Gemini Man FWB Scorpio Woman

Hi Geminis! You interesting bunch.
Anyways,I, the Scorpio, met this 21 year old Gemini in a class I had fall 14 semester, and I always thought he was cute and flirting with me (offering to tutor me, etc). We exchanged numbers and texted back and forth and one day I tried to ask where he stood. Unfortunately, I messed up and asked him if we were "talking" and it backfired. He scrammed and I didn't hear much from him after. He gave me some generic answer about wanting to have fun and not interested in commitment, which I hear is common for Gemini, let alone a 21-year-old college boy. Fast forward to last spring, and I end up dating one of his high school friends by chance who is also a Gem. We have a few conversations about that. I noticed he would ask if I was dating the other Gem often, but the convos were spread apart.

Fast forward to last night, he shoots me a FB message asking me how I am and am I going to a local music festival. I said no, but my ex-Gem might be. He asked if I stopped dating the high school friend and I said yes, at the time he didn't want commitment and I did, emphasis on "at that time" cause I had a feeling, I got Gem experience through his friend, so I wanted to test the waters. He said, "Sometimes it's hard to make a commitment. Especially when you're so young. Having fun can be nice 🙂" and I agreed and insinuated that my wants had changed as in I see now no strings is the way to go and casual dating and sex is better, especially when school is so busy (I'm pre-med and the Gem is pre-pharm).

He told me to let him know if I wanted to listen to some new music at his place and have fun to let him know, and silly me got caught up in the fact that this guy I liked for so long thought I was actually hookup worthy, and we both happened to be free today (my plans got canceled and this is one of his few free days. He's super social, full time summer school about to start and also busy hours at work as a pharm tech).

You can imagine how the convo flowed from there, and you could very well argue that I did it to myself by agreeing to hookup with someone I like as more than just FWB, but I was being impulsive and gave in. I enjoyed it , it was a good time and he was a good lover. No less, I do still want more than just a casual hookup. I ran off my ex-Gemini this way, by asking for too much and being too intense, but I want to know if I give him his freedom, could I luck out and gain something really out of this?

Side note, at the end of today, he said he wanted to keep it FWB "to avoid any problems" and he's still not interested in a relationship. I'm trying to see if he wants to at least date but if FWB is what he wants I'm gonna try my hardest to make it work.

Unless you Gems say it won't, I'll heed your advice.

Actually no, I've always liked him, but hooking up with him yesterday was a plus. My question is am I gonna have to settle for this, or (if I play my cards right) can I turn this into something more?

When a gem tells you from the start that is only FWB and fun, it would get hard to get something else from him... If you are getting in expecting to get something else, my advise would be to run.
We are clever, so we will get your intentions very fast, and things won't get pretty, cause he will run away from you to avoid falling or commintment
If you push he will run faster, and if you keep pushing things can get bad, very bad.

If you want him around, try being his friend...

Tete, I realize that he made it clear he's not looking for commitment right now, so I guess that I should just accept it for what it is now, considering his opinion on commitment has not changed in over a year (from the time I messed up by asking if we were "talking" to now). If all we're going to be is FWB, I might as well enjoy it. I'm dating other guys and such but was particularly hopeful about this one. He messaged me back this morning about my dating question and said "We'll be FWB for now. It can change laterrr maybe 🙂" This contradicts a lot of the things he said to me in bed, but whatever, smh.

moongem, point conceded.

Eh i dont agree that if a gem said 'this' in the beginning that's just what its gonna stay. We change our minds all the time, with new info, new feelings, etc. So it could change. But...doesn't mean it will. And you would have to put yourself out there to get hurt.

Not a male gem, but female and dating a scorp male. This couple lol soo difficult yet so drawn to each other. Interestingly enough, we started as fwb. That was my decision. I didn't want to commit at the time. After a few months, I realized i did though. Idk bout other gems...but im extremely jealous and possessive. I liked what i was getting and i wanted it to be MINE haha. I couldn't imagine sharing. Even though i wasn't sharing really, i wanted him to be committed officially. Well by the time i wanted it he did not. I was heartbroken. I told him i respect his honesty on where he stood, but i wanted more. I couldn't settle for half anymore. I was ready to walk. Then he came around and we have been together for 2 years in july.

Not saying thats the way you should go, just giving you my experience. And gems can and most likely will change their minds at some point. We are flexible like that. You though...are you? Can you change if hes ready? Can you go with the flow until he is? Guess it depends on how much you like him and how much you are willing to risk.

MayDay31, I see what you mean. My ex-Gem made it sound like if I hadn't pressured him for commitment he would have stuck around. With that ex, it was crazy. We went from first date to relationship to FWB to dating to relationship to FWB to nothing in the span of a month. Freaking rollercoaster. I'm gonna try to remember to just go with the flow but my sun, moon, and venus are all in water. 😢 I'm going to try to stick it out and hope I get lucky, metaphorically, and maybe one day he'll want more, or just me. I paid the price for not going with the flow with my ex-Gem. I have experience and I think I'll handle this better.

It's weird that my current Gem didn't want to commit cause in bed (and high as well) he was going on and on about all my good qualities and he told me at least 15 times I was so pretty, and even said perfect a couple of times. He went slow with me, wanted to take his time with me. Then, when he came down from the high, said he didn't care if I slept with anyone else....but when he was high and in bed with me asked me to not sleep with anyone else, he even said he wanted to be the best so I wouldn't want to sleep with anyone else, only he would get special privileges with me, etc. I'm trying to decide if high words or actions mean more. IDK. Maybe he's trying to save face? Something isn't adding up.

Bumping this because updates.

So this Gem texts me at 2:41 this morning asking me "1-10 honestly how good was that" He makes beats/produces music as a hobby so I figured a link was missing or something. So I asked him "How good was what? If you say deez nuts, I swear..." And he said "hahaha sorta, not sure if I pleased you or not, the "session" ".

I don't know why he needs to know the answer to the question if what he said after is true and he doesn't care who else I sleep/am with...

Wow, sounds like he's comparing himself to his fellow gem friend. I find it interesting that he tries to get with you after his friend was with you. Making rounds...

He very well may be, but I would be surprised. The current Gem and ex-Gem weren't even friends on Facebook until I told my ex-Gem (while we were still together) that I knew the current Gem. If they're comparing notes, the current Gem definitely got the better end of the deal.

The current Gem told me post-hookup that he thought I looked too innocent (before all this went down...actually almost a year ago probably, was when he said he was telling a friend this), and I suspect if he had spoken to my ex-Gem prior to hooking up with me, he would have known I was the type to hookup.