what wud you want someone to do in this situation

I am a pisces girl and he's a cancer guy. We are in a LDR and it's never been an issue for us. We are committed,trusting,happy with each other and have spent wonderful time online and on the phone. It's been great but things have been bit rocky for about a month now. He's been emotionally distant and unavailable. He has been insensitive towards my feelings and absentminded. We havent made love for many weeks (we have cyber sex because of our LDR) and we'd have our time at least 4-5 times a month but he has lost interest from intimacy for a month now . We tried it once 2 weeks ago but he lost interest midway so we had to stop which caused some arguments. He has been very irritated and we end up fighting over little things too often off late.Talks have also reduced.He is aware of his behavior.We spoke about it and he told me that he's been thinking off a lot of things lately. He said they aren't very serious issues but they just hit his head and get him thinking too much and this has been going on for too long.He told me that he hates his current task at work and his mobile operator issue and many other silly things.He assured me that it's just a phase which would get over with time,it has got nothing to do with me and that he still loves me the same and this wouldnt affect our relationship. I believe him but the fact that he isnt invested as before pricks me hard at times.We had our first anniversary 2 days ago.We spoke for about an hr and a half on phone in the afternoon and that went very good.Then we played an online game at night which was good but he was also focused chatting with his friend(a guy).He said he lost the game from me because he was focused more in the friend. I dont want to appear clingy but i felt bit hurt and i told him that he could have paid good attention on us at least during our special day.He said he's just happy that we had a good talk on phone. He then asked me to not get angry and sentimental.I behaved fine,chatted for 2 min more and then he went off to sleep.Even I have a hectic job,i am a student and i have a good social circle but I still balance things so that i get enough time for our relationship too.I take out time for us because i know it's equally important.
I understand that he's probably going through an annoying phase right now but I don't understand what should i do. I wanna be there for him but don't know if i should stick to him the way i do or should i get distant,let him miss me and then have him come back?

how old are you two?

give him space a man who is getting his life in order as far as financial stability, career, and other proiorieties in order can't put you first and also they are physcial creatures only LDR can go so long before it runs it's course. You guys need to talk about living in the same area eventually.

for now focus on you and spend time with your friends stay busy and let him call you and come to you.

*priorities

Posted by Octoberbaby91
how old are you two?

give him space a man who is getting his life in order as far as financial stability, career, and other proiorieties in order can't put you first and also they are physcial creatures only LDR can go so long before it runs it's course. You guys need to talk about living in the same area eventually.

for now focus on you and spend time with your friends stay busy and let him call you and come to you.

i am 23 he'd be 24 in July. I am not asking him to prioritize me. Like I said,even I have a solid job and I am a student as well.My academics is my first priority. Even I emotionally detach myself from people when I have an exam pressure or when there's some pressure in the office.However,I don't let it go on for too long because it's not healthy.Also,I knew someone would bring up the physical aspect of the relationship but we have talked about it. He respects my decision of not being physical(as in sex) in person until we get married. Also,he himself keeps telling me that he's loves the fact that our relationship isn't based on the physical aspects but purely on the emotional and mental connection.We did talk about our future together many a times. Our families know that we are in a relationship with each other.His mom and I even wished each other on the phone during New year. And no,we haven't met yet because I left the country for college before he could meet me. We plan to meet when I come home during summer.We have talked about him finding a job in the US(where I am) in the same city after he crosses 26.

I meant physical as in living in the same place not sex. That's great that you choose to not have sex BUT he is still a man just because you choose not to doesn't mean he will give sex up. You can say all day long he understands and what ever else he tells you what you want to hear but realistically men don't just stop having sex unless they choose to on their own given time to wait til marriage not just because YOU decided it.

Also okay that's great that you talked about it but its time to put moving together in ACTION because as I stated before men need your physical presence before he start to roam elsewhere.

That's great that you have you proprieties in order so you should have no problem giving him space. You don't have to put up with his negativity in the process just simply do you until he stops taking his frustrations or guilt out on you.

So he will be moving to the states in 2 years? Hmm might be keeping his options open and trying to pick fights out of guilt to be very honest with you.

You both are young be careful and protect your heart dear.

We both are virgins and he told me that he believes in chastity too. So i feel secure about him 😛 Also,he doesn't have a huge sex drive(at the moment,atleast). Rather I am the one who seduces him to talk sensual 😛
He isn't firm on moving in by 26 because it depends on many things. It's a plan he has but plans do change. Also, he's a Cancerian so his mood swings are intense anyway. He has always wanted to work in Europe but he said he'd be happy to work in US if that brings us closer. We love each other very much. We trust each other when we say we do. It's just that his ability to overthink even the most trivial of issues has made him absent minded,emotionally detached and insensitive since february end. I told him let's have our sexy time on our anniversary but he wasn't up for it."I fear I might abruptly sleep" is what he usually says these days when i try for some intimacy. Oh well,you could then start bit earlier,right? Something's wrong with his libido because of his overthinking lol.We still talk as before but the quantity and the quality has reduced a bit.

Sometimes I feel i should conspicuously distant myself from him.Maybe then he'd notice and realize that his prolonged ill behavior isn't being fair on me and he needs to get back to normal. But at the same time I fear if distancing myself would have any sort of negative impact. I know it wouldnt kill the love but staying well connected is what strengthens a relationship. Such a dilemma.