@Weeds and @Ixion - that Virgo thread

I posted this to you in the thread about the Virgo that showed up after a year to his ex who had a fiancé, but the thread was removed.

@Weeds and @Ixion - I am curious about this though, have you ever been in a similar situation.? I get the 'I'm not ready for a relationship' part and the 'I've worked on myself and now I am ready for a relationship' but what then? Do you go through a catalogue of your ex's and decide which ones still have potential? Is there always one that you are keeping on hold in your head for the time when you are ready? Why not just move on and meet someone new and start fresh once you are ready?

I've seen a lot of Virgos do this and I always find it curious.

@Ixion - seems you responded before the thread went down. so to continue...



Definitely not the case for me.

Break ups are usually permanent for me. If I am curious about prospects with an ex they usually are not acted upon...I have no expectation whatsoever that someone I like or even loved will wait around for me.



I have gone back to revisit relationships but I don't stay in place while doing so. The exploration of a relationship is not a commitment for me...and beyond that, I talk to multiple people at the same time..up until the point where someone I am talking and seeing regularly becomes a deep emotional investiture and likely to become a partner...until, someone, I am dating reaches that level I am likely to have several relationship balls in the air...I express the above to the people I am interested in and its all done transparently that this is what I will be doing even if I don't give whomever I am talking to a play by play of what is happening in other realms. The flip side is, however, they are fully free to do the same.



--It sounds to me that you are always 'ready' or at least open to the idea of a relationship? Just not into the idea of jumping into one body of water with both feet, more interested in sticking your toes in as many as you can to see which will be the warmest? 🙂

When I hear someone say they aren't ready for a relationship, I assume they are doing some self-reflection or working on other parts of their lives. Taking a bit of a hiatus from dating.

So what happens during that year disappearance that potentially would bring him back, did he find her to be the warmest or was he just out of warm places?

Posted by Ixion

Posted by WildatHeart
@Ixion - seems you responded before the thread went down. so to continue...



Definitely not the case for me.

Break ups are usually permanent for me. If I am curious about prospects with an ex they usually are not acted upon...I have no expectation whatsoever that someone I like or even loved will wait around for me.



I have gone back to revisit relationships but I don't stay in place while doing so. The exploration of a relationship is not a commitment for me...and beyond that, I talk to multiple people at the same time..up until the point where someone I am talking and seeing regularly becomes a deep emotional investiture and likely to become a partner...until, someone, I am dating reaches that level I am likely to have several relationship balls in the air...I express the above to the people I am interested in and its all done transparently that this is what I will be doing even if I don't give whomever I am talking to a play by play of what is happening in other realms. The flip side is, however, they are fully free to do the same.



--It sounds to me that you are always 'ready' or at least open to the idea of a relationship? Just not into the idea of jumping into one body of water with both feet, more interested in sticking your toes in as many as you can to see which will be the warmest? 🙂

When I hear someone say they aren't ready for a relationship, I assume they are doing some self-reflection or working on other parts of their lives. Taking a bit of a hiatus from dating.

So what happens during that year disappearance that potentially would bring him back, did he find her to be the warmest or was he just out of warm places?

I mean neither the content or the substance of someone who disappears for a year will be universal so I couldn't speak to their specific circumstances just speculate if I dare....lol and I don't dare to as likely the analysis would be off.

And I wouldn't say that I am always ready or even open...but if I am bothering to talk to someone I am trying to see whats what... as they usually do the same. If things get more serious then its a dating thing... I will ask for exclusivity if the chemistry and compatibility is good...but I don't do that lightly.

click to expand

Thanks for the clarification 🙂