Taurus woman pulling away from a cancer man

I've been dating this cancer guy for 5 months. He has committment issues. So things have been moving at a slow pace. I'm ok with that. Ive been holding back. He told me to open up to him . I did. I told him i love him. Since then he has been a lil distant and a lil cold. Ive talked to him about it. He says that he's ok. This is taking a toll on me. This is emotionally damaging to me. Im begining to realize that i need to pull away from him. Its hard bc i love him but i need to do it for my emotional sanity. Do i get distant and pull away or do i tell him.

Would love to hear people's comments on this, anybody?

Do you know what his commitment issues are? Because the guy I talk to (just passed one year) goes really, really slow. I mean, there are obstacles to our relationship, but it doesn't matter - he told me he goes slow, and also retreats sometimes. He wasn't joking, for sure.

It does take a toll. I'm not a Cancer so I can't say anything about what is on his mind, but with my friend, I see that he gets validation and likes to know how I feel, and can''t talk easily about how he feels. It's frustrating for him to articulate. When he does, he pulls away. I've gotten used to it. It can be very frustrating to give more than you get but you just have to decide if you can live like that.

I usually don't do this buuut I'm high now so I can tolerate high levels of messiness at the moment..

Okay a couple things...

1 - I don't believe in ANYONE having commitment issues I see them as people who haven't found that person that gives them a burst of inner warmth/joy/excitement . Basically he could be interested but not interested enough to take that leap without going through his other options.
See: Stringing along.

2 - In what world does moving slow = making love declarations...especially after five months of dating. No titles, yeah? Am I right?

3 - He wants you to open up to him. That means tell him more about you, your day, family, goals, biggest wishes, or scariest dreams & so on. Saying I love you so quick would make any sane person run. You're emotionally messy & easy. Pull yourself together.

4 - You're emotionally damaged? Blame yourself. He's keeping you at a arms length and you say "Okay yeah, I hear you." and do the exact opposite and run forward.

This is why I don't believe Taurus are good for Cancers.
You all like us way too much from the jump and act like a bull in a China when you don't get your way - when and how you want it.
You just hear what you want and don't respect a Cancers word.


But regardless he seems interested in you but nowhere near in love like you seem to be.
But don't tell him you're going to leave him and think he's going to welcome you back with open arms when you decide to return.
You don't have that power over him that you would probably have with a Cap or Pisces male for instance.
Those guys will go along to the beat of your Taurean drum, (But Pisces might rebel here and there though when they don't get what they want enough)

Once someone shows or tells me that basically don't value me in their life in any way they'll never see me in their life and they're as good as dead to me.

Find you emotional centre and make it yours. Yours enough so that no one can shake it.
You´d better leave. Really. You may think you´re in love with this man and the feeling is true, BUT what it´s based on is not necessarily so. What did he give you for you to give your heart to this man?
You're currently giving much more than receiving. That's not sane.
I've recently had the same situation with cancer. He said he's not ready. Not enough man for me. Ok, I accepted that and said i wouldn't be satisfied with less than I deserve. It was difficult. Still not over him. But I try and eventually will.
Wish you well. Respect your inner feeling. Does this 'relationship' make you happier than you were before? No? It's not your thing.

Posted by Pearls
I usually don't do this buuut I'm high now so I can tolerate high levels of messiness at the moment..

Okay a couple things...

1 - I don't believe in ANYONE having commitment issues I see them as people who haven't found that person that gives them a burst of inner warmth/joy/excitement . Basically he could be interested but not interested enough to take that leap without going through his other options.
See: Stringing along.

2 - In what world does moving slow = making love declarations...especially after five months of dating. No titles, yeah? Am I right?

3 - He wants you to open up to him. That means tell him more about you, your day, family, goals, biggest wishes, or scariest dreams & so on. Saying I love you so quick would make any sane person run. You're emotionally messy & easy. Pull yourself together.

4 - You're emotionally damaged? Blame yourself. He's keeping you at a arms length and you say "Okay yeah, I hear you." and do the exact opposite and run forward.

Thank you Pearls, for your input. I dont agree with being emotionally messy. You are entitled to your opinion. I needed to hear that .

Posted by TaurusMarine
Find you emotional centre and make it yours. Yours enough so that no one can shake it.
You´d better leave. Really. You may think you´re in love with this man and the feeling is true, BUT what it´s based on is not necessarily so. What did he give you for you to give your heart to this man?
You're currently giving much more than receiving. That's not sane.
I've recently had the same situation with cancer. He said he's not ready. Not enough man for me. Ok, I accepted that and said i wouldn't be satisfied with less than I deserve. It was difficult. Still not over him. But I try and eventually will.
Wish you well. Respect your inner feeling. Does this 'relationship' make you happier than you were before? No? It's not your thing.

Thank you TaurusMarine. Its definately not my thing.

Posted by mangomania

Posted by TaurusMarine
Find you emotional centre and make it yours. Yours enough so that no one can shake it.
You´d better leave. Really. You may think you´re in love with this man and the feeling is true, BUT what it´s based on is not necessarily so. What did he give you for you to give your heart to this man?
You're currently giving much more than receiving. That's not sane.
I've recently had the same situation with cancer. He said he's not ready. Not enough man for me. Ok, I accepted that and said i wouldn't be satisfied with less than I deserve. It was difficult. Still not over him. But I try and eventually will.
Wish you well. Respect your inner feeling. Does this 'relationship' make you happier than you were before? No? It's not your thing.

Thank you TaurusMarine. Its definately not my thing.

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I'm glad you have decided that yourself.

Life is short....grieve and move on and keep dating....he doesn't need to know that unless he is committed to you. You need,a guy you can be sure of .....not some drip waiting for the grass to get greener.....Lotta losers out there....a real man knows what he wants....forget the she males. ....not worth it. I swear men just don't seem to be men anymore....lots of women are really getting bored and just getting a loyal dog....sad but true. Romance is dead...

Ask God for a,real man....a Christian who will treat ypu right....if a man doesn't love God first he won't know how to love ypu and be faithful and supportive....these drips put there don't know how to treat a woman because they are women themselves.

Life is short....grieve and move on and keep dating....he doesn't need to know that unless he is committed to you. You need,a guy you can be sure of .....not some drip waiting for the grass to get greener.....Lotta losers out there....a real man knows what he wants....forget the she males. ....not worth it. I swear men just don't seem to be men anymore....lots of women are really getting bored and just getting a loyal dog....sad but true. Romance is dead...