How do you get a gem guy to stop asking you out? We work together but as contractor, no hierarchy
Gently Reject Gemini Guy
He seems to have a big ego and is only 2 years out of his divorce. I've given excuses to avoid the dates and even told him I don't look at him like that. We work together but as contractors. I like him as a person but not romantically
People will only do this when given a green light to approach.
If you were to actually treat him and his advances indifferently, then he would see the red light and back off.
Since he continues ... then it means that you are encouraging him to. So, really this thread isn't about how to stop him ....... it's in place for you to show your viewing audience that you are being sought after, to feed your ego.
Posted by livictoriSimple, tell him you find his continued advances unprofessional and uncomfortable and if your going to continue working together it needs to cease. Lay out very clear boundaries. Be unemotional and have strength behind your words.
How do you get a gem guy to stop asking you out? We work together but as contractor, no hierarchy
Posted by GetMistedgrab the pussy with our tiny handsPosted by P-AngelSounds like something Donald Trump would say.
People will only do this when given a green light to approach.
If you were to actually treat him and his advances indifferently, then he would see the red light and back off.
Since he continues ... then it means that you are encouraging him to. So, really this thread isn't about how to stop him ....... it's in place for you to show your viewing audience that you are being sought after, to feed your ego.
click to expand
Posted by livictoriI work with contractors as well in a male dominated field. If your getting the vibe that the dude is crushing on you then its a must to keep things strictly business. Don't ask about his weekend, his marital status etc. Any interest will be seen as a green light for him to make a move.
He seems to have a big ego and is only 2 years out of his divorce. I've given excuses to avoid the dates and even told him I don't look at him like that. We work together but as contractors. I like him as a person but not romantically
If conversation is getting too personal I redirect the conversation back to work. He asks you about your weekend plans. "Oh I'm very busy. In fact I have a job I'll need you to bid for this upcoming week. What does your schedule look like.."
You should never need to feel like you have to invent a bf to be left alone. Take control and shut that shit down.
Posted by livictori
I've given excuses to avoid the dates
that is giving him a green light.
This is virtually saying: If I wasn't busy, then I might be interested
to give an excuse as to why you can't now ... is telling him you might later
Again ...... you're leading him on, you are giving him a green light to pursue. If you really didn't want him to approach you in this manner then your actions/responses to him would represent it. According to what you wrote, your actions/responses are telling him to continue pursuing in hopes of catching you at a time when you're available.
You're not going to fool me, I see your game for attention.
Posted by P-AngelYou conveniently left out the part where I told him "I didn't look at him like that". We're real estate agents, you have to be civil and maintain relationships without hurting people. It's a petty and sometimes vindictive business. Reputations get ruined very easily. I'm looking for effective ways to say no with DECORUM.Posted by livictori
I've given excuses to avoid the dates
that is giving him a green light.
This is virtually saying: If I wasn't busy, then I might be interested
to give an excuse as to why you can't now ... is telling him you might later
Again ...... you're leading him on, you are giving him a green light to pursue. If you really didn't want him to approach you in this manner then your actions/responses to him would represent it. According to what you wrote, your actions/responses are telling him to continue pursuing in hopes of catching you at a time when you're available.
You're not going to fool me, I see your game for attention.
click to expand
Sidenote: the fact you came back to chastise me and further dissect my post when I elected to not engage; says something about your ego.
Posted by littlenanobyteI TOLD HIM I DON'T LOOK AT HIM LIKE THAT! where is the confusion? what am I not saying?
Do you like the attention he's giving you? Serious question.
Take control of the situation, I'm sure you're a big girl.
How hard is it to say "I'm sorry, but I want to keep our relationship strictly professional here at work, PERIOD, NO exceptions." Be firm and demand that he respect that.
I have a feeling you're being being evasive though, because you said that you make excuses. Making excuses is not acceptable. He is not a mind reader. No one is.
Gemini men are not stupid. The only person failing to communicate effectively is you. He would back off if you said that ^^^^
Posted by livictoriYou tell it to his face.
How do you get a gem guy to stop asking you out? We work together but as contractor, no hierarchy
Unless you semi find the pleasure in the attention.
If not, and you're cringing like a wrinkled rag, then hurry it up and tell him to move it.
that's the point of this post. I'm saying no. It's not getting through and instead of accused of liking it. Great? You get referrals based on relationships. Contract negotiations are based on relationships. Some of us have multiple and inter sectional business relationships. I'm not flaunting my vagina in front of him, I'm saying I don't see you as someone I want to date. He's not getting it. We're not on the phone in the middle of the night and hell we don't even have lunch together. But when he asked me to the movie, I said I don't see him that way. When he asked to go out for drinks, I told him I dont drink. When he asked me to a cook out, I told him I was busy. As agents you do talk to people about a myriad of things for a myriad of reasons. I'm not flirting with him. I was simply asking how to GENTLY (and apparently not recommended) way to say no. It's only the two times and I'm trying to prevent a third. I can't believe I have to defend trying to find a nice way to say no
Posted by livictoriPosted by P-AngelYou conveniently left out the part where I told him "I didn't look at him like that". We're real estate agents, you have to be civil and maintain relationships without hurting people. It's a petty and sometimes vindictive business. Reputations get ruined very easily. I'm looking for effective ways to say no with DECORUM.Posted by livictori
I've given excuses to avoid the dates
that is giving him a green light.
This is virtually saying: If I wasn't busy, then I might be interested
to give an excuse as to why you can't now ... is telling him you might later
Again ...... you're leading him on, you are giving him a green light to pursue. If you really didn't want him to approach you in this manner then your actions/responses to him would represent it. According to what you wrote, your actions/responses are telling him to continue pursuing in hopes of catching you at a time when you're available.
You're not going to fool me, I see your game for attention.
Sidenote: the fact you came back to chastise me and further dissect my post when I elected to not engage; says something about your ego.
click to expand
Posted by livictoriyou nailed it right there darlin. sometimes the nice way doesn't always work out. trust this from a "nice" woman who's tried the same. as people have been saying, you must be firm and straightforward. I don't want to go out with you, not now not ever. period. not I dont drink, or I'm not hungry, or I'm busy. those things can change in his mind so the pursuit is not over. it's over when you say GAME OVER. unfortunately, the more you try to be nice, the more he'll probably pursue. don't worry about not being seen as the nice person you are. nice people have boundaries too. just draw them and continue on as your normal sweet self. yeah it's not fun but if what you really want is for him to stop, shoot it straight and clear.
that's the point of this post. I'm saying no. It's not getting through and instead of accused of liking it. Great? You get referrals based on relationships. Contract negotiations are based on relationships. Some of us have multiple and inter sectional business relationships. I'm not flaunting my vagina in front of him, I'm saying I don't see you as someone I want to date. He's not getting it. We're not on the phone in the middle of the night and hell we don't even have lunch together. But when he asked me to the movie, I said I don't see him that way. When he asked to go out for drinks, I told him I dont drink. When he asked me to a cook out, I told him I was busy. As agents you do talk to people about a myriad of things for a myriad of reasons. I'm not flirting with him. I was simply asking how to GENTLY (and apparently not recommended) way to say no. It's only the two times and I'm trying to prevent a third. I can't believe I have to defend trying to find a nice way to say no
Ok I know your situation. You need a bit of psychology here. Rejection brings out his ego and will take it as a challenge to get you in bed. The best way to put him off is to make yourself boring to him. For that to happen reply him with one word and not to elaborate like when he ask you how are you just say OK. Geminis hate this kind of replies. And they will run away from people with this kind of attitude. Try to avoid conversation that stimulates his mind.
Posted by livictoriThere's wiggle room there. He might be thinking, she doesn't look at me like that but I can get her to change her mind if I wine and dine her.Posted by littlenanobyteI TOLD HIM I DON'T LOOK AT HIM LIKE THAT! where is the confusion? what am I not saying?
Do you like the attention he's giving you? Serious question.
Take control of the situation, I'm sure you're a big girl.
How hard is it to say "I'm sorry, but I want to keep our relationship strictly professional here at work, PERIOD, NO exceptions." Be firm and demand that he respect that.
I have a feeling you're being being evasive though, because you said that you make excuses. Making excuses is not acceptable. He is not a mind reader. No one is.
Gemini men are not stupid. The only person failing to communicate effectively is you. He would back off if you said that ^^^^click to expand
You have to be more straightforward. Put the pressure back on him. Have him sweating for once. You don't have to be mean to do this.
As real estate agent I'm sure your accustomed to putting pressure on a client to make a decision or on another agent to lower the price. Your able to excercise that skill while still maintaining those relationships, utilize it here.
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Why?
One day YAKITY YAK YAK, and another day... SILENCE! Like he'll stare at me, and say hi to me, but other than that he'll just act like I'm not there at all.
What am I supposed to do? Should I try to talk to him anyway when he does this?
I posted about him before, he's the ex I bumped into after 10 years.. He took my number and ended up texting me to go out two weekends ago.
We both said we were tired and would only have 1 beer, but 1 beer turned into 3.. 3 beers turned into more drinks
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how are them guys in bed?
why do you hate em?
why do you love em?
what's their button?
what's their weakness?
wh
What kind of girl have you fallen for, fell in love with? Was it the shy demure type? Passionate and playful? Intellectual? What was one trait they had or had to have? What was their sun, moon and Venus?
Hi everyone.
Straight forward question.
What does it look like/feel like when a Gemini man takes you or your relationship for granted? What's a normal level of communication?
We used to talk for hours each night and I would get texts all day long
That you have noticed.
What's your experience with Gemini man in a relationship?
Hi everyone :-)
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