How do I give my Taurus time when I can't live without him! Please Help (Page 2)

Posted by TheCancerGirl

I left a 4 year relationship myself ..

Let me guess ..... you were fucking this guy before you left that 4 year relationship. What other reason is there to use it as justification otherwise?

So, you cheated on another man to be with this one .... lol

I was bored today, too ... I don't come over to hang out with the Bulls often. I'm glad I did today, I needed a good laugh.

Of course I won't shoot you lol.. I just don't agree with that.. He is a very straight forward man.. If he doesn't want something he says it and he said that he wanted me in the text.. I know him and our relationship so I guess I'm looking at it all from a different perspective.. That was his first time stating that he thinks he may be in love with me which definitely stood out because his actions always showed that.. He also said he sees a future with me.. I don't see him as a man who would lie to lead me on its just no his character from what I've seen.. But I guess I'll just have to wait and see how this plays out.. As far as us getting married we've talked about kids and marriage and we bother agreed that waiting a few years would be best.. When I speak of those things I'm speaking years from now.. Not tomorrow

Posted by P-Angel

Posted by TheCancerGirl

I left a 4 year relationship myself ..

Let me guess ..... you were fucking this guy before you left that 4 year relationship. What other reason is there to use it as justification otherwise?

So, you cheated on another man to be with this one .... lol

I was bored today, too ... I don't come over to hang out with the Bulls often. I'm glad I did today, I needed a good laugh.

click to expand

No of course not I had not met him until after it ended

Posted by TheCancerGirl

he said that he wanted me in the text.

a text !


And we see below that you make sure to talk to him about marriage.

"As far as us getting married we've talked about kids and marriage and we bother agreed that waiting a few years would be best.. When I speak of those things I'm speaking years from now.. Not tomorrow"


lol

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by TheCancerGirl
Well he treats me like a queen. And he's my King. He makes sure I've never wanted for anything.. He's met my family and I've talked to his parents.. We have traveled together and we make each other happy so... Call it what you want I don't really care about your statements all I care about is him and our happiness.. I'm not a jealous person I never felt threatened about his ex I left a 4 year relationship myself .. All I am concerned with is being there for him during this time the way I should be I'm sorry if you don't have a person who cares that much about you to put in work to make sure the relationship last!

Now you are being "defensive " in a nasty "catty"... Another reason why I had to terminate my friendship with a cancer gf.

Are you here for advice or just advice that suits your pallette?

click to expand

So if someone comes to my post talking crazy I can't defend myself?

What was the point here?? I'm just filling you in!!

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by TheCancerGirl
Well he treats me like a queen. And he's my King. He makes sure I've never wanted for anything.. He's met my family and I've talked to his parents.. We have traveled together and we make each other happy so... Call it what you want I don't really care about your statements all I care about is him and our happiness.. I'm not a jealous person I never felt threatened about his ex I left a 4 year relationship myself .. All I am concerned with is being there for him during this time the way I should be I'm sorry if you don't have a person who cares that much about you to put in work to make sure the relationship last!

Now you are being "defensive " in a nasty "catty"... Another reason why I had to terminate my friendship with a cancer gf.

Are you here for advice or just advice that suits your pallette?

click to expand

I'm open to all advice but this person came to my page with nothing but negativity there is a way to say and do things.. Not to mention on her page she is doing the same thing to multiple people that says a lot about her character.. I accepted all of your advice and will do exactly as you said but I just don't accept anyone talking to me in that way

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by TheCancerGirl

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by TheCancerGirl
Well he treats me like a queen. And he's my King. He makes sure I've never wanted for anything.. He's met my family and I've talked to his parents.. We have traveled together and we make each other happy so... Call it what you want I don't really care about your statements all I care about is him and our happiness.. I'm not a jealous person I never felt threatened about his ex I left a 4 year relationship myself .. All I am concerned with is being there for him during this time the way I should be I'm sorry if you don't have a person who cares that much about you to put in work to make sure the relationship last!

Now you are being "defensive " in a nasty "catty"... Another reason why I had to terminate my friendship with a cancer gf.

Are you here for advice or just advice that suits your pallette?

So if someone comes to my post talking crazy I can't defend myself?

You are not here to make a defence but to take on board what every one has said including stuff you do not want to hear.

Look at the facts from a taurus point of view and look at the reality of the situation from the eyes of the taurus.. Ie look at the present situation from HIS standpoint... I as a taurus have glossed over many things (venus in pisces) but when "reality" of the real circumstances hit me... It was a completely different story!!!!

We are asking you to see the situation from HIS eyes and not your own!!! Taurus will always see the reality...

click to expand

After reading it all I do see much more clearly.. This board has helped me so much I'm good now I'll wait it out sand when he decides to reach out I will be here no doubt. So I guess we just have to wait and see

Ok

I might get hurt.. I don't think it's not possible I'm just being optimistic.. I'll take him at his word but it's definitely possible.. Donna

OP - I would just take him at his word and not let all the negative speculation creep in and make you paranoid. If he's truly not ready for a relationship, he needs to be honest and say that. What he's told you so far seems just to be that he is going to need a little space to tie things up. I would take him at his word....If he said he was going to cut off all communication I'd be worried, but it doesn't sound like he is. Sounds more like he is just letting you know its going to be less for the time being.

All of what you just said is valid Busy and I have made up my mind to not communicate and just live the way I wish before him.. Of course he will be on my mind but I won't be happy if I focus on this for the next 3 months.. I'll just travel, sing, perform and enjoy life.. Either he will come back to me or he will not either way I have not control in this situation.

I agree.. I trust him a lot he has never went against his word before so I'm just going to trust what he has told me.. And try to be optimistic after all he said he thinks he loves me and that is huge for him.. we will all know what the end result is because I will come right back here and tell the world!!! Lol thank you for being positive it is much needed

I'll keep everyone posted and we will all hope for the best.. Donna what you just said was very sweet thank you so much for your well wishes and Busy you are always filled with amazing insight.. I'll live a little and please believe when I know something you guys will be updated lol

Hi OP, I am in similar situation.

My T man asked for some time since he s going through a very difficult phase, he is on the blink of bankrupticy and he can't deal with a relationship right now. His work and business is his whole identity and he works extremely hard. He doesn't need any distractions or pressure at the moment. We also have a LDR.

However he told me about this by phone call. I wished he had sent a message to be honest, I hate having to rely on my memory.
Anyway, he also told me that although he would himself slow down his communication I could call or contact him whenever I needed. Which I used to do - not as much as before - but still checked in now and then because I was very worried about him.

Anyway, it has been a very confusing time. Pretty much every day I change my mind about what he means and I go through a lot of emotions and feelings…It has been great of self discovery, self growth and self understanding.

The reason why I change my mind about what he meant is because I know that some men will use whatever excuse they can to get rid of a woman instead of breaking up with them properly…BUT what makes me keep hanging is that my T man lives in another country and could easily have faded away with no explanation what so ever. He took the time to reassure me ad he has always being very straight forward and honest, he never lies as far as I know…after we had 'that' conversation, he messaged me saying he misses me, looks forward to see me in the future, etc…I don't think he would be so evil to do it on purpose just to fuck with my heart. At least I hope.

So, because I am a loving positive woman I decided to believe in his word and let him be. Meanwhile I am living my life the best I can. I am investing on my emotional maturity and my intellect. I am catching up with projects and exploring new ideas to keep my mind busy. When he comes back / if he comes back, I will respond whatever way I am feeling on the particular moment. I can't plan what I will be feeling in the future. The future doesn't exist anyway. Live in the present.

It has been hard. Today is the 7th day of no contact. I have been crying to sleep a few nights. But whenever I feel sad I immediately do something good to myself, I am practising self care. It could be a food treat, a long bath with luxurious salts, a purchase, whatever…

I am not a serial dater and I despise the whole dating game. I am not looking for anybody at the moment. But if someone comes along making me feel connected and curious I will date again. I am a very hard person to click romantically but when I do I know it is special, so I will carry on as a single since T man is not committed to me.

Stay in the present.

Wow! I am amazed at the similarities of both of our situations. I am just on day 3 and this is seriously hard for me. He has always been so honest and open with me as well and the last message he sent me was filled with so much reassurance that I can't help but to have faith in us. The circumstances may be hard to conquer but I honestly believe in what we have.

I have cried like a new born child since I received the message and now I just have to live without him.. I have so much that I can be doing but somehow when I begin it all reminds me of him. When we were talking i got I miss you test and calls all day long so I'm sure this is hard for him as well. So I just have o be selfless and put his needs before my wants.

I am open to dating as well but he will be a tough act to follow..

So Goldfish, I guess you and I both have some more work to do on ourselves and I have faith that they both will be back sooner than later. At least we see that pulling away when they have a dilemma is just one of the Taurus qualities. And i am so happy that they both decided to at least inform us of this instead of just disappearing which Taurus are known to do.. Knowing this speaks volumes.

I am holding on to a few things that my Taurus said:
- I really thinks there is a future for me & you
- I can almost say I think I love you
- I can be yours after

Those 3 things say a lot to me because he has never said those things before.. Before he only showed me with with his actions that he cared but for him to actually say all this was major. He has always has such a tough time expressing the way he feels this entire time so for him to write all that I was like WOW. I usually only get a quick 2 sentence text but that last message was 2 paragraphs.

I hope that your guys gave you enough reassurance to hold on to. I believe in love and the power it holds and I pray that he comes back and holds on to you for eternity. You deserve it!

gf, you are crying yourself to sleep over guy that lives in another country, has made no commitment to you and doesn't talk to you. if i remember correctly you said he was overweight and you didn't find him attractive while you yourself has lots of attention from people who find you sexy.

what are you doing— there are lots of other men in the world! even if there weren't this one is not good enough to shed tears over! what you are really crying over is not him but the loss of the idea of him. that's great news because it means your situation is mostly self created. you have the opportunity to find that same special something with someone else. stop crying over a guy like he was the last biscuit in the tin.

Posted by jeane
gf, you are crying yourself to sleep over guy that lives in another country, has made no commitment to you and doesn't talk to you. if i remember correctly you said he was overweight and you didn't find him attractive while you yourself has lots of attention from people who find you sexy.

You're ugly

Posted by Montgomery

Posted by jeane
gf, you are crying yourself to sleep over guy that lives in another country, has made no commitment to you and doesn't talk to you. if i remember correctly you said he was overweight and you didn't find him attractive while you yourself has lots of attention from people who find you sexy.

You're ugly

click to expand

many thanks! 😎

Posted by jeane

Posted by Montgomery

Posted by jeane
gf, you are crying yourself to sleep over guy that lives in another country, has made no commitment to you and doesn't talk to you. if i remember correctly you said he was overweight and you didn't find him attractive while you yourself has lots of attention from people who find you sexy.

You're ugly

many thanks! 😎

click to expand

You bet.

I have more in reserve that you can look forward to, as well.

i think this guy really cares about you, i mean REALLY cares about you. you will have to b PATIENT! Someone whos just getting divorced has their feelings all over the place.. just keep communication open, maybe a couple of times a week so he knows you still care. My advice to you is to this relationship is going to take some time because of the divorce. Be prepared...

Thank you @SweetNSexyBull that I truly what I feel.. I believe he cares deeply for me because he expressed so much in that message which is extremely hard for him to do.. Usually he can't even get it out.. I said this before but I am willing to do whatever it takes.. I will work on myself and be patient because I care just as much for him.

I've received so many different responses in the communication issue and he never said if we should stop talking completely so I had a lot of confusion in that area.

Posted by TheCancerGirl

I believe he cares deeply for me because he expressed so much in that message .....

That's the second time you said that this new news of how he feels came from a text ... NOW.

So, all along for those 5 months, he never said the words to you. Now that he's pulled away, he says them to you to keep you on the end of the string.

You base all of this on how he feels ... yet, all of these feels are from a text he just sent since he's been gone.

And both times you used the excuse that it's hard for him to express his feelings ..... when the reality is, you don't know what is hard for him. You just say that as an excuse to tell yourself for him not telling you how he feels.

So, that means ... he was NOT sharing his feelings with you all along. And only now, as you're dangling, he tells you.


Are you seriously this stupid?

Posted by jeane
gf, you are crying yourself to sleep over guy that lives in another country, has made no commitment to you and doesn't talk to you. if i remember correctly you said he was overweight and you didn't find him attractive while you yourself has lots of attention from people who find you sexy.

what are you doing— there are lots of other men in the world! even if there weren't this one is not good enough to shed tears over! what you are really crying over is not him but the loss of the idea of him. that's great news because it means your situation is mostly self created. you have the opportunity to find that same special something with someone else. stop crying over a guy like he was the last biscuit in the tin.

What? I'm super attracted to him despite his weight. This is real conection.
Yes I do cry. It is sad. He lives abroad. I have no money to fly there and he can't fly me there or fly to me anymore. He is having financial problems.
Growth hurts. I've grown a lot since meeting him and going through this. I am also lonely sometimes. That is why I cry.
I invested a lot emotionally.
But even if this doesn't work out, I will come out a better person on the other side so it is valid. Whatever outcome is positive.
Crying is healing. Tears heal. I'm not ashamed. I have lots of insights after crying. It means I got in touch with the real me under all the layers.
It is raw.

Posted by Goldfish

Posted by jeane
gf, you are crying yourself to sleep over guy that lives in another country, has made no commitment to you and doesn't talk to you. if i remember correctly you said he was overweight and you didn't find him attractive while you yourself has lots of attention from people who find you sexy.

what are you doing— there are lots of other men in the world! even if there weren't this one is not good enough to shed tears over! what you are really crying over is not him but the loss of the idea of him. that's great news because it means your situation is mostly self created. you have the opportunity to find that same special something with someone else. stop crying over a guy like he was the last biscuit in the tin.

What? I'm super attracted to him despite his weight. This is real conection.
Yes I do cry. It is sad. He lives abroad. I have no money to fly there and he can't fly me there or fly to me anymore. He is having financial problems.
Growth hurts. I've grown a lot since meeting him and going through this. I am also lonely sometimes. That is why I cry.
I invested a lot emotionally.
But even if this doesn't work out, I will come out a better person on the other side so it is valid. Whatever outcome is positive.
Crying is healing. Tears heal. I'm not ashamed. I have lots of insights after crying. It means I got in touch with the real me under all the layers.
It is raw.

click to expand

ok. apologies. i thought i remember you writing that you didn't fancy him that much. it might have been someone else.

unnecessary crying is not healing. you don't need to be unhappy in order to earn happiness. if you are crying your body is telling you things are not as they should be. you life is short. everyone's life is short. in a blink of an eye it will be over. don't spend any more days of your life crying than you need to.

you can be happy and still grow. these things are not mutually exclusive. i just wish you would look around you and see the potential you have right in front of you now instead of pining over a guy miles away from you who hasn't even promised you 'one day'.

i think one day you'll look back and think why the fuck did i waste all that time? life is now. life is today. go out. be happy. live your life.

Posted by jeane

Posted by Goldfish

Posted by jeane
gf, you are crying yourself to sleep over guy that lives in another country, has made no commitment to you and doesn't talk to you. if i remember correctly you said he was overweight and you didn't find him attractive while you yourself has lots of attention from people who find you sexy.

what are you doing— there are lots of other men in the world! even if there weren't this one is not good enough to shed tears over! what you are really crying over is not him but the loss of the idea of him. that's great news because it means your situation is mostly self created. you have the opportunity to find that same special something with someone else. stop crying over a guy like he was the last biscuit in the tin.

What? I'm super attracted to him despite his weight. This is real conection.
Yes I do cry. It is sad. He lives abroad. I have no money to fly there and he can't fly me there or fly to me anymore. He is having financial problems.
Growth hurts. I've grown a lot since meeting him and going through this. I am also lonely sometimes. That is why I cry.
I invested a lot emotionally.
But even if this doesn't work out, I will come out a better person on the other side so it is valid. Whatever outcome is positive.
Crying is healing. Tears heal. I'm not ashamed. I have lots of insights after crying. It means I got in touch with the real me under all the layers.
It is raw.

ok. apologies. i thought i remember you writing that you didn't fancy him that much. it might have been someone else.

unnecessary crying is not healing. you don't need to be unhappy in order to earn happiness. if you are crying your body is telling you things are not as they should be. you life is short. everyone's life is short. in a blink of an eye it will be over. don't spend any more days of your life crying than you need to.

you can be happy and still grow. these things are not mutually exclusive. i just wish you would look around you and see the potential you have right
in front of you now instead of pining over a guy miles away from you who hasn't even promised you 'one day'.

i think one day you'll look back and
think why the fuck did i waste all that time? life is now. life is today. go out. be happy. live your life.

click to expand

Thank you dear. You have a very valid point. Note I said I cry 'sometimes'.
Yep! Live in the present, enjoy and be happy NOW.
Future is illusion.

He has told me plenty of times that's he is falling for me but to actually say I love you that was a first.. Would you like for me to just upload the text so you can have a better undstanding I'm doing my best to explain it all but its 5 months of interaction and hard to explain.

I said it's hard for him because I can tell when he talks to me about his emotions he gets nervous and stumbles over his words he can barely can get what he's saying to me out and eventually he just says that he's falling for me or he will say Ive never cared for someone so much this fast.. It's not an excuse I can just tell by how he attempts to tell me what he feels and then fails miserably.. I could tell it was hard for him to express his emotions and I was grateful he puts in the effort because I've read that most Taurus just check out emotionally
...

I can tell it's not long to him because he always says he's never cared about someone so fast.. I actually don't think it's that long myself we've just have a lot of experiences together in a short time.. But we will all see how this thing plays out

Cancer Girl.
Also keep in mind that we as human beings are changing every day. You are not the same you were yesterday. Tomorrow you won't be the same you are today. Unless you go about your life learning nothing.

He might have meant what he said but it doesn't mean his feelings won't change. Same with you. Specially since communication is suffering, conection is suffering and the r'ship is not evolving.

Me, if my T man comes back, we will to re - set and start again. If I decide he deserves one more chance. If I'm still available. If I still have feelings for him. If there is still a strong conection and attraction between us.

I will make him wait for sex and prove himself all over again. It's all about trust.

Stay in the now.

Posted by Koniucha
He really needs to tell you in person that he loves you. Text is pretty meaningless.

I am in ATL he is in Florida we were flying back and forward by weekly until recently so it may have been a while before I could see him..

Posted by Goldfish
Cancer Girl.
Also keep in mind that we as human beings are changing every day. You are not the same you were yesterday. Tomorrow you won't be the same you are today. Unless you go about your life learning nothing.

He might have meant what he said but it doesn't mean his feelings won't change. Same with you. Specially since communication is suffering, conection is suffering and the r'ship is not evolving.

Me, if my T man comes back, we will to re - set and start again. If I decide he deserves one more chance. If I'm still available. If I still have feelings for him. If there is still a strong conection and attraction between us.

I will make him wait for sex and prove himself all over again. It's all about trust.

Stay in the now.

For sure as the days pass I am becoming stronger and starting to see things more clearly.. I won't say if but when he comes back he will have some work to do.. Because I will be a little resentful towards him I am sure of it.. I have never experienced anything like this before but I guess this is a perk of being with a Taurus.. From this point I am going to take his word for what it is and if he doesn't follow thru it will be 100 percent his loss..

I still trust what he says until he proves me wrong but until then I'll be living life!!

Posted by busyeyes88
She is a pisces with moon in pisces Libraus. That's how water signs heal!!! Air people cope with it differently. I have venus and Saturn in pisces and know exactly where she is coming from!!! She has to heal.in her own way! 😄

you're right busy but would you cry over a guy that has offered you so very little? i'm no stranger to crying (keep in mind i have a watery venus) but shit, my tears are reserved for the tangible.

my point is there is little to heal from! i understand she is disappointed and that sucks. i can appreciate she might think it is unfair. it is. she might feel that all is lost. i want her to believe that it is not. there is much to rejoice in. she has so much potential in her life but there are hundreds of opportunities that are going to pass her while she is focusing on him. it's not been a week, a fortnight, it's been months. i'm just encouraging her to pick herself up and try to summon up the excitement for her life.

gf's last message indicates she is getting there. i'm happy for her.

Posted by busyeyes88

Posted by TheCancerGirl

Posted by Goldfish
Cancer Girl.
Also keep in mind that we as human beings are changing every day. You are not the same you were yesterday. Tomorrow you won't be the same you are today. Unless you go about your life learning nothing.

He might have meant what he said but it doesn't mean his feelings won't change. Same with you. Specially since communication is suffering, conection is suffering and the r'ship is not evolving.

Me, if my T man comes back, we will to re - set and start again. If I decide he deserves one more chance. If I'm still available. If I still have feelings for him. If there is still a strong conection and attraction between us.

I will make him wait for sex and prove himself all over again. It's all about trust.

Stay in the now.

For sure as the days pass I am becoming stronger and starting to see things more clearly.. I won't say if but when he comes back he will have some work to do.. Because I will be a little resentful towards him I am sure of it.. I have never experienced anything like this before but I guess this is a perk of being with a Taurus.. From this point I am going to take his word for what it is and if he doesn't follow thru it will be 100 percent his loss..

I still trust what he says until he proves me wrong but until then I'll be living life!!

"Resentment " for what?

That's not a good start for any kind of relationship is it?

click to expand

You are right it's not but right now I'm feeling that way because this situation is so hard.. And he opted to put me through this I still believe in us but we will have so much work to do when this is over.

When I originally heard him say he was divorced it was the first night I met him.. It was in a group setting and my friend asked him if he was single and he said he was divorced I obviously was listening to all that was said.. So when he leaned in to tell me I was beautiful I was all ears.. I even put huge passion marks all over him once and he didn't care at all he said the person that put them there is the only person who mattered so that was confirmation enough.

I never brought it up again because I heard him the first time but at some point he laid it all out to me and he said that it was completely over for sure and that he would never forgive her and go back.. We talked for hours and he kept it real with me she betrayed his trust and now it's too late.. He even cried.. Listening to him pour his heart out made me want to just be there for him. His honesty made me feel closer to him than i did before.. Because he was opening up to me. And since I decided to continue I know that I do have to take some of the blame for this situation.

Overall it's super hard for me.. Because this man calls me when he wakes up when he's at his office when he's on his way home and when he goes to sleep it's hard as hell to not see that name pop up. When our day to day was so predictable. But I've accepted this whole situation now. It is what it is the ball is in his court and out of my control I'm just gone do me and if everything he has expressed to me is real then he will be back

Thank you Donna I appreciate you kind words to me.. I am doing my best to just move forward and I will post to keep you posted on everything I think we should all see how this ends.. Everyone's advice has helped a lot

Posted by DonnaElvira77

Posted by TheCancerGirl
Thank you Donna I appreciate you kind words to me.. I am doing my best to just move forward and I will post to keep you posted on everything I think we should all see how this ends.. Everyone's advice has helped a lot

Sorry I didn't see this before i had written my other post. I don't want to seem like I am beating you over the head with it. Anyway just from the way you write etc. I think you are a really amazing person. You should think of writing by the way :-)

click to expand

Thank you he actually told me the same thing that I am good with words I have been writing every day to take my mind away from all of this and I don't think you are beating me lol i can tell you have my best interest in mind even though you don't know me you can tell that my heart is very genuine and I am grateful for that.

Posted by ShadowAbsorber
70 days is a long time, but give your Taurus the space and time he asked for. Trust me on this one, Taurans like to take things to completion at a natural pace - they like to do things the right way. So ending his divorce and giving this time to his child is his way of giving each thing the respect & closure they deserve. Show him that you're understanding of this, and in the long-run, he'll realize even more that you have a special connection with him, because you understood deep down and supported him. I'm sure he's missing you. Let him end these chapters naturally and let him give them the time to do it wholeheartedly and completely. At the end of it, he'll be even more ready to be all yours. There's an emotional understanding between Taurus and Cancer, and you seem like a mature one. 🙂

OMG you just spoke to my soul because that was my initial understand from his message.. And I was okay with that because I want him to get whatever he needs to do done and I don't want to be a distraction.. I believe him when he says that he will be mine because he has always shown me that he wants it with his actions which means more to me than any words can speak.

The amount of time is what lead me to write this whole thing and all the different opinions have some how confused me but even after I read every opinion I remember the amazing moment that he and I have shared I remember how he holds me and I feel so safe and remember that there is no other person that I have had the feeling with before and because of that I will wait.. I will give him the respect he deserves and I will follow the other advice to live for myself until that day comes...

@OP- How in your right mind can you be so attached to these words he's spouting. Actions are clearer but he's not acting anything like that towards you. If a guy is going to be all in he is. If a guy is going through a divorce you aren't a priority. So the five month time line is out the door. You're still hanging if he ever gets back with her for the kids sake. Your fucked. And left hanging. Or you move on and find someone available. He's not. He's going through something painful. Your a side piece. Nothing more.

Why are you still talking about it. It's nauseating to see you haven't learned your lesson. You haven't even been in his shoes yet. So just be friends though.

And if it was any other person you would bounce. Cause you have respect, morals, values, and integrity for yourself. And you are not doing any of those important aspects. Hanging on some dude is lowering your standards and you'll find it isn't worth the insanity of losing yourself for a dude that's currently in the process of divorce that's not even finalized.

Posted by jeane

Posted by busyeyes88
She is a pisces with moon in pisces Libraus. That's how water signs heal!!! Air people cope with it differently. I have venus and Saturn in pisces and know exactly where she is coming from!!! She has to heal.in her own way! 😄

you're right busy but would you cry over a guy that has offered you so very little? i'm no stranger to crying (keep in mind i have a watery venus) but shit, my tears are reserved for the tangible.

my point is there is little to heal from! i understand she is disappointed and that sucks. i can appreciate she might think it is unfair. it is. she might feel that all is lost. i want her to believe that it is not. there is much to rejoice in. she has so much potential in her life but there are hundreds of opportunities that are going to pass her while she is focusing on him. it's not been a week, a fortnight, it's been months. i'm just encouraging her to pick herself up and try to summon up the excitement for her life.

gf's last message indicates she is getting there. i'm happy for her.

click to expand

Busy is 100 % right, crying is how water people are dealing with lost hopes and lost imagined potential....... crying is terapeutic for water signs..... like sports or meeting new people or take up a new hobby......... some people are getting on life actively (sport, hobby) some people passively (crying) but the result is the same, just the method is different how to get there....

crying doesnt necessarily means wallowing in depression, it is just expressing.......... the "euphoria" and better feelings after crying is the same as euphoria after excercising or a good night out 🙂
as I said, crying is terapeutic and very comforting........ I wish I could cry more, like when I was younger, it was a bliss and a much needed releif and the best way to move forward 🙂

Posted by Pandora101

Posted by jeane

Posted by busyeyes88
She is a pisces with moon in pisces Libraus. That's how water signs heal!!! Air people cope with it differently. I have venus and Saturn in pisces and know exactly where she is coming from!!! She has to heal.in her own way! 😄

you're right busy but would you cry over a guy that has offered you so very little? i'm no stranger to crying (keep in mind i have a watery venus) but shit, my tears are reserved for the tangible.

my point is there is little to heal from! i understand she is disappointed and that sucks. i can appreciate she might think it is unfair. it is. she might feel that all is lost. i want her to believe that it is not. there is much to rejoice in. she has so much potential in her life but there are hundreds of opportunities that are going to pass her while she is focusing on him. it's not been a week, a fortnight, it's been months. i'm just encouraging her to pick herself up and try to summon up the excitement for her life.

gf's last message indicates she is getting there. i'm happy for her.

Busy is 100 % right, crying is how water people are dealing with lost hopes and lost imagined potential....... crying is terapeutic for water signs..... like sports or meeting new people or take up a new hobby......... some people are getting on life actively (sport, hobby) some people passively (crying) but the result is the same, just the method is different how to get there....

crying doesnt necessarily means wallowing in depression, it is just expressing.......... the "euphoria" and better feelings after crying is the same as euphoria after excercising or a good night out 🙂
as I said, crying is terapeutic and very comforting........ I wish I could cry more, like when I was younger, it was a bliss and a much needed releif and the best way to move forward 🙂

click to expand

crying just washes away all toxic feelings, all frustration and resentment..... and after this dream on again, which is essential for pisces placements🙂 water people (especially pisces) can not live without dreaming, it is an essential part of their personality....... bad or good, it is a fact......

I don't always agree with Busy but I do respect her views & sometimes she's dead on point! People deal with different situations differently..."crying" for example is water signs way of healing themselves internally and starting over fresh. And as Pandora stated afterwards...doesn't necessarily mean "wallowing in depression". "Allowance" is a huggggeeeee part of showing sympathy & understanding of how others deal with similar situations differently.
As for OP, it would benefit her tremendously to use her "Cancer shell" to her advantage in this situation, I know I do mine having a Cancer moon & rising. The traits that we all have that are our weaknessess can also be our "strengths" and used to our advantage. When men in general tell you who they are and what they want outright....u best believe they mean it. You can't control their emotions/actions...but you dam well can control your own and respond in kind by using whatever is in your personality arsenal to your advantage...and for OP that would be her Cancer shell to retreat and regroup by occupying her time with other things...which from what I gather from her posts...thats what she intends on doing. In this case, it would serve her well in the end no matter the outcome.

you guys have missed my point but ok.

Most people miss most points in dxp.

It's like they have a thought, and off they go .... mindlessly a lot of times.

I can't believe that there are that many people telling her to wait on the end of this string, so to be available to eagerly jump at whatever crumbs he decides to throw to her.

He used her for rebound ... now you all are telling her it's ok.


it's rather disgusting, tbh

Posted by jeane
you guys have missed my point but ok.

I got your point and the other's point too.

Posted by jeane
you guys have missed my point but ok.

Yeah, I think we focused maybe too much on the "crying" part..... but only to elaborate, how it is a way to getting on with life..... I dont think Goldfish was crying over this man alone, what he was, but its her way how to deal with her emotions and her dreams about this man..... not necessarily who he is or what was happening, but maybe her dreams about him? If the man is not worthy, it doesnt mean we can not love the potential in him........ and this potential in him is sometimes a projection, what we hoped for......... so, crying is a way to deal with our own dreams about the man, not what he deserves or what was going on

you wanted Goldfish to get on with her life, and she is doing it, by her own method


As to the OP, it was very irresponsible of her man to state he is divorced and let her believe it for some time........ He behaved very selfishly........ the thing is, if the marriage/relationship is over emotionally beforehand, there is no confusion with the divorce/break up.....no need for time.... you can fall in love and have another relationship, it is proved by countless examples, where divorced people go happily into another fulfilling relationship......... if there is a confusion, then its not over, so stay away........ taurus or not

I'm really curious what's going to happen because I'm going through something SIMILAR with a Cancer man .. he's in the middle of a big change in his life , kid and money in the middle with his ex..
Same passion for each other , big plans and big words . Well , is been already 3 months I didn't see him due to problems that keep poppin up . In his case it's a big business in the middle and lawyers involved that he can basically win the battle , plus the process of custody . He wrote me last " baby I miss u so much , and the happiness to be with u . I have a lot of poison in my life at the moment , I know u hate me a little bit I just want to keep u safe , Merry Christmas".
I lost my faith and I'm already moving on .
I hope in Ur case will be 70 days as u may think but I doubt .. it depends of the gravity .
As per myself I'm not going to waste my time waiting any longer.. life goes on and if is made to be it will..

HE CAME BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay guys I know this has been such a long debate and everyone has had very different opinions and I wanted to let you guys know that I woke up to the most amazing voice a voice that I have missed incredibly for the past week.. He expressed from his heart that he officially loves me and wants to be with me. That was music to my ears. He expressed that he missed me so much every single day but he needed to fight his own battles on his own.

I did a lot of what you guys recommended and let him know that from this point I will also be focusing more on myself because this experience has shown me that I lost myself somewhere in between. I now know that he truly does love me and was never going anywhere and that I can trust when he gives me his word.

Since the divorce is still not final I want to wait on us officially committing to each other and I expressed that as well. I'm not sure who recommended this but I took your advice thank you.

So from this point I feel closer to him than ever before we have an understanding and I know where his heart is and thats with him.. I will allow him to pursue me from now on and for him to miss ME a little. The cards are now in my hands!!!

Thank you to everyone who has had great advice it helped me get through this. I am so super happy that man couldn't go any longer without me because it was a real challenge. We were experiencing the same withdrawals which is a good feeling. I hope that this helps the other two women with similar situations see that there is HOPE.. And also anyone in the future who is experiencing this. Be positive because the law of attraction is real.

I also had hope in me and him because I knew that his heart was genuine and I am so happy to have him back in my life. Follow your intuition people. People may have opinions but you know in your heart if someone is true or not.
- TheCancerGirl

Always nice to hear a good outcome.
Now you can relax and get on with your life until his mess is sorted and it's time to be officially together.
Take care.