Caps traits even at 17

Hey everyone. I'm new to the forum (as in finally registered) but I've been reading a lot of posts for a awhile already. Unfortunately, I fell into the Cap Trap. I just have a few questions ( before I give details about my situation with my Cap that began in September...VERY juicy details. But that'll be in a later post)

I know that Cap males may pursue or initiate after they learn that someone they've had their eye on is interested (at least that's what happened to me), but why does it seem that when I spoke about what will become of the relationship with him, he always says, "It's whatever you want." It may seem good to most but it's frustrating because it's so one-sided. I've told him it has to work both ways. It's almost as if he wants to submit to me. He always says (in some situations) "It's whatever you want." But in one case, we got into a little bit of a an argument where I ended it with "I just want to be friends." The next day he's pouring his heart out to me and offering to give me a few months to "relax" because he thought I was acting "weird" or I had other "plans" with him when I told him I wanted to be friends only. He was obviously suspicious but I had no intentions of hurting him. He came on a little too strong at first so that was my way of retreating. He even mentioned a "Black List" of people who betrayed him in some way and he said that I may be put on next if he finds out I'm playing games with him. This was after he told me he liked me...Creepy.

So now that I'm stuck with him, the only way out is to basically hurt him? (not that I plan on it. I'm just as cautious and suspicious as he is. Check my profile...lots of Capricorn) Do they let go easily? Especially if they made a connection with someone quickly and made their intentions clear many times? ( I'm also in the "in between friends and partners" phase)

You need a gameplan - for one though - caps usually don't get along with each other in a relationship - both are very inpendent signs and therefore there may be conflict in being able to reason with one another - another thing about caps is that they're very careful with whom they give their heart to - because this usually means that they have to learn to trust the other person and trust is a very important thing to us - the thing about him sounding aloof about the relationship when he said 'whatever you want' were not ones to really have a prob with adjusting to others - were usually very understanding of others and their needs but only to a point of where we feel were being taken advantage of - then were most likely to take what's left of our pride and decide were better off alone - solitude is a big thing to us - and caps are analytical thinkers as well - we're very calculated people - always ones to look before we leap - I remembered someone I worked with that was an aquarius and he went out with a cap and it seemed like every now and then they'd have relationship probs. The women seem to be a lil more carefree than the males though - more likely to spend despite one known trait of caps being rather frugal with their money - usually were also the workaholic type (I know I am) and also make very devoted and committed companions esp. if were in a relationship we like - don't be surprised if this cap comes off very casual and uncaring - its just their way of protecting their fragile hearts from getting hurt. Some signs take different strides in relationships and its all going to depend on the sign were with. I hope this helps a little - and feel free to ask for any additional advice if need be 🙂 Good luck!

I agree capvirgo. He talks of people he dislikes only when he knows they have a lot of money and power. He is very calculating. Our earlier conversations when we were getting to know eachother, he would ask me questions that involved me to think hard about what I wanted in a relationship, and maybe also to see if I was a carefree, flirtatious person, which I'm not. He acts like he doesn't care most of the time, which really hurt me at first. And talk about aloof!!!! He lives 1 BLOCK AWAY from me. We would literally watch eachother from afar, like complete strangers. By reading a lot of your posts and other people's posts, my worries subsided. Interesting story about your ex-Taurus. Her loss, I guess.

Do you want him back or not!

I think I have some good advise for you either way?

Let me know?

We were never exclusive. But he's hinted many times that we could be. Remember, I met him in September, so I guess it hasn't been that long. He has some issues to deal with. He's still in his "cave" after finding out he didn't get the car that he dreamed of owning for MONTHS ( a BMW, but a money situation ruined his chances of picking it up at the dealer...so no car for him and he's moodier than ever). We talked but I haven't physically seen him since (this was at the end of October). And he has some other issue to take care of that's pretty serious. So I'm good knowing what's going on with him. I'll have to wait until everything is taken care to see if he is going to keep his word to me. I even know when his other problem will be over. It involves a probation officer (long story but just know he's NOT a criminal).

Well the best thing to do with a cap male is show your support he will act like he doesn't need anyone around but secretly they hate being alone. If your there in his time of need he will definetly appritiate you more as a person. You have to have a monster big heart with a cap don't let little things they say bug you. Compliments are very important it makes them feel like they are on top of the world. He will probly come back at you with a smart ass remark but just watch his face glow after you say it to him.
Constant compliment and reasureance because they have VERY low self esteam issues. You need to bring him up to where he belongs.

DO NOT DESERT HIM IN HIS TIME OF NEED. That is the biggest mistake you will ever make. Dont talk to other guys. its like cheating to them. Especially not an ex an ex is an ex whether you make nice or not. LEAVE YOUR EXS IN THE PAST where they belong. No suck thing as friends there is past feelings that might arise again in the future..... Your more likly to cheat with your ex then a stranger. Cause they already no your weak spots.

If he is under alot of pressure and he doesn't call you. Call him every so often give him that reasurence that you are there for him if he wants someone to talk to or just someone to sit and watch tv you are there!!!

Good luck! Caps get hurt very easily, Beware, they say very meen things, But they are not all bad they are the best ppl to grow old with.
Check your charts though cause Im not sure if you guys will go good with eachother.

Exclusive or not your a prospect. And caps are such good ppl that being a prospect is better then anything.

Show them loyalty, honesty, and faithfullness. They will always be there for you. Even if they do act selfish occationally.

Good luck and have fun.

I did both of our charts. The only difference is the Moon and Venus. His moon is in Leo and Venus in Aquarius. Not sure of his rising.

"He always says (in some situations) "It's whatever you want." But in one case, we got into a little bit of a an argument where I ended it with "I just want to be friends.""

OUCH! That was a harsh thing for you to say. If I was him I'd take that to mean that you don't like me as much as I like you.

He puts the ball in your court because he is already sure of wanting to be with you. He would feel vulnerable saying how he feels (since he already told you before, he's not likely to repeat it) so he wants to see if you feel the same. Its mini-test. We test alot and its so natural that we don't realize it until after it occurs.

"He came on a little too strong at first so that was my way of retreating. He even mentioned a "Black List" of people who betrayed him in some way and he said that I may be put on next if he finds out I'm playing games with him. This was after he told me he liked me...Creepy."
LOL, this is not creepy (but of course an air sign would think so). We are intense and feel deeply. Rejection really scares us.

"So now that I'm stuck with him, the only way out is to basically hurt him? " NOOOOOOO
A Cap will easily let you go once you reveal to them directly that you are no longer interested. You have to be gentle but honest and direct in saying this and we will disappear faster than you can say bye-bye! It may hurt us but we have too much pride to hold on to someone that doesn't want us.

To me it sounds like you don't really want to be with him. If you are confused about him, take it slow. If you are not confused and he is not what you want, explain how you feel and leave him alone. We don't like being played with. Always be upfront and honest about your intentions. Prove your trustworthy. Make sure we know without a doubt how you feel.

Seriously, I am interested. It was just a lot of 'what ifs' that I thought of but I'm not going to leave him behind because we both know the other is picky and we don't tell others that we like them often, and I just so happen to genuinely like him. There's no way I'm letting go, unless he says so.

Gemini_82grl, I've never been boy crazy.EVER. If anything, I've always had issues to where I disliked most boys and even fought with them growing up. He knows this and what does school have to do with this? I have everything planned already. No boy is going to come between that. He has his own plans as well and if the relationship works, he'll be a part of it. That's it. I usually don't think about relationships, never had a boyfriend because I never cared or they just didn't do it for me. He just happened to come along and we 'clicked'.

Money is no issue. He gets his own and I get mine. Although he did say he wouldn't want me to buy him anything, so I'm assuming he'll be the one buying, since he's asked what I would like for my birthday coming up.

Aqua sun your a smart girl... : )

Just go for it stop being a chicken.... LOL.

I'm too scared!!!!!!!! 😢 It's really my pride, though. Have to admit it already.

Ok then What gets u motivated, Hyper maybe or even gutsy?

Maybe I can give you some encoragement cause it sounds like your only cheating yourself out of true love or lust! Whichever you choose.

CapAngel, the very next day (after I told him I just wanted to be friends), he tells me how he feels and suggested to give me time (2 or 3 months) to 'think'. Read my other post. It's in there. He obviously didn't want to be 'just friends' although I didn't realize it until MUCH later.

I honestly don't think he would want to be my friend if that were my decision because he threatened never to speak to me again, not even a 'Hi', when I tried to run from him in the beginning(literally. he would stop by my house and wait with his friends).
So it's more like "we will eventually be a couple or nothing", to him that is.

Not that I want to be just friends (I want more than that), but is it that caps don't like the option of friendship when it's someone they're interested in? They have to cut them off right away?

I'll admit, I'm a coward. I don't like taking risks. If I find out someone likes and I start to show interest, I RUN!!!

You're definitely right. I'm only cheating myself. Maybe if he tells me again or shows some sign again that he still wants more. Until then, a friendship is all I'll have to offer, even if I freakin' loved him, I won't budge.

I was thinking about texting him or writing him an e-mail, since I can express myself better through writing. But....

Do that then cause waiting for him to tell you how he feels again is a waste caps say it once and expect you to remember it forever.

Send an email..... Do it...

By the way the reason why im being so persistant is because I like seeing happy endings and it really sounds like you will have one if you can tell him you feel the same way..

Sorry.

You're so right!!! We've gotten along so well it's almost too good. He's given me more than he has received. I've given MUCH less. He have a lot of effort and I did give here and there. The least I can do is to return the favor by writing the e-mail.

*he gave a lot of effort

WOW. I feel bad now. Poor guy. It's like I have HIM on a string.

Actually my cap man is like that he more affectionate when I ignore him. When I give him all my attention he tells me Im annoying him.LOL

The same with me. The timing is ALWAYS off.

How long after you met did you start dating?

"Not that I want to be just friends (I want more than that), but is it that caps don't like the option of friendship when it's someone they're interested in? They have to cut them off right away?"

Wow I do this. I don't know if its a Cap thing but I guess it is lol. If I am attracted to a man and like him for more than a friend, there's NO way I can be JUST his friend. I would always want more and inside I would suffer so I cut them off right away. I'm not friends with exes neither.

Write him and tell him how you feel. Because right now he is waiting for you to come forward and tell him how you feel and what you want. The ball is in your court. He is interested and we don't like to repeat ourselves so go for it. When you do tell him how you feel, also let him know if you're ready or not for a relationship.

Arrgghh!!! This is harder than I thought. My plan was to wait until he contacts me, since I'm the one usually does the calling. He's never ignored my calls and if he doesn't pick-up, he calls right back 5-15 later. Or keeps calling all day until I pick-up. Maybe he does really want something, if he puts a lot of effort in trying to reach me.

We met eachother one day and since then we were inseperable we stated dating 1 month into it!

1 months is pretty fast but then again you two were sure of eachother I guess.

With my guy, the fact that he's slept with so many girls is a problem with me. He told me the reason he likes me (besides my personality)is because I'm a good girl and no guy has ever had me. But he did tell me he slept with all those girls because he was trying to find the right one and it turned out they were missing something he wanted even though most girls were 'good'.

So I guess it really is about quality than quantity with caps.

We were ment for each other. I hope. I have slept with more men then my cap has with women but that is in there chart that they go from partner to partner.

My ex was like that I sware he has slept with all of Ontario. I was very uptight about it too. So its not uncommon to feel that way. Dont let it get to you though cause it will always be in the back of your head and it will drive you crazy. My ex cheated twice. Stupid me. Maybe thats why Im so insecure. Oh well my problem.

Anyhow he is a cap, are you a cap to or just a cap moon?

Sun Aquarius
Moon Capricorn
Mercury Capricorn
Venus Capricorn
Mars Sagittarius
Jupiter Cancer
Saturn Capricorn
Uranus Capricorn
Neptune Capricorn
Pluto Scorpio
Lilith Scorpio
Asc Node Aquarius
Rising in Gemini

His is:

Sun Capricorn
Moon Leo
Mercury Capricorn
Venus Aquarius
Mars Sagittarius
Jupiter Cancer
Saturn Capricorn
Uranus Capricorn
Neptune Capricorn
Pluto Scorpio
Lilith Scorpio
Asc Node Aquarius

Don't know his rising though.

I took an astrology test and it said I should be a Capricorn. WTF!!!

Actually, I could understand it.
My ex-best friend of 7 years is a Capricorn (Jan.14)
One of my closest friends is a Capricorn (Dec.26)
The cousin who I was ever the closest with is a Capricorn (Jan.10)
My favorite male cousin is a Capricorn (Jan.9)
My Cap is Jan.13.

I also attract a lot of earth signs. I have good Taurus friends and my brother is a Taurus and the closest person to me.

I also attract and like a lot of Geminis.

Hate Aries, attract a lot of Sagittarius people but don't like them ( I think there are 4 or 5 that I hate) Hate Leos but I get along with them.

Thats funny cause I am gemini in sagitarus.

Sounds like your pretty good for each other but keep in mind they say caps dont go with caps because they are tooo much alike.

"Maybe he does really want something, if he puts a lot of effort in trying to reach me."

YES.

We are not phone people and are bad at initiating phone communication. I haven't called my friends in months (I use email now & then). So we prefer if you do the calling. As long as he calls back, you're fine...since he calls back so soon, even better, you have NOTHING to worry about (I don't call back right away unless I really like the person)!

Your Sun opposes his Moon - so you might butt heads a bit but the rest of your planets match his nicely.

Now I see why you are scared to initiate, you have loads of Cap in your chart. Still, he did already put the ball in your court so for now, you will have to initiate until you give him the green light.

Did you email him like you said you were going to?

If so good for you, your on your way to a happier place.

If not, then what are you waiting for?

No... I will eventually. Seriously.