Naaaah...how weird can it get?

This topic was created in the Capricorn forum by YS1 on Monday, July 14, 2014 and has 24 replies.

Profile picture of YS1
@YS1
12 Years

I'm fully aware that I'm dealing with a full fletched Cap here with pulling back, coming on again strong, disappearing etc. etc. I've been through it all but this beats me. This Cap clearly is interested in me , I'm interested in him and we're very cautious in taking a definite step towards a relationship. Everything is going fine apart from the fact that both of us don't have the guts to tell /show the other that we are truely in love. Last week everything pointed towards that it would finally happen. He messaged me and asked me if I would like to see him . As such not so extreme but, it is the timing, place and circumstances that made his question and invitation "special" , it did point to a "break through" . I replied in such a way that (knowing him) he could still back off if he maybe would get cold feet but clearly accepted the invitation with suggestions for dates. To my big surprise he doesn't reply at all!! Not one sign of life! I can see he has read my message ( three days ago) and I really don't understand why he doesn't reply. It's actually quite rude. He takes the initiative to invite me, I say yes, leave space so that he can gracefully change his mind if he gets scared but no reply at all!! What went wrong??

Profile picture of YS1
@YS1
12 Years

Well, complicated story . First of all we're both (just) divorced, both have children, both still in contact with our exes because of that. We met, we clicked at the first sight , became friends and it became very obvious that there was "more". Last week he went for a short holiday on his own. We had daily , sweet contact, which he initiated ( I actually was careful not to bother him). After the short holiday he would have gone to his ex to see his children ( they live in another country just across the border, he lives in my town , let's say X)Before he left he send me a message, that he would like to come back to X to see me again and meet each other. The special thing is that he would have to leave children/ex to be able to do that for a couple of days.

Profile picture of YS1
@YS1
12 Years

The weird thing is that I would have fully accepted if he would have backed off and he knows that. Children and ex go first, so I see no reason not to reply, even it was an "I'm sorry but I can't make it after all .." ....

Profile picture of YS1
@YS1
12 Years

Ok, not very move from me..
Me : 4th August , 1967 ( I know I'm old)
Him: 5th January , 1970

Profile picture of truecap
@truecap
14 Years10,000+ Posts

Posted by YS1
I replied in such a way that (knowing him) he could still back off if he maybe would get cold feet

Could this be in a way that made him think perhaps you weren't all that into it? Maybe he got the wrong impression....like maybe you would back out.

Just ask him when he's free, set a time and place and tell him to show up. —

Profile picture of Lucriu
@Lucriu
13 Years500+ PostsCapricorn

Never mind, just saw that you put his moon is Sag. Don't chase him at all. Any chasing will lead to him going away. Sags like to be the ones that do the chasing, if you chase them, they??ll feel like you are smothering him.

Profile picture of YS1
@YS1
12 Years

It's very simple. His last message was very sweet, he messages me that he was leaving his holiday place and was heading to his children. Maybe we could meet/see each other next week ( by now this week). I replied, yes that would be nice and gave him two days that I could meet him, if that wasn't possible for him I still could do some other days in two weeks time but if that wouldn't be possible for him ( because of ex/children) I would understand. I think reasonably clear and not pushy or — ... I'm actually getting worried while writing this.. He's usually not like this at all..in his "retreat" we had daily contact, minimum to say good night to each other...

Profile picture of YS1
@YS1
12 Years

And I didn't plan to "chase" him. I was the one who send the last message with several options for him to react. So, I don't have the urge to emphasize my willingness at all. I'm just set back because I think it's very weird behaviour. How can you invite someone, read the (positive) answer and not reply at all?? That's rude!

Profile picture of Lucriu
@Lucriu
13 Years500+ PostsCapricorn

Then maybe something came up, and he could??t tell you because he feels that if he explained to you what happened it's like he owes you explanations. SAG moons are very VERY free and egotistical, they resent having to give explanations, do things they don't want to and are attracted to outgoing, fun, and free people. My best advise is to just give him space and don't try to get any explanations from him. The other side is that he might be playing games, you'll know he's playing games if you have to constantly wonder where this relationship is at and don't want to mess anything up. But as a fair warning, if you want something serious and safe, sag moons are looking for adventure and growth and you guys may not be that compatible.

Profile picture of YS1
@YS1
12 Years

Maybe, but up till now I'm more adventurous, outgoing and getting ahead in my life than he is. That's why he is attracted to me, I leave him and I have have my own things going on. He might be playing games though...but I'm not sure.. He seems more scared then playing games.. Anyway, a pity, I really thought this was going somewhere because we understand each other on "soul level" ...

Profile picture of YS1
@YS1
12 Years

Thanks!! And you're so right! I'm very curious what his next move will be.. I guess it will be nice to post it on the Sag forum then.. As in 10 warnings how a Sag plays games with your heart...

Profile picture of Jenova
@Jenova
12 YearsSagittarius

Posted by YS1
Thanks!! And you're so right! I'm very curious what his next move will be.. I guess it will be nice to post it on the Sag forum then.. As in 10 warnings how a Sag plays games with your heart...

We don't play with people's hearts... we are honest and if we want fun, we say so, if we are in love, we say so....
Feel free to post on the Sag board, most people will tell you this though 🙂
We like people to be real, authentic, honest with us... then you will know fast where if anywhere, this is going... but it looks like you've been given some really decent advice advice anyway from these guys 🙂
Good luck... my own experience with the Cap guy I am interested in is that he keeps up pleasant and friendly contact on a regular basis, he is often far too busy working, but he tends to keep me in the loop when he is overworked/tired/busy/etc and will send a message telling me what's going on until he has time to talk or whatever... and we haven't even met yet... they do seem very careful and cautious and want to be friends first, it's nice. Kind of slow like Virgos but..... easier going, less uptight (he is on the cusp of Sag though and I am Sag + we both have Virgo moon 🙂 that may be an influence) 🙂
Do pop your question over on the Sag boards though ^_^ there should be other insights than mine that will be useful 🙂

Profile picture of YS1
@YS1
12 Years

Well this is a Cap sun and venus with his moon in Sag. I'm a Leo sun and venus with moon in Cap. I think that balances it out a bit. What I mean that he is playing with my heart is that he is "double" in his communication. He's very open, honest , keeps me in the loop, tells me his day, we date ,but he's very cautious when it comes to " taking the plunge". Unfortunately I'm the same so I think we're both being patient and are waiting for the right moment. Everything was building up to this moment the last week , he took the chance and when I accepted ( in a very open and sponteneous way) he goes.... Mute... We both have full and busy lives, both at work as in free time I travel a lot and we both have a lot of artistic things going on. The biggest difference is that I plan my free time and he doesn't . He is the " idea on the spot" guy. I like that but it shouldn't interfere with my schedule. Thinking about it, I wouldnt be surprised if he all of a sudden messages me tomorrow if we can still see each other and where I want to meet. Well... NO! He then just assumed that I blocked off two days of my week because he MAYBE ( because he didn't reply) could make those dates too! That's maybe honest and wanting to have fun and showing me that he loves me but it's also ignoring that I have a life too. It's on his time and when and how he wants it... ...not having the decency to reply , say yes or no or I will come back on it and expecting that the other person will go with whatever ....that's selfish...

Profile picture of YS1
@YS1
12 Years

And yes... I can read his mind... I said that I could make it either today or tomorrow. In my country it's now 10 min before midnight and who sends me a message to meet up tomorrow? Mr Cap/Sag.. And on top a whole report on how his weekend was. Now, from either Cap or Sag point of view.. Why NOW and not three days earlier?

Profile picture of YS1
@YS1
12 Years

To finish the story.... And i'ts so Cap/Sag...he read my message just before he went off to his children. He was in a hurry, couldn't choose which date/suggestion and wanted to think about it .Then left for country X and left his phone at home, so he went "poof" .When back he read my message again, was pondering about what to answer and in the meantime fell asleep, being exhausted after a busy weekend, woke up just before midnight and send me the message. Next morning after my reply that I couldn't make it anymore at his time and suggested another time, his reply " no problem at all, I'm the one who should apologize. I'm really looking forward seeing you again" with a blushing smiley...men.. He's done this once before and I hate him for it but it also melts my heart...