Capricorn woman suddenly stops everything

Ok, I m a Capricorn like her, we ve been together for a month, everything was perfect than suddenly over the night she went cold, distant. I have talked with her, her main goal is to pass an important exam, she failed it the 1st time. She said to me that she felt like she is getting close to me, feel smth for me and then she stopped this because she can t hadle studying and having a relationship now. She told me I am the perfect guy for her and a relationship but it s too much for her now and she dont wanna hurt me because she is damn stressed, in every aspect and she want to be alone. What are the chances for this decision to come out wrong? For her to realize she need me. I told her, if she feels that she is regreting this, she can always come around and she said yes. What am I gonna do next? Stop texting? I know if someone ignore me I m starting to realize that I made a sh*t. She need someone to take care of her, being alone is not a fix, her mood is very bad lately, I know by being a Cap.

I'm a Cap woman. Don't completely disappear but also understand she's stressed right now and needs to focus on her test. You shoukd know this being a Cap yourself. We hate to fail.

If the roles were reversed, how would you like her to be? Think of it from her point of view and do what you would want the other person to do.

The thing is I am a Cap but I will never do that, I can find a way for everything without sacrifice someone.She told me great things, did that too, we were talking everyday, sweet words then overnight things went down.Her test is in June 🙂 Honesly, by being a Cap, I will never shut the feelings down, I was in her situation and I had a relationship( 2 years) and I have managed to make them both and also I know we can manage to make this too but she is stubborn, she is complaining about being tired, she is always sleeping, or studying, she is very impulsive with her family too.
Yes, she knew about this test but this didn't stopped her to start smth with me, yes she told me I need to have petience at the start, so this decision came almost overnight that's why I'm asking if I need to detach a little to make her come back, not rushing her by texting. I'm thiking of reversing the process, decision came overnight so regret might come overnight, she was totally different when we were okay.
I know the Cap deal, she is 90% like me but she got some weir behavior I don't understand.Shut down the feeling?Are they gone or still there and remained at that certain level? I wonder if they will count

Posted by GNGC
The thing is I am a Cap but I will never do that, I can find a way for everything without sacrifice someone.She told me great things, did that too, we were talking everyday, sweet words then overnight things went down.Her test is in June 🙂 Honesly, by being a Cap, I will never shut the feelings down, I was in her situation and I had a relationship( 2 years) and I have managed to make them both and also I know we can manage to make this too but she is stubborn, she is complaining about being tired, she is always sleeping, or studying, she is very impulsive with her family too.
Yes, she knew about this test but this didn't stopped her to start smth with me, yes she told me I need to have petience at the start, so this decision came almost overnight that's why I'm asking if I need to detach a little to make her come back, not rushing her by texting. I'm thiking of reversing the process, decision came overnight so regret might come overnight, she was totally different when we were okay.
I know the Cap deal, she is 90% like me but she got some weir behavior I don't understand.Shut down the feeling?Are they gone or still there and remained at that certain level? I wonder if they will count

She seems really stressed out, her mental/emotional capacity has reached its max. She's busy either studying or sleeping. So she's focused on this test, and wants nothing to distract her. Just check in on her, give her words of support. Once this is overwith, she will be her old self. Try not to be pessimistic abiut it.

Wow, her test is in June? So it's expected to be patient until then?

I can relate to cutting people off when stressed. I'm doing it now, and I should have done it earlier....just to focus on getting past this hump. Its pretty extreme, and I wonder how this behavior works in a longterm relationship or marriage, but it appears to be VERY necessary every once in a while.

Just let her be. Obviously she cant extend herself in the way youd like right now, and there is nothing you can do about it. We are very stubborn and feel we know what's best for ourselves in this situation. ANY and everything can suck up our energy, including the thoughts of not being fair or available to someone.

If you like her give her time, or atleast give yourself a limit. Like if she doesn't come around in a few weeks, slowly move on.

She wants someone else's attention. Move on its not worth waiting for. She wants you on the backburner, dont be that guy. If you are the perfect guy as she says then you canbe someone who helps her through this challenging part of her life. She wants the options and idea of you, not necessarily you. Dont be someones back up plan. She will understand what she is losing out on one way, and that is you moving on and cutting ties.

Posted by Westsidekodak

Posted by GNGC
Ok, I m a Capricorn like her, we ve been together for a month, everything was perfect than suddenly over the night she went cold, distant. I have talked with her, her main goal is to pass an important exam, she failed it the 1st time. She said to me that she felt like she is getting close to me, feel smth for me and then she stopped this because she can t hadle studying and having a relationship now. She told me I am the perfect guy for her and a relationship but it s too much for her now and she dont wanna hurt me because she is damn stressed, in every aspect and she want to be alone. What are the chances for this decision to come out wrong? For her to realize she need me. I told her, if she feels that she is regreting this, she can always come around and she said yes. What am I gonna do next? Stop texting? I know if someone ignore me I m starting to realize that I made a sh*t. She need someone to take care of her, being alone is not a fix, her mood is very bad lately, I know by being a Cap.

You're delusional. But its ok your in the land of delusional cat ladies. Welcome. Want me to read yours and hers birth chart to figure out your best plan of attack to get her to give you attention?

click to expand

Delusional? Who's the manipulative one trying to play with people's emotions...

Best to play games on your own thread...adults only here.

Posted by Westsidekodak

Posted by GNGC
Ok, I m a Capricorn like her, we ve been together for a month, everything was perfect than suddenly over the night she went cold, distant. I have talked with her, her main goal is to pass an important exam, she failed it the 1st time. She said to me that she felt like she is getting close to me, feel smth for me and then she stopped this because she can t hadle studying and having a relationship now. She told me I am the perfect guy for her and a relationship but it s too much for her now and she dont wanna hurt me because she is damn stressed, in every aspect and she want to be alone. What are the chances for this decision to come out wrong? For her to realize she need me. I told her, if she feels that she is regreting this, she can always come around and she said yes. What am I gonna do next? Stop texting? I know if someone ignore me I m starting to realize that I made a sh*t. She need someone to take care of her, being alone is not a fix, her mood is very bad lately, I know by being a Cap.

You're delusional. But its ok your in the land of delusional cat ladies. Welcome. Want me to read yours and hers birth chart to figure out your best plan of attack to get her to give you attention?

click to expand

...and you're not an attention whore? Giving advice on how to be an attention whore....

Posted by Westsidekodak

Posted by Greentea

Posted by Westsidekodak

Posted by GNGC
Ok, I m a Capricorn like her, we ve been together for a month, everything was perfect than suddenly over the night she went cold, distant. I have talked with her, her main goal is to pass an important exam, she failed it the 1st time. She said to me that she felt like she is getting close to me, feel smth for me and then she stopped this because she can t hadle studying and having a relationship now. She told me I am the perfect guy for her and a relationship but it s too much for her now and she dont wanna hurt me because she is damn stressed, in every aspect and she want to be alone. What are the chances for this decision to come out wrong? For her to realize she need me. I told her, if she feels that she is regreting this, she can always come around and she said yes. What am I gonna do next? Stop texting? I know if someone ignore me I m starting to realize that I made a sh*t. She need someone to take care of her, being alone is not a fix, her mood is very bad lately, I know by being a Cap.

You're delusional. But its ok your in the land of delusional cat ladies. Welcome. Want me to read yours and hers birth chart to figure out your best plan of attack to get her to give you attention?

...and you're not an attention whore? Giving advice on how to be an attention whore....

Ahh Cat lady number one. State your sun sign and reasons for owning 3 cats and no boyfriend.

click to expand

Is this your way of instigating again little biy because you're bored? If your girl only knew of what a piece of shit guy you are. A cancer 2 trying to be a cancer 1.

Please, if you want to fight go somewhere else, no offence, my situation is not a battlefield. I need rational opinions based on experience, not some rage against womans/capricorn womans.

elguapolibra @ no, she's not an attention seeker, nothing fits. She isolated herself, she plan to close her fb and respond only to few closed friends (me included) , I know her friends and how hard to get is she, she was pretty amazed by me/my mind, she got some serious trust issues based on her 1st relationship, I am her 2nd. She got freaked out because I was getting close to her too fast. Anyway, when girl try to get rid of someone in a nice way, they say "I wish you will find someone" , she didnt.Actually, she seemed pretty hurt by this decision.

And also, whenever I was trying to explain her why is this wrong she came out saying "I dont know what to say"..so she is confused in my opinion.

Posted by GNGC
Please, if you want to fight go somewhere else, no offence, my situation is not a battlefield. I need rational opinions based on experience, not some rage against womans/capricorn womans.

elguapolibra @ no, she's not an attention seeker, nothing fits. She isolated herself, she plan to close her fb and respond only to few closed friends (me included) , I know her friends and how hard to get is she, she was pretty amazed by me/my mind, she got some serious trust issues based on her 1st relationship, I am her 2nd. She got freaked out because I was getting close to her too fast. Anyway, when girl try to get rid of someone in a nice way, they say "I wish you will find someone" , she didnt.Actually, she seemed pretty hurt by this decision.

She is hurt because she knows she camt expect you to wait for her. You two have only been dating for a month amd she likes you, but this time in her.life she needs to focus on her goal. She knows she won't be able to tend to the relationship.

You made it work with your previous relationship because you two had more history together, you said two years right? So you made it work... This relationship is new. She likes you, but doesn't want to hurt you by not being able to give you the time you need, because she would expect the same. She needs to focus on herself.

Because, as you know as a Cap, we like to tend to our relationships once we find someone we actually like. But a Cap under stress like this, is not ready to devote her time the way you want.

Yes greentea, this is exactly what she said to me using another words, she will be hurt because she knows what it takes to have a relationship and she cant do it. That's the thing, I am capable of great sacrifice during this moments, told her I will understand and support her and all that I get is "i dont know.." .I'm thinking of trying to talk with her again after a few days, you see, sometimes people are lost during this moments and nobody can understand her like me, dont wanna let her down especially because I have seen a lot of nice things in her..same for her.

Latest news, I have told her about a female friend rabdom and she started to act weird and she got nervous telling me "we are friends, you dont need to tell me anything"..I have told her "yea, but I dont easly forget what we were and I dint change my mind coz of that"..and then she went off the rails telling me that we had no relationship, it was a stupidity, she just played with words to test how perfect I am, I gave her a lot of stress, she dont care if I am here or not as a friend coz she dont care about anybody..basically, in that night she told me the exact oposite of everything and started to act like everything was a game for her, she just want to study and she want to throw everything. Honestly, I think it was a rage, I tend to do that too when I have a brain colapse 🙂) Capricorn thing. But on the other hand, I have decided to stop talking to her, if she was serious than I dont want to deal with that. What do you think Cap woman? Is it possible to fake 2 months, promises, nice words and hours of fun like this?! I have never seen such woman, in all honesty.

You told her about a female friend? In what way?

Sounds like hurt feelings and ego's on both ends.

We broke up 5 days ago but I was telling her i'm going to help a friend and Im tired, ans also that an old female friend is asking me go with her to buy something and help her with some advices about her byfriend, her reply ? ''You havent told me before that you are talking with girls 😄 but I don't care'' .Then I was back home and send her a text that I'm back and she gave me a bad answer ''so what?we are just friends, you dont need to tell me this''..so it's obvious that she was upset while she told me that she can't handle a relationship and she don't want that.Be started arguing, I was so mad because she was telling me this but she seemed to confused about his decision, told her that she care about me but she is building stupid walls around her..this is how everything started, this is why she started saying all of those bad things. What do you think?

Posted by GNGC
Ok, I m a Capricorn like her, we ve been together for a month, everything was perfect than suddenly over the night she went cold, distant. I have talked with her, her main goal is to pass an important exam, she failed it the 1st time. She said to me that she felt like she is getting close to me, feel smth for me and then she stopped this because she can t hadle studying and having a relationship now. She told me I am the perfect guy for her and a relationship but it s too much for her now and she dont wanna hurt me because she is damn stressed, in every aspect and she want to be alone. What are the chances for this decision to come out wrong? For her to realize she need me. I told her, if she feels that she is regreting this, she can always come around and she said yes. What am I gonna do next? Stop texting? I know if someone ignore me I m starting to realize that I made a sh*t. She need someone to take care of her, being alone is not a fix, her mood is very bad lately, I know by being a Cap.

She doesn't seem like a person who needs another person to take care of her and being alone may actually be a fix if she has things to figure out, like her studies. Did you inform her that you think she needs someone to take care of her, because to me that might even make me dissappear. If I'm in a mood, alone time is exactly what I need.

It seems to me she has told you exactly what you need to know. I would text her rarely, just asking how she's doing and take it from there.

Good luck!🙂

Sounds like you were trying to make her jealous and it pissed her off. possibly turning her off. Caps can make other Caps rage lol, so I think it all just upset her. Who wants to be stressed and hear about other women?

Posted by GNGC
And also, whenever I was trying to explain her why is this wrong she came out saying "I dont know what to say"..so she is confused in my opinion.

she is not confused. you are. she asked you to leave her alone. respect her wish.

nothing is more irritating to be told "you are wrong or confused" when she clearly expressed what she wanted. you think you know what's good for her better than herself? get over yourself

Inana, actually I have explained her about my friend, it's not my fault because I have old friendships with girls but she is way to stubborn to understand.

iCloud, yes I made a mistake but after a night when you tell me "I miss you" you dont come distant, cold with no reason giving unclear reasons and expect me to say "ok, you can go" .I dont have an ON/OFF button, today I'm nice, tomorrow I'm the opposite and is everyone's duty to understand my mood. Also, after promises and everything that happened you dont come and talk like that, she said she dont like to waste time but after that she said everything was a game .. I dont like wasting my time too that's why I dont play games. And no, I will not text her very soon, I'm not a dog. When I have a bad mood I never screw something, I fix it by myself, people around me are not objects to be used only when I need. Also, she said she dont care If Im here or not, same with closed friends, parents. How is it possible to say such words ?!

Any opinions? The bad things she has told me could be a final decision? Because I dont believe such people exist.

Posted by GNGC
Any opinions? The bad things she has told me could be a final decision? Because I dont believe such people exist.

Why did you do that?.. you just.completely ruined everything you worked so hard to prove you were gonna do. She thinks you're just like all the other douchebags now.

Good work Cap!...Bravo!.....

Posted by GNGC
iCloud, yes I made a mistake but after a night when you tell me "I miss you" you dont come distant, cold with no reason giving unclear reasons and expect me to say "ok, you can go" .I dont have an ON/OFF button, today I'm nice, tomorrow I'm the opposite and is everyone's duty to understand my mood. Also, after promises and everything that happened you dont come and talk like that, she said she dont like to waste time but after that she said everything was a game .. I dont like wasting my time too that's why I dont play games. And no, I will not text her very soon, I'm not a dog. When I have a bad mood I never screw something, I fix it by myself, people around me are not objects to be used only when I need. Also, she said she dont care If Im here or not, same with closed friends, parents. How is it possible to say such words ?!

i understand you don't have an ON/OFF button. most don't. i'm sure she doesn't either. her stress tolerance may be lower than yours. i had a low stress tolerance when i was in school. it's related to life experience and maturity level so you cannot force it. it is what it is. it is bad timing. it's neither her fault, nor yours. she just cannot deal with the emotional and physical demands a new relationship requires while focusing on her test.

if you want the best for her, respect her wish. stop causing her more emotional stress. stop asking her why. stop telling her she is wrong/confused. stop trying to change her mind. she'd really appreciate if you can be a supportive friend but if it hurts you and you cannot stop adding stress in her life, then let her go completely, for both of your sanity.

iCloud and Donna, I completly understand everything, trust me. Yes her stress level may be lower than mine, I was in this situation as I said and I have figured out how to handle both, exams and relationships.I was the same age.

But, you miss one thing from what I have said, she said everything was a stupid game, her opinion is that we had no relationship !
Ok, she knew about this exam since last summer when she faild it 1st time, why in the world she started this anyway? She knew I'm for a long term relationship, asked me to have patience with her, I had from the start, we were friends and then slowly became more, we liked each other and now coming and saying everything was a game, all of those things were meant to test me and play with my mind?

After saying this of course I will not text her again, maybe in the next weeks to ask her how's going but nothing more. Ok, you have a stress overload moment but you don't come and say that everything was useless only because you don't want it anymore in that particular moment, am I right?

Again, she seemed like she stopped a game, not some feelings like she said in the first place 🙂

I see that this would end up being one of the more dramatic Cap pairings I always talk about lol.

You want answers and she's not going to give them to you. She said whatever she wanted to say to get you off her back I believe. Just let it go cause if anything, her telling you it was a game should end whatever connection you thought you had.

Yes I understand but you see, between those stupid words she said something like ''I have no problem If you want to check up on me to see how I'm doing, if not, I dont care, I dont hate people, If you want we talk about anything else'' .Why would she said that If those words were supposed to end everything now and forever.

Our chat was a big ''leave me alone/you can talk to me'' game. Now she said that, 5 minutes later she said ''leave me alone'' .For the love of god

I have seen that topic, honestly I am tired of this stupid situation, I will never waste my time on fake people, she has no excuse for this. She is just a player, end of the discussion.
I made a mistake by not listening to her but looks like I'm the only one who have the ego to admit it, I would have expected an apology ''sorry I was talking like that, sorry I have used you'' or something. Nothing.

Posted by GNGC
The thing is I am a Cap but I will never do that, I can find a way for everything without sacrifice someone.She told me great things, did that too, we were talking everyday, sweet words then overnight things went down.Her test is in June 🙂 Honesly, by being a Cap, I will never shut the feelings down, I was in her situation and I had a relationship( 2 years) and I have managed to make them both and also I know we can manage to make this too but she is stubborn, she is complaining about being tired, she is always sleeping, or studying, she is very impulsive with her family too.
Yes, she knew about this test but this didn't stopped her to start smth with me, yes she told me I need to have petience at the start, so this decision came almost overnight that's why I'm asking if I need to detach a little to make her come back, not rushing her by texting. I'm thiking of reversing the process, decision came overnight so regret might come overnight, she was totally different when we were okay.
I know the Cap deal, she is 90% like me but she got some weir behavior I don't understand.Shut down the feeling?Are they gone or still there and remained at that certain level? I wonder if they will count

wow, you are selfish AF

Im a venus in capricorn and mars virgo. I get earth signs and being a workaholic. Putting in long hours for better outcomes. The poor girl failed a test and youre all like stop being a bitch and date me.

you should respect her. In stead of plaing games with her, instead of being all pessimistic, you shoulda turned on your earth side and delivered food to her crib, get her a massage, buy her some aromatherapy.


Be part of the solution, not the problem

Capricorns are supposed not to be a rock for their lover.

you aint being no rock

She refuse to get out of her room, she is so lazy.I am the type of guy who want to spend time with my partner, I'm looking for someone who got TIME, not excuses 🙂 Because if my girl would call me in the midnight that she needs me be sure I will be on my way, but she can't. Me selfish? 2 months I have accepted this behavior and told her that I understand, I have my limits, this is what I deserve for understanding his wish to stay home, be on facebook, sleep instead of spending time with me? The perfect time for her was on the phone/texting.

Call me selfish but I gave 110% while I was getting only phone talk and in the end this crap behavior. Her mind is messed up.

Posted by GNGC
She refuse to get out of her room, she is so lazy.I am the type of guy who want to spend time with my partner, I'm looking for someone who got TIME, not excuses 🙂 Because if my girl would call me in the midnight that she needs me be sure I will be on my way, but she can't. Me selfish? 2 months I have accepted this behavior and told her that I understand, I have my limits, this is what I deserve for understanding his wish to stay home, be on facebook, sleep instead of spending time with me? The perfect time for her was on the phone/texting.

Call me selfish but I gave 110% while I was getting only phone talk and in the end this crap behavior. Her mind is messed up.

Seriously? My mouth is actually agape. Please read what you just wrote again.

I for real hope this is just a translation issue (I'm assuming English is not the OP's native tongue).. otherwise, it kinda sounds like..

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/645768

Posted by Andalusia
I for real hope this is just a translation issue (I'm assuming English is not the OP's native tongue).. otherwise, it kinda sounds like..

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/645768

...or a troll. Cause this is just too much.

I only read the beginning and end of this thread, but I will tell you this: if I'm going through stress, I WANT my partner there for me. In fact, I get needy and want them around even more (even if I'm working on something, I just want them there somewhere, lol). They become my light in the dark, the stress melts away when I'm with them. I'm not sure if that's how it works for all Capricorns, but that's how I've always been. It sounds like she used this stress as an excuse to let you down easy. I have a hard time telling people I don't want to be with them, so I usually end up ghosting them or coming up with a "I'm really busy/stressed" excuse. I know it's terrible, but I hate hurting people's feelings. I'm still learning how to be up front that I've lost my interest in someone. The thing is, you've picked out all of these clues that she still wants you around ("You can still talk to me/check in on me.") but in all honesty, she's just being nice. Maybe she DOES have feelings for you but knows you aren't right for each other, too. So she's just distancing herself. I just know that when someone wants to be with someone, they be with them. Their actions show it. She isn't showing it.

I'd let it go. Move on. It's not easy but it's going to cause you a lot less pain in the long run if you let it go now instead of holding on. If it was meant to be, maybe in the future you'll reconnect.