Sorry for the short replies. I'm getting tired...missed nap time today lol
Think I pushed my Taurus away, need advice (Page 3)
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Posted by biosynthesis
once a Taurus has made his/her mind, that's it. Game over.
Not really....Everyone says this but I know a lot of bulls and its just not so. Really though what we have here is a bluffing Taurus. We dont know that his mind *IS* actually made up.
Further, all bets are off with certain types of chemistry. Scorpios are supposed to be this way too, but I have talked to SO many caught up in the magnetic pull of opposites and they say over and over - i tried to get away, i wouldnt tolerate this from anyone else, I said I was done, but still cant stay away. You can find such statements on this board right now.
Lastly, this is a Venus in Gemini bull. In love, his mind is possibly never made up.
He is a Taurus Sun and Moon. If he really has strong feelings, he will have possibly the hardest time letting go or getting over someone than anyone. And the Moon opp. Sun and Moon opp. Moon - particilarly with Scorp/Taurus axis in both instances - could be causing some really strong chemistry/feelings. Seems like some pretty extreme jealousy/anger/desperation coming into play very early, which is indicative of that.
Initially on it's face one thought came to mind reading OP's post, Hang the bitch! Off to the Gallows!
However, upon further reading, it sounds to be a case of two people who don't know what they want. I'd really love to get the other half's aspect and viewpoint but that's impossible. So my advice would be to cut the chord and move on. I'd offer a more detailed reply, except it would be brutal and quite icy. So I leave it at that!
However, upon further reading, it sounds to be a case of two people who don't know what they want. I'd really love to get the other half's aspect and viewpoint but that's impossible. So my advice would be to cut the chord and move on. I'd offer a more detailed reply, except it would be brutal and quite icy. So I leave it at that!
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpioPosted by biosynthesis
once a Taurus has made his/her mind, that's it. Game over.
Not really....Everyone says this but I know a lot of bulls and its just not so. Really though what we have here is a bluffing Taurus. We dont know that his mind *IS* actually made up.
Further, all bets are off with certain types of chemistry. Scorpios are supposed to be this way too, but I have talked to SO many caught up in the magnetic pull of opposites and they say over and over - i tried to get away, i wouldnt tolerate this from anyone else, I said I was done, but still cant stay away. You can find such statements on this board right now.
Lastly, this is a Venus in Gemini bull. In love, his mind is possibly never made up.click to expand
yeah I guess a venus in gem would be a bit different. my venus in taurus makes me pretty clear with what I want- I have a zero tolerance policy. Sun AND venus in taurus= stubborn af 😛
Posted by AnomalousBull
Initially on it's face one thought came to mind reading OP's post, Hang the bitch! Off to the Gallows!
Pardon this bit, I realize now after reading it that it was a tad intense. It's probably my Mars in Scorpio, the fact a Leo wronged me or both.
Hey,
Just dont loose heart..he'll come back to you, meanwhile just keep doing your own thing, be busy and most importantly have patience and dont try to push things..
Just dont loose heart..he'll come back to you, meanwhile just keep doing your own thing, be busy and most importantly have patience and dont try to push things..
Posted by tiziani
Damn @ infinites Taurus and Leo story.
I don't know what it is about this pairing that seems to make Leo women impatient and completely lose boundaries.
Broke up with a Taurus in July another one found me last month. I am no expert but this is what I think.
As a Leo woman I am very use to men finding me attractive and trying to do anything to get my attention.
Taurus men seem to have this "you're ok but there are millions of you" attitude that we just don't understand. It's an enigma to us. We have a difficult time understanding why we, THE SUN is not the center of your life.
It's ok we all have our good and bad. For all the self centeredness that we harbor you will be hard pressed to find a Leo that will not be loyal once you commit.
The pairing can work . Quite a few Tauri have Leo and Gemini parts and many Leos have Cancer and Virgos bits.
Posted by Hotbeefy
Alright since I had enough being silent and kind, after you are going to talk bad shit about him for making you a good guy.. let me tell you this.
You just got out of 4 years relationship in October and already accepted relationship at November. I bet he knows this BEFORE you started relationship at Nov with him(& even met him while having relationship with your ex-bf).. It's so weird that you accepted already in relationship after a months being single. PLUS since you are the one saying that you started playing games. This playing games is big turned off for Taurus (and mostly mature men) since they want stability in relationship and not teenage relationships.
Yes his biggest mistakes is asking you about your ex, but it's because he knows you had a relationship back then and broke up on OCT.
Beside, what he's doing is more possession than jealousy, especially that you handed out the phone number towards that guy! Do you have any idea what body language you are doing? He though it could be more between you guys, but unfortunately it sounds like he knew something up that he's testing you if you are trustworthy or not. It seems that you sounds like you're not taken relationship seriously even that you claimed that you are into relationship as he wants serious commitment relationship. Hence he gave you the hint 'This is not exclusive relationship'.
No matter that he did started to say for not into serious relationship, he did told you lateron that there's something more between you that he though for started into serious relationship.
Two days before he randomly threw it in my face that we weren't exclusive and then adding insult to injury told me he didn't want me to get jealous of other girls. So to me that screamed that he was not trying to get serious even though two weeks before HE was the one that said it could be more so I thought that he was back tracking. I did not see it as a test but rather him saying he still wanted to play the field. I should not be at fault for that, if anything he should. You don't say that to someone you supposedly want to get serious with. Once he put that out there at took that as a cue to do my own thing. How else could I take it after he said that? As far as him being worried my ex that is normal, even though he claims he doesn't care. The issue I have with that is he wants to look at my phone and e
^^ sorry keeps getting caught off lol
*and even wanted me to take a picture of us together and send it to my ex, though I can't decide if he was joking or not. To me these things are just odd and is very passive. I wish he would just ask me about my ex directly instead.
*and even wanted me to take a picture of us together and send it to my ex, though I can't decide if he was joking or not. To me these things are just odd and is very passive. I wish he would just ask me about my ex directly instead.
Typical Leo, ugh.
*Pulls hair out*
*Pulls hair out*
Posted by Hotbeefy
Sounds like you still hangs out with your ex, right?
Yes, but I don't want anything with him. So even though he swears up and down that he doesn't care about my ex it you think it does bother him?
Posted by AnomalousBull
Typical Leo, ugh.
*Pulls hair out*
Uh oh lol. How is this "typical Leo"? I'm always up for learning more about my flaws
Posted by jebrooks1988Posted by AnomalousBull
Typical Leo, ugh.
*Pulls hair out*
Uh oh lol. How is this "typical Leo"? I'm always up for learning more about my flaws
Posted by jebrooks1988Posted by AnomalousBull
Typical Leo, ugh.
*Pulls hair out*
Uh oh lol. How is this "typical Leo"? I'm always up for learning more about my flawsclick to expand
It doesn't matter, you are incapable of changing or seeing the error of your ways as it's everyone else ' fault except yours. My particular points would be lost upon you. Push? I hope he ran away, far, far away. Nothing good can come of this Union.
Posted by AnomalousBullPosted by jebrooks1988Posted by AnomalousBull
Typical Leo, ugh.
*Pulls hair out*
Uh oh lol. How is this "typical Leo"? I'm always up for learning more about my flaws
Posted by jebrooks1988Posted by AnomalousBull
Typical Leo, ugh.
*Pulls hair out*
Uh oh lol. How is this "typical Leo"? I'm always up for learning more about my flaws
It doesn't matter, you are incapable of changing or seeing the error of your ways as it's everyone else ' fault except yours. My particular points would be lost upon you. Push? I hope he ran away, far, far away. Nothing good can come of this Union.click to expand
Well let me as you this, when he told me we weren't exclusive and to not get jealous of other girls if I saw him out how was I supposed to take that?
FYI (random) HotBeefy has almost the exact same chart as my bull...and when I asked him what he thought of this situation (he made an account on here a couple years ago, but isn't a reader lol) he had pretty much the same opinion. Lol
Posted by scorchedearth
what you don't seem to understand is he was testing you. and you failed. he wanted to see what you would do. and how loyal you are. if you'll be there even if he doesn't seem 100% there yet.
you've proven that not only that he can't trust you but that you'll straight up disrespect him over other guys.
how in the world did you ever think doing what you were doing was a good idea?
you're either emotionally retarded or extremely evil and manipulative.
I honestly didn't know he was testing. I took what he said at face value as I think most people would. I have only slept with 2 other people before him, which he knew. He knew I placed a little more weight on sleeping with someone than most people and as soon as we were done having sex he said all this to me. He even said he may like eating tacos 15 days in a row and might want pizza on the 16th day, what the heck? So I took it as he got what he wanted now he's trying to make it loud and clear that he didn't want to be tied down. He even said if you get jealous you're "out". Again I took everything he said for face value and genuinely thought he didn't want anything from me.
Posted by PVandJellayPosted by jebrooks1988
He said he thought it could be more between us. Last weekend saw him while I was out I completely ignored him and talked to other guys while he was there because we agreed not to get jealous.I was giving my number to another guy and he comes up and said "she's not going to call you bro, she's coming home with me". I said no I'm not and I started to walk away and meanwhile another guy is trying to talk to me and I look back and the guy I like is following me. He gets incredibly angry and says he wants to knock the other guy out, I said but "we're not exclusive like you said remember?" He said I thought we were working towards being exclusive and kept begging me to come home with him, but I said no and went home.*
He called me 4 times, texted me which I all ignored, he asked for me to come over I said no... I didn't hear from all week after that the then tells me we should stop hanging out because he doesn't want to hurt me, this won't ever be more and that we could be just friends with benefits because he's going to continue to see other girls. I am so in shock right now and just hurt and confused. What happened? Is there a way to fix this?
You're shocked?! 😕click to expand
Just going to paste what I said to someone else:
Two days before he randomly threw it in my face that we weren't exclusive and then adding insult to injury told me he didn't want me to get jealous of other girls. So to me that screamed that he was not trying to get serious even though two weeks before HE was the one that said it could be more so I thought that he was back tracking. I did not see it as a test but rather him saying he still wanted to play the field. I should not be at fault for that, if anything he should. You don't say that to someone you supposedly want to get serious with. Once he put that out there at took that as a cue to do my own thing
Posted by jebrooks1988Posted by scorchedearth
so... emotionally retarded is what we're going with, then?
Yes lolclick to expand
LOL!
I think he is at fault for not being straightforward initially. His reaction was also really weak IMO. He should have just left. Looks like you're dealing with a guy who can only be emotionally honest when he's angry. That's not good.
His response to the guy is HILARIOUS though. You gave him your number and he says "She's not going to call you bro." BWAAAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!!! DYING over this. Classic Taurus assertion of ownership, like he is in control of that! LOLOL!
But why were you ignoring the calls after that incident? Refusing to see him? You knew he was upset.
And why were you IGNORING him when out in the first place? How is that not being fake, manipulative, playing games, etc.? I can actually understand talking to other guys if those are the rules he is claiming to play by, but ignoring him? That's just hurtful and fake.
I also don't get a real sense of how you really feel about this guy from any of your writing. I can't really gauge your level of interest; how MUCH do you actually like this guy? That's the most important question - is he worth it in your view?
His response to the guy is HILARIOUS though. You gave him your number and he says "She's not going to call you bro." BWAAAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!!! DYING over this. Classic Taurus assertion of ownership, like he is in control of that! LOLOL!
But why were you ignoring the calls after that incident? Refusing to see him? You knew he was upset.
And why were you IGNORING him when out in the first place? How is that not being fake, manipulative, playing games, etc.? I can actually understand talking to other guys if those are the rules he is claiming to play by, but ignoring him? That's just hurtful and fake.
I also don't get a real sense of how you really feel about this guy from any of your writing. I can't really gauge your level of interest; how MUCH do you actually like this guy? That's the most important question - is he worth it in your view?
Posted by Eris
FYI (random) HotBeefy has almost the exact same chart as my bull...and when I asked him what he thought of this situation (he made an account on here a couple years ago, but isn't a reader lol) he had pretty much the same opinion. Lol
Ask your bull is there a way to get back in his good graces :/
I don't think she's entirely at fault here people.
If Mr Taurus wants to run tests then this is what happens.
Misunderstandings etc.
If he knew she had come out of a four year relationship only a month beforehand then clearly it wasn't an issue for him to initiate something with the Leo.
If he had an issue then he should have stayed away.
If a guy told me he didn't want exclusivity and I wasn't to get jealous/possessive of him with other girls then it would be me running a mile.
Sure, the flirting in his face probably wasn't ideal but if he's not man enough to say what he wants but instead resorts to tests then this is how it goes.
What the hell is she supposed to think or do?
If Mr Taurus wants to run tests then this is what happens.
Misunderstandings etc.
If he knew she had come out of a four year relationship only a month beforehand then clearly it wasn't an issue for him to initiate something with the Leo.
If he had an issue then he should have stayed away.
If a guy told me he didn't want exclusivity and I wasn't to get jealous/possessive of him with other girls then it would be me running a mile.
Sure, the flirting in his face probably wasn't ideal but if he's not man enough to say what he wants but instead resorts to tests then this is how it goes.
What the hell is she supposed to think or do?
Posted by TaurusLovesScorpio
I think he is at fault for not being straightforward initially. His reaction was also really weak IMO. He should have just left. Looks like you're dealing with a guy who can only be emotionally honest when he's angry. That's not good.
His response to the guy is HILARIOUS though. You gave him your number and he says "She's not going to call you bro." BWAAAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!!! DYING over this. Classic Taurus assertion of ownership, like he is in control of that! LOLOL!
But why were you ignoring the calls after that incident? Refusing to see him? You knew he was upset.
And why were you IGNORING him when out in the first place? How is that not being fake, manipulative, playing games, etc.? I can actually understand talking to other guys if those are the rules he is claiming to play by, but ignoring him? That's just hurtful and fake.
I also don't get a real sense of how you really feel about this guy from any of your writing. I can't really gauge your level of interest; how MUCH do you actually like this guy? That's the most important question - is he worth it in your view?
I ignored him bc when he said I just don't want you to her jealous of other girls I took that as when you see me out to just leave him alone that's why I initially didn't speak to him... He asked who I came with, I introduced him to my best friend and he proceeds to tell her, "hey do you know I'm her first white guy" ...ummm ok? FYI I'm his first black girl ever. Then he tries to dance to on my friend, which was gross. Any who I proceeded to ignore his phone calls because I thought he was screwing with me. I ignored his text the next morning because he said "f*ck you" at 8:30 am which I refused to respond to and then hours later he said to come over but I didn't want to after he said f' you. I asked when he said the fwb thing to me if he lied when he said he thought we were working towards being exclusive and he claimed he was "hammered" that night and he said Idk may be. How do you not know if you lied about something? You're so brutally honest about going to "bang" other chicks and only being fwb with me but don't know if you lied or not? Even my friend that I was with said he wasn't drunk, he wasn't stumbling, slurring his words, etc., you can tell when someone is drunk. I don't know he just really confuses me.
Posted by AgentP911
I don't think she's entirely at fault here people.
If Mr Taurus wants to run tests then this is what happens.
Misunderstandings etc.
If he knew she had come out of a four year relationship only a month beforehand then clearly it wasn't an issue for him to initiate something with the Leo.
If he had an issue then he should have stayed away.
If a guy told me he didn't want exclusivity and I wasn't to get jealous/possessive of him with other girls then it would be me running a mile.
Sure, the flirting in his face probably wasn't ideal but if he's not man enough to say what he wants but instead resorts to tests then this is how it goes.
What the hell is she supposed to think or do?
Thank you! I'm not a mind reader. I took everything he said at face value. He never admits to anything, even when he wanted to fight the guy I asked him why and all he could do is look away and say, "you know why". Even then he still didn't want to say he didn't like me talking to other guys. He just always confuses me. Yes I have played games but so has he. Aren't his tests games too? It seems like we're both at fault here.
Has anyone missed the point that this dude fucked this chick then two days later told her he wasn't interested in her to which she took at face value and when she started talking to another guy the dude decided to throw his toys out of his pram and make a scene by exerting his so called 'possessiveness'?
If he wanted her and wanted to keep her then he shouldn't have treated her in this manner.
How many threads have we read where women find men 'confusing' because they're NOT listening to his words or watching his actions?
This place is full of them.
If a man says something then we have to take at face value on most cases especially in a new relationship or dating experience.
His actions were too little too late.
He sounds fucked up now that more of the story is filtering through.
If he wanted her and wanted to keep her then he shouldn't have treated her in this manner.
How many threads have we read where women find men 'confusing' because they're NOT listening to his words or watching his actions?
This place is full of them.
If a man says something then we have to take at face value on most cases especially in a new relationship or dating experience.
His actions were too little too late.
He sounds fucked up now that more of the story is filtering through.
A four year relationship between 20 and 24 years old is pretty commendable and shows you're capable of commitment. Sure, you might like a flirt and maybe was t ready for something too serious too quickly but let's not put the Leo on the scrap heap or tar her with the 'slapper' brush. The Taurus was her third person. At 24 years old, again, this is NOT the sign of someone who sleeps about. Good on you girl.
I think the others have some good points here amidst some biased points but it's the Taurus board, it's expected.
I'd question whether you want anything to do with this fella anymore?
Oh and did the other fella call you— 😉 damn my Sag Merc!!!! Nosey fucker!!!
I think the others have some good points here amidst some biased points but it's the Taurus board, it's expected.
I'd question whether you want anything to do with this fella anymore?
Oh and did the other fella call you— 😉 damn my Sag Merc!!!! Nosey fucker!!!
Posted by tiziani
I agree with AgentP911.
In fact the only thing I blame you for is dumbing yourself down to this guy's level.
"Testing" you is a stupid excuse really. Once someone starts talking about liking pizzas for 15 days and tacos a day later you know it's a pretty fake relationship. It just sounds like you both wanted different things but were willing to bs each other to keep busy and distracted for the time being. I don't really see what or who you believe you pushed away.
Well see this is where it gets confusing again. He said that crap after he asked if I had been with my ex recently so I have no clue if he said that junk as a knee jerk reaction to that or not. Because after that he randomly said I just don't want you to get jealous of other girls which was completely unwarranted bc I hadn't done or said anything and then he said "I won't get jealous if you don't get jealous" what ever the heck that means. Any who he tells me about his bad experience with a girl he was just sleeping with got jealous when he talked to another girl. So I said you wouldn't have that issue if you didn't try to juggle other girls and then he said that stupid taco pizza crap.
Posted by jebrooks1988
I ignored him bc when he said I just don't want you to her jealous of other girls I took that as when you see me out to just leave him alone that's why I initially didn't speak to him... He asked who I came with, I introduced him to my best friend and he proceeds to tell her, "hey do you know I'm her first white guy" ...ummm ok? FYI I'm his first black girl ever. Then he tries to dance to on my friend, which was gross. Any who I proceeded to ignore his phone calls because I thought he was screwing with me. I ignored his text the next morning because he said "f*ck you" at 8:30 am which I refused to respond to and then hours later he said to come over but I didn't want to after he said f' you. I asked when he said the fwb thing to me if he lied when he said he thought we were working towards being exclusive and he claimed he was "hammered" that night and he said Idk may be. How do you not know if you lied about something? You're so brutally honest about going to "bang" other chicks and only being fwb with me but don't know if you lied or not? Even my friend that I was with said he wasn't drunk, he wasn't stumbling, slurring his words, etc., you can tell when someone is drunk. I don't know he just really confuses me.
You know, reading this and being a part of this whole thing, I have only one thing to say. Just move on. Regardless who wronged who, it doesn't sound to me that you like this guy all that much. Look up "Fuck Yes or No" by Mark Manson, because there's a critical roadblock here. This dude doesn't sound invested in you, and you are constantly confused by his actions. Just pack up and leave, because regardless if the relationship can be salvaged, it doesn't sound too good to me. Something this early on should be easy, at least fun.
Exactly! The last few posts are highlighting there's no match there between the two of them. Whatever those reasons are is irrelevant.
Verdict - the guy is a fucktard.
Actions - find someone better to laugh and enjoy life with.
Result - be happy!!
Verdict - the guy is a fucktard.
Actions - find someone better to laugh and enjoy life with.
Result - be happy!!
Posted by AgentP911
A four year relationship between 20 and 24 years old is pretty commendable and shows you're capable of commitment. Sure, you might like a flirt and maybe was t ready for something too serious too quickly but let's not put the Leo on the scrap heap or tar her with the 'slapper' brush. The Taurus was her third person. At 24 years old, again, this is NOT the sign of someone who sleeps about. Good on you girl.
I think the others have some good points here amidst some biased points but it's the Taurus board, it's expected.
I'd question whether you want anything to do with this fella anymore?
Oh and did the other fella call you— 😉 damn my Sag Merc!!!! Nosey fucker!!!
Yea I am definitely capable and initially I didn't want anything serious. This all started going downhill when I put my stupid foot all the way in my mouth. He and I were talking and my idiot self said I had a roster, he asked where he was and I told him he was last at 5 *smacks forehead* and then a week later he tells me he had a number one and "she's white"...? I guess that was supposed to hurt my feelings since I'm black? I knew he made that up to just get back at me. So a week after he said that he said "I don't want to lead you on I don't see this going anywhere if we're both dating other people I was cool with hanging out I don't want things to get serious" which was him saving face because none of what he said made sense. Dating other people but its getting serious? Makes no sense. Again sounds similar to what he's saying now almost. So yea this guy seems to be petty and insecure.
Posted by adwand2kPosted by jebrooks1988
I ignored him bc when he said I just don't want you to her jealous of other girls I took that as when you see me out to just leave him alone that's why I initially didn't speak to him... He asked who I came with, I introduced him to my best friend and he proceeds to tell her, "hey do you know I'm her first white guy" ...ummm ok? FYI I'm his first black girl ever. Then he tries to dance to on my friend, which was gross. Any who I proceeded to ignore his phone calls because I thought he was screwing with me. I ignored his text the next morning because he said "f*ck you" at 8:30 am which I refused to respond to and then hours later he said to come over but I didn't want to after he said f' you. I asked when he said the fwb thing to me if he lied when he said he thought we were working towards being exclusive and he claimed he was "hammered" that night and he said Idk may be. How do you not know if you lied about something? You're so brutally honest about going to "bang" other chicks and only being fwb with me but don't know if you lied or not? Even my friend that I was with said he wasn't drunk, he wasn't stumbling, slurring his words, etc., you can tell when someone is drunk. I don't know he just really confuses me.
You know, reading this and being a part of this whole thing, I have only one thing to say. Just move on. Regardless who wronged who, it doesn't sound to me that you like this guy all that much. Look up "Fuck Yes or No" by Mark Manson, because there's a critical roadblock here. This dude doesn't sound invested in you, and you are constantly confused by his actions. Just pack up and leave, because regardless if the relationship can be salvaged, it doesn't sound too good to me. Something this early on should be easy, at least fun.click to expand
Well I do like him a lot and the reason why I've stuck around is because I started this crap a long time ago. It was smooth sailing until this:
This all started going downhill when I put my stupid foot all the way in my mouth. He and I were talking and my idiot self said I had a roster, he asked where he was and I told him he was last at 5 *smacks forehead* and then a week later he tells me he had a number one and "she's white"...? I guess that was supposed to hurt my feelings since
Posted by scorchedearth
he's playing games yes. but she acted like a complete lunatic. and how she treated him is really what set me off. the fact that she did what she did with the guy. pretends to not understand his jealousy. ignored his calls and texts. and then she's CONFUSED.
yes he's a twat. but i have a hard time believing she's confused as to why he told her to gtfo. she has to be the most emotionally unaware person in the universe. literally every other human in the world could see what she did wrong, just not her.
I got why he was upset but to just downgrade me to someone as a sexual object, aka fwb is what I'm confused about. He knows I'm not that kind of girl, never will be and to say that to me is what I'm confused about.
@jebrooks1988
You've gotten a lot of good advice on this thread so far, and a lot of really useful insights from multiple Tauruses and some incredibly sharp and intuitive Scorpios. Listen to them, REALLY listen.
Don't repeat the same things you've said before. You didn't know you were being tested, you took what he said at face value, you were confused as to the things he was sharing with you. We get it. We understand. You've made your point. So where do you go from here?
I understand the difficulty of having a Leo Sun/Scorp Moon though I wouldn't trade it for anything. You asked what it means, so let's sidestep for a sec and I'll try to explain.
Your Leo Sun is how you express: blunt, straightforward, stubborn, warm, passionate... and naturally self-centered. On the one hand it can be good to put yourself first, make sure you take care of yourself. On the other hand, you can get stuck ONLY thinking of yourself and your side of the story.
Your Scorp Moon is how you feel on the inside, how you process them. It's intense, intuitive, endlessly curious, passionate, doesn't trust easily or well. So you're prone to being cautious, can easily go on the defensive, feel everything with an intensity that can overwhelm yourself and others. You can see everything, take in every detail; tone, body language, words... you see what they're showing AND what they're hiding.
Put these two together and you're a hurricane of emotions starting deep on the inside, and aren't afraid to let it out.
So calm the storm for a mo and listen to what others have been telling you.
Was he insecure before he met you? Possibly. Were you? Likely.
This pairing, particularly with your moons, is able to get under each other's skin so easily and so well.
Did you give him reasons to feel unsure? YES. Did he make his feelings and intentions clear? YES. I get you misunderstood... now OWN that. Tauruses don't communicate like us. There's always something underneath the surface, it's in what he DOES, it's what's in and around and between his words that shows who he is and how he feels.
You didn't get it, that's okay. So get it NOW. He's not only to blame, you are too. Once you can see that, you can figure out what to do next.
You've gotten a lot of good advice on this thread so far, and a lot of really useful insights from multiple Tauruses and some incredibly sharp and intuitive Scorpios. Listen to them, REALLY listen.
Don't repeat the same things you've said before. You didn't know you were being tested, you took what he said at face value, you were confused as to the things he was sharing with you. We get it. We understand. You've made your point. So where do you go from here?
I understand the difficulty of having a Leo Sun/Scorp Moon though I wouldn't trade it for anything. You asked what it means, so let's sidestep for a sec and I'll try to explain.
Your Leo Sun is how you express: blunt, straightforward, stubborn, warm, passionate... and naturally self-centered. On the one hand it can be good to put yourself first, make sure you take care of yourself. On the other hand, you can get stuck ONLY thinking of yourself and your side of the story.
Your Scorp Moon is how you feel on the inside, how you process them. It's intense, intuitive, endlessly curious, passionate, doesn't trust easily or well. So you're prone to being cautious, can easily go on the defensive, feel everything with an intensity that can overwhelm yourself and others. You can see everything, take in every detail; tone, body language, words... you see what they're showing AND what they're hiding.
Put these two together and you're a hurricane of emotions starting deep on the inside, and aren't afraid to let it out.
So calm the storm for a mo and listen to what others have been telling you.
Was he insecure before he met you? Possibly. Were you? Likely.
This pairing, particularly with your moons, is able to get under each other's skin so easily and so well.
Did you give him reasons to feel unsure? YES. Did he make his feelings and intentions clear? YES. I get you misunderstood... now OWN that. Tauruses don't communicate like us. There's always something underneath the surface, it's in what he DOES, it's what's in and around and between his words that shows who he is and how he feels.
You didn't get it, that's okay. So get it NOW. He's not only to blame, you are too. Once you can see that, you can figure out what to do next.
Sorry things keep getting cut off
** This all started going downhill when I put my stupid foot all the way in my mouth. He and I were talking and my idiot self said I had a roster, he asked where he was and I told him he was last at 5 *smacks forehead* and then a week later he tells me he had a number one and "she's white"...? I guess that was supposed to hurt my feelings since I'm black? I knew he made that up to just get back at me. So a week after he said that he said "I don't want to lead you on I don't see this going anywhere if we're both dating other people I was cool with hanging out I don't want things to get serious" which was him saving face because none of what he said made sense. Dating other people but its getting serious? Makes no sense. Again sounds similar to what he's saying now almost. So yea this guy seems to be petty and insecure. So I tried to put myself in his shoes after that. Before I put my foot in my mouth he asked to see me all the time, he pretty much did all the leg work. After that he got hot and cold understandably. He then got really hot again until he thought I was hanging out with another guy then got cold again. And then he got hot when he said it could be more then got cold.
** This all started going downhill when I put my stupid foot all the way in my mouth. He and I were talking and my idiot self said I had a roster, he asked where he was and I told him he was last at 5 *smacks forehead* and then a week later he tells me he had a number one and "she's white"...? I guess that was supposed to hurt my feelings since I'm black? I knew he made that up to just get back at me. So a week after he said that he said "I don't want to lead you on I don't see this going anywhere if we're both dating other people I was cool with hanging out I don't want things to get serious" which was him saving face because none of what he said made sense. Dating other people but its getting serious? Makes no sense. Again sounds similar to what he's saying now almost. So yea this guy seems to be petty and insecure. So I tried to put myself in his shoes after that. Before I put my foot in my mouth he asked to see me all the time, he pretty much did all the leg work. After that he got hot and cold understandably. He then got really hot again until he thought I was hanging out with another guy then got cold again. And then he got hot when he said it could be more then got cold.
Posted by scorchedearth
what you're not understanding is at this point you've played so many games that it doesn't matter anymore. you decided to do that. now he's not interested anymore. and you don't think that pushing him in that way should have given the results it did.
but you're not him. you can't control how he feels about the bullshit you pull.
he's made his intentions very clear about what he wants from you now. he's told you. you can choose to believe it or not. but if you continue on trying to force him to want more than he wants now you're just gonna hurt yourself.
You're right. I just figured since he said something like this before I thought there would be a chance to change things around again....
So now you guys think he was never really interested?
Posted by adwand2kPosted by jebrooks1988
I ignored him bc when he said I just don't want you to her jealous of other girls I took that as when you see me out to just leave him alone that's why I initially didn't speak to him... He asked who I came with, I introduced him to my best friend and he proceeds to tell her, "hey do you know I'm her first white guy" ...ummm ok? FYI I'm his first black girl ever. Then he tries to dance to on my friend, which was gross. Any who I proceeded to ignore his phone calls because I thought he was screwing with me. I ignored his text the next morning because he said "f*ck you" at 8:30 am which I refused to respond to and then hours later he said to come over but I didn't want to after he said f' you. I asked when he said the fwb thing to me if he lied when he said he thought we were working towards being exclusive and he claimed he was "hammered" that night and he said Idk may be. How do you not know if you lied about something? You're so brutally honest about going to "bang" other chicks and only being fwb with me but don't know if you lied or not? Even my friend that I was with said he wasn't drunk, he wasn't stumbling, slurring his words, etc., you can tell when someone is drunk. I don't know he just really confuses me.
You know, reading this and being a part of this whole thing, I have only one thing to say. Just move on. Regardless who wronged who, it doesn't sound to me that you like this guy all that much. Look up "Fuck Yes or No" by Mark Manson, because there's a critical roadblock here. This dude doesn't sound invested in you, and you are constantly confused by his actions. Just pack up and leave, because regardless if the relationship can be salvaged, it doesn't sound too good to me. Something this early on should be easy, at least fun.click to expand
It's so funny that you say that. I think that I really like him but my friends keep telling me I think that I want him but that I actually don't. Guess I'm not seeing what everyone else is seeing lol
Posted by jebrooks1988
Sorry things keep getting cut off
** This all started going downhill when I put my stupid foot all the way in my mouth. He and I were talking and my idiot self said I had a roster, he asked where he was and I told him he was last at 5 *smacks forehead* and then a week later he tells me he had a number one and "she's white"...? I guess that was supposed to hurt my feelings since I'm black? I knew he made that up to just get back at me. So a week after he said that he said "I don't want to lead you on I don't see this going anywhere if we're both dating other people I was cool with hanging out I don't want things to get serious" which was him saving face because none of what he said made sense. Dating other people but its getting serious? Makes no sense. Again sounds similar to what he's saying now almost. So yea this guy seems to be petty and insecure.
Everyone is insecure in some way. And everyone's insecurities can be triggered. If you like someone, you should aim to make them feel more secure. You definitely triggered his insecurities with the "roster" thing and he took a shot back at you. I'm surprised he was still interested in you after you said that.
When you start a relationship off with nonsense like this, expect to be in situations like you are. Now you've caught feelings but so much damage is already done. I don't think either of you have the level of communication or maturity required to repair this.
Its definitely a lesson. These kind of childish games just hurt everyone. I'm sure most of us have had to learn these lessons ourselves at some point.
Posted by jebrooks1988Posted by scorchedearth
what you're not understanding is at this point you've played so many games that it doesn't matter anymore. you decided to do that. now he's not interested anymore. and you don't think that pushing him in that way should have given the results it did.
but you're not him. you can't control how he feels about the bullshit you pull.
he's made his intentions very clear about what he wants from you now. he's told you. you can choose to believe it or not. but if you continue on trying to force him to want more than he wants now you're just gonna hurt yourself.
You're right. I just figured since he said something like this before I thought there would be a chance to change things around again....click to expand
All I keep reading is Bullshit, all from you. I'm pretty good about reading people, even from just text and you have red flags all over you. Notice I said flags (plural), you are so special that you deserve more than one. Possibly even an audio alert, and a backup beeper, too.
All I see is Deception and one really bad case of non deduction skills. Earlier I was at hanging you, now I've graduated to strapping you to a rocket on a one way ticket into the universe, as I have serious doubts about you possessing the ability not to fuck something up cruising in our solar system, or even our galaxy for that matter.
To infinity and beyond!
Posted by aurora
i don't understand one thing, you were ignoring his calls, and i assume texts in which he asked you to come, and after one week of silence, he contacts you by saying we should stop hang out, lets be fwb? wtf? is there a chance that he was actually offering you what he thinks you want? i see no other explanation. or he has asperger syndrome.
the thing with "don't get jealous with other girls" probably meant, if you see me talking with someone, don't worry i'm not interested in them. and i'm almost sure he meant that cause after the "incident" he informed you that he is changing his mind and he is going to see other girls. if he was about to do it before the incident, he wouldn't mention it now. god, you are a leo! why so pessimistic! so of course he had no idea that you got it all wrong, and after that he sees you do what you did. i can't imagine how shocked he was. if you can shock a taurus man at all.
i read now that at the same time he mentioned that you weren't exclusive and the thing with other girls. i can't be sure right now, i would have to literally hear your conversation to know, but i still think that these 2 statements weren't connected the way you think. being exclusive with a taurus usually means he wants to get married lol, so you obviously weren't there. why didn't you asked him right there to elaborate? yeah, you were probably too pissed to think clear.
if you still care then the honesty is the best policy.
Ugh I wish I could tell you the conversation, it would make things so much more clear lol. Yea he said all those things to me after we had sex and figured out that I had been with my ex recently. Even after his stupid comments he said that I should take a picture of us together and send it to my ex, what the heck? And then kept asking if I was texting him and kept saying my ex's name, I told him no and he said I know you are I said no I'm talking to my best friend he said let me see so I showed him and he still didn't believe me I guess because he said go back to the last 5 min. of people you were texting I said no and to get out my phone. He tried that I don't want you to get jealous crap before after I said the whole him being on my roster thing.I asked where he got that from bc who said anything about getting jealous he said forget that I said that but asked well will you get jealous of other girls? said will you get jealou
^^keeps getting cut off
** Ugh I wish I could tell you the conversation, it would make things so much more clear lol. Yea he said all those things to me after we had sex and figured out that I had been with my ex recently. Even after his stupid comments he said that I should take a picture of us together and send it to my ex, what the heck? And then kept asking if I was texting him and kept saying my ex's name, I told him no and he said I know you are I said no I'm talking to my best friend he said let me see so I showed him and he still didn't believe me I guess because he said go back to the last 5 min. of people you were texting I said no and to get out my phone. He tried that I don't want you to get jealous crap before after I said the whole him being on my roster thing.I asked where he got that from bc who said anything about getting jealous he said forget that I said that but asked well will you get jealous of other girls? said will you get jealous of other girls? He said I won't get jealous if you don't get jealous whatever that means. He said I won't if you won't part in conjunction with I don't want you to get jealous part that night we had sex too. My friend said he said that just to build himself up since it came out of nowhere, who knows.
Yea I reached out to him after a week and pretty much said I know you're still probably mad wanted to see you...nothing. Tried again days later because I just assumed he was still mad and understandably so and that's when he said he wasn't mad but that we should stop hanging out because he didn't want to hurt me. *only hitting the high points* said yea this isn't going anywhere and eventually said we can still hang out but it'll just be fwb pretty much and how he was going to "bang" other chicks. Yea the fwb is where I was shocked because he's the third guy I've ever slept with and knows that I'm not that kind of girl.
** Ugh I wish I could tell you the conversation, it would make things so much more clear lol. Yea he said all those things to me after we had sex and figured out that I had been with my ex recently. Even after his stupid comments he said that I should take a picture of us together and send it to my ex, what the heck? And then kept asking if I was texting him and kept saying my ex's name, I told him no and he said I know you are I said no I'm talking to my best friend he said let me see so I showed him and he still didn't believe me I guess because he said go back to the last 5 min. of people you were texting I said no and to get out my phone. He tried that I don't want you to get jealous crap before after I said the whole him being on my roster thing.I asked where he got that from bc who said anything about getting jealous he said forget that I said that but asked well will you get jealous of other girls? said will you get jealous of other girls? He said I won't get jealous if you don't get jealous whatever that means. He said I won't if you won't part in conjunction with I don't want you to get jealous part that night we had sex too. My friend said he said that just to build himself up since it came out of nowhere, who knows.
Yea I reached out to him after a week and pretty much said I know you're still probably mad wanted to see you...nothing. Tried again days later because I just assumed he was still mad and understandably so and that's when he said he wasn't mad but that we should stop hanging out because he didn't want to hurt me. *only hitting the high points* said yea this isn't going anywhere and eventually said we can still hang out but it'll just be fwb pretty much and how he was going to "bang" other chicks. Yea the fwb is where I was shocked because he's the third guy I've ever slept with and knows that I'm not that kind of girl.
Posted by aurora
well that changes everything cause you are the one who reached out, and that wasn't clear from the op. by reaching out it's like you admitted that you did something wrong. so he put you in fwb basket.
i don't know did you answer him, but if you didn't and if you want a completely clear situation with him you could tell him no, i'm not interested. i stopped being interested at the very same moment when you mentioned other girls. so at the bar i was a free woman. so, you acting jealous was selfish.
and that's it, say nothing more, and let him think about it, and reach out with a new plan if he is still interested. i think it's really important to make it completely simple and honest with what you want and don't want. and it will take some time. give it a week or two.
How does me reaching out change everything? So do you think he's ego is just shot right now or...?
Posted by aurora
well that changes everything cause you are the one who reached out, and that wasn't clear from the op. by reaching out it's like you admitted that you did something wrong. so he put you in fwb basket.
i don't know did you answer him, but if you didn't and if you want a completely clear situation with him you could tell him no, i'm not interested. i stopped being interested at the very same moment when you mentioned other girls. so at the bar i was a free woman. so, you acting jealous was selfish.
and that's it, say nothing more, and let him think about it, and reach out with a new plan if he is still interested. i think it's really important to make it completely simple and honest with what you want and don't want. and it will take some time. give it a week or two.
This is a good post.
Met my ex when I was 19 so he's pretty much all I know so I'm pretty relationship inept right now unfortunately lol :/
Posted by jebrooks1988
Yea the fwb is where I was shocked because he's the third guy I've ever slept with and knows that I'm not that kind of girl.
Wrong. Re-read what you posted.
Posted by jebrooks1988
Last weekend saw him while I was out I completely ignored him and talked to other guys while he was there because we agreed not to get jealous.I was giving my number to another guy and he comes up and said "she's not going to call you bro, she's coming home with me".
click to expand
You ARE that kind of girl.
Your so-called pledge of chastity and loyalty is contingent according to which man is paying you some attention at the moment.
You move on impulse.
Which means there are NO barriers with you.
Piss me off and I will cheat on you!
Even if your interpretation of a given situation is delusional.
This Bull is smart.
He has you in the proper category.
Nothing more needs to be addressed.
Posted by TaurusBull1977
You move on impulse.
Which means there are NO barriers with you.
Piss me off and I will cheat on you!
Honestly I am always looking/testing to see if a woman is this kind of woman.
I don't understand why some women keeping a man when he already announced and she really heard it loud it was an FWB. There should be no confusion. drop him like a hot potato is all I can do.
TLS-
Many people are under the impression that Bulls look for perfection.
When in reality...
We are actually searching for the REAL thing.
People who do not hide their true nature.
Observing, and actively listening....
...And looking for inconsistencies.
The OP can pledge an allegiance to her restrictive v% gina about chastity...
But a true reserved woman, a lady, presents herself as one at all times.
A mans' actions doesn't dictate or define who she is.
The OP acted as if she had no other alternative but to keep her options open.
When in reality, this was her choice.
...And her choices defined who she really was.
The Bull has her in the appropriate category...
Even if the OP is still delusional on how she was demoted from a potential girlfriend to a possible jump-off.
Many people are under the impression that Bulls look for perfection.
When in reality...
We are actually searching for the REAL thing.
People who do not hide their true nature.
Observing, and actively listening....
...And looking for inconsistencies.
The OP can pledge an allegiance to her restrictive v% gina about chastity...
But a true reserved woman, a lady, presents herself as one at all times.
A mans' actions doesn't dictate or define who she is.
The OP acted as if she had no other alternative but to keep her options open.
When in reality, this was her choice.
...And her choices defined who she really was.
The Bull has her in the appropriate category...
Even if the OP is still delusional on how she was demoted from a potential girlfriend to a possible jump-off.
Dont waste your time. Too many games. Find someone more mature. Most Taurus aren't worth the mental. 7 billion people on this planet... and you chasing him?
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