My Aqua sun/cancer moon man is being unclear about a break up

I'm a Virgo sun (leo-Virgo cusp)/cap moon and I am/was dating this Aqua sun/cancer moon guy I met over the summer while we were both staying on campus for an internship. We were both attracted to each other from day 1 but we became friends first and then started dating a few weeks in. We had a lot of fun over the summer and practically lived together (we were neighbors to start with). Since I don't go to his college, we continued the relationship as long distance after the summer ended. So now, I visit him mostly every Friday since I'm continuing my summer project (i took it for him, so I could see him every week) and sometimes I stay over at his place.

Last-last week, I'd been feeling off after coming back home and just had been generally miserable that entire week. When we virgos get like that, we just want space so I withdrew from everyone and they let me, except my aqua man. He thought I was upset with him every time I said I didn't really want to talk. So I was kind of forced to talk and try to explain and eventually I'd just get irritated and angry with him about some trivial thing he said and accuse him of not loving me as much as he thinks or not wanting to see me. To me, it didn't seem like a big deal to say that to him but I guess I'd have been really hurt too if he had said that to me. This went on for the week and we had an argument on Thursday night about his planned visit for the next day (cause I couldn't go that week so he said he could come visit me this time) and I felt unloved so I accused him of not wanting to see me and why he's even bothering to come and why doesn't he just break up with me then, etc. I also ate a candy bar that made me really sick because I'm diabetic and he ended up staying on video call with me the entire night to make sure I was breathing, which I was very touched by.

Next morning, I got hysterical because he said he was tired and didn't know when he could come visit and I'd been looking forward to seeing him all week. He also said something that made it sound like he was breaking up with me. He did say at one point that he wasn't and still loved me but I missed in it in the hysteria and threatened to eat another candy bar, which he thought would kill me so he freaked out and calmed me down by saying he was leaving now to come see me. We ended up falling asleep and he didn't come see me. He instead went to the res life office on campus and reported the incident to try and get me help. He thought I was suicidal, I just wanted to cause myself enough physical pain to drown out the emotional pain that the idea of him leaving me was causing. So I guess he thought that I was so upset and miserable with him that I wanted to kill myself over it, even though the actual situation was that I was in so much pain because I thought he was leaving me.

Later that day, he video called and said he didn't think he could handle this and wanted to break up, I asked him to think about it and he said okay. I ended up texting him the situation from my side of it that night and he said he understood it now and saw it from my side and said that he still loves me and that we can get past this. Then he calls me later that day to again say that he's feeling badly about it and is unsure and afraid again but he'll think about it. Then he called me on Sunday to say he had thought about it all and didn't think he could continue right now. He gave me a few reasons:

1. He had kind of felt like he had to tip tie around my feelings a lot of the time (saying something trivial could make me upset).

2. He feels like if he hangs out with his friends, I'll get upset (this was referring to one time when he said a guy friend of his had asked him to dinner at a ramen place and I'd jokingly teased him that he was going to date another guy now; it had been obviously a joke and I had clarified at the end of it that it was and said that it was a great idea he was hanging out with friends)

3. He said that he felt like if he wasn't here to always talk and take care of me, I wouldn't be okay or would flip out so he has to drop everything to talk to me (think this was referring to the time I was really upset and asked to talk cause he said he would drop everything if I really needed him but he was playing a game he couldn't pause and made me wait an hour until the game had ended to talk to him, unless I had wanted to talk while he was playing).

Anyway, half of that was BS because I had felt like we spent too much time talking and not enough just living out individual lives and hanging out with friends and I had tried to get him to do that more and leave me alone for some time but he wouldn't. I said over and over that I was fine with him hanging out with friends and playing games or doing whatever. Everything he mentioned had been a problem before the first break up but I had fixed that after so it's not an issue but the way he's thinking about it, it's still an issue.

This is super long but the reason I'm confused is because on sunday, when we did the video call, he made it sound like he wasn't even going to consider trying again right now but "if our paths crossed in the future, he would be open to something then". Then I texted him about stuff id realized about how I must have made him feel and why it hurt and he said thank you for that but "he was really hurt by it all and doesn't know what to think or how he feels and he's going to need a lot of time", which sounds like he's considering trying again. Now he's ignoring everything I say unless it's a legit question (like asking him to pick up a delivery or asking if we're meeting up tomorrow because he wasn't sure last time I asked).

What do you all think is going on with him? Also I forgot to mention earlier but the reason this hit me so hard and I'm trying so much is because he's the love of my life and he said I was the love of his, we've always felt this way about each other and before we broke up, we were engaged.

Obvious he doesn't want to breakup you crapcon moon is so cold.

Posted by AerialView
Obvious he doesn't want to breakup you crapcon moon is so cold.

I know that and I know that Aquas, when really hurt by someone, ignore the person who hurt them and focus on their hobbies and friends (he's been playing games all last week and hanging with friends) but would you give that person another chance if they asked for it and showed that they really love you and have actual ways to fix the issues between you?

He's been really paranoid and "scared" about constantly upsetting me even though it's not always like that and sometimes it's more that I'm just having a rough time and he doesn't give me the space I need to deal with it.

Posted by AerialView
Obvious he doesn't want to breakup you crapcon moon is so cold.

capricorn lovess cancer though and vice versa....they warm eachother up.

Posted by lisabethur8

Posted by AerialView
Obvious he doesn't want to breakup you crapcon moon is so cold.

capricorn lovess cancer though and vice versa....they warm eachother up.

click to expand

True that, I'm emotionally cold with most people but I'm very open and warm with him and I love that he's so emotional, it's a really nice feeling. That's why I'm having a hard time dealing with the silence because it's not like him to ignore me or be cold towards me and that's the Aquarius in him, cause apparently Aquas get cold and ignore those that hurt them and I know i did, pretty badly too, though I'm not entirely sure how.

Posted by lisabethur8

Posted by AerialView
Obvious he doesn't want to breakup you crapcon moon is so cold.

capricorn lovess cancer though and vice versa....they warm eachother up.

click to expand

Meh I doubt it 😑