First 1-2 months of dating a Cap is bizarre- ha!

This topic was created in the Capricorn forum by PuraLeo on Wednesday, June 19, 2013 and has 15 replies.

Understanding the Early Stages of Dating a Capricorn

The first months of dating a Capricorn can feel unpredictable as they may chase, show care, or act differently to avoid rejection. This behavior is part of their cautious approach to relationships, requiring patience and understanding to build trust and connection.

Profile picture of PuraLeo
@PuraLeo
13 Years

Seriously..

He chases

He starts caring

He tells me he doesn't chase so I will chase him and he won't worry about rejection

Sound familiar? Anyone out there think the early stages with a Cap are a little funky?

Profile picture of aquapiscescusp
@aquapiscescusp
14 Years10,000+ Posts

I would recommend not chasing him, even if he "expects" you to do it. It's the beginning of a long session of manipulation on his part. If he was chasing you early on, then he could chase now too.

Don't be fooled.

Profile picture of truecap
@truecap
14 Years10,000+ Posts

Caps will only move forward if we sense that you feel the same. We have a fear of rejection. If you chase him, just a little, it will reassure him that you are as into him as he is you. We need lots of reassurances in the early stages.

Don't go all out, but invite him out for drinks with you and your friends. Cook him dinner. Send him a cute, funny text that will make him laugh. Just do something every now and then. Its not really chasing, but it does let him know you like him.

Profile picture of PuraLeo
@PuraLeo
13 Years

To me, it's a game. A Capricorn man wants to feel wanted but I highly doubt he responds well to being chased. What women has ever chased a man and hasn't seen things get unbalanced as a result?

If you want me then chase me. I'm not going to instigate every date and all the communication-which is nearly what he's asking for just so you get a clear picture here- just so he can avoid a fear of rejection.

We all fear rejection, but I've learned the hard way that (most) men don't feel something's of value unless they had to work for it. That's why the mixed message is just another game to me.. I'd love to be wrong here.

He sends plenty of mixed messages, that I won't bore you with. I promise, this has become a game of egos. Well see what happens I guess?

Profile picture of PuraLeo
@PuraLeo
13 Years

So.. how do I know if he's quietly waiting for some reassurance or if he's quiet because he's taking his Cap alone time?

Looks the same on the outside so how am I suppose to know which one it is...?
]
Feels remarkably like a game. Crap.

Profile picture of truecap
@truecap
14 Years10,000+ Posts

If you're so against games, don't play them. Leave him alone and let him come to you.
I promise you, he's wondering if you really like him or not. What I suggested is NOT chasing. It is showing interest. So if you think showing interest is chasing, then don't do it. If you think initiating occasionally is chasing then don't. Men like to feel encouraged. Especially caps. We are all shy and timid and insecure when it comes to romantic relationships. So don't chase him. If your MO is to let them chase you and satisfy YOUR Leo ego, then don't chase. Don't initiate, don't call, don't invite. He will think you are high maintenance and not interested. You will never hear from him again.

You are correct in what you said, however, you can't sit there and let the man make ALL the contact. They want to know you are interested in them, too.

My advice, contact him, invite him on a group outing or tell him you have an extra ticket to something and ask if he wants to go. If you don't want to do that, then just send him a cute funny text that will make him laugh. Then see if he stays quiet. You'll have your answer.

Profile picture of truecap
@truecap
14 Years10,000+ Posts

IF a man calls/texts/invites 4-5 times, then it's the woman's turn. He does it 4-5 times then she does.

That is not chasing. It is reassuring and rewarding to a man.

Profile picture of CapriLady
@CapriLady
13 Years500+ Posts

It's the initial chase that let's you know it's ok to follow pursuit a little later on, when they get a little funky, and hang out with the crew drinking brass monkey...refreshing thread overall. Yeah, team.

Profile picture of PuraLeo
@PuraLeo
13 Years

Thanks, All for your insights!

I do plan and initiate contact with him because I have no issue showing I care about him and enjoy time with him

I just cannot tell the difference between him needing his alone time and him waiting for me to instigate

How can you tell the difference?