Question from a Scorpio Woman.....

I have been dating my cancer man for close to 4 months now and things have been very great. I have enjoyed taking the time trying to get to know him, but everyone knows, cancer men aren't the best at showing you who they are immediately, which is fine. As a scorpio woman, I needed to work on my patience anyway =). HOWEVER, I am a bit confused; The time we spend together is amazing, the chemistry is undeniable, he is affectionate, and attentive, but then he goes blank the next day or so. We are always connected via phone, text, etc., so I can't say he disappears, but he is dry with one word answers. I give him his space because I know that is something everyone needs, but I can't lie it throws me off. I am use to being the one chased in a sense and I don't feel like I am chasing him, but I do feel like WTF??!!! We have GREAT times so why does he keep going backwards in a sense??!? Any advice would help, thanks!

I hope you are right, because I really like this guy. But my mom did ways tell me, never put ALL your eggs in one basket. Thank you!

Posted by AneemA08


go look for other "participants" too in your love field, just in case. Lol

Wut? This is not a good idea when it comes to Cancer men. In fact, this is the POLAR opposite of what any women, regardless of sign, should do with a Cancer man. Almost all the Cancers I know, and deal with, don't open up until you show consistency and loyalty. Once that happens, they open up and you are part of their inner circle. Her having options, and doing what you suggest, will not show that to him.

Posted by AneemA08
You may have been vindicated, scorp. As simple as that.

Give him all the space he needs. 😉

go look for other "participants" too in your love field, just in case. Lol

He's not an air sign. This may be possible with Aqua and Gemini (not really with Libra), but I would not recommend this with water sign, especially not with Cancer.

Just to clarify, giving a cancer space does not equate to going off and looking for other possible replacements.

The fastest way to get rid of a Cardinal Sun is to give them the impression that 'they are not good enough' for you.

Although I have had opportunities to explore my options, I dont want to. Even though I am confused, I am so just as certain that I like a lot about him. I just want to make sure I am not reading him wrong because I know cancers have their ways of going backwards and sideways. Is there a way to tell if he is truly as interested though? I am more than willing to be patient, and to learn him a bit more, but I also dont want to be oblivious and get my feelings hurt.

Posted by sscorpio734
Although I have had opportunities to explore my options, I dont want to. Even though I am confused, I am so just as certain that I like a lot about him. I just want to make sure I am not reading him wrong because I know cancers have their ways of going backwards and sideways. Is there a way to tell if he is truly as interested though? I am more than willing to be patient, and to learn him a bit more, but I also dont want to be oblivious and get my feelings hurt.

Only advice I can give is to give him time. He may have his reasons for his crabwalk, but it doesn't necessarily have anything to do with you.

Posted by sscorpio734
Although I have had opportunities to explore my options, I dont want to. Even though I am confused, I am so just as certain that I like a lot about him. I just want to make sure I am not reading him wrong because I know cancers have their ways of going backwards and sideways. Is there a way to tell if he is truly as interested though? I am more than willing to be patient, and to learn him a bit more, but I also dont want to be oblivious and get my feelings hurt.

Don't get neurotic when he seems distant, they just do that. My two "brothers" are Cancers, and the man I have been dealing on and off with for the past 2 years, is one as well. They all become what I call "professional" when corresponding from time to time when they are dealing with stress in their lives. It's just who they are. Don't let your head get to you, and make crazy assumptions.

Posted by sscorpio734
I hope you are right, because I really like this guy. But my mom did ways tell me, never put ALL your eggs in one basket. Thank you!

If there's one basket you'd ever want to put all your eggs in, it's love...unless of course you're not serious about the whole thing.

Posted by nikkistar

Posted by sscorpio734
Although I have had opportunities to explore my options, I dont want to. Even though I am confused, I am so just as certain that I like a lot about him. I just want to make sure I am not reading him wrong because I know cancers have their ways of going backwards and sideways. Is there a way to tell if he is truly as interested though? I am more than willing to be patient, and to learn him a bit more, but I also dont want to be oblivious and get my feelings hurt.

Don't get neurotic when he seems distant, they just do that. My two "brothers" are Cancers, and the man I have been dealing on and off with for the past 2 years, is one as well. They all become what I call "professional" when corresponding from time to time when they are dealing with stress in their lives. It's just who they are. Don't let your head get to you, and make crazy assumptions.

click to expand

Ok! LOL, it's my first time dating a cancer, so I appreciate all these jewels you are dropping! I will get out of my own head.

Posted by AneemA08

Posted by nikkistar

Posted by AneemA08


go look for other "participants" too in your love field, just in case. Lol

Wut? This is not a good idea when it comes to Cancer men. In fact, this is the POLAR opposite of what any women, regardless of sign, should do with a Cancer man. Almost all the Cancers I know, and deal with, don't open up until you show consistency and loyalty. Once that happens, they open up and you are part of their inner circle. Her having options, and doing what you suggest, will not show that to him.

I know that but op said that it had been great, so why retracted?

Is that some sort of a test then?

click to expand

Not a test.

They just want to do their own thing from time to time and not always seem 'joined at the hip' with someone else. It's a Cardinal sun thing.

Posted by Teena

Posted by sscorpio734
I hope you are right, because I really like this guy. But my mom did ways tell me, never put ALL your eggs in one basket. Thank you!

If there's one basket you'd ever want to put all your eggs in, it's love...unless of course you're not serious about the whole thing.

click to expand

No, you are absolutely right.

Posted by AneemA08

Posted by nikkistar

Posted by AneemA08


go look for other "participants" too in your love field, just in case. Lol

Wut? This is not a good idea when it comes to Cancer men. In fact, this is the POLAR opposite of what any women, regardless of sign, should do with a Cancer man. Almost all the Cancers I know, and deal with, don't open up until you show consistency and loyalty. Once that happens, they open up and you are part of their inner circle. Her having options, and doing what you suggest, will not show that to him.

I know that but op said that it had been great, so why retracted?

Is that some sort of a test then?

click to expand

No where in her initial post did she say "had", it says have.

And yes, Cancer men do test, but the communication part isn't a "test". It is simply them, needing their time to deal with whatever issue it is they are currently dealing with. 9/10 times, it has nothing to do with the person they are talking to, and everything to do with them sorting something out. Of the 3 Cancer men I know well, each HATE texting, and one HATES the phone period. But all 3, will eventually respond to me, or pick up immediately when I call, because I am in their inner circle.

Example 1: Bestfriend 1, yesterday told me that I am of 3 people that he will pick up the phone for no matter what

Example 2: Bestfriend 2, same as bestfriend 1, and answers my texts though he hasn't even answered texts from people DAYS ago.

Example 3: Cancer man, disappeared on me for 3 hours last night, no calls or texts (usually answers immediately) Found out later, he was at his parents house and something happened to his little sister and he was worried.

Posted by sscorpio734
I have been dating my cancer man for close to 4 months now and things have been very great. I have enjoyed taking the time trying to get to know him, but everyone knows, cancer men aren't the best at showing you who they are immediately, which is fine. As a scorpio woman, I needed to work on my patience anyway =). HOWEVER, I am a bit confused; The time we spend together is amazing, the chemistry is undeniable, he is affectionate, and attentive, but then he goes blank the next day or so. We are always connected via phone, text, etc., so I can't say he disappears, but he is dry with one word answers. I give him his space because I know that is something everyone needs, but I can't lie it throws me off. I am use to being the one chased in a sense and I don't feel like I am chasing him, but I do feel like WTF??!!! We have GREAT times so why does he keep going backwards in a sense??!? Any advice would help, thanks!

I'm not sure how to respond to you. Normally I would say that if a cancer isn't chasing you, even if in side ways, that means that he isn't interested (most of cancers that I know including myself are chasers). But if it has been going on for some time and if you have a great time, I'm not sure. There might be something else in his life blocking it. Or he thinks that you need space and in his mind he is giving that to you. I do that quite a lot if I think that the other person needs time, even though I might be burning inside to text her. Are you exclusive in any sense or he is dating other people?

Posted by AneemA08

Posted by Ram416

Posted by AneemA08
You may have been vindicated, scorp. As simple as that.

Give him all the space he needs. 😉

go look for other "participants" too in your love field, just in case. Lol

He's not an air sign. This may be possible with Aqua and Gemini (not really with Libra), but I would not recommend this with water sign, especially not with Cancer.

Just to clarify, giving a cancer space does not equate to going off and looking for other possible replacements.

The fastest way to get rid of a Cardinal Sun is to give them the impression that 'they are not good enough' for you.

Yea well if he does want consistency, he also has to show it too.

I'm a cancer moon, but my libra placement reigns too.

Cancers... Afaik they will have their space to find themselves good conditions to show up again. But it has been only 4 months. We can't be sure he has gone that deep within the allocated amount of time. Especially with cancers as Nikki says it.

click to expand

Almost nothing in life is ever 100% guaranteed, my dear Scorpio friend.

Only death and taxes have that.

And yes it has only been 4 months, but how sure are we that he isn't already emotionally invested? It's why I suggested to give him time.

Posted by AneemA08

Posted by Ram416

Posted by AneemA08
You may have been vindicated, scorp. As simple as that.

Give him all the space he needs. 😉

go look for other "participants" too in your love field, just in case. Lol

He's not an air sign. This may be possible with Aqua and Gemini (not really with Libra), but I would not recommend this with water sign, especially not with Cancer.

Just to clarify, giving a cancer space does not equate to going off and looking for other possible replacements.

The fastest way to get rid of a Cardinal Sun is to give them the impression that 'they are not good enough' for you.

Yea well if he does want consistency, he also has to show it too.

I'm a cancer moon, but my libra placement reigns too.

Cancers... Afaik they will have their space to find themselves good conditions to show up again. But it has been only 4 months. We can't be sure he has gone that deep within the allocated amount of time. Especially with cancers as Nikki says it.

click to expand

See, that is all new for me as well. I am noticing that he does like to pace himself. My cancer male friend did tell me that the more he starts to like me, the more he will do the crab like behavior because he wants to make sure before jumping into something wholeheartedly. You guys are really helping me piece some things together.

Posted by AneemA08
But it has been only 4 months. We can't be sure he has gone that deep within the allocated amount of time. Especially with cancers as Nikki says it.

Not sure if its my dynamic with them, but all 3 Cancers I deal with daily, knew I would be someone in their life long term from the get go. Hell one of my bestfriends now, I didn't really start talking to consistently until 5 or 6 months ago, and he considers me family now.

I met Cancer man's mom and family, 5 months into dating.

So 4 months, for a Cancer, can be enough time.

Posted by AneemA08

Posted by nikkistar

Posted by AneemA08
But it has been only 4 months. We can't be sure he has gone that deep within the allocated amount of time. Especially with cancers as Nikki says it.

Not sure if its my dynamic with them, but all 3 Cancers I deal with daily, knew I would be someone in their life long term from the get go. Hell one of my bestfriends now, I didn't really start talking to consistently until 5 or 6 months ago, and he considers me family now.

I met Cancer man's mom and family, 5 months into dating.

So 4 months, for a Cancer, can be enough time.

Yes, I trust my cancer woman/coworker and women/online friends here. Irl I haven't found as many lol

click to expand

Same, but I can tell you all 3 of the Cancers I deal with, have all disappeared on me at some point in regards to communication. lol

Posted by nikkistar

Posted by AneemA08
But it has been only 4 months. We can't be sure he has gone that deep within the allocated amount of time. Especially with cancers as Nikki says it.

Not sure if its my dynamic with them, but all 3 Cancers I deal with daily, knew I would be someone in their life long term from the get go. Hell one of my bestfriends now, I didn't really start talking to consistently until 5 or 6 months ago, and he considers me family now.

I met Cancer man's mom and family, 5 months into dating.

So 4 months, for a Cancer, can be enough time.

click to expand

I agree with you on this point. I usually know from day one if I'm going to be friends with you. Relationships wise it's a bit more inconsistent, sometimes I don't see it coming. But 90% of the times I know if I want to be friends/lover with you, most of the times it's waiting for the others to understand the same!

Posted by nikkistar

Posted by AneemA08

Posted by nikkistar

Posted by AneemA08


go look for other "participants" too in your love field, just in case. Lol

Wut? This is not a good idea when it comes to Cancer men. In fact, this is the POLAR opposite of what any women, regardless of sign, should do with a Cancer man. Almost all the Cancers I know, and deal with, don't open up until you show consistency and loyalty. Once that happens, they open up and you are part of their inner circle. Her having options, and doing what you suggest, will not show that to him.

I know that but op said that it had been great, so why retracted?

Is that some sort of a test then?

No where in her initial post did she say "had", it says have.

And yes, Cancer men do test, but the communication part isn't a "test". It is simply them, needing their time to deal with whatever issue it is they are currently dealing with. 9/10 times, it has nothing to do with the person they are talking to, and everything to do with them sorting something out. Of the 3 Cancer men I know well, each HATE texting, and one HATES the phone period. But all 3, will eventually respond to me, or pick up immediately when I call, because I am in their inner circle.

Example 1: Bestfriend 1, yesterday told me that I am of 3 people that he will pick up the phone for no matter what

Example 2: Bestfriend 2, same as bestfriend 1, and answers my texts though he hasn't even answered texts from people DAYS ago.

Example 3: Cancer man, disappeared on me for 3 hours last night, no calls or texts (usually answers immediately) Found out later, he was at his parents house and something happened to his little sister and he was worried.

click to expand

I think you are right, girl. He has asked me twice within the last month, for me to promise that I will always be in his life, And that he wants to make sure I am not going anywhere, and I will be there through thick and thin. I had to ask him like, "are you friendzoning me??" LOL, but he answered no as if I was offending him, and that I read that all wrong. I think he is trying to feel me out when it comes to loyalty.

Posted by carrazeda

Posted by sscorpio734
I have been dating my cancer man for close to 4 months now and things have been very great. I have enjoyed taking the time trying to get to know him, but everyone knows, cancer men aren't the best at showing you who they are immediately, which is fine. As a scorpio woman, I needed to work on my patience anyway =). HOWEVER, I am a bit confused; The time we spend together is amazing, the chemistry is undeniable, he is affectionate, and attentive, but then he goes blank the next day or so. We are always connected via phone, text, etc., so I can't say he disappears, but he is dry with one word answers. I give him his space because I know that is something everyone needs, but I can't lie it throws me off. I am use to being the one chased in a sense and I don't feel like I am chasing him, but I do feel like WTF??!!! We have GREAT times so why does he keep going backwards in a sense??!? Any advice would help, thanks!

I'm not sure how to respond to you. Normally I would say that if a cancer isn't chasing you, even if in side ways, that means that he isn't interested (most of cancers that I know including myself are chasers). But if it has been going on for some time and if you have a great time, I'm not sure. There might be something else in his life blocking it. Or he thinks that you need space and in his mind he is giving that to you. I do that quite a lot if I think that the other person needs time, even though I might be burning inside to text her. Are you exclusive in any sense or he is dating other people?

click to expand

We established earlier that we would give one another the chance to see where this goes just us, but we are not in an exclusive relationship YET, at least we havent established it verbally. But he calls me babe in public and around all our friends, and he stated to me Sunday that as long as the people in our lives knows what we are, then thats all that matters because we both despise people in our personal business. Confusing right?

Posted by Ram416

Posted by AneemA08

Posted by Ram416

Posted by AneemA08
You may have been vindicated, scorp. As simple as that.

Give him all the space he needs. 😉

go look for other "participants" too in your love field, just in case. Lol

He's not an air sign. This may be possible with Aqua and Gemini (not really with Libra), but I would not recommend this with water sign, especially not with Cancer.

Just to clarify, giving a cancer space does not equate to going off and looking for other possible replacements.

The fastest way to get rid of a Cardinal Sun is to give them the impression that 'they are not good enough' for you.

Yea well if he does want consistency, he also has to show it too.

I'm a cancer moon, but my libra placement reigns too.

Cancers... Afaik they will have their space to find themselves good conditions to show up again. But it has been only 4 months. We can't be sure he has gone that deep within the allocated amount of time. Especially with cancers as Nikki says it.

Almost nothing in life is ever 100% guaranteed, my dear Scorpio friend.

Only death and taxes have that.

And yes it has only been 4 months, but how sure are we that he isn't already emotionally invested? It's why I suggested to give him time.

click to expand

I agree, I can be more patient. I think he is invested emotionally.

Posted by sscorpio734

Posted by nikkistar

Posted by AneemA08

Posted by nikkistar

Posted by AneemA08


go look for other "participants" too in your love field, just in case. Lol

Wut? This is not a good idea when it comes to Cancer men. In fact, this is the POLAR opposite of what any women, regardless of sign, should do with a Cancer man. Almost all the Cancers I know, and deal with, don't open up until you show consistency and loyalty. Once that happens, they open up and you are part of their inner circle. Her having options, and doing what you suggest, will not show that to him.

I know that but op said that it had been great, so why retracted?

Is that some sort of a test then?

No where in her initial post did she say "had", it says have.

And yes, Cancer men do test, but the communication part isn't a "test". It is simply them, needing their time to deal with whatever issue it is they are currently dealing with. 9/10 times, it has nothing to do with the person they are talking to, and everything to do with them sorting something out. Of the 3 Cancer men I know well, each HATE texting, and one HATES the phone period. But all 3, will eventually respond to me, or pick up immediately when I call, because I am in their inner circle.

Example 1: Bestfriend 1, yesterday told me that I am of 3 people that he will pick up the phone for no matter what

Example 2: Bestfriend 2, same as bestfriend 1, and answers my texts though he hasn't even answered texts from people DAYS ago.

Example 3: Cancer man, disappeared on me for 3 hours last night, no calls or texts (usually answers immediately) Found out later, he was at his parents house and something happened to his little sister and he was worried.

I think you are right, girl. He has asked me twice within the last month, for me to promise that I will always be in his life, And that he wants to make sure I am not going anywhere, and I will be there through thick and thin. I had to ask him like, "are you friendzoning me??" LOL, but he answered no as if I was offending him, and that I read that all wrong. I think he is trying to feel me out when it comes to loyalty.

click to expand

I want to say that not ALL Cancer men exhibit this behavior, but the majority of the ones I am directly privy to, do this.

It's honestly just showing consistency, that they can depend on you. lol

I want to say that not ALL Cancer men exhibit this behavior, but the majority of the ones I am directly privy to, do this.

It's honestly just showing consistency, that they can depend on you. lol





Ok, bet. Girl, you are going to have me coasting this thing out. Thanks for talking me off the ledge. I think our cancers are very similiar. It does help too that we are all in the same circle of friends, so he already considers me family off the strength of that. Just wanted the inside scoop to make sure I don't hurt my cancer boo.