.
Posted by deelia
Also he's confirmed to me that he IS mine, without the whole relationship part.... how does that work?
click to expand
It doesn't work.
So, therefore ... her delusion must be massive.
of late ... seems to be Taurus chics.
I haven't a clue how Scorpios handle this relationship. How do you deal with a person who isn't even aware of you?
Gemfiregal, is that you?
Posted by deelia
And by someone on the side I meant someone on the side of our agreement of being exclusive. Which makes sense. Also he's confirmed to me that he IS mine, without the whole relationship part.
Oh? What agreement?
Posted by deelia
Why would a Scorpio want to take things slow? We're slowly climbing out of the fb zone and into fwb zone. There's a small difference. He knows I like him, I tell him all the time, being Taurus I'm so possessive and jealous that I want him to be mine already, but he wants to take it slow. I'm patient and will wait but wanting to know if it was worth it or if Scorpio is stringing me along? The other day he came over t my sisters and met a few of my family and it was the first time we hung out without having sex the same day. The next day he asked to take things a bit slower and now he doesn't text me back anymore (hot and cold).What's his deal? I don't want to wait around for nothing. He hasn't said no he doesn't want to be with me, just not now but I'm wondering if that's because there's someone on the side?
click to expand
The mere fact that you are wondering if you're being strung along suggest you do not have an agreement of exclusivity, but a lot of dreaming, hoping, wishing, begging and pleading attached to empty words.
Yes, I just read the update. You had a "heart to heart" (yet he won't open up emotionally 😕) and now he knows to hold off on making this just about sex---especially if he still wants sex with no strings attached to continue...when did you make this agreement?
Deelia, you've already answered the question in your OP (as most posters do), but you refuse to see it. And so the prequel to yet another "Scorp men are such mean mofos" begins....
*thread
"I don't want to wait around for nothing."
The question is if you play his game for several years (including your changes and transformations), will you be happy the day he says, "Yuppie, you passed all the tests. we gonna marry".
How much patience have you brought with you? Are you a dog? Or a cat?
I have a theory. Any rel.sh.t which has to be discussed on an Internet forum has already failed.
OP,
if you are interested in marriage and children in your twenties, pleeeeeease don't waste your time with FWB.
First you reach for the stars. 20ies are your golden age. For education and for building a family.
Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted. one moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?
Later if not lucky you have then time of your life to start FWB. All the men on the earth would want it.
Posted by Hotbeefy
Ok I figured her out with her age. She's 22, but...AND WTF WITH THAT OTHER POST AT SAGITTARIUS?? https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/sagittarius/sagittarian-ex-boyfriend-5346140/#5346141 You seriously wanted to talk back to your ex-sag although you are into 'real people' Scorpio friends rather to called "FWB"?
Trying to be 'mysterious':
https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/scorpio/im-not-mysterious-5307368/#5307369And even with that other post of your 'lil crush':
https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/aquarius/where-does-this-taurus-f-stand-5307375/#5307376And claiming that you have a child AT THE AGE OF 22:
https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/taurus/taurus-woman-say-she-wants-to-be-friends-but-5320102/#5324661ARE YOU TROLL OR DUMBASS MISERABLE, DEELIA?
Hotty, where's the problem? She's real.
1. she's started too early to be irresponsible and got her Baby.
2. no she'd appreciate her luck to get a new man, a responsible one with whom she can have a child later.
3. but her reality (too much lust for her age) has overhauled her. And she is in the middle of an FWB.
4. she hopes not every man is irrisponsible and want to abuse her. So she fantasizes how the scorp one could be serious.
5. nobody knows. even not the scorp.
6. but most likely she'll only get used by men because she does not put effort into education. And accept FWB with 22.
Accepting FWB = I'm not hot or crazier than that.
I would not call it donkey or miserable. (isn't it insulting?)
We do not know enough of her life. Maybe she was once married and lost him to death. Maybe she is going to school now. Or is working to make a life for her. (yet the child came too early into her life)
Lol
We all know Gem should be the judge on holiness... She cheats, but it's okay because she isn't in love with her husband 😐
OP you're looking for us to predict what he means my not now verses never. Unfortunately we can't, so you have to work with what he has told you. Time waits for NO ONE, you have to chose how you want to use your time. You can take his pennies and make an investment in hopes you will make a profit, or go elsewhere where there is a sure bet. You're young you got a little room for relationship fuck-ups, but just make sure you learn from your mistakes and make better choices in the future. Start learning who you are and what you will and will not tolerate. Don't play the victim and don't be a fool, follow your intuition, its usually right. By you coming here to post, something is telling you something isnt right about the situation. We are all telling you not to do it, but like MrFirebird stated, we all have freedom of choice. If your looking for confirmation to you already knowing you want to continue on, you may not get it here. Take all the advise given, weigh the pros and cons and make an intelligent decision based on what's best for you and your happiness. Good luck young lady 🙂
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Why would a Scorpio want to take things slow? We're slowly climbing out of the fb zone and into fwb zone. There's a small difference. He knows I like him, I tell him all the time, being Taurus I'm so possessive and jealous that I want him to be mine already, but he wants to take it slow. I'm patient and will wait but wanting to know if it was worth it or if Scorpio is stringing me along? The other day he came over t my sisters and met a few of my family and it was the first time we hung out without having sex the same day. The next day he asked to take things a bit slower and now he doesn't text me back anymore (hot and cold).
What's his deal? I don't want to wait around for nothing. He hasn't said no he doesn't want to be with me, just not now but I'm wondering if that's because there's someone on the side?