Help with a Capricorn male please

Posted by Greentea
"he came back with the whole I love you and I've thought about us working. Kids marriage the whole thing."

Then



"I proceed to ask is a friendship all he wants his response was why do you just want to hear that."



Really?.... go back and read what you just wrote.

And that's all you got with what he said to you, that all he wants is just a friendship?

Posted by Nataliaaa
It seems to me that you are not getting as you said before, the security you actually need. Even if the told you that he wants a family with you, I don't think his behavior is actually showing you that. He maybe just my point of view the player type.

And believe me when I say that I know what going with the flow means... I've dated lots of guys who are very cool people and very easy to hang with but I think they are more interested in the sagittarius experience before committing to someone. And that's cool, but if that's not your style . You should walk away.

Love should not make you doubt! don't waste your time.

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Greentea
"he came back with the whole I love you and I've thought about us working. Kids marriage the whole thing."

Then



"I proceed to ask is a friendship all he wants his response was why do you just want to hear that."



Really?.... go back and read what you just wrote.

And that's all you got with what he said to you, that all he wants is just a friendship?

I should have explained better. He came back saying things like that we even discussed it but that's as far as it went. meaning he then started to back off stop coming around as much. I joked that he caught feelings and ran and he said maybe. So I backed up because I didn't want to push. I still acted as normal I just tried to give him time to adjust to his new emotions. He then told me he wasn't use to a lady like me and his past still makes him scared. He then also proceeded to come around even less which confused me so I then asked what he wanted from me I prefer a relationship if friendship was all he wanted

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Posted by Greentea

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Greentea
"he came back with the whole I love you and I've thought about us working. Kids marriage the whole thing."

Then



"I proceed to ask is a friendship all he wants his response was why do you just want to hear that."



Really?.... go back and read what you just wrote.

And that's all you got with what he said to you, that all he wants is just a friendship?

I should have explained better. He came back saying things like that we even discussed it but that's as far as it went. meaning he then started to back off stop coming around as much. I joked that he caught feelings and ran and he said maybe. So I backed up because I didn't want to push. I still acted as normal I just tried to give him time to adjust to his new emotions. He then told me he wasn't use to a lady like me and his past still makes him scared. He then also proceeded to come around even less which confused me so I then asked what he wanted from me I prefer a relationship if friendship was all he wanted

If he came back then he realized a relationship was what he wanted. I would've progressed things instead of bringing up friendships. You set the expectation that you wanted a relationship and he understood that and came back anyway, that's what you should've brought up to him.

He obviously couldn't stay away, and he was just scared of how much he felt for you, but I think he's ready, now you just have to watch his actions. In my eyes, you're in a relationship, you just have to make it official for him. F him, this is what you want, amd if he wants you then that's what he has to commit to.

Anyway I'm done giving advice today, it's tiring.

Have a good one 🙂

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Posted by Nataliaaa
That's exactly what i was thinking his behavior isn't adding up but I didn't know if it was the whole needing to adjust/accept the new feelings he felt for me. When you say the sag experience are you meaning fwb until he decides to take it further?

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Greentea

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Greentea
"he came back with the whole I love you and I've thought about us working. Kids marriage the whole thing."

Then



"I proceed to ask is a friendship all he wants his response was why do you just want to hear that."



Really?.... go back and read what you just wrote.

And that's all you got with what he said to you, that all he wants is just a friendship?

I should have explained better. He came back saying things like that we even discussed it but that's as far as it went. meaning he then started to back off stop coming around as much. I joked that he caught feelings and ran and he said maybe. So I backed up because I didn't want to push. I still acted as normal I just tried to give him time to adjust to his new emotions. He then told me he wasn't use to a lady like me and his past still makes him scared. He then also proceeded to come around even less which confused me so I then asked what he wanted from me I prefer a relationship if friendship was all he wanted

If he came back then he realized a relationship was what he wanted. I would've progressed things instead of bringing up friendships. You set the expectation that you wanted a relationship and he understood that and came back anyway, that's what you should've brought up to him.

He obviously couldn't stay away, and he was just scared of how much he felt for you, but I think he's ready, now you just have to watch his actions. In my eyes, you're in a relationship, you just have to make it official for him. F him, this is what you want, amd if he wants you then that's what he has to commit to.

Anyway I'm done giving advice today, it's tiring.

Have a good one 🙂

Lol thanks! A cap with aqua Venus and he's no joke!!! I will watch his actions and go from there. I've already told him I don't need the inconsistency in my life if he walks away again he's out of it for good and he said ok same rules apply for you

From my understanding he didn't walk away. You pushed him out by wanting some verbal confirmation rather than accepting his actions

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Posted by Foreverloveme
Ok

1. Stop taking advice from non caps please lol ?

2. He's given you 8 months & is still in your life meaning

A) he is there because he wants to be

B) is a cap sun aqua venus to bolt after 6 months...you can find this in another recent thread on the cap board if you don't believe me.

3. A cap can love you to death & not verbalize it. We are very action oriented & nonverbal

4. He said he loved you when he came back.

A) he would not come back otherwise meaning his words are true. He loves you

B) you asked about friendship, which caused he to ease up again.

Go with the flow = I'm here with you = be happy 🙂

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Greentea

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Greentea
"he came back with the whole I love you and I've thought about us working. Kids marriage the whole thing."

Then



"I proceed to ask is a friendship all he wants his response was why do you just want to hear that."



Really?.... go back and read what you just wrote.

And that's all you got with what he said to you, that all he wants is just a friendship?

Lol thanks! A cap with aqua Venus and he's no joke!!! I will watch his actions and go from there. I've already told him I don't need the inconsistency in my life if he walks away again he's out of it for good and he said ok same rules apply for you

From my understanding he didn't walk away. You pushed him out by wanting some verbal confirmation rather than accepting his actions

So help me out are you saying because he's acting a certain way I am to assume we were in a relationship?

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Yes, with caps it's actions, we don't like talking about feelings at all,

Well thanks that makes me feel a lot better except for the fact that I told him earlier if he wanted to go with the flow we could

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Foreverloveme
Ok

1. Stop taking advice from non caps please lol ?

2. He's given you 8 months & is still in your life meaning

A) he is there because he wants to be

B) is a cap sun aqua venus to bolt after 6 months...you can find this in another recent thread on the cap board if you don't believe me.

3. A cap can love you to death & not verbalize it. We are very action oriented & nonverbal

4. He said he loved you when he came back.

A) he would not come back otherwise meaning his words are true. He loves you

B) you asked about friendship, which caused he to ease up again.

Go with the flow = I'm here with you = be happy 🙂

Lmbo

1. Ok ??

2. I don't understand b. Are you saying as a cap/Aqua he would have left around 6 months?

3.i get that as a Virgo I don't really say I love you unless someone says it first

4. Will he ever verbalize things are official? He's once told me when we first met he's the type to take you on a date and request to make things official so that's why I was sure he would say it to me instead of expecting me to know.

2. Yes

4. Sure. When he asks for your hand in marriage lol

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Posted by Foreverloveme
In all seriousness there was a scorp lady who HAD to hear the words from her Cap guy...wish I could remember which thread. It was maybe a month back or so. Just browse the Cap board when you have free time.

Greentea recently posted a Cap in love youtube video that can provide you with insight as well.

We're out after 1-3 months so 8 months alone speaks volumes & he's saying I can overlook our differences because I still want to be with you.

The verbal/nonverbal could be one of those differences...I think you might want to decide if you can accept him as he is or not

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Foreverloveme
In all seriousness there was a scorp lady who HAD to hear the words from her Cap guy...wish I could remember which thread. It was maybe a month back or so. Just browse the Cap board when you have free time.

Greentea recently posted a Cap in love youtube video that can provide you with insight as well.

We're out after 1-3 months so 8 months alone speaks volumes & he's saying I can overlook our differences because I still want to be with you.

The verbal/nonverbal could be one of those differences...I think you might want to decide if you can accept him as he is or not

I can accept it nonverbal however when he gets mad at me for something ( I never know he's mad he doesn't express it) he will say something about he's single. I eventually told him if he feels the need to throw up the fact that he's single every other day makes me want to walk away

Oh ok. There was a quote I saw that said you won't know a cap is hurt unless they say I'm hurt.

Him saying he's single every other day is a red flag...idk maybe other caps can chime in to help further

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Posted by champranger

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Foreverloveme
Ok

1. Stop taking advice from non caps please lol ?

2. He's given you 8 months & is still in your life meaning

A) he is there because he wants to be

B) is a cap sun aqua venus to bolt after 6 months...you can find this in another recent thread on the cap board if you don't believe me.

3. A cap can love you to death & not verbalize it. We are very action oriented & nonverbal

4. He said he loved you when he came back.

A) he would not come back otherwise meaning his words are true. He loves you

B) you asked about friendship, which caused he to ease up again.

Go with the flow = I'm here with you = be happy 🙂

Lmbo

1. Ok ??

2. I don't understand b. Are you saying as a cap/Aqua he would have left around 6 months?

3.i get that as a Virgo I don't really say I love you unless someone says it first

4. Will he ever verbalize things are official? He's once told me when we first met he's the type to take you on a date and request to make things official so that's why I was sure he would say it to me instead of expecting me to know.

2. Yes

4. Sure. When he asks for your hand in marriage lol

Lmbo I always wondered how he could talk about marriage and buying a house with such a def time frame in mind but never say anything about making it official and then when I made it clear that I wanted a relationship and he would throw up that he was single I would be confused

Maybe he's feeling pressured. He probably really likes you and wants to have a future with you, but maybe isn't quite sure how to approach this? If he's never felt this way about someone and he really likes you, he'd probably really wants to make sure things go smoothly. Then you telling him that you want relationship and not friendship might have added more pressure.

IMO

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Posted by champranger

Posted by Missvirgobaby
He could have felt pressure that's one thing I never thought about. He always says he values and cherishes our friendship... I think that's the aqua Venus talking. I do know once he said his mom called me her future daughter in law and I think that scared him shitless lol.

lol that might be it ... in that he thinks highly of you (as he always says he values and cherishes your friendship) and likes you, and so does his mom ... so he probably feel certain added expectations from his family with regards to you... The pressure might also the reason for his "go with flow" statement 🤔

IMO

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Posted by champranger

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by champranger

Posted by Missvirgobaby
He could have felt pressure that's one thing I never thought about. He always says he values and cherishes our friendship... I think that's the aqua Venus talking. I do know once he said his mom called me her future daughter in law and I think that scared him shitless lol.

lol that might be it ... in that he thinks highly of you (as he always says he values and cherishes your friendship) and likes you, and so does his mom ... so he probably feel certain added expectations from his family with regards to you... The pressure might also the reason for his "go with flow" statement 🤔

IMO

Never considered family may be adding pressure. He has told me several times his mom asked when he would get married and fine a nice woman and settle down with or a nice woman to help him out. I always over look the comments due to him saying they irritate him. However go with the flow irks me. I guess the Virgo in me likes to schedule and plan I have a fear of the unknown

With a Cap Sun, it's very unlikely that he wouldn't have a plan and/or leave things to chance. I think with a Cap, it's more like ... if you're gonna do it, you may as well do it right the first time. He probably have rather high expectations of himself in all this. He wants things to go smoothly and probably expects nothing else of himself.

I think it's more ... let him do it at his pace. Once he's more sure of the direction he's heading, you should be getting certainties...because if he really likes you, he'll want to contact you and see you as often as he can.

IMO

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Posted by scarletvixen
I was one of those with a Cap Sun/Aqua venus who went wiggly on me after 6 months, twice. The first time ended in an epic fight and the second one, well, we're navigating through it and we're sailing into the 8th month and we're in an even better place than we've ever been.

I am/was struggling with the will us/won't us situation but I think what has helped is that since my personal life is genuinely busy, and I don't necessarily tell him everything all the time, but only volunteer extra information when he's more open, it somehow helped keep him on his toes.

Also, as Virgos, I think we tend to overanalyze too much, which is completely normal and expected because we can't help it! But I've learnt that most of the time, my worries and negative thoughts are just that and with him, I've learnt to shush them up and to pay attention to his actions. Is he always there when you need him? Does he try his best to keep you happy when you've communicated to him about what you want? Is he constant and reliable?

I also tend to agree on not pressuring him about the relationship thing. Like, it's one thing that you're together in his mind. It's another thing when you or someone else verbalizes it in front him, I think. He can handle the first one but the second one will make him press the eject button very fast.

I may be wrong about my assessment but I just thought I'd share my experience 🙂

Posted by Foreverloveme
In all seriousness there was a scorp lady who HAD to hear the words from her Cap guy...wish I could remember which thread. It was maybe a month back or so. Just browse the Cap board when you have free time.

Greentea recently posted a Cap in love youtube video that can provide you with insight as well.

We're out after 1-3 months so 8 months alone speaks volumes & he's saying I can overlook our differences because I still want to be with you.

The verbal/nonverbal could be one of those differences...I think you might want to decide if you can accept him as he is or not

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Jalent99
? Yikes! I was told go with the flow by a cap sun, venus and aquarius moon last month and I m really not liking that statement! Being a cap sun aquarius venus, internally I have a time frame.....if he prefers to keep things ambiguous, I rather walkaway....

Dunno if this applies to men, but if I like a person more than a friend but am not into the relationship because of various reasons, if he waits and continues putting in effort, I usually fall for him in 3-4mths. This is provided there is a strong mutual attraction. Only happ once to me before with another cap sun and venus

How long have you been dating him?

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Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Jalent99

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Jalent99
? Yikes! I was told go with the flow by a cap sun, venus and aquarius moon last month and I m really not liking that statement! Being a cap sun aquarius venus, internally I have a time frame.....if he prefers to keep things ambiguous, I rather walkaway....

Dunno if this applies to men, but if I like a person more than a friend but am not into the relationship because of various reasons, if he waits and continues putting in effort, I usually fall for him in 3-4mths. This is provided there is a strong mutual attraction. Only happ once to me before with another cap sun and venus

How long have you been dating him?

Approx 5/6wks when I asked if he is looking for anything serious. Has been slightly more than 2 mths now, last week I asked if he is seeing anyone else, he says initially yes but recently he has been busy with work and spends most of his free time with me. Which is approx 2 dates of 1-2hrs per wk....

He is away for a 2wks hols now.....

5/6 weeks, I'd still be deciding

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Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Jalent99
@Foreverloveme

Thats good to know!! I m very attracted to him thus didnt walk away after the "Go with the flow" statement....i will usually not stick ard if someone else says tht to me

When he told me he dated others initially after going out with me though not recently, I was actually slightly upset.....that he is still looking after knowing me....but I guess him spending all his free time with me in recent wks made me feel a little better, anyway I didnt act out abt this infront of him.....

Maybe I think too much, I m worried he is just looking for a fwb thus continues to date me

You sound like you're playing your cards right. I understand leaving after someone else would've said that because I'm similar with certain things.

Sounds like he's being upfront & honest with you. & the recent time he's spending with you is a good indication. In my mind that says yes, I was initially seeing others, after getting to know you, I'm no longer doing so...

Should get a little clearer in the next few weeks. Once he's done traveling and you reach the 3 month mark

Hang in there 🙂

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Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Foreverloveme
Ok

1. Stop taking advice from non caps please lol ?

2. He's given you 8 months & is still in your life meaning

A) he is there because he wants to be

B) is a cap sun aqua venus to bolt after 6 months...you can find this in another recent thread on the cap board if you don't believe me.

3. A cap can love you to death & not verbalize it. We are very action oriented & nonverbal

4. He said he loved you when he came back.

A) he would not come back otherwise meaning his words are true. He loves you

B) you asked about friendship, which caused he to ease up again.

Go with the flow = I'm here with you = be happy 🙂

Lmbo

1. Ok ??

2. I don't understand b. Are you saying as a cap/Aqua he would have left around 6 months?

3.i get that as a Virgo I don't really say I love you unless someone says it first

4. Will he ever verbalize things are official? He's once told me when we first met he's the type to take you on a date and request to make things official so that's why I was sure he would say it to me instead of expecting me to know.

2. Yes

4. Sure. When he asks for your hand in marriage lol

6mths is my cut off too. By then, if I'm still on the fence about my feelings, it ain't gonna happen. If I'm not all in, I'm out.

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Posted by Jalent99
? Yikes! I was told go with the flow by a cap sun, venus and aquarius moon last month and I m really not liking that statement! Being a cap sun aquarius venus, internally I have a time frame.....if he prefers to keep things ambiguous, I rather walkaway....

Dunno if this applies to men, but if I like a person more than a friend but am not into the relationship because of various reasons, if he waits and continues putting in effort, I usually fall for him in 3-4mths. This is provided there is a strong mutual attraction. Only happ once to me before with another cap sun and venus

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by pinkbird03
I think some caps move extremely slow. My friend calls it "turtle speed" ?

If I don't feel instant attraction, I don't bother. If that instant attraction doesn't grow into what is potentially love in 1-3mths, I'm gonna start wondering why. I've already mentioned what happens by month six.

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Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Jalent99

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Jalent99

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Jalent99
? Yikes! I was told go with the flow by a cap sun, venus and aquarius moon last month and I m really not liking that statement! Being a cap sun aquarius venus, internally I have a time frame.....if he prefers to keep things ambiguous, I rather walkaway....

Dunno if this applies to men, but if I like a person more than a friend but am not into the relationship because of various reasons, if he waits and continues putting in effort, I usually fall for him in 3-4mths. This is provided there is a strong mutual attraction. Only happ once to me before with another cap sun and venus

How long have you been dating him?

Approx 5/6wks when I asked if he is looking for anything serious. Has been slightly more than 2 mths now, last week I asked if he is seeing anyone else, he says initially yes but recently he has been busy with work and spends most of his free time with me. Which is approx 2 dates of 1-2hrs per wk....

He is away for a 2wks hols now.....

5/6 weeks, I'd still be deciding

Like for me I would know that at this stage of my life, I am looking for something serious. Dunno if he is the one but at least what I want is a serious r/s.....if it doesnt work out I will move on

I wasnt expecting him to say he wants to be serious about me in 6wks, but I wanfed to know if he has the intentions for a serious r/s at this point in his life.....

For him (cap sun and venus, aqua moon) does it work the other way around? He will only look for someth serious only when the right person comes along, otherwise he will just date for the sake of dating.....maybe he is just bored or wants temp companionship

The cap venus is commitment driven so I wouldn't worry too much. I think he just didn't want to say yes this is what it is & we're committed vs. How you just broke it down in this post.

For example I know I want a serious relationship as well, however if someone asked me what is this? I might reply well we're getting to know each other...

Hope you understand what I mean

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Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by pinkbird03
I think some caps move extremely slow. My friend calls it "turtle speed" ?

If I don't feel instant attraction, I don't bother. If that instant attraction doesn't grow into what is potentially love in 1-3mths, I'm gonna start wondering why. I've already mentioned what happens by month six.

click to expand

Posted by SunMoonStars

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by pinkbird03
I think some caps move extremely slow. My friend calls it "turtle speed" ?

If I don't feel instant attraction, I don't bother. If that instant attraction doesn't grow into what is potentially love in 1-3mths, I'm gonna start wondering why. I've already mentioned what happens by month six.

After hearing the stories from my Cap about his exes, I tend to agree. If a Cap doesn't feel that instantaneous attraction, I don't think they can really grow into it... The other person usually has a tough time trying to get the Cap, and things don't seem to end well.

click to expand

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Jalent99
? Yikes! I was told go with the flow by a cap sun, venus and aquarius moon last month and I m really not liking that statement! Being a cap sun aquarius venus, internally I have a time frame.....if he prefers to keep things ambiguous, I rather walkaway....

Dunno if this applies to men, but if I like a person more than a friend but am not into the relationship because of various reasons, if he waits and continues putting in effort, I usually fall for him in 3-4mths. This is provided there is a strong mutual attraction. Only happ once to me before with another cap sun and venus

Three to 4 months is right around when he introduced me to his parents. I'm like you I didn't like that statement because I too am not something to be played with which he knows. Hence where the internal struggle comes from and why I'm here seeking advice. He's just now starting to tell me he loves me without looking like he's scared I won't say it Bk but I don't hear it too often

click to expand

Posted by Jalent99

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Jalent99
? Yikes! I was told go with the flow by a cap sun, venus and aquarius moon last month and I m really not liking that statement! Being a cap sun aquarius venus, internally I have a time frame.....if he prefers to keep things ambiguous, I rather walkaway....

Dunno if this applies to men, but if I like a person more than a friend but am not into the relationship because of various reasons, if he waits and continues putting in effort, I usually fall for him in 3-4mths. This is provided there is a strong mutual attraction. Only happ once to me before with another cap sun and venus

Three to 4 months is right around when he introduced me to his parents. I'm like you I didn't like that statement because I too am not something to be played with which he knows. Hence where the internal struggle comes from and why I'm here seeking advice. He's just now starting to tell me he loves me without looking like he's scared I won't say it Bk but I don't hear it too often

I m not counting on meeting his parents, we r bth asians and meeting the family is a serious commitment.....

He is just out of typical Cap venus I know, my first kept asking me to take him seriously and the second wanted me to commit within a mth......

His aquarius moon gives me doubts abt him being serious, I hv dated another before but even then that ex knew what he wants.

The current I m dating just seems different, he works hard and plays hard....he is a Cap sun and venus who loves adventures, within the 2+mths I hv known him, he is on his 2nd trip!

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Posted by Foreverloveme
@Missvirgobaby

We're more practical. We don't like being vulnerable and have a hard time verbally expressing feelings...it's not necessarily intentional as far as keeping cards close to our chest, I put mine on the table when I'm ready. Plus we like to know it's reciprocated.

Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Foreverloveme
@Missvirgobaby

We're more practical. We don't like being vulnerable and have a hard time verbally expressing feelings...it's not necessarily intentional as far as keeping cards close to our chest, I put mine on the table when I'm ready. Plus we like to know it's reciprocated.

He actually bought me a Mother's Day card that was very beautiful and on the inside it said something about being in love. I asked him if he read the card or just grabbed it he said read it while looking straight ahead not making eye contact. I wanted to ask if that's really how he felt but didn't push

Lol we put thought into everything

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Posted by Foreverloveme

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by Jalent99
? Yikes! I was told go with the flow by a cap sun, venus and aquarius moon last month and I m really not liking that statement! Being a cap sun aquarius venus, internally I have a time frame.....if he prefers to keep things ambiguous, I rather walkaway....

Dunno if this applies to men, but if I like a person more than a friend but am not into the relationship because of various reasons, if he waits and continues putting in effort, I usually fall for him in 3-4mths. This is provided there is a strong mutual attraction. Only happ once to me before with another cap sun and venus

Three to 4 months is right around when he introduced me to his parents. I'm like you I didn't like that statement because I too am not something to be played with which he knows. Hence where the internal struggle comes from and why I'm here seeking advice. He's just now starting to tell me he loves me without looking like he's scared I won't say it Bk but I don't hear it too often

He could be questioning your feelings. Why won't you say it back?

click to expand

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by SunMoonStars

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by pinkbird03
I think some caps move extremely slow. My friend calls it "turtle speed" ?

If I don't feel instant attraction, I don't bother. If that instant attraction doesn't grow into what is potentially love in 1-3mths, I'm gonna start wondering why. I've already mentioned what happens by month six.

After hearing the stories from my Cap about his exes, I tend to agree. If a Cap doesn't feel that instantaneous attraction, I don't think they can really grow into it... The other person usually has a tough time trying to get the Cap, and things don't seem to end well.

I'm more Scorp than I am Cap. Then I have the Aqua Venus. I've been told I love like an Aqua and that's true to an extent. But. If I don't fall madly, deeply in love with you and want to wear you like another piece of skin, you're not worth my time. People can say they're picky. People can say they don't settle. They can go fuck themselves. If I don't *need* you in my life, despite the fact I'm a grown ass woman and make my own living and take very good care of me and mine... I don't care to have them, because they aren't worth compromising my freedom. When I meet that person that it's like two hearts beating as one, then we'll talk.

click to expand

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by pinkbird03
I think some caps move extremely slow. My friend calls it "turtle speed" ?

If I don't feel instant attraction, I don't bother. If that instant attraction doesn't grow into what is potentially love in 1-3mths, I'm gonna start wondering why. I've already mentioned what happens by month six.

From what I'm seeing one to three months is a lot of caps time frame. Three to 4 is when I was introduced to the parents. He attempted to leave at 6 due to a topic neither will cave on. But came back with a I love you and plans on how to Make it work.

I've been dating my guy for a year and still haven't met his parents and, under the circumstances, it doesn't seem weird. Everyone has their own time frame. As long as I'm showing my respect and my effort and they're doing the same, traditional benchmarks are of no mind to me. Trust your gut and you'll be fine.

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Posted by Missvirgobaby
I'm in need of ANY insight. I've been seeing this cap guy for about 8 months. He went from when we first started talking saying he couldn't wait to make it official to now saying I'm the perfect woman for him but he cant get past a few of our disagreements. Things still aren't official to this day so I walked away because I wasn't getting the security I needed. That lasted about a week before he came back with the whole I love you and I've thought about us working. Kids marriage the whole thing. I proceed to ask is a friendship all he wants his response was why do you just want to hear that. Lets just go with the flow. My question is does it sound like a lost cause? And what in the world does go with the flow mean I've never been told that before.

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by pinkbird03
I think some caps move extremely slow. My friend calls it "turtle speed" ?

If I don't feel instant attraction, I don't bother. If that instant attraction doesn't grow into what is potentially love in 1-3mths, I'm gonna start wondering why. I've already mentioned what happens by month six.

From what I'm seeing one to three months is a lot of caps time frame. Three to 4 is when I was introduced to the parents. He attempted to leave at 6 due to a topic neither will cave on. But came back with a I love you and plans on how to Make it work.

I've been dating my guy for a year and still haven't met his parents and, under the circumstances, it doesn't seem weird. Everyone has their own time frame. As long as I'm showing my respect and my effort and they're doing the same, traditional benchmarks are of no mind to me. Trust your gut and you'll be fine.

I didn't ask to meet him that was something he did on his own. I definitely let him do things on his own time. The only thing I ever really requested was the relationship. Which honestly is still working on his time

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Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by SunMoonStars

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by pinkbird03
I think some caps move extremely slow. My friend calls it "turtle speed" ?

If I don't feel instant attraction, I don't bother. If that instant attraction doesn't grow into what is potentially love in 1-3mths, I'm gonna start wondering why. I've already mentioned what happens by month six.

After hearing the stories from my Cap about his exes, I tend to agree. If a Cap doesn't feel that instantaneous attraction, I don't think they can really grow into it... The other person usually has a tough time trying to get the Cap, and things don't seem to end well.

I'm more Scorp than I am Cap. Then I have the Aqua Venus. I've been told I love like an Aqua and that's true to an extent. But. If I don't fall madly, deeply in love with you and want to wear you like another piece of skin, you're not worth my time. People can say they're picky. People can say they don't settle. They can go fuck themselves. If I don't *need* you in my life, despite the fact I'm a grown ass woman and make my own living and take very good care of me and mine... I don't care to have them, because they aren't worth compromising my freedom. When I meet that person that it's like two hearts beating as one, then we'll talk.

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Posted by pinkbird03

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by pinkbird03

Since he's avoiding the relationship title, do you think he's talking to other women?

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Ask him! Then trust his answer!......thats what I did, I think theres no point in 2nd guessing. Take his word for it and he will open up to you, be suspicious and you will be in a place where you wont be happy......

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by Missvirgobaby

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by pinkbird03
I think some caps move extremely slow. My friend calls it "turtle speed" ?

If I don't feel instant attraction, I don't bother. If that instant attraction doesn't grow into what is potentially love in 1-3mths, I'm gonna start wondering why. I've already mentioned what happens by month six.

From what I'm seeing one to three months is a lot of caps time frame. Three to 4 is when I was introduced to the parents. He attempted to leave at 6 due to a topic neither will cave on. But came back with a I love you and plans on how to Make it work.

I've been dating my guy for a year and still haven't met his parents and, under the circumstances, it doesn't seem weird. Everyone has their own time frame. As long as I'm showing my respect and my effort and they're doing the same, traditional benchmarks are of no mind to me. Trust your gut and you'll be fine.

I didn't ask to meet him that was something he did on his own. I definitely let him do things on his own time. The only thing I ever really requested was the relationship. Which honestly is still working on his time

I can't speak for anyone but myself. To meet a Cap guys parents or family seems like a big deal to me tho. The only reason he's met mine and not me his is that mine were up for a family milestone and they're older than his so I wanted them to meet on the off chance they didn't have another chance to do so. Meeting family is a vulnerability on our part and a source of pride. I don't take it lightly and I don't think the rest of us do either.

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Posted by Foreverloveme
It depends on the relationship for me when it comes to meeting my parents.

For example my mom and I live together, so she has met maybe 3 people over the past 4 years. Very casual meeting. 2 of them were intentional because I wanted her feedback on them...like he's picking me up for a date and Dave this is my mom, mom this is dave...once she asked questions, another time she didn't & we went on our way. The 3rd time he stopped by to pick up something & I introduced them then he left.

In my mind it use to be a really big deal. I've relaxed on that a bit because I want to know that he can love my family as his own & vice versa. It's important to me that everyone can get alone and not just tolerate each other for my sake.