Here we go again...

Wow! After two and a half months i get a call from my aqua! He says he just wants to say hi and that i'm still his baby and he missed me all that time..YEAH RIGHT!!! I ask him why he never called if he missed me so much and i get a little attitude and so i give him a little attitude back...hell no he's not gonna act like he did nothing wrong and expect to just pick up where he left off! I ask him if he fell asleep for over 2 months and just woke up and he replies "something like that but i'm awake now!" (go figure!) We talk for a while, him trying his best to act as normal...me being very distant but polite. Since then he's called me about 3 times, i've spoken to him but have kept the conversation very general and i can tell he is getting annoyed that i'm not how i used to be with him. What i want to know is do aquas actually know when they have done something wrong? Do you expect people just to forgive and forget with no questions asked? It seems like he's either got amnesia or doing a good job of acting like he has!

"Do you aquas expect people just to forgive and forget with no questions asked?"

yes I do, alittle, naughty i suppose, but I do.... not condoning what he did though...

kinda, mainly because we dont see any of that as anything THAT serious...the phone issue.

If we felt guilty in some shape or form I think we are much different.

YES, GUILTS DIFFERENT

Who does?

well maybe the males are like the way branh describes but I been at the self awareness game for years and i am quick to look at myself in the mirror...karma

Aquas can be called to the table, its jus how its done, if your criticizing and pointing then yeah we tune you out and become gaurded but if you can relay to us without all the emotional energy behind which makes an aqua uncomfortable then yeah we can deal with it.

Its all in the approach

Venuslady he comes back b/c he loves you simple as that and he also wants to see if you can let the past be the past...if you can't then stop all communication with him and move on, its not healthy to keep speaking with him if your not ready to move beyond the past, its redundant and unhealthy.

I have no problem with self-awareness. In fact I think aquas are HIGHLY sef-aware...we know our faults more than anyone, we're harder on ourselves more than anyone could ever be.

So when your called on your shit, you know better than anyone what you did was wrong...and to harp on it, is just unnecessary....Like I said a guilty aqua is different.

Its actually a benefit to the other individual for an aqua to feel guilty.

I actually stop and look at myself every time I pass a mirror, its a habit 🙂

I actually agree with the above^^

Some of us have a tendency of exploiting the other persons feelings for us.

The above situation I feel is a form of exploitation on Venusladys feelings for him...coming and going as we please is usually it.

well Venus keeps interacting so why should he not treat her this way, if she cut off all communication he would come off his BS but no she engages him with conversation, he's attempting to wear her down hoping she will feel lonely enough to allow him back in, if she truly is over him and doesn't want anything to do with him then cut the cord and move on...now if she searches her heart and finds that she still desires him in some way, then its her responsibility to make it clear every time he calls she's not over her anger...she doesn't have to go into why and what for with him because he will try to engage her and debate it...no she isn't going to compete with him...jus tell him hey i'm still mad/angry with you and end the call...this will make him come EVENTUALLY off his BS, humble himself and open up his heart....

I agree tough love works pretty well.
You might need to wait awhile for him to 'open' up or concede to his BS though.

well, maybe he did leave her for another woman and got dumped and is now returning back to her...but, maybe he realized through being with the other woman, that he really loved her. you never know...
but, yes, she must move on from the past if she still loves him and still wants to be with him...or else it will not work.

Branh0913:
I agree with you 100% . I think he probably did have another chick and things didn't work out but that's cool because i've not exactly been sitting at home by the phone either (well i did for the first 2 weeks..lol). I'm actually not sure whether i want to be in a relationship with him anymore, i still desire him but the feelings i had have changed a lot. If he can bring them back good...if not, no problem!

Tiki33:
Oh Tiki, Tiki, Tiki...where do i start? You are quite right its all about the approach and to be honest sometimes your approach could do with being a little less harsh! But let me break it down for you a little, i did not do anything wrong so i see no reason why i shouldn't answer my phone or engage in conversation with him, my concious is clear! If he chooses to call me then he should be prepared for cold/distant treatment until he's ready to admit he messed up, i know he knows it but he's hoping i'll just sweep it under the carpet and move on! No chance! The point being i will continue to conversate with him in my own way and if he can't handle it then it is HE who needs to move on from an unhealthy situation. If he wants to hope for something more than that then he needs to be prepared to face the truth because until he does nothing will change! Everytime i talk to him and he offers no explanation for his behaviour or shows no remorse, it makes my resistance to his temptation stronger, i am quite happy just to be a friend he calls twice a year at the moment...so sorry but i am not the one suffering, its him. Its up to him to deal with his conscious not me and if he has none then what a sad life he shall live. Me on the other hand, i wake up smiling every day...no guilt here!

Lady M:
I agree tough love does work and he may not know it now but someone needs to show him his BS is not acceptable and i'm just the one! He doesn't have to open up to me but he needs to recognise he will never have a fulfilling relationship with any woman while he continues to keep all that BS hanging around!

Oh and to be honest i do feel he loves me but at the same time he doesn't know what the hell to do with me...so until he works that out, i'm going to keep doing me because it feels so damn good! :-)

i know thats right ladyvenus...do your thang girl...i got your back lol!

I told you all they way crazy...no one listened.

I have not been around here forever but thought I would stop by for a change of pace. So I saw this post and it hit home for me. Oh Venus Lady, we can be a bit clueless at times but a bit scattered and well get involved elsewhere in things and mosy on back when it suits us but myself as an Aqua, if I am really into someone, I'm not out of touch, I'm probably more in touch than I should be. If I don't care that much then tons of time can go by without me noticing that much and then I might feel like reconnecting for a bit just to see how things are. If you want to be frustrated all the time stick with it, otherwise find someone who is a bit more steady. I had my heart set on an Aqau too, still writes every month and a half or so, telling me how much he still wants to see me when he does yet doesn't know how to make that happen. It has been over a year now. Whatever, I got myself an Aries guy and he is solid, right there with me and spoils me as if I was the most important person on earth and we have FUN together and I get what I need, so why sit and wait. Sure the Aqua males are fascinating, but if they don't chase me down, I'm elsewhere finding what else works too.