Is this normal...?

I've hurt my Leo BF so many times. I would always start the fight and tried to break up with him 7 times, mainly because I thought he's cheated on me, over sex (I'm nowhere near as active as him and I thought he was using me for only sex) or over misunderstanding. But he would always take me back after a fight, or beg me to stay. I don't know how many chances he will give me...but is it normal for a Leo to give so many chances? And do Leo's mean it if they constantly say they love you? Are Leo's faithful? And he openly told me I break his heart and that I hurt him, and he doesn't want to be hurt.

And the reason I thought he cheated on me was because he suddenly stopped being responsive, there was a sudden change in his behaviour. The communication seemed off and he was still on the dating site I've met him on despite we are official and exclusive. He told me his membership ends soon, and he couldn't delete the profile until the member ship ends in a month. That is why I thought he was cheating. It is unclear whether he is losing interest, seeking other people or he is genuinely busy and stressed with the army. Once, I've threatened to breakup and he lost all his supplies, got yelled at by his commanding officers and had to buy the equipment all again worth 1 month of his salary. He also told me he had intentions killing and hurting himself as well as crying once I mentioned breaking up. He always denies cheating but I have literally no proof.

He must enjoy the dramafest, you

*virginal* vegan aviator, you.

Posted by vegansagittarius
I've hurt my Leo BF so many times. I would always start the fight and tried to break up with him 7 times, mainly because I thought he's cheated on me, over sex (I'm nowhere near as active as him and I thought he was using me for only sex) or over misunderstanding. But he would always take me back after a fight, or beg me to stay. I don't know how many chances he will give me...but is it normal for a Leo to give so many chances? And do Leo's mean it if they constantly say they love you? Are Leo's faithful? And he openly told me I break his heart and that I hurt him, and he doesn't want to be hurt.

And the reason I thought he cheated on me was because he suddenly stopped being responsive, there was a sudden change in his behaviour. The communication seemed off and he was still on the dating site I've met him on despite we are official and exclusive. He told me his membership ends soon, and he couldn't delete the profile until the member ship ends in a month. That is why I thought he was cheating. It is unclear whether he is losing interest, seeking other people or he is genuinely busy and stressed with the army. Once, I've threatened to breakup and he lost all his supplies, got yelled at by his commanding officers and had to buy the equipment all again worth 1 month of his salary. He also told me he had intentions killing and hurting himself as well as crying once I mentioned breaking up. He always denies cheating but I have literally no proof.

have you calmly discussed his sudden change in behavior and unresponsiveness? did he give you any reason for it or have an open discussion about it? That is something you need to address but in a calm and mature manner.
also, do you know if he has been regularly active on the dating site? or is his page just up there? if he isnt actually using the site and logging on frequently i would wait for the membership to end, ask him to get rid of it and then see if he stays off it whilst you continue with the relationship.
Don't just threaten to end it everytime you hit a roadblock or feel emotional about something, that isn't healthy and he will start thinking you're crying wolf if you don't actually mean it and follow through. You need to learn to breathe in, order your thoughts, think about whether the issue is actually an issue and then tackle it but without putting all the blame on him. Be a little more gentle with your approach.

Posted by Montgomery
He must enjoy the dramafest, you

*virginal* vegan aviator, you.

I believe it's very possible....I dated a Leo off and on for 6 years and knew he loved the drama. How? They tend to think it's some movie and after yelling and arguing they want to have sex and think you do too smh...Stay the eff away from me, I will slap you...I don't feel loving or intimate after a disagreement need time to process.

Posted by Elle77

Posted by Montgomery
He must enjoy the dramafest, you

*virginal* vegan aviator, you.

I believe it's very possible....I dated a Leo off and on for 6 years and knew he loved the drama. How? They tend to think it's some movie and after yelling and arguing they want to have sex and think you do too smh...Stay the eff away from me, I will slap you...I don't feel loving or intimate after a disagreement need time to process.

click to expand

Omg hahahaha I spit out my drink with your response. " I will slap you"


Funny as heck! Amen!

I'm a student airline pilot. I guess everything was wonderful with our relationship at first. He would text, call and Skype with me 24/7. I was very annoyed and I couldn't fly or study at all. After a crisis with the flying school, our relationship began to become turbulent and break down like airflow. I talked to him about my issues and asked for space. I needed to sort out the issues I had with the chief flying instructor along with many exams coming up. He didn't like that and was upset, but he still have me space. Then, I came across his profile and saw it was still active. The flying school crisis already made me feel extremely down, and to see he is still active on his dating profile made my feelings sink even lower. I confronted him and nearly broke up with him. He was really sad at first, but got angry and defensive, shouting to the point I was scared. He told me he has a subscription there before he had met me and it would end in June. He said he has friends there and would never cheat because he has been cheated on. He said he was so busy with his job a d he couldn't reply. That was when I understood and began to back off. I mean, before the dating site thing, I was secure. He didn't reply for 2 weeks once and I never pressure him to reply because like me, I knew he was busy. I was busy building up hours in my logbook anyway. But once there was a sudden change in his behaviour, and saw his profile was still active, and my flying school crisis became very real, I started having a mental breakdown and guess I became paranoid.

YES. after we fight, both of us want sex. I wanted to take away all the pain I have caused with him, all the hurt. And he really wanted it too, and he wanted to feel me. And I needed to show how much I love him. Maybe that's because I am a Leo moon. He is actually a Libra moon, not a Cancer.

Weren't you the one showing him pics of guys you thought were hawt and then wondering why he was insecure about your interest in him...?

Yes. He constantly was insecure about me leaving with another pilot since I have so much men around me. I also didn't reply at times and he was angry about this. Once I ignored him and he blocked me on Skype for attention. I pretended nothing happened and our relationship went downhill. He's like a cat scratching the furniture for attention. And since he got none, he didn't walk away, but continues scratching it until the furniture is wrecked. The furniture alludes to our relationship in this case.

Posted by vegansagittarius
Yes. He constantly was insecure about me leaving with another pilot since I have so much men around me. I also didn't reply at times and he was angry about this. Once I ignored him and he blocked me on Skype for attention. I pretended nothing happened and our relationship went downhill. He's like a cat scratching the furniture for attention. And since he got none, he didn't walk away, but continues scratching it until the furniture is wrecked. The furniture alludes to our relationship in this case.

It really just sounds to me like you were both playing games...
Leo's can totally love games. Up to a point. Then we get bored.
At 19 just my personal opinion, relationships like this are just a flash in the pan, the emotional baggage that comes out of 'em can be a valuable learning tool- but that's about it.
You can run this into the ground trying to play chess with your heart and his heart, or you can move on.
Everything is your call, really...

He told me to stop with the game because he keeps getting hurt. He doesn't want to me to hurt him. I am the queen of games. He never wins, he always ends up hurt in the end. All I have to do is ignore him, never reply and that will rile him up. I don't think he was lying about the membership though, and how he has gay friends on there since he went through a breakup crisis last time and turned to men. He said how his job has him busy and he lost all his supplies all without thinking, responding straight away as well. I don't think fabricating a story would take instantaneous thinking.

And if anyone's in the mood, a super long text:

[18/04 02:37] Me ✈: Are you free to chat for a moment?
[18/04 02:40] Him: Not now sorry sweetie, what's up?
[18/04 02:41] Me ✈: I know now is not the best time to say this, but this is not working out for me. And I want to move on.
[18/04 02:41] Him: Alright sweetie... I...if that's what you want
[18/04 02:42] Me ✈: The dating profile is destroying our relationship. Yet, you have done nothing to save our relationship.
I don't know why you won't be honest with me. I guess you keep on denying this because you still have freedom to speak to other people. If you really love me,  you should have at least done it to save us. Actions speak louder than words. Ever since you've grown distant after that 5 day mission, it feels like everything is an effort. I've done everything I can to save this. I feel demoted to just a sexting buddy.
[18/04 02:55] Him: WELL JUST FUCKING LEAVE SINCE I HAVEN'T HAD TIME TO TRY AND CHANGE IT!!!
[18/04 02:56] Me ✈: No. I feel like you are seeing somebody else.
[18/04 02:56] Him: IVE BEEN HELD DOWN TO SPEND ALL OF MY MONEY TO GET SUPPLIES FOR A MONTH LONG MISSION, IM SORRY FOR NOT WORKING AT YOUR PACE
AND IM NOT SEEING ANYONE ELSE
[18/04 02:56] Me✈: But that site is a paying site.
You've paid to be on that site. What does it say about you?
[18/04 02:56] Him: AND I PAID FOR A YEAR NINE MONTHS BEFORE I MET YOU
[18/04 02:57] Me ✈: I think that you are seeing someone else because you've grown distant ever since that profile was up.
[18/04 02:58] Him: Well than were done, I hope I'm run over by a Bradley out in the field
[18/04 02:58] me ✈: You see. I've tried everything to try and work this out. I've tried to change. I've tried everything.
[18/04 03:00] Him: And I've been busy, I told you my job has me busy, but every girl I've ever been with thinks they're the center of attention
Like they're the only thing that exists...
So I'm done with women, thanks (my name)
[18/04 03:02] Me: I really want this to work out. I really do. I understand you have to work and I support you in every way. But it's the dating site that is killing us. I don't care if you've ignored me for months. I will always be with you. To be honest, you weren't active when we were together and why was it active again later? Could you tell me that? Please don't try to harm yourself...
If you've told me about the 9 month membership, none of this drama would have happened.
[18/04 03:05] Him: Well I'm sorry, it's ending in June, trust me I'm not seeing any other people
[18/04 03:06] Me ✈: Okay. I'm sorry about everything. I've done the wrong thing.

[18/04 03:12] Him: Well it won't be gone until June...I'm sorry, but what you said really hurt...
I don't cheat, I've been cheated on and I hate it just as much as anyone else...
[18/04 03:15] Me ✈: I never should have played with your emotions. Everything that has happened was due to that website.
[18/04 03:16] Him: Don't hurt me (my name) ... I've been hurt before...
[18/04 03:17] Me ✈: It's just that the profile up is making me so insecure and in order to protect myself, I did all these immature things.
[18/04 03:18] Him: I can't delete the account...the membership has to run out. And (my name) you're fine
[18/04 03:20] Me✈: You have no idea how much it breaks my heart to say this. You affect me so much. You think I take joy in hurting the person I love the most in this damn universe? You think I don't feel intense pain about this?
[18/04 03:21] Him: And who would I cheat on you with? A fat Mexican chick or an insane white girl who is also fat?? No I don't cheat and I just don't want to be hurt sweetie, that's all
[18/04 03:24] Me✈: I am not a woman that would wear your rank. I am not a woman who would post on FB about being a GF of the military. I am not a woman who takes pride in your work. I am not a woman who wears Military GF shirts or tags to show how much I love you.
[18/04 03:25] Him: I've been hit and burned by cigarettes by people on that site, do you really think I want that??
[18/04 10:56] Me ✈: I know I screwed up badly. I will give you time to think about it, but focus on work. Work comes first for us. I'm always here for you. I won't bother you anymore. I can understand if you won't be with me anymore. But if you could give me another chance, I promise with all my heart and soul and to God as a witness, none of this mess will ever happen again. The profile thing has been solved, so no more further problems. We will grow stronger through this experience. I have made my final decision and I want to be with you and you only. Take care, I love you.
[18/04 10:59] Him: I love you too sweetie, it's OK â¤

What is that supposed to mean? I don't really care if he is working or if he is stressed and pulling back. I've been in his position. But if he is cheating and wants to be the first person to leave this relationship with another woman, he is being so selfish. Why can't he tell me the truth and stop eating the cake as well as have it/being a substitute?

If he was being genuine, why would he take me back so easily? He would have ditched me, right?

Y"all be on that make up sex, huh?
Winning

Posted by MiZLeo
I can actually see where she is coming from more now that she explained the situation more as to finding him on the dating site........since the same thing happened to me.....and he was talking to other girls.....even tho he told me the same thing about the membership bullshit sooooo....yeah ill just leave it at that.

I agree to be fair. Membership bullshit indeed.

Posted by MiZLeo
Wait that text is confusing.......did you break up or not? Why would anyone pay for a year and 9 month membership to a dating site? Oh and if he is telling the truth about not deleting it cause he cant....have him edit it so it says "I'm in a relationship now but can't delete this profile so please do not contact me" and have him remove his pictures on there if he has any. Then and only then believe him and wait till July to see if it comes down. He can edit the profile....don't let him say he can't.

I like the way you think.
I don't like how some people justify men still having dating profiles up and doing shady shit and disappearing and reappearing whenever it tickles their fancy. Relationships need stability and constant communication. If you can't fucking hack that then don't ever be in a relationship. and I was thinking the EXACT same thing, who pays for a year long subscription on a dating site, I call bullshit. And if he has he but is really and truly as committed to you as he says he is then he should edit the profile and say he is no longer single, no longer looking. If he puts up a fight, then leave him. Long distance is hard, even harder when you're both so busy, so you need to make extra effort to make it work.

i hope your leo leaves you. He honestly has better things on his mind than to play your childish games. He WILL leave you. If a leo loves you we will fight for you BUT that only lasts for so long if the SAME stuff keeps getting brought up again. When he decides to leave you, you will be able to tell the difference, he will become distant, he will stop fighting for you, he wont talk to you as much or not as sweet. Theres a big difference and it seems like you are already starting to see the signs and now you are freaking out. He told you all the drama you cause for him and instead of loving him and being a good supportive gf you are adding stress and hurt and he already told you he does not want to hurt anymore. You say hes the one being selfish but how? he is WORKING and you come to his work with all this drama and you say you "dont care". You should focus on yourself... honestly he is probably already talking to someone else cause i know iw ould if i was dealing with this bs.

unbelievable, the man is in the military
SMH

and no no one is in the mood to read your long childish text