This is not about Astrology...

Personally I agree. unless you really do have no one in your life that will care about you dying, then it is selfish.

I like to believe there is always hope, everything could change tomorrow. Maybe that's my Sagi ascendent talking but I always htink there must be something worth living for. Rarely are things that bad.

Do you have any idea what gave him suicidal thoughts?

Brian, that is so sad, I am so sorry to hear that...

This is really sad. But come to think of it - it is also about circumstances and individual's level of endurance. This is not called for no doubt about it - but it will actually be unfair to judge anyone. Like physical attributes - mental strength is also about a certain pattern of distributon. If we can make an effort to understand a person with congenital disorders for example - then we can also possibly be objective with an individual who hasn't been favorably endowed with great mental and emotional strength.

If I haven't been a victim of vicious circumstances ever or I came unscathed out of it - then I really dont feel it will be appropriate to ascribe that to my capabilities alone. I may have been helped on my way by random and implicit forces/events/factors which kept the harshness of environment just below my tolerance level.

But then even the murderers and other criminals who cause visible harm to others can claim that they are inherently disturbed.

Do I have an answer ? - No.

Sorry to hear this, a male friend called me last night and shared w/me his suicidal tendencies, he has been struggling for a month or more, he is 29. Sad, all you can do is be there to support his grieving family. I am sorry to hear this has touched your life.


hugs.....
PGA

briana, you're an idiot, plain and simple.

"MissCancerous" summed it up perfectly. It's HIS life, not everyone elses. He doesn't have to continue living just because other people want him around. They aren't suffering what he's suffering. It's his life and if what he's going through is too much to continue living, then he has the right to choose whether or not to end it all.

Are you telling me that he's supposed to just stick around to satisfy everyone else? What about himself though? He has to continue living in pain just to make other people (who probably already live great lives without any depression) happy? I think that's incredibly ignorant.

Sure i'd be devastated if someone I loved committed suicide, but I could atleast understand that they did it because they were miserable beyond repair and wanted to be "put out of their misery". It takes a TON of courage and balls to actually kill yourself, so if you actually go through with it, then clearly you really did want to die.

Stop thinking about yourself briana, just because him being alive made you happy doesn't mean it made him happy. It's his life and it's his decisions.

Angry,

imagine a ship in the stormy sea. It goes through different waves and can surpass them. Only one wave brings it to break.

so a young people must know that
a. life is full of dangers
b. they can surpass most of them
c. nobody should give up the game before the final downfall.


Now I think it was the effect of drugs and withdrawal. I guess they get some medicament to substitute the drugs and some of them raise the idea of suicide.

briana,

check how dependent on the drugs some of your dear ones are.
this is the only thing you can do at this point.
Again many young people go through drugs. Only a minority becomes victim.
no fear. keep cool and check the reality. later you will be proud if only a small question (and investigation) helped you and your friends.

In my life I met three people lost in paranoia. One of them I could help him get of it. that is enough for me. The other two people I met them when their paranoia was older than two years. So I do not feel weak that I could not help. Other people should have helped them when it was fresh. A fresh paranoia can be healed.

He was on suicide watch while institutionalized?

Did his family know this? Did they know he was a suicide risk?

Why was he left alone?

In mothers room .... in the room of the person who is suppose to be there and not leave him alone.


A sad poetic justice?

I'm sorry to hear this Briana... heart goes out to those he left behind.
I do think it's hard to understand what decisions people make as it is hard to fully grasp what people are going through

"She says she wishes he would have told her he was going to do it because then she would have felt more prepared"



I thought that he was on suicide watch?

Sounds to me as if he was in much pain and distraught .. with nobody to hear his pleas.


In hindsight, his family now grieves.



I don't blame him for dying, if this was his wish .. for it was his distraught to have to endure alone ... and indeed he was alone, for if he wasn't alone, if somebody heard his cries for help, then he'd still be alive.

What is it was are sad about when a person dies?

Are we grieving because this person left us?
Are we grieving because it's too late for us to do soemthing?
Are we grieving because we (ourselves) don't have soemthing?

At what point do we grieve for the distress this person was enduring before the flame was distinguished?

Do we grieve for the torment they had to endure?

Or, do we only grieve for ourselves, because something we want, we can no longer have?


I think the living are much more selfish than the dead.

Agree with P-Angel...There was some reason why he did it in moms room. Something happened in childhood?

It is very sad and personally can relate (my sis and addict for 30 years).

Some poeple just cannot find happiness in their lives, find excuses to use and CHOOSE (YES>> I SAY CHOOSE!) not get clean after years of rehabs/detox/methadone/therapy/support. I have seen the detox from heroin and methodone with her, seizures and all...not a pretty site and very painful to watch.

Sometimes it is "just their time" to leave this earth, albeit sad and heartbreaking. Suicide is thier choice. Just like addiction: stealing,abandoning your 2 year old, putting family in finacial and emotional distress for 30 years is a choice as well.

Sorry...should not have posted...venting a little bit..

"He had a drug problem & was in jail 3 days prior and was going through withdrawals.
But he really wasn't the suicidal type...I guess this was too much for him to handle this time. "

BINGO!

But let's look at why he had a drug problem...I am assuming childhood issues since he made a point to do it in moms room...just my $ .02.

P-Angel...(sorry to keep posting)...but "for if he wasn't alone, if somebody heard his cries for help, then he'd still be alive."

NOT TRUE!

Many addicts have A LOT of support...more than enough to accept help and listen to their cries. It is up to them to use the tools given by supportive family/friends/rehabs.

Perhaps he was sick of being sick...period. Sick of being alive/life, sick of being an addict, affecting everyones lives, causing misery to those around him, felt he did not want to stop using, living with something that happened in his past he cannot escape..who knows.

Perhaps decided not worth the pain of w/drawel and left to a painless place.

yea I don't think we can class decisions as selfish as we really know what they're going through. Are we happier seeing the person alive but depressed and lifeless?

Your right, and it's not about US...it's about them and it was their time to leave this earth. Some people are not happy in their own skin, no matter what/who helps them.

Cowardly way out...but he was an addict so..... One thing everyone has to remember/celebrate is how is was BEFORE he started using.

"suffering produces endurance; endurance produces character and character produces hope"
and with hope anything is possible if you want it.

i feel sorry for those who loved him/family etc. He died once and they will die a thoussand times, through guilt and people passing judgements(oh the family must have screwed him up and blah blah blah.)

"suffering produces endurance; endurance produces character and character produces hope"
and with hope anything is possible if you want it.


that was beautiful

Angryscorp...normally I wouldn't bother responding to your asinine cries for attention but really I'm just going to suggest you reread my postings before talking shit...

"I'm trying to find peace with the fact that although it was an irrational and selfish decision, it was his decision - his life. I guess he just did what he thought was best for himself and everyone else. It was not what we wanted...but obviously what he wanted. (It took alot of will power on his part - it was far from an accident.)"

I even reposted it so you don't have to scroll. 🙂 You're welcome idiot.

makes sense but you don't have to call her names to explain your point .


Yes I Do. People who are stupid deserve to be called such.

The only way i'm satisfied with getting my points across is through good old fashion insults and cursing. It's how I express my displeasure with the dumb.

Thank you all again for your responses.

His family was trying their hardest to support him and get him through this addiction. He had moved out of state and therefore they were unaware of the seriousness of the problem until they all went to visit him. They realized they needed to get him out of the environment. Which is why they brought him back home with them.

He was always out of control (since I've known the family he always did whatever he wanted and really no one could stop him.) They were both spoiled and when he didn't get his way, as he was used to, he was quite destructive.

Yes he was on suicide watch while he was in jail and they released him anyway. He was at home being monitored but he left. (He is an adult they could not stop him.) Their next step was to baker act him but they did not know where he was at the time. Infact, they didn't even know he came home. (This all happened really fast.)
He did this in the middle of the night. The mother was not in her room...but went looking for him later because she saw his shoes by the door. (It was his old room - he didn't do it to get back at his mother.)

Anyways, I'm not going to blame his family for any of this. They're blaming themselves enough - as all families of suicide victims do.

It's truly tragic. I guess I wasn't clear before: I'm sad for his family. Not for him. It was his choice. But it will effect his family for years I'm sure.

I agree, however, if it were my sister on suicide watch she would not have left my sight for weeks.

But in the same way: a person truly determined to kill themselves will find a way.

Angryscorp...normally I wouldn't bother responding to your asinine cries for attention but really I'm just going to suggest you reread my postings before talking shit...

"I'm trying to find peace with the fact that although it was an irrational and selfish decision, it was his decision - his life. I guess he just did what he thought was best for himself and everyone else. It was not what we wanted...but obviously what he wanted. (It took alot of will power on his part - it was far from an accident.)"

I even reposted it so you don't have to scroll. You're welcome idiot.


Doesn't change the fact that you keep calling him selfish and you keep calling it a selfish act. As if somehow he's living his life specifically just for you and his family. To call "suicide" a selfish act as insanely arrogant, it's basically you and his family saying "but what about ME?? What about what I want??". It's his fucking life, he doesn't need to stick around and continue being miserable just to satisfy you.

Judging by how annoying you are, I can see just why he killed himself. I'd kill myself too if I had to put up with your stupid, mindless shit.

Ok again...read my posts. You're looking more and more ignorant by the moment. I was not close to him, but his sister. I am sad for her and her family. Not for him. I knew the only end to this would be his death. I knew it for quite some time.


I still think suicide is a selfish and irrational decision. At the moment you choose to end your life you are thinking about you and only you. How you're in so much pain and agony and everything is just about you.

At the same time, it would be selfish for one to wish a person live in pain for their sake of having them around.

There is no right answer. The whole thing sucks.

Like you.

Everyone is going to have a different outlook on it. I see both sides.
So, thanks for your opinion. It's really too bad you couldn't express it in a more intelligent and rational manner...

but then again, that was your intention. To look like an asshole and get attention from SOMEONE; anyone. Quit crying. It's so unbecoming.

IT DOES NOT MATTER WHERE HE DID IT.....

SORRY, COMPUTER PROBS.......it was his choice......

FOR ALL OF YOU WHO KEEP SAYING IT WAS HIS CHOICE. SHUT THE FUCK UP! ITS ALSO SOMEONES

CHOICE TO TAKE ANOTHERS LIFE TOO BUT DOES THAT MAKE IT RIGHT? NO YOU IDIOT! ITS

CRIMINAL AND SO IS SUICIDE! ITS NOT HIS CHOICE! GO BACK AND READ ABOUT A MAN

THAT ASSISTED IN THE "SUCIDE" OF MANY CRITICALLY ILL PEOPLE AND SEE IF THAT WAS JUST

HIS CHOICE. THAT PERSON DOESNT GET TO CHOOSE WHETHER HE LIVES OR DIES. GOD DOES THAT.

ONLY HIM! THERE ARE SOME PARENTS THAT SAY THE WILL TAKE THEIR KIDS OUT OF THIS WORLD

BECAUSE THEY BOUGHT THEM IN. NO THEY WONT. THEY ARENT ALLOWED EITHER. YOUR LIFE

DOES NOT BELONG TO YOU ...NOT WHEN IT COMES TO THAT. IF I EVER HEAR OF SOMEONE

ATTEMPTING SUICIDE....I WILL HAVE THEM ARRESTED AND THEY WILL SPEND TIME IN PRISON

WHERE THEY WILL HAVE A REAL REASON TO HARM THEMSELVES!

QUIT TELLING PEOPLE ITS "THEIR CHOICE"

FREAKING WEIRD IDIOTS. NO ITS NOT "THEIR CHOICE"

BUT I UNDERSTAND YOU ARE ALL UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF SATAN AND SUCK HIM OFF
WHENEVER HE NEEDS YOU. WHAT ELSE WOULD YOU SAY? NOTHING OF ANY BRILLANCE THATS OBVIOUS. NOTHING OF ANY INTELLEGENCE.
PLEASE
SHUT UP.

So, the devil made him do it? What a cop-out.



The "whys" will probably never be known, or maybe they will ... we never really know what is in the aftermath of such events.

It's possible that there's a huge tear in the family .. one bigger than his decision to exist this world .. and it's possible that by his deed, his family will be able to see this fracture, and heal themselves BECAUSE of him.

Now wouldn't that be beautiful?

If there's nothing to die for, then there's nothing to live for ... and who knows, maybe his death will make the family realize what they have and embrace it every single day.

You never know how much of an impact you might have on a persons life, sometimes. Don't we see this everyday of our lives? Just today being MLK Day .... we really didn't know yesteryears how profound his legacy really was in years to come.

You just never know ... maybe his death actually saved his family.

It also depends on what his addiction was.

Two years ago (and old-timers will remember this), a dear Gemini girlfriend of mine spent 5 weeks in my home ...... seriously withdrawing from oxycontin. We couldn't put her in re-hab, and her parents were angry at her for being a user and weren't able to understand her plight. My husband and I saw what she went through, and it was horrible ..... violent rages, self pity, uncontrollable vomiting .. the physical pain she endured from not having the oxycontin was so bad that she literally tried to harm herself so that she could feel "something" other than the pain.

I don't think people realize how bad it is to be addicted to a drug that has 100% control over your life. You don't know what you are doing, the only think you know is that if you don't get another fix then you're going to die.

Without her oxycontin ... there was only death .. that's what she thought. She wanted to die every day for weeks.


This needs to be recognized by his family. I don't know what he was addicted to .. but, they need to realize that it isn't because they failed him in some way .. it's because the drug failed him, and his life was at the drugs mercy.

im going to call you what you are pbrain, evil. thats right. you are satans helper
and you are a liar. you never helped anyone and you never helpe a drug addiction and you know nothing about

drug addcition. this is just another one of your bullshit stories. you are on here looking to shine the light on yourself as some kind of helpful soul and you are far frrom it. i who you are.

nothing you described

is the symptoms of drug abuse. when someone is coming off any kind of hydrocodone based

drugs they do not become violent. as a matter of fact, none of the symptoms of drug

withdrawl you described are correct. i think you and your husband and your "friend"

are all full of crap. your "friend" a bullshitter just like you!
it also doesnt take weeks to withdraw and the last thing an addict needs is to be around

is someone like you!

and as far as her not being able to "get" oxycotin" thats very funny. a drug addict

never goes without. they either die of overdose or get locked up but they never go without unlessed forced to and money is not a reason.

*i know who you are

dont make assumptions about people and their backgrounds and their families.

some people are predisposed to endorphined producing rushes; it isnt just drugs its drink and

its food and its sex and its anything that becomes obsessive. you yourself are

addicted to internet. your life is being destroyed around it. you productivity is

diminished and so is your personal life etc. why is that? because you are weak.

you have a problem and so do alot of people like you. takes a strong mind to not

be controlled by substances or endorphine produced rushes of pleasure. we are more

than lab animals. there are those that are covering up emotional problems, granted,

but that is not for you to assume. everybody has "shit" and feelings that they dont

want to deal with. its not the reason for using its the exucse for it. if it wasnt that

it would be something else. its called growing up!

why does your husband have a sex addiction? why dont you address that. you seem to want

to play therapist and make assumptions...

start there and see if you can change him. actually first work on your own problem.

one more thing, you play the hand you are dealt.

if you have problems you still dont get to escape them. taking life isnt going to

be option either. my grandmother, bless her, was paralyzed from wasit down from freak

accident in her late forties!

imagaine be trapped in your own body. you cant go anywhere and you are dependent for

even the basic body functions in life. i also know without her

life would have not been nearly as good for me. she stuck around for me and the others

and we didnt see her as being disabled. thats all we knew. she certainly did as much

as the other adults but we didnt see what she went through. she never let it show.

she was an amazing lady and there are many people just as good and inspirational as she

was. there is another group...the one that is easily prone to feeling sorry for themselves and these are the people the devil loves. these are exactly the people he
needs to carry out his plans.

everyone goes throught pain and suffering and no one escapes that.

and im all for someone going throught withdrawls and cold turkey. they need to remember

what it was like! too many times people skip that part and get offered rehab with a

doctor there to give you something and take you down slowly. no. i dont think so.

they need to go with nothing and most hard core junkies do. they clean up behind bars

and if you want to talk about suffering....let me tell you about it.

let me explain something to you. emotional issues we all have. it is not the

reason an addict uses. its the excuse they use to keep them there. they could say...sally got a red balloon for her first birthday and she got a blue one. that could be reason enough. they use because it feels good. they like the way it makes them feel. simple as that!
they have no idea of boundaries. its a personality trait. like a workaholic etc.

i will tell you

why it has nothing to do with it. if a drug user "addict" aka addictive personality
disorder, cleans up and does not deal with the fact that they are addictive type personality, they will transfer one addictive activity for the next.
i have seen this a thousand times. they will become obsessive about a job or even
helping other addictive person recover to the point they are obsessive again. its never about
what you think it is. its very basic.

you are the typical weak minded and weak willed addictive and co-dependent personality.
your addiciton is the computer and probably unhelathy boundaries with your kids and husband too.

i would say you have a personality disorder yourself. you are addicted to playing

therapist and whatever else you do on the computer all day and everyday. you have

not sturcture or productivity or movement in growing and learning. ive watched off and on

for the last few years while learning about myself and other people. you are classic

example of addictive personality type. you may see yourself as "helpful" but you dont

know what you are doing or talking about and really shouldnt be trying. you need to

understand boundaries and what they are for and how to implement them. in your own life.

HHL~OMG your are too funny...suicide is not a choice that person makes? Drug addiction is not a choice?...what an idiot you are. Who is talking about someone taking anothers life or disabled people? Huh? This is not what this thread is about. And yes, when any addict goes into jail, thats it, done, cold turkey. This is where my sis had siezures from w/d of methadone. Unfortunately, that drug takes months to get out of your system so even after 30 days in jail, her body was still detoxing and her mind was still craving it. Right back to it she went.

And I can tell you she went through hundreds of detoxes/rehabs/halfway houses, we all went to family therapy to try and help her.

PAngel..I totally agree with you.

sophie is obviously a relative of pbrains.

sorry bitch but it donest take a month to get off methadone. i am quite familar with

this "therapy" also. methadone is another syntheitc opiate based drug that is controlled

in doses and given to gradually detox off of opiates. it doesnt take a month to get off

anything. no one knows how long drugs remain in systme or brain. this thrity days you

come up wiht is in accurate. the remainder of your post is incoherent so i cannot comment.

dont come back on here again unless you have some actual expereince with it yourself. i dont want to hear about what your sister or cousin or brother or mother or anyone else
went through. got it? unless you yourself can speak about it than you need to shut up too.

if your family member had seizure than i would say its due to a flaw in your family
gene pool and has nothing to do with the way she was handled in jail or otherwise.
you play you pay and thats the bottom line!

and sophie your sisters mental problems and drug abuse is linked to your own low level of intellegence and weak genes.

people like you(weak links) all operate the same way. all want to blame everyone for their addictiion problems and their addictive personality disorder. she went right back
to using because that is what an addict does and tranfering her from one substance to
anotehr is not going to work! no program is going to work for her until she deals with
her issues. perhaps counseling will work but i doubt it. suffering and tough love is
the only way to help these people. re=read the posts dummy. you are grapsing the message
and you wont because along with your sisters flawed personaliy, you have one yourself.

the only thing that will work for your sister is a controlled environment(jail)
and drug court where she is tested constantly and counseling for her addictive personality problem. she is going to have to want to stop. if she doesnt...jail is
the right place for her. maybe after she realises the consequences of her behaviour
she will smarten up! stop coddling her.

and another thing sophie....if you are registered and on methadone...it doesnt stop
when you go to jail. if you are on it...a nurse comes and gives you your medicince
everyday. so dont try to blow smoke up my ass. if they didnt give them their dose
or missed a dose than they would be medically liable.

i know for a fact they continue treatment even while in jail. "been there done that"

libel= legal. those people in jail have dealt with and seen more and know more

about addicts than you or your family will ever know. if that kid was in protective

segregation/custody and on suicide watch that usually lasts at least 72 hours. they always

hold them for at least 72 hours and there is a good reason for that. if he was

a drug "addict" and they held him for a few days, when they released him he was starting to feel human again!! this is like a huge relife just to have this out of system and
you are hopeful again.
for the first time in a long time and that is not when you are thinking of killing yourself.

you think i am just guessing here and chiming in with my two cents and
making assumptions?
absolutely not. i would never offer up such information that could possibly confuse
or harm someone. i happened to have been through this for twenty almost thirty years.
yes, thirty years! i know what im talking about.

at anyrate, the family is not at fault for his suicide.

and sophie, suicide is a choice but its not legal and if you know someone who is

contemplating and carries it out and you knew about it....your going to jail.

thats no different than assisted suicide.

go to a little legal research. suicide is illegal. just like that guy who tired to
kill himself and slash his wrists recently...he is now is jail. you cannot murder anyone
not even yourself.

not in texas anyways. if you kill yourself in texas, they will revive you and then

put you in electic chair and kill you!


if you a found trying to jump off a tall building and the cops talk you down...

guess where you are going? involuntary boobie hatch!

*if you are found