How do I get guys to respect me?

This is really tiring. I work hard. I dress modestly. I don't get it/
I've had two guys claim they were interested in me..both interested in hooking up. One told me he was masturbating as we were on the phone! I was friends with a guy(that I actually hooked up with..fwb) that had a decent amount of power over me for some time. I feel ashamed that I let it happen, because I kind of didn't even realize until after he cut me off. Now I feel like this guy will never respect me no matter what, I'm not sure how to go about it. Is there anything I can do? And how can I gain that respect back when a guy has had control?

Drop him. Why would you want to keep him around?

If he reaches out to you, don't respond. Don't bother at all. That'd be the only way to get the "power" back in the situation. Whether he'll care or not is another story. If he's a Leo, me might. How dare anyone not bother to acknowledge him??

But otherwise, don't give him the time of day if he reaches out.

I always have that sliver of hope that each time he comes back things will be different. They usually are at first, then he reverts. He's Cancer. The two guys that wanted to just hook up were Taurus and Libra.

respect yourself first and then everything will follow you can dress as modest as you want and you can work your ass off but respect comes from within and if you haven't sorted yourself on the inside then don't expect a guy to be able to sort you out.....its the same as loving yourself..

Also its best to meet lots of different people especially those that are out of town and have a new fresh outlook on life.....if you're only meeting local douches, they're all gonna be the same.

Posted by mgmtlove
I always have that sliver of hope that each time he comes back things will be different. They usually are at first, then he reverts. He's Cancer. The two guys that wanted to just hook up were Taurus and Libra.

I went through the same thing with a fwb. It's not going to change. They only pretend to change so they can get laid and then they go back to being stupid. In my situation, the only thing that kept biting me in the ass was that I wanted to get laid. I knew exactly why he was coming around and shaping up suddenly. I considered it an interesting male behavioral study haha. Now, when I do hear from him on occasion, I have to bite my tongue and not ask "what do you want?"

It's like when they were little, when they wanted something from mommy, they got all sweet and behaved until she gave in to them. As soon as they got what they wanted, they go back to being troll children. Funny how some do the same shit when involved with women haha.

f* $ & TMI. why dont you just tell everyone all your sex details instead of the real question(sarcasm)

Posted by staelz
f* $ & TMI. why dont you just tell everyone all your sex details instead of the real question(sarcasm)

Who are you talking to?

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by mgmtlove
I always have that sliver of hope that each time he comes back things will be different. They usually are at first, then he reverts. He's Cancer. The two guys that wanted to just hook up were Taurus and Libra.

I went through the same thing with a fwb. It's not going to change. They only pretend to change so they can get laid and then they go back to being stupid. In my situation, the only thing that kept biting me in the ass was that I wanted to get laid. I knew exactly why he was coming around and shaping up suddenly. I considered it an interesting male behavioral study haha. Now, when I do hear from him on occasion, I have to bite my tongue and not ask "what do you want?"

It's like when they were little, when they wanted something from mommy, they got all sweet and behaved until she gave in to them. As soon as they got what they wanted, they go back to being troll children. Funny how some do the same shit when involved with women haha.

click to expand

How you even talk to him? The first thing I'd ask is "what do you want",lol. Wow, that's crazy, so they'll never change huh? :/ That's sad. We actually did have fun sometimes.

Posted by mgmtlove

How you even talk to him? The first thing I'd ask is "what do you want",lol. Wow, that's crazy, so they'll never change huh? :/ That's sad. We actually did have fun sometimes.

When I'm not currently annoyed or pissy atm, I can keep a light convo.

It usually went something like, not hearing from him for awhile, then I'd hear from him- mostly small talk. The frequency in which he got in touch was higher, etc. Then he'd ask to hang out/make plans. Then he'd go back to disappearing for awhile or not initiating much as far as convo or plans.

I'm not sure if he was aware or not, but I was. It amused me because it was so transparent.

There are times I wonder if so many of these guys, whether serious relationships, fwb, or just friends, realize how typical their tactics are, how all the excuses sound the same, and all the behavior is the same. Do they read the same book growing up on how to handle these situations? It's kind of hilarious. It's even funnier when you call them out on it because they backpedal like whoa and play dumb.

As far as it changing, who knows. I think that's more of an individual basis. But unfortunately, once you've hit this realm with a dude, chances of them changing aren't very high. You're better off moving along than waiting around for him to have an epiphany of. Guys like this are just self serving and don't give a shit about you once they get what they want. It's sad, but true.

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by mgmtlove

How you even talk to him? The first thing I'd ask is "what do you want",lol. Wow, that's crazy, so they'll never change huh? :/ That's sad. We actually did have fun sometimes.

When I'm not currently annoyed or pissy atm, I can keep a light convo.

It usually went something like, not hearing from him for awhile, then I'd hear from him- mostly small talk. The frequency in which he got in touch was higher, etc. Then he'd ask to hang out/make plans. Then he'd go back to disappearing for awhile or not initiating much as far as convo or plans.

I'm not sure if he was aware or not, but I was. It amused me because it was so transparent.

There are times I wonder if so many of these guys, whether serious relationships, fwb, or just friends, realize how typical their tactics are, how all the excuses sound the same, and all the behavior is the same. Do they read the same book growing up on how to handle these situations? It's kind of hilarious. It's even funnier when you call them out on it because they backpedal like whoa and play dumb.

As far as it changing, who knows. I think that's more of an individual basis. But unfortunately, once you've hit this realm with a dude, chances of them changing aren't very high. You're better off moving along than waiting around for him to have an epiphany of. Guys like this are just self serving and don't give a shit about you once they get what they want. It's sad, but true.

click to expand

I guess your right. The day he said goodbye I cussed him out so bad. My goal was to hurt him so bad he never comes back. But I guess if he doesn't even respect me, I can't hurt him. Plus he acts like he doesn't even have feelings. Hmm. I guess we'll see. :/

*you're