Looking for Dating Advice

I met a capricorn man on an online dating site on April 15th. We didn't meet until June 3rd. We've gone on two dates in the month of June. He gave me a nice romantic kiss on the first date. Over two weeks later on the second date, he held my hand as he walked me to my car. He kissed me once with passion and we talked a few more minutes. Then he kissed me again before leaving. He's always the initiator. I don't because I don't want to rush him and I'm also shy when it comes to this stuff.

Sounds positive, but we don't have a lot of conversation outside of the dates and we don't go on a lot of dates. He hardly texts and when he does, it's like three texts over the course of 12 hours. Sometimes he's a little more talkative, but that's pretty much his norm. I get it, he's not a phone guy. But I also think he sometimes chooses when to message me. In return, I do the same...to a much lesser extent. For example, I may wait about 45 minutes or more to respond. It's like I'm playing hard to get when I'm really only concerned about looking clingy.

He's the first guy I've been interested in a very long time. I would love for things to get serious, but I don't know what to do, especially because he is a capricorn and I don't want to do anything that would make him disappear on me. Any advice—

That's true. I'll try to do that a little more.

For example, I may wait about 45 minutes or more to respond. It's like I'm playing hard to get when I'm really only concerned about looking clingy.

He's the first guy I've been interested in a very long time. I would love for things to get serious, but I don't know what to do, especially because he is a capricorn and I don't want to do anything that would make him disappear on me. Any advice—

He's in a relationship. Every woman has a strong sixth sense. Turn yours on. You're making excuses for him and you shouldn't (I know he doesn't like to text, etc).

I also met my ex bf on line. He IMMEDIATELY deleted his account as did I. That shows you the interest in a man. He would text me all the treetrunking time! Your man "doesn't". We'd go out for lunch and dinner...your man "doesn't". My ex bf and I would talk on the phone about 10% of the time; your man "doesn't". He introduced me to his family as I did, too; you haven't with "your man". My ex bf would stay over and vice versa; sorry, but you haven't with "your man".

He's taken. Sorry; 🤗 cyber hug!

Love,

Eva

I'm totally myself in person when we are together. It's the in between where I think too much about things. I haven't seriously dated anyone in 4 years so it's definitely scary.

I like that we are taking things slow because that's my approach too. Plus I've read that capricorns can be extremely slow. I don't have expectations right now for us to have a future. He just has qualities I like.

Are you both Capricorn? How old are you both? and in the first date or the time spend in the phone before you didn't ask him if he was dating, seeing, or married to anyone else? What have you talked about anything important or just chit chat?

You know I could be not busy and be in a code up to 45 minutes or in a meeting , why would you worry about that? You don't trust him? Usually you ask someone what are you looking for? Should have casual talked about that and directions.

Hes definitely busy with work, golf, and traveling. I've also gone on two big trips to Nashville and NYC so that's part of the reason I haven't seen him much. I don't know if he's seeing anyone else. He doesn't use the online dating site anymore and we're Facebook friends, but who knows. Anything is possible. I believe he likes me though. He definitely shows it and he kinda said it once when he read my text wrong lol I don't talk about my feelings with him either. Ha if I put myself in his perspective, he might think I'm not that into him because of the same reasons. Never thought of that.

He said he's not married and doesn't have kids. He said he wants a relationship so that implies he's not in one. I think I'm just overthinking everything and I just need to have fun and enjoy it while it's good. And if it doesn't work out oh well. I'll just sing the chorus of "onto the next one" by Jay-z lol

Elle! What's your story??

Absolutely agree

Yea. That's my problem. Bad dating experience years ago. So I've stayed single and have been happy. But now that I'm dating, I have my guard up and feel a little insecure when I overthink things. Trying to just let that go and enjoy the ride. Definitely have to remind myself that from time to time!

Be yourself, have a life, excel in your career or studies. I think Caps are always looking at how successful someone is at what they do. Show that you have a level head. At this stage, he's probably looking at the above to see how you can fit into his life/what you can offer.

Don't forget to also assess him, it's a two way street!

Waiting 45 minutes to respond is like a game. Caps see through that. Plus it appears you're not interested.

I'd rather talk in person one on one.

It's only two dates though, be yourself. Don't worry.

I took the advice on here and it worked. We both responded to each other right away for over an hour. It was fun and flirty 🙂

He is a working man ma. Give him time. It is so easy to be labeled a player, or a cheater because god forbid the man is doing what he is supposed to do (work his tail off) so that he can at least have something to bring to the table, and offer. He sounds like a classy dude, and a gentleman. You sound like you need more of that, and that can make you impatient and want to rush things. Take it slow, be yourself, and be upfront. Let him know how you feel and see things. Be upfront with your intentions. Communication is key.

And please don't take his work ethic for granted. As a workaholic myself, there is nothing worse than a woman who questions my commitment to my job, and complains about my commitment to my job. We are wired differently, and goal oriented. Understand, nothing can get in the way of our goals. Not even a woman. My grandfather used to say in life there are three things: business, family, and friends. They come in that order. Don't take that personally, nor thing negative things about it. Look at it from the perspective of what can come from being with someone who is dedicated to their craft and success.

Saying how I feel is hard for me. I like to know that someone feels the same way first! And I know it's only been two dates, but we've been talking for 2 and a half months. It'd be nice to know exactly what he's thinking about me. I've been taking everyone's advice though. Seems to be working! We've been talking more and he asked me out again tomorrow evening. So regardless of what he doesn't say, he's still interested in seeing me at least!

I think you're right about him questioning me too. @foreverloveme I'm a crab and I definitely hide in my shell so he was not seeing my natural self and was probably wondering if I was that into him. But these talks are encouraging me to feel more comfortable and confident. I'm glad I joined!

Posted by pinkbird03
Saying how I feel is hard for me. I like to know that someone feels the same way first!

You need to work on that. Those are nonsense insecurities which add unneeded complication to things, and can lead to misjudgement. Understand that he can pick up those vibes from you, but he is no psychic. He may be translating that as you not being totally into him, when that is the furthest thing from the truth. Just be yourself and be open. Of course don't become vulnerable either, but definitely let it be know what you think and feel. It adds reassurance, and will make him more comfortable, and open around you. That is how things will flourish!

Good luck, and hopefully things take off for you guys

so many varied responses - my take is that 3 texts in 12 hours is fine - and waiting to respond text is a game and you don't want to play games - keep it real - NO EXPECTATIONS - let it roll, play out as it will - see where it's going - take care of yourself and enjoy your time alone and with him when you can ... don't fall too quickly - you must become friends first and foremost and that takes time and space ...