Cancer sensitivity

Im in love with a great cancer, but I need some advice on how to express that his selfishness or double standards are hurting me without making him feel bad. I wanna keep him forever. He can be so radical when he knows he let you down Anyone got any tricks?

hmm change selfish to self centered: a bit of both
-example he wants household debts 50/50 but household chores 10/90
-he wants to know everything I do, but is very private about himself
-i must set the exmaple for him, but its ok for him to be less than
I want to know who he is. If you ask to much he get clammy sry crabby and defensive
*to much can be anything
We just set our wedding date, a little cold feet here

Little help!!
any would be awesome

glad to see you're in love....if you have that special connection you should definitely try to keep it if he treats you like you'd like MOST of the time.

The good news is that cancer men love a bit of manipulation on average. One of the reasons for it is that with our intuition we are virtually never caught off guard and kind of know what you're doing anyway...so as long as we are getting something that we want out of the deal we'll allow you to continue....we'll even plan dumb like we don't get it if that helps to keep the good stuff coming. Other signs that would be surprised by the manipulation will be more irritated by it...especially the more literal, non-feeling signs that need everything spelled out and aren't good at reading between lines.

Him being both male AND cancer, the biggest bang for the buck will PROBABLY be sexual manipulation. What does he like done to him? Do it often and do it well.....then have a talk with him about this 10/90 chore deal and how it makes you FEEL. cancers are feelers so in your explanation of displeasure he will probably be more sympathetic to the impact on your feelings then any laws of conduct or fairness based on what is taking place...he will see those as subjective and relative. If he cares for you he won't want you to feel bad.

As far as his crabbiness, that will slowly peel back with time. Be patient. It will not come quickly no matter how much he cares for you. I suggest that you relax your expectations of him on that.....keeping them will lead to certain dissapointment.

In general take note of things that make him happy and then spoil him with those things. You will immediatlely be promoted to his best EVER and he will be putty in your hands, agreeing to whatever you wish, once again, to "keep the good stuff comin..."

plan dumb = play dumb

another thing...when I mention "crabbines" I mean his being secretive and guarded.